


Genetics Be Damned

by princess_smudge



Category: Sea Patrol (TV)
Genre: Family, Fluff, Gen, hammersleybabies2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2019-04-22
Packaged: 2019-08-19 02:52:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 34
Words: 99,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16525934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princess_smudge/pseuds/princess_smudge
Summary: Mackenzie is thirteen, her favourite colour is orange, and she's come nearly 3000 kilometres to turn Kate's world upside down.





	1. Chapter 1

She can’t believe that she’s travelled almost three thousand kilometres and she’s about to be felled at the last few metres. It’s frustrating beyond belief that Mackenzie wants to scream in rage, but all she can do is watch as the blonde haired woman,  _Kate,_  slips into the pub and out of view. Mackenzie groans, turning imploringly at the hulking man blocking her way. “I’m telling you, I don’t want to drink. I just need to find someone who is in there. She just went in there and all I need to do is talk to her! You can hold my bag as collateral or whatever! I only need a minute!”  

“And I told _you,_ girly, I can’t let you in. You’re gonna have to call your Mum to come and get you.” Mackenzie despises people who call her girly. The impulse to make a hell of a lot of noise grows. But of course she knows that getting into a fight would do her no good here. She's always been scrawny, and would have no chance against a ten year old, let alone a fully grown man. 

She doesn’t dignify his words with a response, and in any case she’s not entirely sure what she would say, because the word  _Mum_ is repeating itself over and over in her head. Instead she settles on rolling her eyes and traipsing back down the road. Who employs a bouncer at a pub on a Tuesday afternoon?

“Great.” She mutters darkly to herself, huffing as she scrapes her hair into a messy bun atop her head. “Brilliant, Zee.”

She takes a seat across the road, leaning her back against a tree and closing her eyes for a moment, letting the cool breeze play on her face. Of course, she’d known this would be difficult. She’d known it wouldn’t have been as simple as hitching to Cairns with a duffel bag and duct-taped sneakers. Had known that fate never favours her. But she’d been so hopeful. Or as hopeful as the circumstances could allow. 

“I can do this.” She whispers to herself. “I can do this.”

She spends most of the evening pacing, too young to rent a hotel room and far too jumpy to sleep. She’s not used to the city, to the sounds of cars and music and drunken laughter. Not used to the sound of the waves or the airplanes flying close overhead every few minutes.

“I can do this.” She repeats.

_Kate? Katie, are you there? I need you._

Zee squeezes her eyes shut, but it does nothing to stop the voice echoing in her head.

_Katie, I’m sorry. Come back!_

“Stop it!” She says out loud, actually clapping her hands over her ears, but as she blinks all she can see is broken glass and blood and  _someonecallanambulanceand-_

 

When the panic attack ends, she's sitting on the cold ground alone, gasping desperately for breath. "It's over,"she whispers to herself. "It's over." 

They're nothing new, really, but this is the first of her attacks in public, and despite the cool air, her face burns with the shame of it all. She hates it, hates everything from her rapidly beating heart to the tears stinging her eyes. And then, just as she’s impatiently wiping the wet from her eyes, she sees a familiar face. Not Kate, but one of the men she was standing with, and without hesitating, she runs up to him, because crying isn't going to help, but this just might. 

“Excuse me?” She calls out, and he looks up. He’s had a few drinks, she can tell, but he seems kind enough as he turns his gaze to her. She wonders vaguely whether he’s friends with Kate, or whether they just work together. “I’m looking for Kate McGregor. It’s really important I find her. Do you have a point of contact or something? You were with her before, right? At the boat?”

“I…” He seems genuinely bewildered.

“Look,” Zee presses, “I know it’s a weird thing to ask, what with me being some random outside a pub but… even if you could get her or… or take me to her? Please?”

“Uh, okay. Come with me. I’ll… I’ll bring you to her. She’s just inside. I’m Dylan by the way. Dutchy.”

“Zee.” She greets back. “Uh, Mackenzie. Zee for short.” The man leads her past the bouncer who nods stiffly and irritably, and Zee feels like flipping him off along the way out of spite, but resists. The pub is surprisingly busy for a midweek afternoon, and she’s so intent on peering around at her surroundings that it takes her a few moments to recognise the woman they were walking towards until-

 _We’ve got the same eyes._ The thought flickers in Zee’s mind before she can stuff it aside, and she sets off mentally cataloguing any other similarities. _Same stare. Same hair colour, even though mine’s shorter. Guess we both got the short genes too._

“Kate?” The guy – Dylan – calls out, and she jerks her head away from her glass of wine in favour of glancing first at him, and then at Zee. Mackenzie wonders vaguely whether she is cataloguing those very same features in her mind, or whether she is just trying to figure out who she is. “Uh, this young lady was after you.” And before Zee can do much more but take in the eyes narrowing in confusion all around her, Dylan disappeared from view. A complete stranger he might be, but his presence was somewhat comforting.

“Yes?” Kate stands up, taking a few steps towards her. And nervous as she is, Zee’s eyes catch sight of a pair of spiky black boots and she instantly longs to try them on. “Do I know you?”

_Do I know you?_

The honest answer was no, but surely, somewhere there had to be something? Some sort of blood connection? And in another life, perhaps...

“No.” Mackenzie begins. Now that she’s here and now, the words are so much harder to get out. “I… uh…” She’s very conscious of the curious looks they are getting. “I… um, is there somewhere we can talk?”

“I… uh…” She hesitates for a moment, glancing back at her friends behind her. “I really should…” There’s something in her eyes. Fear, maybe?

“It’s important.” Zee presses. “Please!”

Kate nods stiffly, scoops up her wine and moves it to a smaller table nestled in the corner. When they’re both seated she peers at Zee. “Uh, sorry, do you want some water or something?”

“No… thanks. I…” She fidgets for a moment with her fingers before shaking her head. “Look, this is all a bit crazy so I’m just going to say it."

"Say what?" She looks genuinely puzzled, and Zee can tell that she is not lying. She has no idea who Zee is either, and with the next three words, her life will be turned upside down too, just as Zee's had been days before.

"I’m your sister.”

“What?” Kate's mouth doesn't fall open. She doesn't drop the wine glass she is holding, or faint, or spit out water or any other number of cliched reactions. She just stares at her, with that same stare Zee has observed her whole life in the mirror. 

“I… I’m your sister. My name is Mackenzie McGregor. I… you’re my sister.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Why are you here?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forgot to give a timeline on this so about six months post season 5 'splosions finale. Thanks everyone for the reviews. Am late for work but wanted to get this out for you all :)

**Chapter Two**

"No." It's the first word out of Kate's mouth, and it hits Zee like a slap so hard she recoils. Of course, she hadn't exactly been expecting happy families, was under no illusions that Kate would remove a  _World's Best Sister_ mug from her bag and they'd fall together in a sisterly embrace. But  _no_?

"Well, it was kind of a shock to me, too." Mackenzie is unable to keep the bite out of her tone, and this time it's Kate that flinches. "I mean, my whole life I'd thought I was an only child, and then  _poof._ " She makes an exaggerated little flourish in Kate's direction before letting her hands fall once more to the table.

Almost absentmindedly, Kate reaches up and drains her wine in two large gulps. "Are you sure?"

"My mother...  _our_ mother is Deborah McGregor, right? What? You think I'm trying to scam you or something? I'm not here for money."

"I… I…" Kate stands up, still shaking her head. "I… I just need a minute."

"Sure…" This was not going to plan at all, and for the first time since she'd first decided to come here, she realises just how foolish a plan this was. "If I'm not here when you get back, the bouncer's probably kicked the unattended minor out."

* * *

"No! No! I don't have a sister, Dutchy. I… I can't go back. I can't talk to her!" Kate is pacing up and down the drive, her heart hammering against her rib cage. Every fibre of her being is telling her to run, and she wants nothing more than to follow her instincts.

"Kate-"

"What does she want, anyway?!" She demands. "She says she doesn't want money! Then why the hell is she here-"

"I think she's been trying to tell you that."

Kate reaches the end of the drive and twists around, continuing her rapid pacing as she fights to make sense of everything that is happening. "I mean I haven't seen my mother since I left for ADFA but… a sister? I mean, it's not like I was bloody unreachable! She could have told me! She  _should_ have told me! And why is  _she_ here? And-"

"Kate!" Dutchy stops her with one hand on each shoulder, so that she is forced to stop pacing. "Go and talk to her. Find out the answers to your questions." He hesitates for a moment before speaking again. "I know… you don't exactly talk about your family. And that's okay. But… that doesn't mean she's the same as whoever it is that hurt you, okay?" A look of concern floods his face then as a thought seems to occur to him. "Where did you leave her, anyway? Please tell me you didn't leave that kid alone in a pub?"

"I'm not a kid." Mackenzie chooses that moment to reveal herself, unable to stand hiding out of sight anymore. "And don't feel bad. This was obviously a bad idea to come here, and no hard feelings, hey." She moves forward, claps a hand on Kate's forearm for a moment, before turning away before they see the forced smile fade, or the tears hit her eyes. This was her last shot, her last hope. Of course, she should have known that Kate wouldn't just welcome her with open arms. After all, the feud between Kate and their mother had to have been pretty significant for neither party to contact the other.

_Katie, Katie, I'm sorry. Forgive me._

"Wait." Zee doesn't immediately turn around, instead squaring her shoulders, as if preparing for battle. But Kate's next words are not what she expects. "Mackenzie, would you like to come back to my place. We can talk? Please?"

* * *

They walk in silence as dusk falls around them, Zee uncomfortably aware of their all-too-even strides. She wonders what other similarities are hidden between them; whether Kate pours her milk around her wheatbix instead of on it, or has cream cheese on her broccoli. Maybe Kate, too, brushes her hair exactly one hundred strokes, or tucks her pillow under her arms rather than under her head.

"Wow." It's the first word that Zee has spoken since agreeing to go to Kate's house, but she can't help the exclamation as she takes in the house in front of them. "It's massive. Do you live here by yourself? I mean… that guy… Dutchy, is he?"

"Just me." Something in the way that Kate says the words tells Zee that there's a story or two in that, and she finds her curiosity peaking. She'd wondered, before she'd arrived, whether her sister would be married, or even have children, as many a woman her age would. This house especially seemed to be a house built for a family.

"Oh. Okay." Mackenzie hastens to smooth over the situation. "I was just wondering because he seemed to be leaving, but then he waited for you after I got there and-"

"He's a friend." Kate says simply, turning the statement into a firm full-stop on the subject. "Here," She holds the door open for Mackenzie to enter and Zee obliges, feeling at awe of all the sheer beauty of the place. Various artworks hang all throughout the hallway walls, and each piece of furniture is so beautifully matched together. "Through here." Kate murmurs, brushing past her and leading the way into a large living room. The room is so open and airy, and the sky outside is aglow with the sunset. "Sit down."

There's a clanging as Kate drops her keys into a fruitbowl on the kitchen bench, heading to the fridge. "Food? Drink?"

"No thanks." She tries to keep the impatience out of her voice. Kate had wanted to talk, hadn't she?

But Kate disregards her refusal at refreshments, taking her time filling two glasses of water and ice. When she's refilled the water jug and returned it to her fridge, she sets one glass on the table in front of Mackenzie and nurses the other in her lap. She looks expectantly at Mackenzie, but irritation and hurt makes Zee determined that Kate shall be the one to begin the conversation, and after a while the older woman breaks the silence.

"Yes. Okay. Well… I… Uh, tell me about yourself? I…" Kate gestures lamely between them, and then shakes her head. "I'm sorry. I know I've been… unwelcoming. Probably not the response you wanted, or… deserve. I just… this whole thing is just the last thing I expected to happen today, and it's been one hell of a patrol…" She lets out a small groan, before taking a gulp of water. "I don't normally ramble like this." She adds the last part more to herself than to Mackenzie, who feels her irritation melt away.

"Then let's start over." She says decisively. "I'm Mackenzie. But you can call me Zee."

Kate smiles softly, and it makes such a difference. She looks younger somehow, less on edge as she holds out a hand. "Well, Zee, it's very nice to meet you. I'm Kate." They shake, still smiling softly at each other. "Won't you tell me about yourself? Why are you… I mean, what brings you here?"

"Um… I'm thirteen, and two weeks ago I found out I had a sister. I mean, completely out of the blue. But when she spoke about you and… she was a little confused and I only got a few details. So it took me a bit to track you down. I mean, Kate's not exactly a rare name, you know? But after I found out you were in the Navy, it was pretty simple. I got in town two days ago, but you were out on patrol and then at the pub and I couldn't…"

"Confused?" Kate repeats the word like it's poison in her mouth. "Is that code for drunk?"

Mackenzie sniffs and snatches her glass up instead of answering, before realising all too late that Kate would take that as an affirmation.

"Sorry." Kate apologises again, before Mackenzie can do anything to correct the impression. "That was pretty bitchy. I... so where are you guys staying?"

"Guys?" Mackenzie repeats, and then realises what Kate is asking. "Well, I… it's just me, actually."

"What?!" Of all the things that she has said tonight, this seems to be the part that has caused Kate the most shock. "You're here alone? Where's… where's Debbie?"

Debbie. Of course she would call her Debbie. And how dare Kate act all protective after little over half an hour in each other's company? "I can take care of myself, okay?"

"Where have you been staying? Surely you haven't gotten a motel?"

"I... I sleep in the library during the day. It's easy enough. You grab a few complex textbooks and everyone thinks you've crashed out because of a study overload."

Kate shakes her head again, disregarding what Mackenzie feels is a pretty smart plan. "And night? You're not just wandering the streets? It's not safe!" She is looking at Zee as though she is a stupid little girl, climbing into vans for candy.

"Look, I didn't come here for a lecture, alright?" Mackenzie demands, drawing her duffel a little closer to her body.

"Does Debbie even know you're here?" Kate presses, setting her glass of water down so hard that splashes slop against the wood of the coffee table.

"No, actually." Zee admits. Kate hesitates for a moment before rising, scraping her mobile off the counter and flinging it onto the lounge next to Zee.

"Call her! Right away."

"She won't answer." Mackenzie whispers softly, trying to blink the tears from her eyes as she forces herself to look up at Kate. "There was… a car accident." Kate sucks in a breath, and Mackenzie forces herself to keep talking, even if the words sound dead and flat. "It spun and we rolled and hit a tree. It hit her side and… that's when she spoke about you. That's why I'm here."

_Kate. Katie, please forgive me. My daughter. Please._

Kate curses under her breath, seeming to fall back into her chair behind her. "You were there too?"

Zee closes her eyes, trying to block out the sound of crunching glass and screaming that seems to have filled her head since it happened. Eyes still closed, she shrugs one shoulder out of her jacket so that Kate can see the ugly stitches criss-crossing their way down her forearm. "I escaped with twenty-odd stitches. It was Mum's side that..." Her voice cracks and when she opens her eyes, it's to see the fresh tears swimming in Kate's. "Mum is all I have. I know you two must have had your problems but... she got better. It was always her and me."

"What about your father?" From anyone else, the question might seem insensitive, but Zee can tell it's a matter of curiosity rather than a need for gossip.

Zee shrugs. "I see him but… he's not the father type. It's like he was Mum's boyfriend rather than my dad, you know. But they ended things a while back, when I was five. After that it was just me and Mum. Until…" And then it seems Zee can stop it no more and lets out a shuddering gasp as sobs begin to wrack her body. "I came - to find you - b-because… I need you - to help - me save her."

"Save her?" Kate blinks, and there's a tear trailing down her cheek too. "But I thought you said…" She hesitates for a moment, then lowers her voice. "I thought you said she was dead?"

Zee shakes her head softly. "The doctors say she's braindead." She whispers too, as if something more might be listening to them. "But I know they're wrong." She looks into the eyes that are so like her own. "And I need you to help me save her."


	3. Chapter 3

When Kate heads downstairs the next morning, pyjama-clad and tousle-haired, there's a moment, in which she takes in her empty lounge, and she allows herself to consider that Mackenzie McGregor was nothing more than a character in a dream. The fact that the brain couldn't make up faces during dreams meant nothing; the blonde teen was probably just some random person she'd crossed on the street.

Would that be a good thing or not?

Before she's had the chance to decide, however, she catches sight of the blonde sitting cross-legged in her backyard and soaking up the morning rays with her face upturned to the sky. In the sunlight, she looks almost ethereal, and in that moment it seemed she could start to levitate off the ground and it would look completely normal. As though to complete this near-supernatural look, a skinny black kitten is curled neatly on her lap. Feeling her stomach churn at the thought of the enormity of the task ahead of her, Kate forces herself to move forwards, pushing open the sliding door and moving closer to Mackenzie.

"Couldn't sleep?" Kate asks. The young girl had crashed out on her lounge not long after presenting Kate with her impossible task, and Kate hadn't the strength nor energy to transfer her into a spare room. Instead, she'd covered her with a blanket and retreated to her own room for a night of tossing and turning.

Mackenzie shrugs, twisting slightly to peer more closely at Kate. "I'm used to sleeping during the day now, anyway. It's okay. Plenty of time to sleep when I'm home." She rocks forwards on her feet, moving into a standing position with the grace of a ballerina, before nodding to the cat that had leapt from her lap and was now mewling around her ankles. "I couldn't find the cat food. Your little guy is starving."

Kate frowns at the ball of fluff. "I have never seen that kitten before in my life. He's probably a stray."

"You got any tuna then? He's skin and bones." Mackenzie lifts the kitten to her, cradling it against her chest like a baby. "If not I'll wander out to the shops and grab him something. And then we'll have a bath, won't we? You're a bit of a stinky kitty." She directs her last two sentences to the kitten in her arms, who mewls again in response.

Deciding that now is not the time to argue with her sister – her  _sister_ – about taking in stray cats, Kate gestures lamely towards her kitchen. "There's tins of tuna in the pantry." She murmurs.

"Thanks." The teenager carries the kitten with her, leaving Kate alone in her backyard once more. For a moment she breathes in the new morning, but she can find no peace in it. There's no desire to do her morning yoga either, or run, or any of those things that normally settle her mind.

Deciding that she needs a coffee more than anything else, she turns towards her kitchen, but before she can put one foot inside, Mackenzie is returning with the kitten in one hand, and a dinner bowl of tinned tuna in the other. "See." Mackenzie smiles. "Starving, poor little mite. I'll write down a decent brand of cat food for you, though. To help him put on some weight. Mum and I are always taking in starving kittens. Got my friend looking after them while I'm gone. But he'll come good."

"Mackenzie…" Kate begins, with no idea where she's going to begin.  _I'm not taking in a bloody cat? Mum is braindead and can't be saved? I'm on patrol in three days?_

"So, I totally crashed out yesterday but I wanted to hear what you're like. Aside from, you know, the golden girl of the Navy. You know how many articles you're in? But, I mean," Mackenzie crouches down to stroke the kitten's fur. "You got a boyfriend? Or a girlfriend? What do you do exactly? I mean, I don't know much about you."

"I..." Kate drags a hand over her face.  _Well, I went to Watson's Bay, fell in love with my instructor who then left me, then got posted on his ship, hooked up with him again, then when he couldn't commit, fell for another guy who then got blown up, then-_

"Kate?" Mackenzie prompts, snapping her out of these depressing thoughts.

"I... well, you know my story. I joined the Navy, got posted here."

"But why?" Mackenzie pushes. "I mean, why did you join the Navy?" When Kate doesn't answer, she clicks her tongue. "I don't mean to be pushy. It's just that I'm only here for a few days. Thought we might make the most of the time together. I just... I want to get to know you."

Kate blinks in confusion. "A few days?"

"Well, yeah." Mackenzie shrugs, stroking the kitten once more. "I've gotta get back to Mum. Once she's out of hospital, she'll need me. And probably other help around the house too. I know traumatic brain injuries can cause cognitive issues and-"

"Mackenzie-" Kate's voice is sterner than she'd planned, and the teenager flinches ever so slightly.

"Zee." She prompts darkly.

"Zee." Kate corrects, but the name feels weird on her tongue. More personal, but as though Kate hasn't quite earned the right to address her by a nickname. "It's... We should probably talk, shouldn't we? About Debbie?"

Zee shrugs. "No need. I've got it all figured out. There's this top neurosurgeon. I've got enough money in my bank account to pay for the appointment and I can work to pay for treatment. All I need is for you to talk to the hospital and fax some papers. You're Mum's next of kin, see?"

"I-" But Kate is cut off -  _saved -_ by a knock at the door, followed almost immediately by a cheery voice.

"It's Dutchy! I bring breakfast things!"

"Awesome." Mackenzie grins, moving quickly towards the door. "I'm starving."

Kate feels a twinge of guilt as she follows the girl – her  _sister_ – into the hallway where she's already greeting Dutchy. Of course Mackenzie would be starving; she'd been on her own for days in a strange city.

Dutchy holds up a shopping bag and grins at them both. "I have croissants, Turkish bread, bacon, eggs-"

"I do have food in my fridge, you know?" Kate quips, flashing him a wry smile as he deposits the bag on her benchtop.

"I just thought that Zee wouldn't be too keen on all the green furry stuff growing on them all." He quips, as Zee washes her hands and starts to unpack the bag. "I mean, I'm pretty sure the expiry for your bacon is in hieroglyphs, and-"

"Oh, piss off!" Kate cuts him off, although she too is struggling back laughter.

"And who is this little guy?" He asks, peering in confusion at the black kitten now wrapping himself around Mackenzie's legs.

"This is Malin." Mackenzie answers before Kate can.

 _Oh, God, she's named it._ Kate thinks, but at Dutchy's questioning look, she settles herself with simply rolling her eyes.

"Marlin?" Dutchy queries. "Don't tell me you're as sea-obsessed as your sister, here?"

Mackenzie shakes her head, rummaging through cupboards, evidently on the search for frypans. Mutely, Dutchy gestures to the correct cupboard. "Well, you seem very familiar with Kate's kitchen, here?" She smirks, turning the element on and waiting for it to heat up. "And, no, Malin. M-A-L-I-N. Named after Malin Matsdotter. She was one of the last women to be executed in Sweden during the witch hunts. She was accused by her own daughters, you know?" Mackenzie begins to lay slices of bacon into the frypan. "The council got so irate when she refused to confess, that they burned her alive. Usually they hanged first, then burned after death. You know she didn't scream?"

An odd silence fills the room, broken only by the steady hiss of bacon. "You're into witchcraft then?"

Mackenzie shrugs. "I did a project on Witch Trials in school. Found it fascinating." She catches Kate's gaze. "Don't worry, Sis. Not gonna  _put a curse on you._ " She says the last few words in a highly exaggerated manner, waving her fingers for good measure, before laughing and washing her hands. "Now, how does everyone like their eggs?"

Dutchy grins. "You know I came here with the intention to cook?"

Mackenzie shrugs again. "I love to cook. Besides, it's the least I can do to thank Kate for helping me and Mum out."

Kate feels a rock hit heavily in the pit of her stomach, and all happiness she had felt when Dutchy arrived vanishes. "I… I'm not too hungry. I need a shower."

Dutchy looks at her questioningly, but then nods, flashing another one of his winning smiles. "Sure. I did feel a little under-dressed for this pyjama party."

* * *

When Kate returns to the kitchen it's to see Mackenzie and Dutchy in full conversation, and Kate stills a moment just out of sight.

"…not much to do in town but I'm absolutely fascinated with Geology and of course, Coober's the place for that. But I can see why Kate chose the sea over it. The sea's never the same, is it?"

"No, it's not." Dutchy agrees, over the scraping of cutlery. "And you should see her in action. I mean, she's a tiny thing like you but I've seen her throw a drug dealer over her shoulder."

"She's so tough. I wish I was more like her."

"You don't seem so different to me." Dutchy pauses for a moment and then adds, "It seems like it would take a lot of guts to travel halfway across Australia to find someone you've never met."

 _That's how I should be talking to her,_ Kate thinks. Shouldn't sisters have an easy rapport? Shouldn't they be able to chat and talk with the ease in which Zee and Dutchy were?

Kate waits until the talking dies out before entering the kitchen. Dutchy looks up as she enters and flashes another of his winning smiles, gesturing to his empty plate. "Well, it seems Zee got the cooking skills of the McGregor household."

"I try!" Kate defends. "I can cook some fine, thank you very much!" She heads to the kitchen and begins gathering the necessary for making coffee.

" _Cooking_  isn't buying a Woolies chook and a Caesar salad." Kate only sneers in response and Dutchy grins. "So, what's the plan today? You have to show her around Cairns. Take her to every ice cream store on the Esplanade?"

"Sounds awesome!" Mackenzie grins. "But you should come too. I'm sure Kate would love that." She throws Kate an all-too-knowing look that tells Kate exactly why people always talk about  _annoying little sisters._

"If you want, Dutchy. But I've got duty watch at 1200 hours..." She trails off. "Either of you want a brew?"

"Ooh, that's a Navy word, isn't it?" Mackenzie squeals excitedly. "And twenty-four hour time? I'll be talking like a sailor in no time!"

Kate can't help but laugh at the excitement in Mackenzie's eyes. "So... yes? No?"

"Eww. No thanks. Coffee is gross." She wrinkles her nose for good measure.

"Ooh, that one didn't come from the gene pool." Dutchy laughs, and Kate glares. She wishes he'd stop talking about genetics. He flashes her a wink, as though he knows exactly what she's thinking. "Maybe I'll leave you two ladies to get to know each other. Zee, it's been a pleasure." Kate wants to call out, something like  _don't leave me,_ or  _I can't do this on my own,_ but instead she nods solemnly, even as she put on a brave face and waved Dutchy out of the house.

"He likes you." Mackenzie grins, the moment Dutchy's bike is out of view.

"What?" Kate repeats, even though she heard perfectly fine.

Zee smirks. "Oh, come on, Kate. He's totally into you. And. He. Is.  _Hot!_ "

Kate can't help but laugh at the look on Zee's face.  _Definitely an annoying little sister._  "Well," Kate begins, leading the way back into the house and up the stairs. "I guess if you're going to stay here, you need a proper room. I'll show you the spare room."


	4. Chapter 4

**C** **hapter Four**

"So you can't be a total nun? Surely there's  _someone_ in your life?" Mackenzie grins mischievously as she walks beside Kate along the Esplanade; Kate in denim shorts and a plan black t-shirt, Mackenzie in a short summer dress. Kate rolls her eyes at Mackenzie's words. She'd hoped that a mouthful of macadamia icecream would have been enough to shut Mackenzie up, but unfortunately not. After all, isn't that what you're supposed to do for kids? Buy them sweets to get a bit of peace? "You can't tell me you work on a boat full of hot sailors and haven't hooked up with any of them?" The teenager presses, but there's something about her eager gaze that brings a smile to Kate's face.

"You're incorrigible." Kate quips, taking a lick of her own ice cream; to her surprise, they both had the same favourite flavour. Under Mackenzie's pressing stare, Kate tips her head. "No, I'm not a nun."

"So?" One of Mackenzie's feet nudges Kate's lightly. "Details!"

For a moment Kate glances around her, as though expecting every crew member to be around, listening, with the Chief of Navy to boot. "Well, there was a guy. We were together for a few weeks. And then he left and I never saw him again until I was posted under him."

"Ooh, intrigue." Mackenzie giggles. "You get back together?"

"For a little… a few times."

"Ooh. Several one-night-stands, then." She smirks.

"You… you're thirteen!"

"Hate to break it to you, but Mum gave me the sex talk  _looooong_ ago." She grins, swiping at a drip trailing down her fist before her face turns solemn. "But I take it that didn't work out?"

Kate busies herself with peering around the streets. "Well, when you're both on different ships and barely see each other, it's hard to keep anything going. And I was still…" She trails off, her mood instantly darkening.

"Still what?" Mackenzie prompts.

"I was… mourning someone. Someone special to me." Kate is tentative in her words, but then shakes her head sadly. "You feel like walking to the Naval base for my shift then?"

Mercifully, Mackenzie doesn't fight the obvious change of subject, but nods simply. "Lead the way. Hey, what's that?" She points down the street where several small water jets are visible spraying water into the air.

"It's the lagoon." Kate answers simply, and when Mackenzie looks puzzled she shrugs. "Come on, we've got time. Come look."

As they walk closer, Mackenzie soon gasps. "It's just… like… a swimming pool? For everyone?"

"Yeah." Kate nods. "The council is pretty good like that. Actually, if we walk along here, you'll see. There's heaps of parks and stuff. You can have a swim later tonight if you want. I'll bring you back here."

"I don't have a cossie."

"Well, we can go to Kmart or something after if you want. They always have bathers. I'll buy you a set." When Mackenzie simply turns to blink at Kate, she feels slightly unnerved. "What's wrong?"

"I've just… never heard anyone but Mum call them 'bathers' before." Mackenzie gives a sad little smile. "I used to tease her about that stuff. She was always reverting back to different things like that. 'Crisps' and 'hoover' and all that. But it used to make me laugh."

Neither of them say any more on the subject as they walk the boardwalk, Mackenzie showing great interest in the large tree house and insisting that Kate go to the top with her as well. By the time they reach the Naval base and Kate has signed in with Port Security, Mackenzie is jabbering away about how beautiful Cairns is.

"You haven't even seen the reefs yet." Kate quips neatly, saluting the ensign and leading her through the maze towards her cabin. "I just need to change into my DPNUs. I'll just be a sec."

While Mackenzie busies herself exploring the Senior Mess ("It's so tiny this is insane!"), Kate quickly dresses, loathe to leave the excitable teenager unattended for too long. By the time she has relocated Mackenzie ("I was just taking a peek into the other rooms"), Kate has barely three minutes to lead her to the bridge. Thankfully, 2Dads says nothing about her lateness, smiling good-naturedly in her direction.

"Hey, Boss!" 2Dads greets cheekily, before frowning slightly in wonder. "And… it's a mini-boss?" Kate glances at Mackenzie, who is jumping around in a way that Kate certainly never did.

"You didn't tell me you were the boss!" Mackenzie cries in excitement, rushing up to the console and running a hand over the Captain's chair.

"Surprise?" Kate murmurs lamely, in response to both statements. "Mackenzie, please don't touch any buttons. Uh, 2Dads, this is my s-sister Mackenzie. Mackenzie, this is 2Dads." She's glad she manages to get through the introductions without stuttering too much, but Mackenzie is still rushing around in a sugar frenzy so intense that most of their attentions are on her rather than Kate's syntax.

Mackenzie waves a hand in 2Dads' direction. "Urgh. Zee, please. And '2Dads'? Is there a story in that name? Or..." She glances at the name tag on his DPNUs. "...is it just because you've got two last names?"

"The latter, unfortunately. But I could probably make up a cool story to go with the former if you like?"

"Awesome!" Mackenzie's grin widens. "I love stories. And hey, I bet you've got lots of stories about Kate too."

"Don't you dare!" Kate calls out, looking up from the paperwork she'd busied herself in. "Should have known I was crazy to bring you two chatterboxes together."

2Dads flashes his winning smile. "Could've been worse, Boss." He grins. "Imagine Bird." Kate lets out a groan. Just the thought of a conversation between the two of them was enough to give her a headache. 2Dads smirks and turns back to Mackenzie. "And as for your question, yes, I do. But as she's my boss, I'll have to wait until she's gone before I tell them."

"Anything bad and you're on bilge scrubbing duties for a week." Kate quips without looking up.

Once more, 2Dads smirks. "Okay." He nods. "I will absolutely  _not_ tell her about the time you commanded a mutiny."

At the wide-eyed look of admiration from Mackenzie, Kate ducks her head once more. "You weren't even there for that." She mutters darkly. "Croc thief."

"Child hostage retriever."

"UFO spotter."

"Cyanide gargling."

"Whoa!" Kate cuts off.

2Dads tips his head. "Too far?"

Kate grins, holding her fingers until they are nearly touching. "You're lucky I'm in a good mood."

He nods, peering between the two of them, and it's such a serious look, so rare to see on 2Dads' face. It makes him look older, wiser, and although Kate feels as though she is being x-rayed, it's not unwelcome. Finally, he says, "I can see the similarities between the two of you."

Kate doesn't know what to say, but Zee says, "Thanks," in a heartbeat, taking the statement as a compliment so easily that it stuns Kate. "So, tell me all about the Navy!"

* * *

"I've never had a double bed before." Mackenzie grins, doing a little bounce as she sits snugly on the bed. "I am going to starfish out tonight!" She stretches her arms out to the side, before peering at Kate in the doorway. "Hey, Kate…"

"Yeah?" Kate takes a tentative step forwards, never having experienced the true feeling of being a stranger in her own house until now. But right now, Mackenzie is such an unknown entity that it's as if she's trespassing on private land.

Mackenzie waits until she's slowed before murmuring, "What did happen with you and Mum? I mean, what was so bad that you don't even talk?"

This is the question that she's been dreading, ever since Mackenzie rolled into her life – how could it have been only 24 hours ago? But no, this dread has gone on for longer, haunting her sleepless nights and shadowing every relationship she's ever formed. "It's complicated." Kate begins, and despite her earlier hesitancy she moves forwards and perches on the edge of the bed.

"How?" Mackenzie presses, and there's something akin to desperation in her eyes. "Why is it adults say that all the time. What can be so complicated that you won't even speak about her?"

"Because... because she was different. She… she was selfish. She was cruel and stupid and she… look, maybe she changed. I… I hope she did. For your sake." Kate exhales sharply, and she longs to get away, to hide herself, this scared little girl in a woman's body. Already, she's backing away. "I'm not ready. I will tell you. One day. But… I can't tonight."

* * *

When Kate awakens to screams, she remembers instantly that she is not alone in the house. For a moment she is frozen in her bed, imagining horrific things, burglars or murderers or evil, evil people. Another scream rips apart the air and Kate feels it chill her blood.  _Mackenzie._ Throwing her sheets off, she rushes across the hall, toes curling into the carpet to grip as she skids. When she pushes open the door all she sees is Mackenzie, illuminated by the moonlight, thrashing against her sheets and screaming in terror.

In an instant, Kate is there, one hand freeing her sister from the confines of her sheets and the other shaking her roughly on the shoulder. "Mackenzie! Zee! Hon, wake up! It's just a dream. You're okay. Come on." She removes her hand from the sheet and swipes impatiently at the messy wave of hair obscuring her vision. "Come on, Zee. It's okay. I'm here. Wake up."

There's a gasp, like the first breath of the near-drowned, and then Mackenzie jerks bolt upright, only missing Kate's head as she leapt back just in time.

"Mum!" Mackenzie cries out, before her face crumples and she begins to sob. And in that moment, she's not a teenager, but a small child, scared and lonely.

"It's okay." Kate whispers, kneeling on the bed next to Mackenzie. She hesitates for only a moment before wrapping Mackenzie into a hug, and although it's the most awkward first sisterly hug in the history of the world, it's the only thing Kate can think to do. "It's okay, Sweetie. It was just a dream."

"It - wasn't!" Mackenzie shudders in between frantic sobs. "I shouldn't - have - left her! She's – gotta – be – so – scared."

Kate loses her to a fresh wave of tears. She has no clue what to do, has never been responsible for the comfort of anyone and she has no way to fix this situation. She can't keep whispering  _it's okay_ because it's not and all she can do is sit here and rub circles on Mackenzie's back like it's going to bring their mother back.

It takes Kate back to sleepless nights crying into her pillow.

It takes her back to her mother.

It's a long time before Mackenzie's sobs turn to hiccups, and several more minutes before pulls her face from Kate's shoulder, swiping at her face with the hem of her shirt. "S-sorry." She chatters.

"It's okay." Kate whispers, keeping one arm around Mackenzie's shoulder. "I… I don't think I could ever be as brave as you, Zee. And you've been through so much, Hon. It's okay to be upset."

"I just made a total f-f-fool of myself."

Kate grins in the semi-darkness. "Eh, what are sisters for, hey?" Mackenzie lets out a watery sort of chuckle."Between you and me, I've had my fair share of emotional freakouts. And none of them were ever over anything as stressful as this."

"Will you come with me? Just to see her? To tell her?" Mackenzie sniffs. "In the car, all she kept saying was… was  _come back, Katie. I'm sorry. Forgive me._ I… I think it might help, if you were there. Just for a little bit. And… and I don't want to go back alone. I'm… I'm scared."

It would take a lot to go back to the place she had left and sworn she would never return to, let alone to that same person. But as Kate thinks of Zee, she finds herself nodding resolutely. "I'll call NAVCOM in the morning and get some leave. And… and I'll be with you."

"Thank you." Mackenzie's voice is little more than a whisper. "Will you stay with me tonight? Please?"

Kate nods, releasing Mackenzie so that she can lie back down. "Budge over, Sis." And as Mackenzie's eyes close and her breathing evens out, a slight pressure against her leg and a soft purring tell her that the damn cat is nestled in between them.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

If she's honest with herself, part of Kate is hoping that Maxine will knock back her leave form. But of course, Maxine has been badgering her for years to take a break, and with rumours fast flowing around NAVCOM about Lieutenant Commander McGregor's long lost sister, Maxine was already half-expecting that Kate would take leave for some sort of family emergency.

"Take as much time as you need. I have Hammersley in port and this would be a great time for everyone to get some extended shore leave as I have marine techs go over that enormous list of maintenance courtesy of your Charge. And if need be, I have several suitable temporary COs ready to go." Kate wonders darkly where all these suitable CO replacements are coming from when they were in such slim demand two years ago, but says nothing against Maxine's words, instead nodding and thanking her.

Zee is near-inseparable from Malin, who, thanks to Zee's ministrations, is no longer a skinny stinky-kitty, but a gorgeous kitten with luscious silky fur. The transformation in such a short time is incredible to Kate, who has long since given up any protest about him being in the house, and has simply resolved to close her bedroom door at all times, lest she find black fur all over her pillow.

Malin had presented with a small complication, however, as Kate still had no idea how she was supposed to care for a cat when she was away during long periods of time. Nikki may have been able to sneak a clownfish past customs, but there was no way a frolicking kitten would be allowed past port security. However, she had says nothing to shatter Mackenzie's carefree notions as Zee teaches her how to feed, bathe, treat for fleas and generally care for a growing kitten. (Although when she mentions that Malin might want a friend, Kate puts her foot down)

But as much as she's come to resign herself (never accept) to the fact that she now apparently owns a kitten, it's still a scene of embarrassment to her as she knocks on Dutchy's door with her spare key. She's left Zee at a pop culture store, where the teenager has found fascination in an ongoing Dungeons and Dragons game, and had headed straight over.

"Hey." Dutchy greets, holding the door open for her to enter. "I hear you're on holiday. And you've nabbed us some guaranteed leave."

She forces a smile as she perches on the edge of his armchair. "Yeah, I'm… I'm going back to Coober." It's the first time she's properly said the words. "If you'd told me forty-eight hours ago…" She trails off, not bothering to finish the thought aloud. "I… actually have a favour to ask."

Dutchy hums in curiosity. "Sure. What's up?"

"Can you watch my cat?"

There's a beat, and then Dutchy screws up his face. "Are you hitting on me again?  _Ouch!_ " Kate's hand reaches across to whack him in the chest. "Ow! Assault of a fellow officer!" He chuckles. "Am I to take it that you've adopted the Witch-Cat?"

"Apparently." Kate sighs, tossing her spare key at him. "Don't go snooping."

He tips her an enormous wink. "Oh, I make no promises, Crazy Cat Lady."

* * *

Zee sleeps for most of the flight, her head lolling against Kate's shoulder as she lets out the occasional snuffle in her sleep. When she is awake, she is uncharacteristically quiet, her hands twisting and feet tapping. By the time they've landed in Adelaide and changed to fly to Coober, Kate too is twisting her hands together.

"I've never flown before." Zee admits to Kate as they reach the airport, Mackenzie still kneading her knuckles into her eyes and yawning. "Wiped me out."

"How'd you get to Cairns before?" Kate frowns, as they head towards the car rental. Mackenzie gives a shifty look that causes Kate to widen her eyes and stop dead in the middle of the footpath. Several grumbling pedestrians overtake them, muttering darkly. But Kate only has eyes for her sister. "You hitchhiked?!"

"Only for bits of it. I caught buses too." Kate holds back the lecture on her tongue; she's sure Mackenzie already knows everything that she's about to say anyway. Instead, she leads the way into the car rental yard, and fifteen minutes later Kate is driving down streets she hasn't seen for decades. The dusty air blows through their hair as Kate travels back to her childhood home, passing the school that Kate used to attend, and the pub that Debbie would frequent. By the time that they have reached the old house, Kate feels she might just have gone back in time.

"It hasn't changed much." She muses as she takes in the dusty front yard. The old fibro house is still standing on what is essentially dry dirt, with a rusty trampoline in front of the bedroom window that was already breaking when Kate was a child and now sagged so much that it touched the ground in places, more a moth-eaten hammock than anything else. There are no gardens or flowers. Only a few lone trees here and there, unmoving in the still, dry air. In the driveway sits a rusted old Holden, cobwebs and leaves under the chassis showing that it hasn't moved in months. "Hey, I learned to drive in that."

"No way." Mackenzie laughs. "Mum used to say that car was her baby."

"Yeah, she used to say that to me, too." Kate muses sadly.

For a moment they both stand and stare at the car, as though it holds the answers they are so desperately seeking. And then Zee leads the way into the house, Kate following close behind, still in disbelief at how little the place has changed.

Inside the house, the air is stuffy, but the dark, boarded up windows ensure that it at least cooler than outside. Almost instantly, there's a soft mewling and yowling, and Kate just catches a glimpse of several cats darting past her legs. While Mackenzie crouches down, greeting her furry friends, Kate continues to walk.

Instinctively, Kate makes the way down the hall to what used to be her bedroom, only to see it very different to how she had left it. On the bookshelf where her novels and textbooks had sat, were several thick volumes on mythology. Where Kate had once slept under a raggedy orange blanket, there now lay a bright doona cover patterned like a sunrise. There's even an orange shaggy rug covering the spot where Kate had once spilled nail polish on the carpet.

"Oh." Zee catches up to her, peering around. "I guess… this was your room, wasn't it?" It's scary how easily her mother has removed any trace of Kate's presence. Eight years living in this bedroom, wiped away like it was nothing. But it's not the material possessions that Kate is feeling the most. It's the fact that Kate had never had all the sentimental touches that their mother had obviously seen fit to give to Mackenzie. Pictures of the two of them, from birth to what seems like recent years, all smiling and happy as though…

As though Debbie could actually be a mother.

Just not to Kate.

"Force of habit." Kate manages to say finally, forcing a smile. "I can sleep-" The only lounge is the same filthy armchair that had resided in the house when Kate was a child. Debbie had kept the house the same, all except Mackenzie, who got the best she could give. "I'll sleep in the car. It's fine."

"Have Mum's bed. I'll put fresh sheets on. It's cool. Mum won't mind."

Kate has barely wrapped her head around sleeping in her mother's bed when a photograph on the wall catches her eye. Debbie, not much older than the last time Kate had seen her, next to a rough-looking man, swinging who she takes to be a toddler-Mackenzie off his arms. "Your father's Max." Kate says without thinking, staring into the eyes nearly hidden with hair.

Mackenzie stops. "Yeah! You knew him?"

"We met." Kate says, her gaze fixed on the picture. The three of them looked so happy. "Do you… do you see him?"

Mackenzie shakes her head. "I don't even know where he is now. He sort of travels all around. I get a birthday card from him every year though. Always a different location. But mostly it's been me and Mum." She scratches absent-mindedly at a spot on her chin. "Hey, can we go see Mum? I know we've been travelling for ages but she's only in the hospital a few blocks away."

For the first time, this strikes Kate as odd, and it's this that draws her away from the picture. "They didn't transfer her to Adelaide or anything?"

Mackenzie shakes her head. "Well, they sort of thought… they were saying it wasn't worth it. Plus we've got a pretty decent critical care unit now. And anyway, they need an adult to consent to transfer and I don't count."

Kate can do nothing but nod. After all, this is what she'd come here for, wasn't it?

* * *

As she walks down the hall, she wonders how the years will have twisted what her mother once was. She's not quite sure what she's expecting; something between Harpy and Zombie, probably. But as they enter the hospital and Zee leads the way to the very small CCU, she recognises her mother immediately. Debbie looks more or less the same as when Kate had last seen her, although her skin had sagged, and her hair is now streaked with grey. The only major difference that Kate can see is the mass of bandages and stitches all over her face.

Mackenzie slides confidently into the seat next to the bed, but Kate stands frozen, fully struck for the first time with the realisation that her mother, her  _mother,_ is going to die.

"Mum, it's Kate. She's come back to see you, Mum." Mackenzie turns to Kate, beckoning her closer. "Kate, come here. She'll want to hear your voice."

Her mother is an empty shell. Her mother is gone.

"Come on!" Mackenzie prompts, and Kate obliges. She's so very conscious of Mackenzie's expectant gaze. And what is there to say, really? What do you say to someone after all of their shared history? Not to mention someone who has no idea she's even there.

_If you leave now, don't bother coming back!_

"You... you can talk to her." Mackenzie murmurs. But Kate still has no idea what to say.  _Hi, it's Kate. Remember that time you told me to leave and never come back? Or that time you puked all over my classroom at my year six graduation? Fun times!_

"Miss McGregor?" Kate looks up to see a doctor peering in at the scene, and it's almost as if an angel has sent the woman to save her from this impossible situation. "Pardon my intrusion," She begins, flicking her long plait over her shoulder, "but I wonder if I might have a quick word with you?" Kate leaps to her feet before the doctor has even finished her sentence, flashing a reassuring smile back at Mackenzie that is completely fake. "Be back soon." Kate promises, feeling as though she's just escaped execution.

The doctor leads her into a small office and takes a seat behind the desk, gesturing towards a chair for Kate to take. She obliges, noting as she does that a box of tissues sits between them. "I'm Doctor Jean Knight, head of the CCU here. And I wonder if I could have a word about Deborah McGregor's prognosis. I am unsure as to what your sister may have told you but-"

"She's not going to wake up, is she?" Kate cuts in numbly. Doctor Knight blinks, looking taken aback, but Kate shakes her head. "You don't need to sugarcoat it for me. Just... I need it straight."

It takes a moment for the doctor to process her words. And then she bows her head. "Then you should know that the odds of her recovering are slim to none."

Kate nods slowly. The information was not a shock to her, but she has to be sure. "And nothing that anyone can do will change that? Not even if we had all the money in the world and the best resources?"

Doctor Knight shakes her head sadly, nudging the tissue box closer to Kate. And for a moment, Kate wishes that she could cry, fall apart, so that this woman wouldn't think her a total monster. "I'm afraid it wouldn't make a difference. Whatever parts of her are... Deborah... I'm afraid they're gone." She nudges the tissue box closer still, with such an inquisitive stare that it almost feels like a test. "I'm so very sorry."

But it's not the loss of her mother. It's... "And you want to take her off life support?" She needs all the facts. She needs to know she's doing the right thing. She needs...

"Right now," Doctor Knight begins slowly, "the machines are the only thing keeping her alive."

Kate drags a hand over her face, before turning to the doctor in a complete loss. "How am I going to tell Mackenzie?"


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

When Kate returns to the hospital room, Mackenzie is jabbering away about Malin. In another situation, Kate might have found amusement in the fact that Mackenzie seemed able to have a conversation with anyone, regardless of their cognition. But this is reality, and the cold, hard truth ringing in her ears is enough to smother any happiness inside her. "Just wait til you see him, Mum! He's got the most gorgeous blue eyes. And the sweetest nature..." For a moment, Kate pauses on the threshold, leaning against the doorjam. She knows it's impossible for Mackenzie to remain so carefree for ever, but surely one more minute wouldn't hurt.

One more minute. Or two. Or three.

Kate can't bring herself to destroy the last shred of hope. Maybe she'll go and get a coffee, give Mackenzie and Debbie those last few moments before...

Kate's phone slips from her grasp and clatters noisily against the linoleum.

"Hey!" Mackenzie grins as she sees Kate. It's the smile of innocence, of hope and trust. And Kate is about to rip it all apart. "Did you figure out the transfer papers and everything? I was just telling Mum about Cairns. I reckon once she's on the mend, maybe we could go there and meet up with you."

"Mackenzie-" She can't listen to this, plans of a life that will never happen.

"Because she's really going to be in need of a holiday and-"

"Mackenzie!" Kate calls out again, louder than she'd intended, causing the teenager to flinch. "I need to talk to you. About Deb- about Mum."

"What about her?" The innocence in her voice is like a knife to Kate's heart. It's unbearable to her that Mackenzie has put so much trust in Kate, effectively a stranger, and now she is going to destroy that, destroy  _her._

"Zee…" Kate has no idea how to start the conversation, but in that moment, Mackenzie seems to understand. She leaps to her feet, eyes wide and fearful as she spreads her arms out, as though trying to shield the bedridden woman from a knife-wielding maniac or something. "You're giving up on her."

It isn't a question. It's an accusation, and Kate can't deny it. Is there a way to soften this? Kate fights the panic fighting its way up her throat and tries again. "I spoke with the doctors-"

No!" Mackenzie snaps, and her hands actually clap over her ears. "No! Get out!"

"Mackenzie, please. Just listen-"

But it seems that Mackenzie is beyond reason. Her hands grapple with the air in front of her, as though the solution she is seeking is a tangible force. "I brought you here to save her!" Zee swipes angrily at her face, mopping up her tears with a sleeve.

"She can't be saved." Kate's voice cracks as she reaches out, desperately needing Mackenzie to know how sorry she is that it has come to this. But Mackenzie shakes her head, her hair whipping backwards and forwards as though in a strong wind. "Zee-"

"No! No!" She takes another step backwards, one hand reaching blindly behind her to rest on Debbie, the other jabbing furiously in Kate's direction. "It's because you hate her, isn't it? And now you're so angry you're going to kill your own mother!"

"Mackenzie-"

But tears are falling thick and fast down Zee's face as she grapples with Kate's hand, actually begging. "Please don't! Please! Please!"

Kate looks up into her sister's tear stained face and shakes her head sadly, wishing that she could give another answer. "It's already done, Sweetie."

Mackenzie turns back to her mother, shaking all over. "I hate you, Kate." She whispers. "I wish I'd never found you."

* * *

Kate is calm until Dutchy answers the phone. And then she drops to the ground, loud sobs rendering her inaudible. And even though she can hear Dutchy's voice comforting her, it seems only to make things worse. She's so far away from everyone who cares about her.

By the time she's calmed down enough to register Dutchy's words, she feels as though she's run out of tears to cry, but when she tries to fill Dutchy in, her words are just as disjointed as her emotions. "She's not going to wake - and being back here - and Zee - the stupid room - she's gone - have to - and when I told her - she  _hates me_ \- like I was going to attack her."

" _She knows you wouldn't hurt her."_

"I don't think she does." Kate gasps, drawing her knees up to her chest and leaning against the exterior wall. "The way she looked at me, Dutchy."

There's silence at the end of the line for a moment, and then Dutchy swallows. " _When are they… you know… removing life support?"_

Kate inhales sharply, before glancing at her watch for no clear reason other than it's something to do. "Tomorrow morning." Has she put a death sentence on her mother? And if she's so sure it's the right choice, then why is she waiting?

" _Kate, there is no right answer here. And I wish I could tell you what you need to do. But the truth is I don't know. I think the only thing you can do is be there for Mackenzie."_ There's a soft scratching, and Kate can picture Dutchy running his fingers through his hair. _"She'll understand. Not today. But she will."_

* * *

Mackenzie walks from the hospital, refusing to get in the car, no matter how many times Kate begs. In the end, Kate drives the car at a crawling pace several metres behind Mackenzie, keeping watch over her through eyes so increasingly watery it's probably a good thing she's not driving over five k's.

She half expects Mackenzie to lock her out of the house, but when she pulls the door handle she finds that she can get in, and tentatively enters the gloom inside. With the windows boarded up and the sun long past setting outside, it's near pitch black, but years of moving in the dark have given Kate an almost perfect mental image of every twist, turn and divot, and she's able to find her way to her old bedroom without any complications.

"Mackenzie, we need to talk." Although she can't see her, Kate knows she's in here, and an intake of breath proves her right. She can tell that Mackenzie had expected to be left alone, and for a moment Kate wonders if that would not have been a better idea, but a moment later she shakes off the thought. This was important. "You think… you think that this was something that I wanted to do. That it was easy for me. But you're wrong. She… she wouldn't want to be kept like this."

"You don't know what she'd want." The bedside lamp snaps on all of a sudden, causing Kate to flinch. Mackenzie is red-eyed, but fury still burns across her face. "You don't know because you weren't there. Every chance you ever got, you gave up on her."

Her throat is dry. She needs to be somewhere else. "You… it's more complicated than that."

"Why are you here? Just go put a knife in her neck. It might make you feel better." Mackenzie jabs a finger in Kate's direction. "You just took off and broke her!"

"It's not like that." Kate mumbles.

"No?" Zee challenges. "You left to punish her!" The words stir up every angry thought that has filled her since arriving back in this town. Or maybe even earlier. Maybe this pain in her stomach is the weight of every single thing Kate had never said to Debbie.

"I left to survive!" She shouts back. "You don't know what you're talking about, Mackenzie!"

Mackenzie lets out a wry laugh. "Oh, so why don't you tell me the whole sad tale? Why don't you tell me  _something_!"

Kate takes a step closer, fury now flooding through her too like white hot flame. "And what exactly do you want to know, huh? You want to know what it smells like when she pukes after a four day bender? You want to know what it feels like to resuscitate your own mother? Or to wonder whether your life would be better if you didn't? You want to talk about her stealing my money so that she could buy booze, or having to carry her home from the pub at four in the morning?" Now Kate is the one that's shouting. "You want to know what it's like to be nine years old, and woken in the middle of the night and told to pack a bag? To find yourself on the other side of the world, and to never see your father again? Or maybe you'd like to talk about  _your_  father? You want to know what it feels like when he starts to beat the shit out of you?"

"You're a liar!" Mackenzie explodes, but Kate jabs a hand in the direction of the hallway.

"Right in that kitchen! In my home! Your asshole father broke three of my ribs! And your  _hero_  mother just sat there in a drunken stupor and watched." Kate took another step forward. "And you know what the real kicker is? Not that Mum seemed to care for you in a way that she never could be bothered to for me. It's that despite all of this, I still came back to this shithole town hoping that by some miracle we could both get our mother back!" Kate can feel her whole body shaking, but the anger is fading as quick as it had come, and her voice turns to a plead. "She's gone, Mackenzie! She died the minute your car rolled! And no amount of money or treatment or wishing is going to bring her back!" Kate takes a step forwards, and when Mackenzie doesn't shout her away, she perches on the edge of the bed, one hand on Mackenzie's shoulder. She takes it as a good sign when Mackenzie doesn't throw Kate's hand off. "I wish it wasn't the case, Mackenzie. But I made the decision to take her off life support. Not because I hate her, but because I've seen her trapped by alcoholism for years, and I love you too much to see you trapped by her death."

Mackenzie gulps. For a moment it seems she is going to shout back. Then she whispers softly, "She never drinks. Never. I remember… Dad used to smell of beer and she… she left him."

"Yeah, well… I'm glad. I'm glad she changed. I'm glad he didn't…" Kate trails off. She has no idea how to end the sentence anyway.  _I'm glad he didn't beat you?_

"She loved you, you know?" Mackenzie whispers softly, and it strikes Kate that she's talking of their mother in past tense for the first time. "Will it hurt her?"

"No." Kate promises. "She won't feel a thing, Sweetie."

Mackenzie nods, absorbing the information. "I want to be there." She whispers. "I need to be there. She... I don't want her to be alone."

"She won't be." Kate assures her, smoothing down Mackenzie's hair. "And I'll be there too, if you'll let me."

"And after?" Mackenzie murmurs with all the childlike naivety of her age. And it strikes Kate now that, despite Mackenzie's wisdom and knowledge, she  _was,_ after all, just a teenager. "Where do I go? Dad isn't… I can't…" Her hand scrabbles, twisting the doona cover into circles.

"If you want it," Kate takes a deep breath, "then there's always a home with me. And Malin."

Mackenzie doesn't say anything, but as the two sisters turn to look at each other, they don't need words.

* * *

Kate doesn't cry when she enters the room. Not when she signs the paperwork. Not when she presses a kiss to the top of her mother's head and whispers goodbye. Not until Mackenzie hugs Debbie like one would hug a buoy in the middle of the ocean. And as nameless, faceless individuals bustle around them, and Debbie's favourite song plays on the stereo they'd brought in, Mackenzie whispers non-stop about her favourite times. She speaks of building forts inside during thunderstorms, and endless tea parties. She speaks of hunting for treasure in the ground outside, and taking in stray animals, and  _I love you Mum, I love you so much._

There is no dramatic last moment. No widening of the eyes, or sudden moment of lucidity. Deborah Elizabeth McGregor takes her last breath at 9:22am. Or maybe that isn't right. Some would say that she took her last breath as she exhaled at the point of unconsciousness, pinned between her seat and the steering wheel that wouldn't turn sharply enough.

"You're free now." Mackenzie whispers, her whole body shaking as she falls into Kate's arms. "You're free. It's okay."

Mackenzie leaves first, leaving Kate alone with the shell of what was once her mother. And as Kate takes it all in, she feels tears trickling down her face. "I forgive you, Mum." She whispers. "And I'll look after her."

And then she leaves to join her sister.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

Kate has never planned a funeral before. The responsibility of Jim's memorial fell to his parents, while Kate had taken a seat at the back and stared into the large picture of the man she had loved.

But here, it is her responsibility, and there is so much to organise; flowers, food, notices, not to mention the readings and speeches and the million other things that are on her suddenly immense to-do list.

Mackenzie agrees to do the eulogy. It doesn't seem right for Kate to do it, hypocritical to speak great things of someone when she can barely remember them. Of course, she knows that she must have had good times with her mother, and even hearing some of Mackenzie's stories brings up distant memories of playground swings and chip sandwiches, but for the most part, the pain and bad times have distorted the good.

So Kate busies herself with the practicalities, leaving the emotions up to Mackenzie. There is paperwork to be signed (even more than on a patrol boat, it seems) and things to be packed away. Most of her mother's possessions, she puts into boxes to be stored until Mackenzie is old enough to sort through it, but her clothes, all but a few pieces of Mackenzie's choice, go to charity.

She's in a town full of well-wishers, and they soon have a fridge full of stews and soups and casseroles and cakes which neither of them have any hope of getting through. She grows sick of strangers knocking at the door, all with some long winded speech about how great a woman Debbie was. After a while Kate considers initiating a drinking game whenever someone says the word  _tragedy_ to her, but on the whole decides against adding ongoing liver failure to her list of problems. For the most part, Mackenzie takes the courtesy calls, but even hearing the voices has Kate wishing that everyone would simply leave them alone.

So two nights after their mother's passing, when a knock sounds at the door once more, Kate is all for turning out the lights and hiding, but instead, she abandons the shoebox she's just unearthed from underneath Debbie's bed, and heads to answer the door.

"Dutchy?" For a moment Kate is sure that she's mistaken, but as she pushes open the screen door and recognises his car in the driveway, she can't help but grin. "What are you doing here?"

Dutchy grins sheepishly. "Well, after you called, I figured you could use a friend. Couldn't get a flight so…" He gestures lamely to the car in the driveway. "Would've been here sooner, but it seems Malin isn't a fan of the car. Hoping to change his mind over the six pack in the car." Kate feels herself laugh hysterically for the first time in days as she sees that Dutchy is holding a cat travel box.

"You're…"

"Devastatingly handsome? God's gift to the world?" He quips.

"An idiot." Kate finishes. "And the best friend I could as for." She holds the door open. "Come in."

* * *

"When's the funeral?" Dutchy asks, taking a swig of his beer. Kate glances behind her, but Mackenzie is quite occupied with introducing Malin to the four cats here (Kate has already forgotten their names.)

"Two days." Kate murmurs, taking a swig of her own. She wasn't normally a huge beer drinker but the liquid is comforting tonight. "Most of it's organised. I'm just hunting for pictures and trying to find a nice dress for her. Most of the personal stuff, Mackenzie is taking care of. Until then I'm just…" She gestures lamely around her. "Trying to get this place sorted. Putting things into storage and all that. Mackenzie said she… she didn't want to. I'm just trying to keep some sentimental stuff for her. It's just hard knowing what…"

"I'll give you a hand." Dutchy half-rises from his chair, demonstrating his willingness for immediate action. Kate rests a hand on his forearm, pushing him back.

"Please, you've just driven for two days straight. You're entitled to a rest. Although…" She trails off. Against her better will, she'd been bullied into taking the main bedroom, but there was no spare bed.

Dutchy seems to know what she's thinking. "I knew space would be tight, so there's a swag in the boot. I'll just pull up a spare bit of dirt."

Kate glances over her shoulder. "Those bloody cats will lick you to death." She quips, then feels a twinge of guilt.  _Death._ "We can share the bed if you want." Dutchy waggles on his eyebrows, and Kate raises a finger to stall him. "And if you mention once more anything to do with me hitting on you…"

He smirks but, wisely in Kate's opinion, says nothing more on the subject. "Well, I'm here to help. And hopped up on coffee and energy drinks, so while I'm here, I intend to help. So just show me what I can do."

Resigned to his stubbornness, but glad for the help all the same, she leads the way into the main bedroom which is in complete disarray. "I'm just going through her drawers now but maybe if you want to bag up her shoes and I'll drop them into the church charity bin tomorrow?"

"You don't want anything kept?"

Kate shakes her head. "Not my style."

There's a soft knock on the door and Kate looks up to see Mackenzie, slightly red-eyed but smiling. "I think I want to help." She murmurs, looking around. "I can't promise I'll be any good with it, but…" She hesitates. "And I think we should sell the house. I know you were talking about renting it out but I… I don't think I could ever come back here to live full time. Not without Mum." She sniffs, and Kate steps forward, but Mackenzie seems to recover. "I'm okay." She whispers. "Just sad." She sniffs and tugs out one of Debbie's bedside drawers.

Kate and Dutchy exchange looks, but Kate merely nods and they both return mutely to their tasks. By nine o'clock, the clothing, shoes and bedside drawers are all emptied (Kate snatches a box of condoms away before Mackenzie can see them, flinging them wildly across the room much to Dutchy's amusement), and Mackenzie yawns widely. "Well, I'm off to bed." Mackenzie murmurs softly.

"Night." Kate and Dutchy call in unison.

Mackenzie makes to walk out of the room, and then doubles back. "Oh, and don't do anything I wouldn't do! Remember, there are impressionable children in the house." Mackenzie says, with a hint of her usual smile. "Even if there's a box of condoms you think I didn't see in Mum's drawer that are now hidden under the bed."

"Gee, thanks." Kate grins, as Dutchy dissolves into laughter.

* * *

Much later, Kate shifts restlessly in the bed, mind racing. She was exhausted, physically and mentally, but it seemed that every time she closed her eyes, memories of the last few days press at her brain.

"You right?" Dutchy whispers beside her, quiet enough that if she had been asleep, it wouldn't have woken her, but loud enough to be audible.

"Didn't happen to bring any vodka along with your beer, did you?" Kate whispers back. "Or wine? Cooking sherry?"

"That kind of a night?" Dutchy presses. Kate hums in affirmation but says no more. Dutchy sniffs. "Is it just my imagination or..."

"No, everything smells like cats." Kate answers, huffing in frustration. "You know, when I was a kid my mother would never have considered bringing any animals in. I asked for a dog once and she told me I was already enough to feed."

Dutchy winces. "She changed."

"Just not for me." Kate twitches her leg angrily. "Which means that she was always capable of change. The only problem was me."

"No."

"It's the only variable."

"Not time, or circumstance?"

"Do you really believe people change out of nowhere?" Kate tugs the sheet up higher. "If Mum hadn't have had Mackenzie, she'd still be the same alcoholic wreck."

"Maybe." Dutchy murmurs. "But I do believe in change. I mean, look at you and me. We hated each other when we first met." Kate clears her throat pointedly, and Dutchy hastens to correct himself. "Alright, I hated you. Or… not you. Just… how vulnerable you looked. Whatever. And now look at us. A court martial waiting to happen."

Kate snickers. "Well, you're not wrong there." She turns to face him, even though it's way too dark to see anything. "Thanks for being here."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

"Unbelievable." Kate murmurs distractedly, perched on tiptoe to tug a large plastic box from the top of the laundry cupboard. By now, Kate has finished clearing out her mother's room, and has even braved emptying the fridge (Dutchy had thought Kate's fridge was bad) and has just started on the laundry, which was apparently still the junk room. The cupboards were crammed with punctured inflatable lilos, mismatched gumboots, shopping bags stuffed into yet more shopping bags, pegs, bags, coat hangers and Christmas decorations. Kate has no idea where to even start, but taking Dutchy's somewhat frazzled guidance had led to near bare cupboards and piles upon piles of junk.

Her hair, which had been scraped into a messy bun to keep it from her face several hours earlier was is now hanging all over her face, but Kate abandons the attempts to resecure it as she struggles.

"What?" Dutchy turns in interest, immediately rushing forwards to help her lower the box to the ground with absurd ease while Kate shakes circulation back into her fingers. Laughing slightly, Kate peels back the dusty lid. Dutchy, craning his neck to see in, raises an eyebrow. "So not a box of opals, then? Chuck pile?"

"Are you kidding?" Kate laughs, waving a hand into the box. "This... this is my stuff."

"Your..." Dutchy begins in confusion, but trails off as Kate carefully removes the poster that had caught her eye in the first place. Dutchy squints at the band pictured on stage. " _Garbage_?" He sniffs. "Never pictured you for a punk rock fan. Did you dye your hair black too and wear artfully ripped jeans?"

Kate rolls her eyes. "Don't insult Shirley Manson! It was the nineties! And the poster was better than staring at the hole in the wall." She lays the poster down in favour of digging further, humming a song Dutchy recognises vaguely as being recorded by  _Garbage_. He's about to ask her what song it is when Kate laughs. "I thought she would have burned all this in the dead of night." She muses dryly. "My world map!" She tugs it out. "I used to mark all the places I wanted to go." Sure enough, Dutchy sees many dots littering the surface of the paper. There are things that surprise him, like a heavily drawn on pair of converse sneakers, and things that don't, like the books on the sea. Kate fingers the spine of one lightly. "I didn't know what I wanted to do with the sea, but I had to have the water. Thought about being an artist and painting the ever-changing waves every day."

"Why didn't you?" He probes curiously.

Kate sniffs. "I can't draw to save my life."

Together, they continue to flick through the box, occasionally exclaiming as Kate removes more long-forgotten artifacts; a dreamcatcher, a box of cassette tapes and a pair of pointed black boots that Kate fingers lovingly. "I bought these when I was sixteen… ordered from a magazine. When Mum saw them she flipped. Said I wasn't going anywhere dressed like a whore." Kate pauses for a moment, and then, shrugging, toes out of her sandals and begins to pull them on.

"I'm seeing a whole other side to you." Dutchy grins. "I always thought you were such a good little girl."

Kate lets out a dry laugh, before twisting to admire the heeled boots in the mirror. "No one will ever believe you, no matter what you tell them." She grins. "I can't believe she kept all this random stuff."

Dutchy lets out a low whistle, tugging free a guitar pick on a chain "I can't wait til Mackenzie sees all of this." He grins. "What's the friend's name again? Kaylah? Layla?"

"Mikaylah." Kate corrects, running a hand distractedly through her hair, scraping the loose tendrils up her neck, only to have them fall once more. "It's good for her to have a friend, anyway."

Dutchy grins. "Everyone needs a best friend like me."

Kate elbows him lightly, if only because she can't quite bring herself to admit he's right.

o0o

"I've asked for a shore posting." Kate breaks the news to him that afternoon as they drive into the main town. Kate is driving in a meandering sort of fashion as they make their way towards the general store to grab more cardboard boxes.

She's spent most of the day with Dutchy in the stuffy confines of the house, with Mackenzie still at Mikaylah's, and although Kate is intent on packing up as much as she can, she's still I'm no great rush to return.

"I figured you would." Dutchy muses from the passenger seat. He's sat back with one arm lazily out the window, a pair of aviators attached to his face, but even though she can't see them, she can feel his eyes on her.

"Really?" Kate scoffs, turning left. "I didn't have a clue until I called her."

Dutchy nods. He could pass as a true local, something that Kate had never managed. "You wouldn't leave her in a new city to fend for herself." He murmurs. "Teamwork. You were always going to be there."

Kate stops the car as they reach the hardware store just after nine, the heat of the day already shimmering off the tarmac.

Kate heads straight for where the empty boxes are stored, but Dutchy is in his element, scooting around shelves and picking up toolbox after screwdriver, only to deposit them once more in their respective places, "So this is a hardware store, and a post office, and a grocery store all in one?" He replies as he catches up to her in the checkout, running a hand over the different shelves.

"Is that really that amazing?" Kate frowns. "If you're good, I'll buy you a present." Dutchy opens his mouth to reply, but they're both interrupted as someone calls her name.

"Kate? Kate McGregor?" Kate jerks her head up in time to see a rugged looking man of around Kate's age walking towards them. "It's me, Jake Thompson." Kate forces a smile that Dutchy can see doesn't quite reach her eyes. She holds out a hand to shake his, but instead the man tugs her into a hug that nearly sweeps her off her feet and plants a kiss on her cheek. "It's so bloody great to see you. Never thought you'd be back here, though. What have you been up to?"

"Uh… I…"

"Navy." Dutchy cuts in, gently peeling Kate away from the man. "You're looking at the captain of  _HMAS_   _Hammersley_."

"No kidding." Jake grins. "Well, I'm up in the mines now. Or down, I guess. Bit different to sneaking around in them when we were teenagers, hey. But hey, I was talking about you only the other day! We were digging out one of the smaller tunnels and I found your bracelet! You know, the one with the padlock and whatever. It's at my house now. Have to drop it over. You still at Deb's? Bloody shame what happened to her."

"I…" Kate stammers for a moment. "Wow. You… you found the bracelet? I thought I'd lost it in the mines."

"Well, I guess it's not all you lost in the mines, hey?" He tips an enormous wink, and Kate feels her face flush. Beside her, Dutchy lets out a sound somewhere between a squeak and a snort. "But seriously, Kate. I am sorry about Deb. She might have been a cranky old bitch but she was still your Ma, and… and looking after Zee too," He let out a low whistle. "Anyway, it's great to see you again after all this time. I'll drop your bracelet in soon, eh?"

As he mercifully walks away, Dutchy turns to face her with the air of a kid on Christmas morning. "Oh, shut up!" Kate hisses after a while. "I was young, okay. And in my defence, he was hot." She cranes her neck a little to watch him go. "Still kind of is, I guess."

Dutchy snaps a finger in front of her face. "And they say men are shallow. So what? I'm just your wingman?"

"Oh, Dutchy." Kate grins, bumping her elbow into his and recovering whatever shreds of dignity she can. "I did perfectly well in this town without your help, thank you very much."

o0o

The night before the funeral, Kate finds herself pacing the house, scattering cats at every walkthrough. She moves into one room, begins a task, only to abandon it a minute later and move on to another. "You're giving me a headache." Dutchy complains, glancing up from the armchair. The evening is hot, the sound of crickets almost deafening outside as they rely on nothing more than a lazy breeze from a sputtering portable fan.

"I'm stressed." Kate mutters, not pausing from her pacing. The house is nearly stripped bare of personal possessions, the only exceptions the kitchen and living room bookshelf that houses more music than literature.

"Well, you're stressing me out." Dutchy presses, throwing a soft cat toy in her general direction. Pointedly, she continues to pace, and after a few more moments Dutchy stands up and grabs her arm. "Hey! Sit down!"

"Where?" Kate challenges, gesturing around the bare room.

His hand is still gripping Kate's arm when Mackenzie re-enters the room, taking on Kate's path of pacing. "I can't sit still." She complains, before catching sight of Kate and Dutchy. "Oh. Am I interrupting?"

"No." Kate murmurs, tugging her arm free from Dutchy and following Mackenzie. "Neither can I." She's certain that everything is planned, but she can't shake the nagging suspicion that something is going to go wrong.

"What if no one comes?" Mackenzie presses, dragging Kate from her own paranoia. "Or what if I can't speak? Or what if-"

"Hey." Kate reaches across to grip Mackenzie's arm, stalling her in her pacing. "It'll be okay."

"But-"

"No buts." Kate whispers. "Older sister, remember? I'm always right."

Mackenzie nods solemnly, turning to the shelf of records. "I just… I feel like we should be doing something…" She twists impatiently for a moment, before tugging free a record. "What about this one? Mum's favourite?"

"No." Dutchy murmurs.

"Yes!" Kate grins, taking the record from Mackenzie's grasp and feeding it into the record player. There's a moment silence, and then music begins to play.

" _Everybody screamed_ …"

" _When I kissed the teacher_!" Kate and Mackenzie finish, laughing wildly. Dutchy groans and pulls his hands over his ears. And Kate, feeling deliciously content, sings to her heart's content.

o0o

"You look... wow." Dutchy murmurs softly, stopping in the doorway. Kate stills, mascara wand hovering in front of her eyes as she catches sight of his own reflection.

"Same to you." She smiles. "Don't think I've ever seen you in a suit before." She finishes her mascara and caps the tube, dropping it into her handbag. "Can you zip me? I'd ask Zee but she's picking up a dress from Mikaylah's and I can't get the stupid thing."

Dutchy obliges, one hand scooping her hair over one shoulder before sliding the zipper up. The dress is a simple one, all black lace that ends modestly at her knees. "You curled your hair?"

Kate nods, digging in her bag for a lipstick. "The curler is older than me but it did the trick. Thought about wearing the boots but... on the whole." She glances at the simple black heels she's wearing and shrugs. "Mind you, she'd probably still think these were trashy. And she'd hate the dress. And she'd have something to say about my hair too." Her voice is getting quicker and louder as she feels the frustration at her fingertips. Kate seizes her bag and tips the contents across the bench. "And where the hell is my bloody lipstick?!"

"Kate?" Dutchy actually takes a step back as make up, coins, tampons and pens scatter and roll. Kate twists, ignoring the mess on the ground. One hand is sifting through the mess on the bench, although her gaze is still foxed squarely ahead.

"You know, she'd find this funny! She always used to take my stuff! I'd buy a new eyeliner or... or a fucking jacket, and it would be in her talons before the day was up. She used to say she'd given me life, so she'd bloody well borrow a lipstick. She used to call me ungrateful. Then she'd go on and on about what a terrible baby I'd been, how I'd fussed all night and screamed all day. A parasite, she used to call me. And she'd go on about how she'd brought me to Australia, how she'd done it for a better life for me. The way she's go on, you'd think she was fleeing a third world country with a death squad instead of London and an ex-husband who divorced her after she got pissed and shagged his brother." Kate's voice rises as she jabs a finger down the hall. "Like I asked to be born! Like I asked to leave England for this shitty town."

"Kate..." Dutchy tries again, completely taken aback by the outburst.

"And when I joined the Navy it was all about her. How I'm so bloody heartless to leave her all alone. Like she didn't have Max. And then when I tell her I'm going, she tells me to never come back! Well, I'm here now, Mum!" Kate throws her arms out wide, directing her last sentence at the ceilling.

"Come here." Dutchy wraps his arms around her, and immediately Kate dissolves into tears. "I hated her." She sobs. "I shouldn't be sad."

"It's okay." Dutchy whispers, one hand tangled in her hair and the other on the small of her back. He's tall enough that his chin rests on the top of her head. "It's okay."

"I miss her." She sobs. "I miss her."

"I know." He soothes. He still looks completely at a loss, searching for the right thing to say. But before he can speak again, there's a clatter, and they both pull apart as Mackenzie clatters into the bathroom. She blinks, peering between the two of them.

"I... I heard yelling." She stammers lamely. In one hand, she clutches a garment bag, a pair of shoes in the other. Kate barely registers her, or the girl standing behind that, in another situation, Kate would recognise as Mikaylah.

"Yeah." Dutchy murmurs, addressing Zee. "I... uh... stepped on your sister's toe."

"Why?" Mackenzie blinks.

Dutchy frowns. "I... I didn't do it on purpose. Not used to navigating a bathroom with all this girly stuff anyway."

Mackenzie peers down at the contents of Kate's bag now scattered across the floor, before tugging something from her pocket. "I meant to tell you, I borrowed your lippie. Hope that's okay."

Kate lets out a sound halfway between a snort and a sob, wrapping Mackenzie in a hug. "That's fine." She whispers.

o0o

The funeral is excruciating, but she gets through it, and so does Mackenzie. In fact, Zee takes over most of the conversations, introducing Kate and thanking well-wishers. She looks so natural at it that it's a shock when Mackenzie squeezes Kate's hand an hour into the wake. "Can we please go? I can't do this any more."

Ten minutes later, they're pulling into the street, Dutchy driving with Mackenzie and Kate in the back. "You know, Mum would probably say it's not polite to leave a wake like that." Mackenzie muses sadly. "But then, I once saw her chew off her own toenail, so who's she to talk about dignified?"

But instantly, Kate senses danger, though she can't immediately identify why. "Dutchy..." She begins.

"I see it." He calls back, parking the car. "Stay here."

"I... what?" Mackenzie mutters distractedly, staring at the wide open door they'd definitely locked on the way out.

It's all of two seconds for Dutchy to be out of sight before Kate rises. "Lock yourself in when I'm gone. I'll come and get you." She instructs.

"Kate?"

But Kate slams the door, waits until she hears it lock, and then dashes up the front path to find Dutchy and an older man in a frightening shouting match.

"Oi!" Dutchy demands. "What makes you think it's okay to break in?"

"Who the bloody hell are you? And less of this breaking in. Deb gave me a key twenty years ago."

He peers past Dutchy to look at Kate, but it seems she's paralysed with fear. Looking between them, Dutchy shakes his head. "Who are you and what are you doing here?"

"I'm Max." He growls. "And I'm here to take Mackenzie home."

"What?" Dutchy frowns, just as Mackenzie walks in.

"I'm not staying in the car. I-  _Dad_?"

**a/n:** _also I totally don't own Abba but can so imagine Kate's mother playing albums like that over and over again_


	9. Chapter 9

"No." Kate's throat is dry, her head spinning, but she meets Max's gaze with a fierce determination. No way is he taking Mackenzie. No way can he do that to them.

Max turns his patronising gaze onto her as she steps out from behind Dutchy's shadow. Max raises an eyebrow, and he's so close that Kate can smell that disgustingly familiar stench of dust, cigarettes and stale booze that always seemed to accompany him everywhere. "Ooh, she speaks." He snorts. "Little Katie McGregor opens her mouth and graces us once more with her opinion. So  _no_ to what? You're actually deluded enough to think I'd let my only daughter live with the likes of you?"

"Dad, she's been looking after me." Mackenzie murmurs. She takes a step closer, one hand on her father's arm in an attempt to calm him.

Max lets out a harsh bark of laughter. "Well, rumour was she ' _looked after_ ' half this town." He turns his gaze to Dutchy, eyes narrowed as he rakes him up and down. "Got you wrapped around her little finger by the looks of things."

"Dad!" Mackenzie tries again, her voice slightly stronger. "Stop! She's been here for me!"

Max waves a hand between himself and Mackenzie, completely disregarding the words but seeming to take offence to the tone. "We never used to fight, her and I. But here you are again where you're not wanted, meddling in things that don't concern you."

"She's my sister." Kate spits out.

"Half-sister." Max corrects coldly. "And you'll be having nothing else to do with her, I assure you. Now get out of my house. And you..." He turns to face Mackenzie. "You need to show some respect. I don't know what Kate let you get away with, but I'm your father, and you need to show some gratitude."

"I am!" Mackenzie's gaze is blazing as she flashes the smallest of smiles to Kate. "I'm showing gratitude to the woman who dropped her whole life to help me."

"Really?" Max looks down upon Mackenzie as though she is as emotionally scattered as a toddler in mid-tantrum. "Use your brain, Kenz. Did she really care for you, or did she switch your mother's life support off without a moment's hesitation?" He gestures in Kate's direction. "Kenz, she's here to get a big fat payday is what she's here for. The house, the life insurance..."

"Mackenzie, you know that's not true." Dutchy cuts in, but Max moves closer.

"Listen, I don't have the time to listen to you defend your girlfriend. The woman I loved is dead, and I have a daughter to care for. You both have got ten minutes to get your stuff and get out."

* * *

"We'll get a lawyer." Dutchy growls, pacing backwards and forwards in the narrow space of the motel room. The room is so dusty that Kate can taste it upon the air. "Or we'll call the cops. Kate, we can fight this."

"He's her father." Kate murmurs. She's still in a daze, too wrung out from the long day to fully register his use of 'we'. "He's her father, Dutchy. No one is going to give me custody of a half sister I never knew existed two weeks ago." Kate kneads her knuckles into her knees, feeling the need to do something. She wants to run, to hide. She wants to grab Mackenzie and drive somewhere that no one knows them.

"You're an upstanding citizen-" Dutchy begins, but Kate interrupts his defence of her character with a snort.

"I'm a single woman with a dangerous job that takes me all around the world. No stable relationships, no support system..." She kneads her knuckles in harder, wondering if there will be bruises. That, she can almost hope for. Then at least she might have some tangible evidence for the pain she's feeling, rather than just the ache in her heart.

"So... we can figure this out." Dutchy presses. "You don't have... I don't know... a criminal record or an antiques weapon collection easily accessible to children?" He catches sight of Kate's face. "You have an antiques weapon collection easily accessible to children?"

Kate averts her gaze. "I have a juvie record. Just... petty theft when I was a kid."

"Theft?"

"I stole bread. And alcohol. When I was twelve. It's sealed."

Dutchy splutters for a moment before shaking his head. "Okay, well maybe Max doesn't know."

"Fuck's sake, Dutchy, who do you think made me steal it in the first place?" Kate rises and starts to pace, retracing Dutchy's steps. "He knows me! He knows every terrible thing I've done because he'd beat it out of me! He's a conniving prick and now he's got Mackenzie and there's not a damn thing either one of us can do!"

Dutchy shakes his head sadly. "I refuse to believe you were as bad as you say."

"No?" Kate challenges, feeling her whole sad history spill from her. And hell, she knows that when he knows, Dutchy will never look at her the same. She's just so damn tired. "I slept with Jake in the mines, and then the next week went back and fucked his best mate, because it felt nice to be wanted and loved, even if it was just for my body. I was the girl that did well in school, the best in fact, and still screwed around. Even when I was at ADFA I was so lonely I used to go out and get blackout drunk at least once a fortnight and would end up going home with whoever happened to be there at the time, because it felt like I was wanted. And after Mike left me, I drove to a pub half an hour from home and fell right back into old habits. The next morning, when Mike called to apologise and beg for forgiveness, I was trying to sneak out of a stranger's house with my bra in my handbag and pictures of his wife all over the walls." She punctuates the hate in her voice with a kick to the base of the bed.

"Kate-" Dutchy begins, but she finds she can't quite bear to hear what he has to say.

"That would really entertain the crew, wouldn't it?" Kate challenges. "2Dads would have a field day finding out what a slut his boss is."

"You're not a slut." Dutchy's voice is quieter than normal though. She wonders if he believes what he's saying.

"Really?" Kate presses, overwhelmed by the insurmountable evidence that she will never get Mackenzie back. "I was with Jim, still pining over Mike. I've got his engagement ring in one of my drawers because I'm too ashamed to give it back to his parents!"

"Kate-"

"No! Stop calling me Kate like you know me!" Kate swipes angrily at the tears trickling down her face. She doesn't want to cry. She wants the damn hurt to go away. "What are you even doing here?"

"I... I'm here to help you."

"But you can't! I'm sick of feeling like a jigsaw with missing pieces. You can't save me!"

"I want to be there for you!"

"But I never asked you to!"

There's a ringing silence at the end of her words, in which they both stare at each other, and Kate is sure that her eyes must reflect the same hurt and anger that his are. "No." Dutchy agrees finally. "You didn't." For a moment they both fall silent. Kate looks down as she hears movement. She can't bear to see him leave. A moment later, Dutchy is crouched in front of her. "But I'm here. And I'm staying."

Kate clicks her tongue impatiently, averting her gaze. "I could make it an order."

"You could." Dutchy agrees. "But both of us know that you don't have to time, energy or inclination to follow through with a Captain's Table when I disobey." He tucks two fingers under her chin, so that she is looking into eyes. "I don't care what, who or how many you've done in the past. I care about you. You are my best friend, my partner in crime. You're my conscience and my counsellor. You're my captain and my protector. I'm here because you're weathering a storm and you need a life raft. I'm here because you'd do the same for me. I'm here because it causes my physical pain to see you hurt. I'm here because you give and give and give, and you're too bloody stubborn to ask for help. I'm here because you love Mackenzie more than you hate your past. And, most importantly," Dutchy inhales deeply, and Kate wonders if she's ever seen him look so serious. "I'm here because you're a terrible cook, and I held concerns for the household if you so much as looked at a stove."

* * *

Kate goes back to the house the next morning, only to have Max slam the door in her face. The next day she goes again with similar results, although she does manage to catch a glimpse of Mackenzie on her way back to the car. After having the door slammed on her for a third day, Kate perches next to Dutchy in their stuffy motel room and watches mutely as Dutchy FaceTimes with an attractive redhead.

"You do know I'm in criminal law, not family court, right?" The girl shuffles papers on her desk, before glancing up and flashing an apologetic smile at Kate. "I don't want to get your hopes up, because my brother is a hopeless optimist and it's not always..."

Dutchy holds up a hand to silence her. "I know it's not exactly your area of expertise, but, Gracie, whatever you can tell us... or if you can recommend a good family court-"

"He won't even let me see her." Kate cuts in, still staring off into space. "Surely there's... something?"

Kate hears Gracie sigh. "I don't know. Speaking generally, father trumps half-sister. If there were some extenuating circumstances, like he was found to be harming her or neglecting, then there could be a possibility of temporary guardianship..."

Kate zones out, her eyes misting over. She's dimly aware of Dutchy in the background, his voice a comforting murmur, dutifully preparing plans A-Z.

"Maybe... maybe it's for the best." Kate interrupts, and silence falls from both the phone and Dutchy. Then:

"What?"

Kate twists a strand of hair over and over. "He's her father. He loves her. Maybe he... maybe he is a better carer than me."

Dutchy looks at her incredulously. "So you're just giving up?"

Kate shakes her head sadly. "Let's face it, Dutchy. She was never mine to give up. I... I just need to think."

She rises, already halfway to the door when Dutchy calls after her. "Where are you going?"

Kate steps out into the sweltering heat, moving quickly towards the car. "I need some air."

* * *

 **A/N:** So I guess a few of you won't quite agree with this characterisation of Kate's teenage years. I guess I just kind of wanted to show a more... I don't know... hurting and damaged young girl. I know quite a few people begin to look for love in the wrong places, mistaking intimacy and love.

 


	10. Chapter 10

She knows where she'll end up before she even keys the ignition. Every fibre of her body is screaming at her to run, to hide. The energy flowing through her veins is almost too much, so that she finds herself raking her fingernails over her forearms, part of her convinced that, absurd as it sounds, if she were to split her skin, at least some of the pressure would drop. It seems almost impossible that this much energy can reside in her body; she half expects trees to burst into flame as she passes, a world aglow.

She barely suppresses a scream as she feels the anger and fear well up in her, little phrases from Gracie's conversation welling up in her.  _Father trumps half-sister._

By the time she's parked her car outside Debbie's house, Kate is determined to keep the tears at bay. Not for herself. No, she'll cry her tears later. But for Mackenzie, because she can't bear to make this harder than it has to be. Every footstep up the front drive feels like a walk to the executioner, every limb shaking, but she forces herself to keep going.  _Just a few more steps. Just a knock. Just speak. Just do it, Kate._

"Don't slam the door. Please!" Kate holds up both hands in defence as she forces herself to keep Max's gaze. And although every piece of her wants to run screaming and claim protection from this man who haunted her childhood, she makes herself keep talking. "You... you win, okay? I just want to say goodbye. Please, just give me that. I'm begging you."

She expects a sneer, or some double-entendre about her ability to beg. What she doesn't expect is for Max to push the door open. "She's not here. You can check if you want but she's not. She's with Mikaylah." Max's voice is different, calmer as he fumbles in his pocket and withdraws a packet of cigarettes. Once he's lit it with shaking hands, he gestures with the now benign lighter in Kate's direction, talking with the cigarette clutched between his teeth. "You paid for the funeral. You didn't have to do that."

Kate blinks on confusion. "I..." She clears her throat. "She was still my mother, whatever... whatever happened." She wonders whether he can remember that time as well as she can, his memory tarnished by substance abuse, and hers from the sheer will to suppress it.

She expects at any moment to be told to go, ordered away like a dog from a dinner table, but once again he surprises her, as he perches on the step opposite her. He takes a long deep drag of the cigarette, and Kate has a sudden memory of watching him smoke in the dark, the lit end glinting like a firefly. "She's been over at Mikaylah's most of the last few days, actually. You can... you can go over there and see her."

Kate nods in silent gratitude, and is about to go when a mewling catches her attention, and Malin darts out to rub his side against Kate's leg. Instinctively, Kate crouches, one hand stroking the soft fur. "Bye, buddy." She whispers. "You look after her." She's not sure whether she's talking to Malin or Max. As she stands, blinking tears from her eyes, she turns to Max. "She's been having nightmares. So she might need some help in the night. There's a box of Debbie's jewellery and... just sentimental little trinkets. They're in a box with Zee's name on it. And the cats will need... well, I'm sure Zee will tell you everything you need to know. And-"

"Kate..." Max begins, as Kate sniffs, expecting anger. "I'll look after her." Maybe he notices her flinching, because after a short pause he takes a deep breath, and begins. "Kate, some of the stuff that happened... I want to say it wasn't-"

"Kate! Max!" A yell wrenches the moment apart, a voice full of sheer terror. They both jerk their heads up, and instinctively Kate jogs to the girl pinwheeling her arms and sprinting towards them. Mikaylah skids to a halt in front of them, gasping and wide-eyed as she lays one hand on Kate's arm, gripping tight. "Help! Please, it's Zee! It was supposed to be a joke, but she drank it and... and I went home and she stayed and when I got back she... she's vomiting and she won't wake up!"

Panic claws at her chest, prising apart her ribs to constrict her heart, but she forces herself to remain calm.  _Navy Kate._ "Where is she?"

"At my house. I...  _please._  I didn't want to leave her but our phone got cut off and..." But Kate is already running down the street in the direction of Mikaylah's house, the young girl hot on her heels. She doesn't bother to knock at the front door, or wait for Mikaylah, instead bowling into the house. It's more or less the same setup as Debbie's house - all the houses here are - and instinct sends her to the right door.

"It was just supposed to be some fun." Mikaylah moans, but Kate isn't listening.

Instead, she's staring at her sister lying in a pool of her own vomit. "Makenzie!" Kate shrieks, and it's instinct that propels her forwards, hands feeling, rolling. "Max, call for an ambulance!" She yells, but as Max makes it to the doorway, his face pales.

"She-"

"Ambulance!" Kate repeats, desperately seeking out a pulse. It's there, but faint. "Mackenzie, Sweetie!" She twists to see Max still frozen in the doorway.

"Max, I know you're scared, but we need to help her. Call an ambulance and tell them..." Kate glances briefly at the near empty rum bottle beside her. The next time she looks up, Max has gone, the sound of sprinting fading quickly. "How much did she drink?" Kate demands of Mikaylah.

"It was just a bit." Mikaylah moans. "We swiped the bottle and we were going to try it. We had a bit last night and... and she stayed here when I went out and..." Mikaylah gives an enormous hiccup and dissolves into tears, her next few words barely audible. "I didn't - know - whattado - I propped - head up - pillow."

"It's okay." Kate soothes, even as she's feeling for a pulse once more. Max reappears, still white and shaking. "Where's the ambulance?"

"On its way. It's-" Mackenzie gives a great gurgle, and begins to splutter.

"Shit." Kate curses, as Mackenzie begins to choke on her own vomit. "No."

" _Help her!_ " Max bellows.

And as she sends a prayer to a God she hasn't prayed to in decades, she shoves a finger down Mackenzie's throat, trying desperately to get rid of whatever is blocking her throat. The stink of bile and alcohol stings Kate's nostrils, and she swallows down her own urge to be sick. More vomit trickles out, but Kate has no time to feel disgusted at the sickly warmth down her wrist. All that matters is keeping Mackenzie's airway open. It will all be okay if she keeps her alive.

"What are you doing?" Mikaylah moans.

"Trying to keep her breathing." Kate murmurs. "How full was the bottle?"

"I don't know. Probably... like three quarters when I left. Oh God." Mikaylah shakes her head. "She was upset. She said she wanted to do something crazy. She was... I just went out for a few hours. She didn't want to go home!"

Beside her, Max flinches, but Kate has no time for worrying about that. All that matters is Mackenzie. Kate crouches low, her mouth close to Mackenzie's ear. "Come on, Baby! You stay awake for me, you hear?"

* * *

She doesn't start to shake until Mackenzie has been wheeled away, surrounded by dozens, all shouting out numbers and long, complicated words that mean nothing. That's when it hits - the enormity of it all - and Kate has to rush into the bathrooms to vomit horrifically into the toilet. By the time she's washed up and returned to the waiting room, Max is pacing. They make eye contact for the smallest of moments, before he nods and they avert eyes.

Every part of her is shaking. There's a soft buzzing in her hip, pulsing on and off, and it takes several sequences before she realises that it's her mobile.

It's Dutchy. Of course it's him, and just hearing his voice is enough to bring her back to earth and away from the  _what if_ s.  _What if Mikaylah hadn't come home in time? What if she'd run? What if Kate hadn't been able to clear her throat. What if she dies?_

" _Kate?"_ Dutchy calls into the phone. " _You've been gone for hours. Are you okay? Where are you?"_

 _"_ H... hospital." Kate whimpers.

_"Hospital? Kate, what-"_

"Mackenzie." She says simply. "Please... I need you."

* * *

"She's going to be okay, right?" It's Max that breaks the silence between the two of them. "I mean," he presses, "You... you knew what to do. You... you were so calm."

"I wasn't calm." Kate's voice cracks, and she lets herself slide down the wall. "I've never been so scared."

"You didn't look it." Max murmurs. "You were doing everything and I just... I froze." She glances at him and is taken aback to see his hand shaking too. "My girl needed me, and I froze." He shakes his head. "This is all my fault."

Never in her wildest dreams did she ever imagine she'd feel sorry for Max Bishop. Never in a million years did she ever think she'd be struggling to find the words to comfort him. But before Kate has even started to get her head around this wild new development, Max rises. "I need a cigarette." He mutters.

"Okay. I'll stay." Max freezes at her voice, almost as if he hadn't quite expected her to speak. For a moment he stares at the opposite wall, his back to her, and then he turns, taking a few shaky steps towards her.

"Mackenzie... that first night... she told me everything that you've done for her." He twists his hands. "I was surprised, but I shouldn't have been. I shouldn't have gotten angry at you. I should have said thanks." He cracks his knuckles, popping the joints one by one, the noise like a gunshot. "I know I was an arsehole when you were a kid. I could tell you a sob story about how my old man beat me but it doesn't..." He swallows. "It shouldn't have changed things, having Zee, but it did. I don't want her growing up in a world where she thinks what Deb and I put you through was okay. I'm sorry you had to feel it was ever your fault. I... I'm sorry."

It's the last thing she's expecting, and she barely has time to process this when Dutchy calls her name. "Kate! What happened!"

She falls into Dutchy's arms, and by the time she emerges, Max has disappeared so completely, that it's as if he was never there at all.

* * *

"The things that you told me..." Dutchy begins, one of his legs bouncing up and down in apparent anxiety as they sit side by side on uncomfortable hospital chairs. "It doesn't change things."

Kate keeps her gaze on her shoes. "Really?" She muses. "How can it not, Dutchy?" She regrets asking the question almost immediately, loathe as she is to hear an emotional hope spiel at this moment in time. Instead, Dutchy begins to speak.

"I was in love. Her name was Megan. Megs. We'd been together since we were fourteen." Kate has no idea where he's going with the story, or why he's choosing to tell it to her, but she says nothing. "When we were both nineteen, she got pregnant." Kate's head jerks up in shock, meeting Dutchy's gaze. "Yeah." He confirms. "I mean, we were both young, but... I was excited. I wanted to be a Dad. I think... it was like, when she told me, she was expecting... and maybe hoping that I would end things. But... I loved her."

He pauses, and Kate smiles sadly. "Something tells me it's not exactly a happy story."

Dutchy gives a dry chuckle. "She was about... I don't know... six months pregnant when I found out that the baby wasn't mine. It's not like I even suspected, you know? She just... blurted it out during an argument." He sighs. "I was pissed off, sure. But I... I wanted to stay together. I wanted to raise the baby as my own. And then I found out... it wasn't even a fling, you know? She was planning on running off with this guy. She wanted a life with him. She didn't want to be with me." A doctor strides towards them and they both look up instinctively, but he passes them, and Dutchy continues. "After that... after she left and everyone knew that I was the guy who'd been duped... I left. I joined the Navy. But I never let anyone close. I became a serial bastard.  _I_ broke the hearts, because it wasn't as painful as eventually having your heart broken. And there were lots...  _lots_ of women. Some women I cared about, some who I didn't even know their names. And I led them all on, used them for my own selfishness." He looks up at her. "Does that change how  _you_ see  _me_?"

"No." The answer rolls off her tongue without conscious thought.

"And if you knew about how I used to let my sister paint my nails, and everyone used to go on about what a good brother I was, but really I just liked the colours? Would that change your opinion of me?"

"No." Kate repeats, a smile twisting her face.

"So do you honestly think that I would push the only woman I've gotten this close to away?" He leans closer, his voice lowering to a whisper. "I'll give you a hint. Same answer as question one and two."

"Dutchy..." Kate begins. "I... it's..."

"You were searching for someone to care for you." Dutchy murmurs. "And it took you a while. But you've got that someone now. So don't push me away. Please." Kate hesitates for a moment, then drops her hand into his.

"I'm scared. What if Mackenzie..." She trails off, but Dutchy squeezes her hand, and she finds the strength to keep going. "And  _if_ she survives, what if Mackenzie is like that too? I don't want her making the same mistakes I did. I don't want her... I don't want her thinking that a stranger's bed or an empty bottle is the only place she's going to find comfort."

"She won't." Dutchy smiles.

"You don't know that." Kate moans. "You keep saying that she'll never feel like that but-"

"I do know." Dutchy presses. "I know she'll never feel alone again. Or unloved. Or any of those things that you felt. She'll never be like that, because she's got you."


	11. Chapter 11

Dutchy dozes in the stiff-backed hospital chair beside her, his enormous stature almost comically folded in on itself, so hunched that Kate knows when he wakes, he'll probably have a throbbing neck-ache. Kate doesn't sleep. For one thing, it's too noisy, a cacophony of beeping, of constant chatter and footsteps echoing. The smell fills her nostrils, of that horribly sterile cleanliness that sends her stomach churning. But it's not just that, or the lack of anywhere even remotely comfortable to lie. There's a deep, twisted part of her hissing that if she falls asleep, bad things will happen. And she needs Mackenzie to be okay, has never needed anything more.

She paces. Dutchy sleeps on, so there's no one to bring her back to earth, and she spirals horribly, her mind imagining horrific things. Mackenzie, dead. Mackenzie, drunkenly kissing strangers. Mackenzie, in a strange bed. Memories of the past intermingle with a terrifying future, until Kate is near-hysterical with panic, chanting over and over in her head.  _Please. Please. Please._

She paces on, because walking feels better than doing nothing. Time doesn't exist. There's no clock in sight, Kate's phone has long-since died, and Dutchy's arm is folded in such a way she can't read the watch face. She can't tell whether it's day or night, light or dark, in this windowless corridor, but she has no inclination to move and find out.

_Mackenzie._

_Mackenzie._

Every individual heartbeat seems to scream her name, filling her from the inside out. She needs Mackenzie to be okay. She doesn't think she'll survive if... if...

The coffee tastes like ratsac but she gulps it down, relishing in the bitterness of it all. She regrets it soon after though, as the caffeine on top of everything else makes her feel dizzy and nauseous, not to mention jittery as hell. She increases her pacing, counting her steps as she goes.  _1, 2, 3, 4, 5, Turn. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, Turn._

Dutchy gives a grunt, then stirs and opens his eyes. "Hey." He murmurs, and Kate hears the popping of joints as he stretches his arms to the ceiling. "Any news?" The panicked side of her wants to attack, wants to punish him for being able to sleep through this terror and misery while she is here, enduring it all. And then she takes a breath and remembers that this is the man who drove thousands of kilometres to bring Mackenzie a cat and stand by Kate's side in the toughest days of her life. He doesn't have to be here. He'd chosen to stay to help her.

"Not yet." Is no news really good news? How hard is it, really, for someone to pop their head out and tell her if Mackenzie is still alive?

Dutchy's eyes narrow as takes in Kate. "You're shaking." He points out.

"Too much coffee." Kate answers, both of them knowing it's a half-truth. Sure, the coffee must have been a contributing factor. But she's done twice this amount of caffeine in half the time and barely broken a sweat. "I..." It's then that she notices her teeth are chattering, and her legs are jelly. She wobbles, and before she's even had time to process this turn of events, Dutchy has wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into the chair next to him.

"You need to rest." He murmurs. "Or eat. Or both." Kate shakes her head, not even bothering to dignify it with a response. How could she even fathom thinking about food when Mackenzie's life hung in the balance? Dutchy seems to know what she's thinking though, and he leans closer. "You're no good to her burned out."

Kate tosses her head again. "Can't sleep. Just need a distraction. I can't..." She's flicking her feet over each other too, her whole body twitching.

"Okay." Dutchy murmurs. Kate's foot begins to tap as she twists her fingers over and over, but he patiently grips her hands in his, forcing at least part of her body to still. "When Gracie and I were kids, we used to go camping all the time. Most of the time we'd take a tent, but sometimes we'd just take sleeping bags. That's the thing I like most about this town. That you can look up at night and see the stars. It reminds me of home. And the sea." Kate's knee is jerking, but she focuses on Dutchy's words all the same.

"I used to lay out on the trampoline if things were..." She stops herself, not wanting to dwell on any other bad memories. Instead, she adds, "I used to love stargazing."

He nods in enthusiasm, a smile spreading across his face. "It's amazing, right? This infinite universe, full of all these stars billions and billions of years old. And we used to make campfires. Sometimes we'd bring sausages and cook them on spears, but sometimes we'd catch the odd rabbit. Mum is really into botany, so we'd know which plants were edible and which aren't. And when we were gone, we'd play all these pretend games. You know, that we were fighting to survive in some post-apocalyptic world, or exploring some newfound land."

Kate's still shaking, but she finds she's taking comfort from Dutchy's words, and smiles as she rests her head on his shoulder. "Thanks for being here." She whispers.

They sit in silence for a long while, his arm around her and her head resting on his shoulder. She feels as though they could almost be ghosts, from the little attention anyone gives them. "I'm here for as long as you need me." He whispers.

* * *

It feels like hours later that a doctor finally stops in front of her, interrupting Kate's intense visual examination of the opposite wall. He peers over his glasses at them both, and Kate feels herself immediately snap to attention, fingers crossed in her pocket. "Family of Ms McGregor?" He enquires dryly. He has a voice like a 300-year-old librarian, but Kate finds she'd happily listen to fingernails scraping on a chalkboard if they'd only tell her Mackenzie is alright.

"Yes." Kate gabbles, impatiently tucking a clump of hair behind her ears. "Is she... please, is she okay?"

He leaves her in suspense for a full ten seconds, like some twisted game show host delaying the big reveal. Just when Kate feels as though she's going to start hitting him, he warbles on. "Ms McGregor is stable at the moment. Due to her small stature and the amount of alcohol ingested we were forced to pump her stomach. She'll be feeling pretty sore and sick for the next few days, but I anticipate her to make a full recovery."

Kate feels relief wash over her like waves of sunshine. "Can I see her?"

His smile fades, and Kate feels as though a cloud has blocked her light. "In cases such as this, we are required by law to report it. At the moment, Ms McGregor is in with a social worker, and after that she'll have a session with our psychologist, who will help to assess our next steps."

_Next steps. She might not see her again._

Dutchy rubs circles on her back. "But she's okay." He murmurs, as the doctor stalks away. "She's going to be alright. That's the main thing."

"Yeah." Kate exhales deeply, closing her eyes against his touch. "Yeah."

* * *

The town is silent at night. There's no bustling cars along the streets, no trains pulling horns or tourists giggling and shopping. Just silence. And Kate breathes it all in, coffee cup clutched to her chest as she closes her eyes against the wall of silence.

_Stomach pumped. Next steps. Psychologist._

"Can I have a word?" Max's voice makes Kate jump; she hadn't realised he was there, thinking she was all alone with the silence of the night. Once more, a lit cigarette twinkles in the darkness, glittering like a firefly.

"Sure." She murmurs flatly. She knows what he wants to talk about, and why. There's no point pretending any differently.

"I... I want what's best for Mackenzie." He presses, and she nods tersely.

"Yeah, I do too." Kate agrees. She wonders whether he's going to ask her flat-out to leave Mackenzie's life for good. Whether he'll declare her such a bad influence on his daughter that she should not be allowed anywhere near her again.  _Well,_ she thinks drily.  _Can't say I blame him after this._

"You're... you're in the Navy, right?" He asks, and the question is so completely unexpected that she frowns.

"Yeah." Kate stammers. "Patrol boats. But I... I took a shore posting. I start in two weeks." For a moment, she imagines coming home every night to that empty house, without even a bloody cat to keep her company.

"In Cairns?"

"Yeah." Of course, the crew would probably visit every few shore leaves, but it was so easy to drift apart, especially in the Navy. And Dutchy...

"And that... Stitchy?" He presses, gesturing lamely in the direction of the hospital.

"Dutchy?" Kate frowns.

"Yeah." He agrees. "Are you... is he-"

"He's a friend." Kate murmurs, wondering just how many times she will have to say it. "Just a friend." The old Max would have said something snide, but he nods tersely.

"I need a smoke." He says eventually.

* * *

Dutchy doesn't tell her to rest, or sit down, or  _take a break,_ or those million other infuriating things she's been told over the last twenty-four hours. And she knows it's because he wouldn't expect her to. He knows her too well to kid himself she could be calmed down in a situation like this.

So he stays by her side, occasionally offering her water or a sandwich, but generally sitting back, allowing her to pace. He's there when they watch the social worker walk curtly down the hall, heels clicking. He's there when the doctors do their rounds. He's there when the lights dim ever so slightly and it becomes apparent it's night.

She dozes with her head on his shoulder, too panicked to fall into a deep sleep, waking every hour or so, heart pounding. When she does dream, they're vague images of empty bottles, of pools of vomit, and Mackenzie's pale face.

* * *

It isn't until nearly nearly eight in the morning by Dutchy's watch that the doctor returns to them, and Kate feels any traces of drowsiness leave her body as she stands up, moving to meet him. "Who is the legal guardian of Mackenzie?"

Kate exchanges a glance with Max, who was still sitting hunched in his seat, reeking of cigarettes. Neither of them answer. She can't bear to leave. But this is it; the question that will end this whole pointless adventure.

"She is." Max's voice cuts through the silence, and Kate feels her eyes widen. Surely he hadn't said... "Debbie left Mackenzie in Kate's custody."

The doctor nods curtly, taking Max at his word, and he directs his next words to Kate. "Well, Mackenzie is awake and coherent, should you wish to see her."

"Yes!" Kate exclaims. "I..." She turns to face Max, and there's something like pain all over his face. As he meets Kate's eyes, he exhales deeply. "You look after my little girl, okay? You just... you look out for her."

"I will." Kate agrees.

For a while they stare at each other, and then Max nods to the door. "She needs you. You should go and see her."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Kate's footsteps are shaky, but she tries to inject some purpose into her gate as she moves down the hallway where, behind one of these doors, is Mackenzie. Her Mackenzie. Her...

How can one girl fit so many labels in her life? Her sister. Her child. Her heart.  _Mackenzie._

"Just in here." The doctor gestures towards a door to her right, stepping back to let her enter. Part of her wants him to stay, or wishes that Dutchy had come too. Even Max would have been a somewhat welcoming companion against this guilt and fear welling inside of her. "You can enter when you're ready." The doctor adds, and Kate starts. How long had she been standing, frozen, one hand on the door handle.

For hours and hours, days even, she's been praying for the chance to see Mackenzie  _just one more time_ and now... now, she'd been given a second chance,  _the_ second chance, and she couldn't even bring herself to open the damn door. Of course, Kate is no stranger to dangerous situations, jumping into gunfights and leaping onto moving vessels but this... this requires a different kind of bravery. Like the type that sends you thousands of kilometres to track down a sister you've never met. Or the type to watch your mother die. And Kate finds herself internally berating herself.  _Be brave like Mackenzie._

Turning the handle and pushing open the door seems to take all the strength she has. "Mackenzie." Kate has no idea what else to say. She's so taken aback by the fact that this tiny girl, swamped in hospital blankets and cords, is her sister. Her  _sister._ And now, her responsibility. "Mackenzie..." She whispers again, and this time the girl moves slightly.

"Kate." Mackenzie's voice is little more than a whimper, one hand flung over her eyes, shielding them from the harsh hospital lights, while the other clutches a fist full of blankets and twists it tighter and tighter.

"Oh, Zee." Kate seems to fly the last few metres, sinking into the chair next to the bed and smoothing the hair from Mackenzie's face.

"I didn't mean to do it." Mackenzie starts to sob almost immediately, still hiding her face behind her hand. "It was an accident. I just... I just drank a bit. And then..." Kate feels wet trailing down her cheeks as well, and she lets them fall, both hands clutching Mackenzie. "I swear, Kate, I didn't mean to."

"I know, baby. I know." Kate's voice cracks as she stares down at the girl she'd come so close to losing.

"I'm so sorry." Mackenzie's voice rises, her hand still twisting around and around.

"I know." Kate repeats. "It's okay. It's over."

"I didn't want..."

"It's okay." Kate whispers, pressing a kiss to Mackenzie's forehead. "It's going to be okay."

* * *

They don't talk that first time. Not about that anyway. No, the time they spend together is precious, going beyond words, and Kate's spends it making sure Mackenzie knows just how loved she is. For the most part, Max gives Kate and Mackenzie the time alone. Kate had half-expected for him to back-flip on his decision, but when she'd emerged from Mackenzie's hospital bed, the young girl crying herself to sleep, it was to find him gone. Far from finding this reassuring, Kate finds herself pacing more and more. Dutchy drags her back to the motel for a shower and a couple of hours sleep before she returns, her heart hammering as she expects to find an empty bed.

Max is in the room when she returns, and Kate finds herself sucking in her breath. But Max looks up as she enters, and gestures her closer. He turns his attention to Kate, speaking to her. "Mackenzie and I were just talking about what she'd like to do. And we've agreed, if you'll have her, that she'd like to live with you, in Cairns."

"O... of course." Kate feels her insides settle to the places they're supposed to be as she finds herself smiling properly for the first time in recent memory. "Yes. Yes."

Max nods curtly. "I'd like to see her, mind. For the odd school holiday. Work's pretty sporadic but..."

"Whenever you want." Kate says, and with surprise she finds she means it. "Th... thank you, Max."

He nods curtly once more. "Thanks, Dad." Mackenzie whispers, wrapping him in a hug.

* * *

It isn't until the day before Mackenzie is due to be discharged that she brings up the events that had lead her to the emergency room. "Mikaylah said you found me."

Kate sets down the deck of Uno cards she'd previously been holding, peering at her sister. "Yeah." She agrees. Time had stemmed the flood of images that, for the first twenty-four hours or so, had haunted her every waking moment, but she's still assaulted by the images during her sleep, and Mackenzie's words bring them to the surface once more.

"I'm sorry." Mackenzie murmurs. Kate has lost count of the amount of times Mackenzie has apologised in the last few days. "It... it must have been scary."

"Terrifying." Kate murmurs. "I... I had to stop you from choking."

"If Mikaylah hadn't found me, and if you weren't there..." Mackenzie starts to sob again. "You must be so ashamed of me. It's the most stupid thing-"

"I've had my stomach pumped." Kate interjects, and even as she says the words, part of her is screaming at her to stuff them back in her mouth, to hide it from this impressionable girl who doesn't need to know just how much of a failure she is. But something in the way Mackenzie says  _ashamed,_ things that Kate could ever be ashamed of Mackenzie, forces her to keep talking. "I've had my stomach pumped twice when I've gotten... black-out drunk."

"What?"

"I had problems with alcohol when I was younger. I was lonely. And scared. And alcohol made me feel brave. When I was at ADFA I used to go to different bars, where no one would know me, and I'd drink until I couldn't..." Kate sucks in a breath. "That time, I didn't think I'd drunk that much. After I woke up in hospital on the Sunday morning I was so ashamed of myself. I swore I would never drink again and then the next weekend I was so sick of feeling anxious and lonely that I went back to that same pub." Kate speaks quickly, the words tumbling from her as though from a bucket with a hole. "The second time was... about a year ago. I... I was pregnant."

"What?"

"My... my partner and I... well, we'd had our problems, but when I got pregnant, we were both so excited. But I lost it. At thirteen weeks."

"Kate..."

"It was too early to know but... I felt like I was having a little girl. And then I lost her and... and after we got back from the hospital he... he couldn't even look at me. He went out drinking his sorrows away and I... I was alone. And after a couple of weeks he told me that he couldn't... he didn't think we were going to work. He thought we should take a break." Kate closes her eyes, and she can see that look on Mike's face as he ducked his eyes away from hers and broke her heart.

"Bastard." Mackenzie mutters.

"I mean he was hurting too and..." Kate bites her lip, wondering why she's defending him. "Yeah, you're right. He was a bastard. But I loved him. And so I went to a pub forty minutes away, got blind drunk and ended up having sex with some random stranger. And meanwhile, Dutchy had holed Mike up and pressed him to know whether Mike really thought we were over. When I woke up, it was to a pot ding headache and twelve messages of Mike telling me how much he loved me. And I couldn't handle the guilt. So I did what I do best and I drank some more. And I woke up in hospital two days later." Kate shakes her head. "I don't want you to make the same mistakes I have. Alcohol isn't an... an anaesthetic."

Mackenzie shakes her head. "I wanted the silence. Just for a bit. I didn't mean to..." She gestures around. "It was stupid."

Kate nods slowly. "But you know, that if you  _ever_ feel like that again, you come and find me, okay? You call me, or you wake me, or you kick down my door and poke me awake. Day or night, whatever, whenever. You come and get me, okay?" She waits until Mackenzie nods before dropping her gaze once more, wiping her eyes on the sleeve of a shirt.

"Dutchy's in love with you, you know." Makenzie murmurs. When Kate only licks her lips nervously, she continues. "Of course you know. You're too smart not to. Anyone would be able to tell. So why not go for it?"

"We're... we're on the same ship." Even to Kate's ears, the excuse is a lame one.

Mackenzie rolls her eyes. "Not anymore."

"I... it's complicated."

"How?" She challenges.

The thing is, Kate can't put it into words. The whole thing is so complicated, even Kate struggles to understand her reasons. "He's my best friend."

Mackenzie blows a raspberry with her hands. "You've said that so many times, it's lost its meaning. But I'll humour you. What's so bad about being with your best friend?"

"He's the only guy I..." Kate throws a glance behind her, as though making sure Dutchy isn't hovering just out of reach, listening to everything they're saying, even though she knows full well he's still at the motel. "If I lost him, I wouldn't survive. I can't ruin it with sex."

"Sex doesn't always ruin things." Mackenzie murmurs.

"In my experience, it does." Kate protests.

Mackenzie shrugs. "Well, I mean, whether you listen to the thirteen-year-old virgin or not but... it seems like you were using sex to find someone who'd care for you. But... you've already got that person." Kate exhales deeply and Mackenzie presses on. "Do you love him?"

Kate's surprised when the answer bubbles up, before she's even had a chance to consider the implications of bring it out into the world. "Yes." Kate murmurs. "Yes."

* * *

Mackenzie returns from her last day with Max red-eyed and sniffly, but she still smiles at Kate and Dutchy as they peer around at the unrecognisably clean house. The boards had been pried from the windows, the wooden floorboards polished, the carpets scrubbed and vacuumed. Most of the possessions from the house had been packed into boxes and put into storage, but all of Mackenzie's clothes, books and possessions are now stuffed into the back of Dutchy's car, where there is just enough room for the three of them to travel in, as well as Malin the cat.

Mackenzie had already said a tearful farewell to her other cats, who were now staying with Mikaylah, and the girls had clung to each other like they were drowning and declared that they would  _call each other every day, okay?_ Kate was almost tempted to start making teasing comments, but then she remembers just how much Mikaylah had looked out for Mackenzie over the years, and she bites her tongue.

That night, they all sleep in the lounge room, the light of the moon flooding in and bathing the room in a bright glow. Dutchy and Mackenzie fall asleep instantly, Mackenzie slightly apart from them, curled up with Malin on her mattress. Kate, however, remains awake for several hours, feeling the close proximity between her and Dutchy radiating between them, and all the while, her brain chants  _Kate loves Dutchy. Kate loves Dutchy,_ like some schoolyard song.

Dutchy wakes her early the next morning, shaking her lightly on the shoulder, coffee already in hand. She gulps it down gratefully, staring through the early dawn at the house she was leaving behind for good.

Mackenzie is already dressed and pushing her mattress back towards her room. "It feels weird. To be leaving." She murmurs when she returns, looking around at the lounge room, empty save the rickety armchair and the mattress Kate is still sitting on. "Like I'm leaving part of her behind."

Kate stands up as she drains the rest of her coffee. "We can always keep the house. We don't have to sell it."

Mackenzie shakes her head. "I want to. I think... she'd want me to keep going. To not look back." And although there's tears in her eyes, she smiles a watery grin up at Kate. "I'm ready."

* * *

"No!" Dutchy shakes his head, eyes on the road while one hand deftly reaches out, struggling to snatch the CD from Kate's grip. "I am  _not_ listening to  _Abba_  the entire way back to Cairns. Not in my car! No!"

"Oh, come  _on,_ Dutchy!" Mackenzie wines, Malin punctuating her words with loud mewls. As Kate twists around in her seat, she watches Mackenzie attempt to placate the kitten by sticking a finger into her cage. "I'm leaving my home."

"No. I draw the line at watching those  _ridiculous_ movies with you both. And do  _not_ try that line on me when you've already used it to get me to play that  _Florence and the Robot_ or whatever album,  _and_ whatever that hippy dippy album we just finished was."

" _Mamma_   _Mia_  is not ridiculous!" Mackenzie protests. "Even you were singing along to  _Dancing Queen._  And it's  _Florence and the Machine,_  which I'm willing to bet you already knew because you were also singing along to that!"

"Lies." Dutchy grins. "I didn't even realise you smuggled them into your handbag. And  _if_ I happened to know a song, it's because your sister's probably warbled them out somewhere already."

Kate yawns widely, too sleepy to bother pretending to be outraged at his insults. "What can I say? I'm a woman of many skills." She sighs, as the beginnings of the CD starts to play.

* * *

That night, they crash in a motel just out of Alice Springs that's so quiet, Kate swears she sees an actual tumbleweed skip past them on the way to the reception. The woman is more than happy to rent them a family room for the night (Kate feels her stomach twist uncomfortably as she compliments Kate and Dutchy on such a well-mannered daughter) and as the sun sets the three of them lay on a bed each; Mackenzie and Kate each on a single bed after Kate insists Dutchy, being the tallest and having done the bulk of the driving, take the double.

"We should go and get food." Kate mumbles into the darkening room as Mackenzie's stomach grumbles in the silence.

"Yep." Mackenzie agrees, barely stifling a yawn as she stares up at the ceiling fan.

"We should." Dutchy murmurs too. None of them move.

"We could order pizza?" Kate suggests lamely, swatting unsuccessfully at a fly as it zooms past her ear. A light snore is the only answer from Dutchy. "You call." Kate mumbles, deftly tossing her phone onto Mackenzie's bed as she closes her eyes. "Nothing with pineapple on it. Credit card's in my wallet." And she too closes her eyes.

* * *

Kate looks up as she hears crunching feet on the gravel drive, raising a hand in lazy greeting. A moment later, Dutchy catches sight of her and makes a bee-line for her, unlocking the pool gate with one hand and cradling three pieces of cold pizza in the other. He takes the spot next to her, dropping two of the pieces in her lap and sticking the third in his mouth.

Kate takes a bite, relishing in the sweet taste of the BBQ sauce. "Couldn't sleep either?" She queries.

"Well, after we slept... what, three hours earlier tonight, I didn't really expect to." He sticks his feet into the end of the pool too, and Kate wriggles her toes, closing her eyes for a moment at the blissfully weightless feeling, even if it is only in her feet. "You know, you're allowed to be upset, Kate."

Once again, she finds herself marvelling at his ability to know exactly what she's thinking. She takes the last bite of her pizza piece, shaking her head. "I'm supposed to be strong. Mackenzie needs me to be strong." She hands him back the second piece of pizza. "You have it. You're probably hungrier than me."

"She needs you to be you. That's all she needs. It's you she wants to be with." He pauses, and for a moment his foot brushes accidentally against hers. They both look down, their limbs a ghostly blue from the pool light. "You know, you don't always have to be Wonder Woman. Sometimes, you're allowed to be selfish. You're allowed to want things and be upset and... you don't always have to be doing things for other people." He drops the pizza back in her lap, and after rolling her eyes, she begins to eat it. "Things like giving up your food when you're obviously hungry."

"I've got to look after Mackenzie." Kate murmurs, ignoring his comments.

"And what about when she moves out. What then?"

Kate flinches, but forces herself to chew her food carefully before answering. "Dutchy, I tried the whole husband and kids thing. It doesn't work for me."

"Maybe you just... didn't try with the right person." Kate's heart starts to hammer against her ribcage as she sets her pizza down in her lap.

And although she's terrified, she forces herself to catch his eye. "Yeah, maybe." She murmurs in agreement. "But sometimes, taking that next step can be hard. When you've already got something so amazing and you'd be crushed if you made a mistake and you lost that."

"Yeah." Dutchy exhales deeply. "I'm in a pretty similar situation myself. I'm... I'm hoping she realises that we can make this work."

"And... what exactly do you want to make work?" Kate queries tentatively, and she thinks her ribcage might just break with her heart pounding. More for something to do than any hunger, she puts finishes the last of the piece of pizza, brushing the crumbs off onto her shorts.

"A family." Dutchy says decisively. "Whether that's having kids or not, or just... helping to look after the family she already has. Whether it's a million cats or just one mischievous kitty. I don't think... I  _know_ I don't expect her to be anything or anyone else other than who she already is. Because, she's amazing. She's loyal, and caring, and stubborn, and... and the most giving person I know." He turns to Kate. "And what is it you want?"

"I want..." Kate inhales for a moment, thinking of all the things she and Dutchy have talked about over the years. "I want..." She tries again, but words are failing her, and all she can think to say is, "I want you," before she closes the distance between them, pressing her lips to his.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

The next morning, neither of them talk about what the kiss means. It's almost as if they've been hurtling towards this point for weeks, months, years, and now they've hit it, neither one wants to do anything to jinx their newfound happiness. For a moment, Kate lets herself be content, smiling softly into her pillow. And then she slips out of bed and moves to the shower.

When she emerges fifteen minutes later towelling her hair dry, it's to see Dutchy sitting up in bed, hands wrapped around a coffee. Kate barely has a moment to admire his naked torso before Mackenzie rushes past into the recently occupied bathroom, muttering something along the lines of, "Thank God, I'm busting!"

"Can I help you, Ma'am?" Dutchy smirks, and Kate has a brief flashback to the last time she'd gotten caught checking him out, when he'd said those exact words. She can feel the electricity from his stare fizzing under her skin, dancing like fireworks, and she has to fight the very irresponsible thoughts flooding through her brain.

"Maybe later." Kate grins. "When we're not being stalked by a teenager."

Dutchy throws a glance towards the closed bathroom door. "Could send her out to the shops. Guarantee us about ten minutes."

Kate takes a step closer, raising an eyebrow. "And just what are we supposed to be doing in ten minutes?"

For a moment, Dutchy grins. And then he lunges forwards, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her to the bed. "This." He murmurs, closing the distance between them. For a moment he simply looks at her, and then he kisses her, one hand tangled in her hair while the other rests lightly on her hip. She hums softly, relishing in the feel of the moment. And then-

Kate just has enough time to roll off the bed and land painfully on the floor when Mackenzie opens the bathroom door, stopping at the sight of Kate on the floor. "Um..." She begins.

Kate swipes her hand under the bed, sitting up with a closed fist. "Dropped an earring." She murmurs, righting herself. "Has Malin been out today?"

* * *

"I can drive." Kate murmurs, leaning against the car door and turning matter-of-factly towards Dutchy. "If you're tired and need a rest."

Dutchy smirks, and Kate has to fight the urge to kiss it off him. "Me?" He laughs, lifting his bag into the back of the car and slamming the tailgate shut. "It's you who's the notorious car sleeper."

She rolls her eyes, trying unsuccessfully to smother her laughter. "I dozed off  _once_ yesterday!"

Dutchy scoffs, folding his arms across his chest. "More than once. And you made these soft little sounds..." He leans closer, lowering his voice to a whisper. "It was cute." For a moment their eyes meet, and Kate feels her cheeks flush. Inwardly, her stomach flips.

"Cute?" She challenges, unconsciously mimicking his position.

"Adorable." Dutchy affirms, refusing to back down. "And it's okay. I'll drive the first stint. We can change in a few hours. Sound good?"

"Perfect." Kate grins. Had his eyes always been that deep? Had his lips always been-

"Well, that's everything." Mackenzie interrupts, her sneakers crunching in the gravel. Kate glances down and sees with a mixture of amusement and irritation that Mackenzie is wearing Kate's socks.  _Evidently, the clothes stealing has already begun,_ she thinks drily. Mackenzie catches her gaze and shuffles apologetically. "I ran out of mine. I have definitely got all my stuff but because I'm paranoid you guys want to do a last check?"

"Sure." Dutchy and Kate answer in unison, both turning towards the motel room. A moment later however, Kate feels herself pulled back as Mackenzie reaches out and touches Kate's forearm.

"What?" Kate challenges, as Mackenzie raises an eyebrow and gives a look that's a little  _too_ knowing.

"Ah, what was that?" Zee waves a finger in between the spots where Kate and Dutchy had just been standing.

"What was what?"

Zee scoffs. "The whole  _I'll just subtly brush your back with my hand,_ or the  _when-I'm-not-sharing-a-motel-room-with-my-sister-we-are-so-doing-it_ stare you and Dutchy just had going on?"

"Mackenzie!" Kate splutters. "I..."

Mackenzie snaps her fingers, grinning broadly. "You made out with him! Ha! I totally called it! You're blushing like a teenage girl!"

Kate shakes her head, praying her face isn't still red. "I don't know what you're talking about."

* * *

"And you say  _Abba_ is bad." Kate clicks her tongue, reaching out to fiddle with the volume button. Dutchy swats her hand away, touching it for a fraction of a second longer than is strictly necessary before returning his hand to the steering wheel.

"It is!" He quips back, shaking his head. "It's awful."

"And this isn't?" Kate gestures to the speakers where a cacophony of sounds, all heavy guitars and throaty screams are echoing.

"But listen to this skill on the guitar!" Dutchy exclaims. "He's amazing!"

"I accept that he is a talented player. But all that is ruined by the... I wouldn't even call it a singer."

"And just who is on your playlist? Aside from  _Abba_ and  _Garbage,_ of course." He presses, lazily overtaking a car.

"I like the classics!" Kate opens the glove box and begins sorting through the stacks of CDs in there, pulling faces. "And none of this!"

"So if you could have any album right now in the world to listen to, what would it be?" His hand gropes around in the console for a moment, emerging with a red snake lolly. Kate waits until she has selected her own gummy lolly before considering his question.

"Top Five?  _Fleetwood Mac_ 's ' _Rumours', 'Dark Side of the Moon'_ of course, and... um...  _Rolling Stones' '_ _Between the Buttons'..."_ Kate ticks each of the albums off with her fingers. " _Florence + The Machine,_ and... anything by  _Gang of Youths."_

"Wow." Dutchy murmurs, letting out a low whistle. "You're a music tragedy."

"Oh, come  _on_!" Kate exclaims, slamming a palm against the dashboard. " _Dark Side of the Moon_? The greatest concept album ever-"

Dutchy scoffs. "The greatest?" He repeats. "It's pretty cliched, don't you think? Didn't pick you for a  _Rolling Stones_ fan though."

"Well, there's a lot you don't know about me."

They lapse into silence, save for the warbling from the radio, Kate fiddling with the CDs once more. Kate manages to catch Dutchy mumble something with the words  _musical education._

"So Dutchy," Mackenzie interrupts, and Kate jumps. She'd almost forgotten there was anyone else in the car. Mackenzie seems to know what Kate is thinking, because she smirks. "Yeah, still here." She leans forward and plucks a lolly from the bag, before leaning back against her seat and peering at Dutchy with a purposeful gaze. "Kate told me you pashed her."

"I..." Dutchy splutters. "I... she kissed me."

"Aha!" Mackenzie squeals from the back seat.

Kate drags a hand over her face, mumbling from behind her hand. "I hadn't told her anything." She mumbles. "But you just confirmed it."

"My bad?" Dutchy murmurs nervously, but when Kate removes her hand he's relieved to see she's laughing.

"Guess the cat's out of the bag." She mumbles, just as Malin gives a throaty mewl.

* * *

Even though they spend most of the next two days in a car together, they don't discuss their newfound relationship, due to the ever present little sister constantly cracking jokes in the backseat. For the most part Kate is okay with this, but a part of her is overanalysing everything that has happened so far, and trying to decide just how things will change. In many ways, they've lived in their own little bubble; her, Dutchy and Mackenzie. But now, returning to the place that only knew them as colleagues is terrifying her.

Tomorrow, all things going to plan, they will be back in Cairns. The closer they get to home, the more unnerved Kate feels. And while she doesn't know what they should talk about, only that they need to. So much has changed and...

"You're worrying again." Mackenzie murmurs, breaking through Kate's reverie. Kate jolts, realising that she's been holding a chip half-way to her mouth for several minutes. Kate whips her head around, but Mackenzie grins. "He went to get another water jug." She leans closer. "You don't need to worry, you know."

Deciding it's pointless to play dumb, Kate drops her chip back to her plate and shakes her head. "Everything is changing."

Mackenzie shrugs. "Things don't stay the same forever."

"But I just..." Kate reaches out. "Maybe I should've just..."

"Just what? Pretended you weren't totally and irrevocably in love with him? Kate, can you honestly tell me you're not happy?"

"Of... of course, I'm happy."

Mackenzie leans forward, plucking a chip from Kate's plate. "Then let yourself be happy."

* * *

She wakes before the sun the next morning and, not wanting to interrupt the soft snores from Mackenzie or Dutchy, she dresses silently and ducks out of the room. With no destination in mind she wanders aimlessly, eventually finding herself at a playground. The bark chips crunch underfoot as she moves forwards, settling herself in one of the two swings.

"You'd say I'm overthinking it, Mum." Kate murmurs. "You'd say I'm a worry guts or that I was too ungrateful to see the good things I've got." She closes her eyes and rests her head against the thick metal chain. "But I don't want to lose him."

The only answer is the rustling of the leaves, but she can't say she expected a response. Even when she was alive, Debbie was never exactly the best advice giver, leaving Kate to learn from  _Dolly Doctor,_  the libraryand TV.

She feels Dutchy before she sees him, but his voice still makes her jump. "You're having second thoughts." He murmurs as he takes the swing next to her, smiling in a troubled sort of voice.

"Not about this. Not about... us." She hastens to make clear. It feels odd to use the word 'us', and Dutchy doesn't miss how she stumbles on it.

"Kate, if you're... I'm not going to push you into anything you don't-"

"That's not it." Kate cuts him off, shaking her head. "I just... it's like... well, we've been in our own little bubble, haven't we? And now we're going back to people who know us and-"

"You're embarrassed?"

"No! I'm... I'm scared you'll realise that I'm not what..." She trails off. "Dutchy, I'm older than you. You're young and... and you've got your whole life... I mean, what are you going to do when..."

"I do know you're older than me. It's five years. Big deal."

"It might not matter now, but what about your family? And... and what about when it does matter? What are you going to do then?"

"Stick you in a nursing home. Cairns has heaps." Dutchy shrugs, smirking widely. "Oh, come on, Kate! We're not at walking sticks and prune juice yet."

"I'm being serious."

"So am I." Dutchy counters. "You are the one I want to be with. And the only thing anyone else will be thinking is just how lucky I am."

* * *

They get through the entirety of  _Dark Side of the Moon_ and half of  _Rolling Stones_ before Dutchy starts to tease her about her music again. As she defiantly flicks her phone to  _Fleetwood Mac,_ Dutchy begs her to change it. The morning is interspersed with a soundtrack of  _Garbage,_ _Jefferson Airplane, The Clash_ and  _Creedence Clearwater Revival._

"Okay." Dutchy concedes, as Kate sings softly to  _Bad Moon Rising._ "I don't actually hate this song."

"Did we just agree on something to do with music?" Kate laughs.

"It seems we might have." He concedes. "But I'm driving next and I'll get you back for the  _Fleetwood Mac."_

* * *

By the time they reach Cairns, the sun is setting and Kate's stomach is sore from laughing. Malin skirts past her ankles as soon as she unlocks her house, Dutchy hovering. Mackenzie peers between the two of them. "Are you staying?"

"I... uh..." Dutchy begins, glancing at her. "I... I'd better give you girls some time to yourselves." Part of Kate wants to scream at him not to go, but instead she nods dutifully.

"I'll leave you two to say goodbye." Mackenzie murmurs, slipping past Kate. After checking over her shoulder for lurking teenagers, Kate turns to Dutchy.

"These last few weeks..." She begins, but she finds she can't quite put into words the gratitude she's feeling.

"I know." Dutchy responds.

"I..."

His hand brushes against her back. "Spend the night with Zee, okay?"

He squeezes her shoulder for a moment before turning to go. "Dylan!" She calls, surprising even herself with the determination in her voice. He stops and turns around.

"I don't think I've ever heard you call me Dylan." He muses as Kate moves quickly to him.

"Thanks for everything." She murmurs, and she presses her lips to his.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

For a moment the next morning, Kate stretches out and relishes being back in her own bed. The sunlight is filtering through the curtains, and Kate judges by the light it must be close to eight hundred hours.  _A sleep in,_ she muses happily. A moment later, her contentedness turns to fear as she's charged by something dark and furry.

"Malin!" She cries, heart still pounding as she sits up, fumbling for the cat. "Get off my bed! You're not supposed to be in here! Come on!" Padding out in her pyjamas and cursing the black cat, Kate heads down to the kitchen.

"Morning." Mackenzie murmurs, perched cross-legged in an armchair, a piece of toast in one hand and a book in the other. Malin mewls happily at sight of his mistress and leaps happily into her lap. "What was the screaming?"

"Your cat." Kate groans, flashing the cat a glare before heading to the kitchen for coffee. "If he destroys my furniture, he's an outside cat." She warns.

"Oh, come on, Kate, he's only a baby!" Mackenzie follows Kate into the kitchen, cradling Malin as though he's a child. "And he's been stuck in a travel cage for most of the last few days."

Kate holds up her empty coffee mug and points to the feline. "Cat does  _not_ come before coffee. Okay?" Malin offers only a soft mewl in return. "So today I thought we could try and get you settled. Unpack your stuff... figure out what you've got and if we need anything we can stop by the shops." Although Kate has no real inclination to leave the house any time soon, she wants Mackenzie to feel at home. "Unless you wanted to go somewhere else? We can do some touristy stuff before I go back to work next week too. There's Kuranda and the Daintree..."

"It's okay." Mackenzie murmurs, her smile not as present as it had been a moment ago, and Kate wonders whether Zee had taken her comments towards Malin seriously.

"It's really no trouble. I... I've probably got some empty frames around if you wanted to put some pictures up or-"

"It's fine, Kate." Zee repeats, her voice a little harder. "I... I might just go get dressed."

* * *

Kate gives her half an hour, in which Kate tries unsuccessfully to distract herself with coffee, the news, checking emails, reading a book and putting a load of washing on. When she can stand it no longer, she moves quickly upstairs, taking the steps two at a time. She hovers for a moment outside the closed door, once more feeling that overwhelming sense of being a stranger in her own home.

"Zee, can... can I come in?"

"Sure." Mackenzie murmurs, and Kate pushes open the door to see Mackenzie cross-legged on her bed, boxes and bags untouched in the corner. Strange how a life can fit into boxes.

"It must be hard..." Kate observes, perching on the end of the bed. "...starting over." When she gains nothing but a shrug, she presses on. "Look, I know you said you don't want me to buy you anything, and that you don't want help but... I want you to feel comfortable here. I know... you've dealt a crap hand. And you've dealt with so much. I just... I want you to be happy. Or as happy as you can be." Mackenzie says nothing, and Kate knows she's failed. The first morning, and already Mackenzie is freezing her out. "You want me to stay or go?" It's hardly the most dignified of sentences, but Kate finds she is so utterly clueless about how to help, that any guidance she can get will aid her.

Mackenzie is silent for so long that Kate finds herself sure the girl is never going to speak again. Then, her gaze still in her lap, Mackenzie says in little more than a whisper. "Sometimes I forget."

Kate looks up, too puzzled by the comment to feel relieved that conversation had been restored. "Forget what?"

Zee looks up, and her eyes are misted with unshed tears. "I forget that she's dead." A bird twitters happily on the branch just outside the window, disturbingly whimsical.

"Oh." She has no idea what else to say.

"Being here... the first time, it was all so exciting and new and I was going home and it was almost a holiday. And now... this is  _it._  It's my life! My mother is dead, and I'm living in this... this  _beautiful_ house with beautiful things that aren't mine and I'm a stranger. I don't know how to be me without mum."

Still struck dumb for words, Kate moves to Mackenzie and hugs her instead. "I've been without Deb-  _Mum_ for so long, I... I don't know what to say. But I know something about losing people and... and it gets easier. The pain never really goes away but... but every day you remember their life instead of their death, it gets a little easier to breathe. At least, for me it did."

"You... you lost someone?"

"My... I don't know what he was. My boyfriend? My fiancee? I mean, I never said yes but... I would have. He was... he was a good guy. But then I remember how he loved chocolate mousse and barbecues, and how happy we were, and... and it's easier. Somehow. I don't understand it. But... it works. For me at least." Kate stands up, peering around the room before settling on an art print hanging on the wall behind the bed, of a magpie with a beady stare. "I always hated that picture. I got it a few years back in a Secret Santa but it's always kind of weirded me out so I hid it in here." She murmurs.

"It's creepy." Mackenzie agrees. "It's eye sort of... follows you."

Kate hums in affirmation for a moment, before pulling the frame from the wall and resting it against the dresser. "Now. I know you like orange, but is that too dark a colour to paint the walls? Or... like a feature wall?"

"Kate, it's your house."

"No." Kate shakes her head. "It's ours. And this is your room. So let's make it yours."

* * *

"I can't believe there is legitimately so much uproar about onions." Mackenzie muses, taking a bite of her sausage sandwich. "I mean, it makes no taste difference whether the onion is on top of the sausage or underneath, does it. And are people really slipping on onions. Is that a thing?"

"You've... thought about this a lot?" Kate frowns, lazily nudging the trolley forwards with one hand, a sausage sandwich clutched in her other.

"Well, it's a fascinating representation of society today. Australia is ' **outraged** '. Australia is ' **disgusted** '." Mackenzie drags her hand through the air as though unveiling a banner.

"Are you done?" Kate smirks.

Zee hesitates. "Yeah, I think I am."

"Good, 'cause you're a real chatterbox."

"Hey, I'm just pointing out the truth. Mackenzie Katie McGregor, speaker of truths." Kate stops so suddenly that Zee walks into her. "Oof. What's up? You slip on an onion?" She quips.

Kate frowns and starts walking once more. It takes a moment, and then she murmurs, "I just... I didn't know your middle name was Katie."

"Oh." Mackenzie shrugs. "Yeah. Well, she must have... she must have been thinking of you." Zee scuffs her sneakers against the concrete as the two of them keep walking. "It seems like the sort of thing we should know about each other, right? I mean, what's your middle name?"

"Violet." Kate answers simply, because it's easier than dwelling on the  _what ifs_. In another life, they could have lived together, could have grown up knowing each other and their hopes and desires. "Violet was Deb's mum. My... our grandmother."

"What was she like?"

Kate bites her lip, and the scent of jasmine seems to float in the air for a moment. "Strict." Kate answers finally. "I mean, she was lovely. But she was tough. I remember she always used to have wipes in her bag to clean my hands and face. But she was... she was funny. Sarcastic. She taught me how to play piano. Granddad was... softer. He used to sneak me sweets and read me stories. He died when I was six. And Violet only lasted a few years without him. I was eight when she died." Kate sucks in a breath. "What about you? Favourite song?"

"It's always music with you. But... um... I love  _Marina and the Diamond_ s. In here?" Mackenzie leads the way down the aisle, stopping in front of the canvases. "Is that too much?" She adds, fingering the price tag.

"I can spring $30 on canvases. What paint do you use on them? House paint or acrylic or..."

"I've got my paints in my bag." Mackenzie murmurs, picking up three twelve-by-twelve canvases.

"I didn't know you painted." Kate shifts the trolley closer so that Mackenzie can deposit her items. "What do you paint?"

Zee tips her head. "Portraits, mostly. But... I think this one is going to be abstract. I have an idea. I just... need to see if it will work."

"Cryptic." Kate smiles. "But I can't wait to see it."

* * *

The afternoon is torn apart by thunderstorms, rain lashing the windows and darkening the sky. Kate spends most of the afternoon with a kitten wrapped around her ankles, the feline evidently spooked by the noise. By the next morning the storm has blown out to sea, and Kate takes the time to retrieve all the tree branches that have blown into her backyard.

"Cairns storms are pretty intense, huh?" Zee muses, her shoes sinking in the soggy ground as she peers around at the damage.

"You ain't seen nothing yet." Kate grins. "Wait 'til cyclone season hits."

Her phone rings, and Kate digs it from her pocket, groaning inwardly when she sees the caller ID. "Ma'am?" She greets.

The moment she hears Maxine's tone, Kate knows she's about to be very unhappy. "I need you to CO one more time." Maxine says without preamble. "I'm really sorry to do this to you. I'm out the front of your house."

Kate swipes her hand on her jeans, moving towards the side gate. "Be out front in a sec." She agrees, hanging up the phone. Two minutes later she's standing in front of a very anxious looking Maxine, her hat clasped tight in her hands.

"The CO I had lined up to take your place has fallen ill, and we've got a disaster zone declared for a hundred clicks around. There's a coastal town that's copped it particularly bad, and they're completely cut off and darn-near flattened. I need all hands on deck and I need you today."

Kate throws a glance behind her, in the direction of the gate where Mackenzie is no doubt still standing. "Ma'am, I have no one to keep an eye on Mackenzie. And I know that's not your problem. I'm just..." Kate drags a hand through her hair. "I had hoped I'd get a bit more time to settle her in before working at NAVCOM and... going out on patrol?"

Maxine tosses her head irritably as though trying to shake off a fly. "Tell me about it. I'd really hoped I could keep you out of it, but I need someone to take medical supplies and several doctors, plus help coordinate search and rescue  _and_ help rebuild damn near half the town..." She shakes her head, gesturing towards the gate. "Would she stay at NAVCOM? You know... read a book or..."

"Indefinitely?" Kate presses. "Look, I don't know."

"Well, I'm sorry, Kate. But I need you there, and the crew has already been crash sailed. You all leave in an hour so we need to find a solution."

* * *

"Don't touch anything." Kate murmurs, quickening her pace along the dock. "Don't wander. Don't... basically, this is sort of illegal but Commander White and I couldn't think of anything else and..." Kate slows at the downcast look on Mackenzie's face and stops. "I'm sorry. I'm stressing. I'm just... worried about everyone else and..."

"It's okay." Mackenzie interrupts, shaking off Kate's apology. "I get it. And before you start stressing, I won't say anything about Dutchy."

"Thanks." Kate exhales, then begins to lead the way once more. "Okay, general advice... don't ask the XO Jacobi how he's doing, or feeling, or anything, unless you want to stay there for half the day. Don't annoy the RO. Try not to start a prank war with 2Dads..."

"I... sure, but-" Mackenzie murmurs, following Kate up on board towards the bridge.

"Boss!" Charge greets. "All ships company present and accounted for. Medical supplies have been loaded onboard and we're housing three doctors in Austere."

"Very good." Kate nods. "Make ready for sail." She catches the questioning glance thrown at her and rolls her eyes. "Mackenzie, Charge. Charge, Mackenzie." Kate drags a hand through her hair. "Mackenzie's... she's tagging along on the trip. Can you... spread the word so I don't have to tell every single person, but not spread it so much that the Chief of Navy finds out and Knocker and my heads end up on the chopping block?"

"Medium spreading. Got it." He pats Kate on the back. "Hope she's got a strong stomach. We're riding the storm's tail after all."

"Crap." Mackenzie murmurs under her breath.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

"How... do you... stand this?" Mackenzie whimpers, her voice echoing slightly in the small bathroom. One hand braces against the wall while the other grips the toilet, white-knuckled. "Are waves normally this big?"

"We're riding the storm's tail. It's gonna be like this for at least another couple of hours." Mackenzie lets out a weak moan and Kate winces. "Sorry." She apologises, securing Mackenzie's hair with a hair tie and placing a cool washer on the back of her neck. "I didn't think about the swell. Is your sea-sickness normally this bad?"

"I don't know." Mackenzie rests her head on her arm for a moment, lifting it just as suddenly when the boat pitches again. "I haven't been on a boat before."

"I'm sorry." Kate repeats, peering around the tiny bathroom. Mackenzie had spent more time in this room than on the rest of the ship, and if the storm kept going the way it was, it seemed unlikely she would leave it for several more hours. "Come and have something to eat? You'll feel better."

"I just... want to stay. Safer." At the last word, Mackenzie grips the toilet bowl harder. "You can go back to sleep. I'll be okay."

"Nah, I reckon I'm good right here." Kate reassures her, leaning against the opposite wall. "You must hate me right about now, hey?"

"Nah." Zee moans thickly. "But I hope Malin is scratching your boss right about now." Kate lets out a snicker as she remembers the terrified and taken aback look on Maxine's face after Kate had introduced Maxine to the cat she would be looking after until  _Hammersley_ got back.

"Probably licking her to death." Kate muses drily. "He's not exactly a guard-kitty." She settles herself more comfortably on the floor and rubs circles on Mackenzie's back. "I can read you your book if you want?"

"It's... mythology..." Mackenzie winces as the boat pitches once more.

"Well..." Kate shrugs, dragging the previously discarded book towards her. "You'll have to forgive my stumbling over the names."

* * *

By the time midnight rolls around, Kate has mispronounced at least three names, and the rocking has died out a little. Mackenzie is able to make the short distance between bathroom and the bunks, promptly collapsing on the lower bunk. Kate sits beside her until she falls asleep, then heads up towards the bridge.

As she reaches the bridge she sees Mackenzie is not the only one feeling the wild weather. Bird is distinctly pale, one hand clapped over her mouth and a bucket resting at her feet. Kate takes one look at her white-knuckled death grip on the arms of her chair and shakes her head.

"Go lie down, Bird. I'll finish your watch."

"I'm okay." Bird's voice is little more than a whimper. "I'm-"

"Bird, that's an order. Rest." Bird gives a grateful nod and dashes away down the stairs. A moment later, Kate hears the distant sound of retching.

Wincing, Kate turns to Dutchy. It's the first time she's seen him since boarding, since...  _Since you were kissing him on your front step?_ She finishes inwardly.

"How's Zee?" Dutchy breaks the silence. They hadn't talked since she'd shown up on the boat, aside from the quick warning text she'd shot him before Maxine's car had even cleared her driveway. But they'd managed the  _professional_ thing quite well, all things considered. Especially as Kate wanted nothing more than to kiss him again and- "Poor kid looked a little green when she left the bridge."

Forcing herself back to reality, Kate gives a soft smile. "She spewed up half her guts and cursed everything to do with the Navy, but she's asleep now. I asked Cook if she'd be able to check in on her every now and then."

Dutchy nods his approval of this plan. "Well, Bird made a batch of ginger cookies before we left port, so that might help settle her stomach a little more. Although they didn't seem to be doing Bird much good. Poor kid." He hesitates for a moment. "I guess this is the last thing you thought you'd be doing today?"

"You can say that again." Kate tips her head. "But I mean... aside from dragging Mackenzie over seas so stormy she's probably lost half her body weight and having to basically throw Malin at Knocker and have her feed him, I'm kind of glad. At least... I'll know this is my last patrol." She settles herself back in the seat. "I think it's easier to give it up, knowing that this is the last time. When I told Maxine I wanted a shore posting before, I... I didn't get to savour the last trip. But leaving... I think it's time."

"So being here hasn't made you want to stay?" He teases.

"What? Nostalgia of being holed up with my head down a toilet?" She smirks. "I'll miss the crew. And... the comraderie. But... the lifestyle... it's not for me anymore. Not with Zee. And... being on shore has some advantages." Her smirk returns as she peers at Dutchy. "And I wouldn't change that for the world."

* * *

"No."

"Please?"

"No!" Kate repeats, tugging her cap onto her head and pulling her ponytail through the back. "I can not have you on shore. It's... it's a disaster zone! Literally!"

"I can help!" Mackenzie protests. The halls are too narrow for her to fall into step beside Kate, so she settles on following a step behind, hot on Kate's heels. "And besides, you're the Captain. They can't argue with you." As Kate whips around to retort, Zee's eyes narrow. "Don't you trust me?"

Her irritation fades as she realises Mackenzie is seeing this in terms of trust. "Zee, of course I trust you. But I don't trust the grounds that are crumbling into the ocean, or the electrical cables that are exposed, or the corrugated iron blowing around the town." Kate takes in her sister's gaze. "You can help Bird in the galley, prepping food to distribute. Make sure she doesn't burn the ship down."

"Fine. But can I at least help her hand them out after at the evacuation centre?" Mackenzie begs.

"I..." Kate hesitates for a moment, her foot resting on the bottom step of the bridge staircase. Is this what life was to be now? A never-ending series of tough decisions? "I really do trust you." Kate promises. "I just have no idea what we're dealing with, but I know it's bad. So can you let me assess and I'll get back to you."

"Okay." Zee nods finally, and although Kate can tell she's not overjoyed with the decision, she seems a lot more content than a few minutes ago. "Be careful, okay?"

"I will." Kate nods back, before gesturing towards the boat deck. "But right now, I have a crew to muster."

* * *

"We already have two dead," It's a harsh way to start the briefing, but Kate feels she has no choice. She needs them to understand that there is the real possibility of more death, that they are doing more than collecting stray tree branches. "- a couple driving through floodwaters. We have another seventeen at least unaccounted for. Search and rescue efforts at the moment are focused around two areas." Kate fingers a map of the area. "There's an office building whose roof has semi-collapsed after a tree fell on it. At the moment there's five people still trapped inside. And there's a street with five houses that are, at the moment, still inaccessible to SES. Evacuation Centre is the local library - and there are at least two hundred families squeezed inside, all needing food, water, and some medical attention. The local clinic has been overrun with people requiring medical attention-"

She nods at Petty Officer Samantha Cook, who had taken over as medic after Swain had died. Cook met her gaze with a steely determination, and murmured a hurried, "Yes, Ma'am."

"The clean up is going to be intense, but at the moment, our efforts are surrounding human life. While there is still a chance of survival, I want Team Bravo, Team Delta and Team Romeo to help out at the office. Team X-Ray are going to try and get to the inaccessible houses. Then, we start the clean up. Bird and Cook will be heading to the library with the medical supplies and food. Point of contact on  _Hammersley_  will be Lieutenant Majors." Kate pauses. "You all have a radio. Please be conscious of using call-signs, as we're going to have a lot of different teams communicating. And team... no unnecessary risks. Be mindful of hazards. We have fallen trees, unstable buildings, exposed wires. Be careful."

"Kate!" Kate whips her head around, catching sight of Mackenzie, anxiously biting her lip. "Save some lives, okay?"

"Okay." She agrees.

* * *

The town is a mess. Everywhere Kate looks, she sees destruction and chaos. The few branches in her backyard seem like nothing more inconvenient than a broken fingernail after seeing this. How could anyone have survived this?

"First pulse you check is your own." Dutchy murmurs, and for the smallest of moments his hand brushes against hers. Kate jumps, but no one else notices anything. And so she turns to the near-flattened office building and dons her gloves.

"All right, team." She says, and she's glad to hear her voice projecting the confidence her actions lack. "Let's do this."

The first person they find is barely alive. Kate feels her stomach lurch at the blood circling her head like a halo. She looks barely older than Mackenzie. But Kate can't dwell on that. Instead, they send her off in a makeshift ambulance - a flat-bed ute with a doctor in the back - and keep digging. Within half an hour have found two more people, mercifully both alive. Kate's hands ache, her back is stiff, and she feels faint with exhaustion, but they continue to work.

They don't talk very much, but their efforts are played to a constant soundtrack of chatter through their radios, and Kate finds it washing through her brain like white noise.

_"One DOA just washed up on riverbank."_

_"Have two missing kids in the area surrounding Johnston Street."_

_"Beware of live and fallen wires when travelling around Hunter Road_."

"You should take a break." Charge stops her. "You look dead on your feet."

"I'm okay." She protests, and for the most part, she is. She didn't go to work the previous day and find herself crushed underneath her office. She didn't lose her house, her family, her life.

_"Family of five located safe and alive. Stewart and Marianne Ling. That's Lima-India-November-Golf. And three children, Maya, Zara and Nathaniel."_

"Boss..." Charge hesitates. "All due respect, you look ill."

"Charge, I... I'll feel better once this is done. I just... I need to do this, okay?"

"Okay." He nods, and they keep shifting debris.

For four more hours, they stand, necks burning in the sunshine poking its head through the clouds, sweat dripping down her neck. She knows she must look completely ragged, red-cheeked and hair flying in sweaty clumps all around her face. But it's worth it in the end, when they find the last two people in what remained of the office, alive.

* * *

"Hell of a day, huh." Charge muses as they start to walk back to the ship.

"Hell of a day." Kate agrees. "We'll get started on the cleanup tomorrow. The electric company has cut most of the power, so live wires aren't an issue any more, but..." She trails off as they both climb over a fallen tree. "Hell of a day." She repeats once more.

"So how did none of us know you had a kid?" He murmurs. "She gonna be Hammersley's new mascot or something? I mean, she would've been... what, seven or something when you started on  _Hammersley._ But none of us had a clue."

Kate glances up at him. From nearly anyone else the question would sound nosy, but Charge's face reflects only concern. Still, she can't suppress the dry laugh that bubbles up in her at the realisation everyone must have assumed Mackenzie to be a secret lovechild. "She's not my daughter. She's... she's my sister." She catches sight of Charge's face and laughs. "Yeah, pretty much my reaction when I found out. Only known her a couple of weeks. Our mother... well, she just passed away."

"I'm sorry." Charge murmurs. "So I guess that's why we got the VIP shore leave this last week?"

"Yeah." Kate nods.

"How long is she... I mean, she's living with you?"

"Yeah. A teenager and a cat." Charge gives a short bark of laughter at that, before turning serious once more.

"And  _Hammersley_? You're not coming back are you?" Charge guesses. She wonders what had given it away.

"No. Even this was a surprise patrol." She confirms, peering at him closely. "I'll tell the crew tonight. I should have told them before but with Zee getting sick..."

"It's okay." Charge assures her. "Just... we'll miss you." He murmurs, adopting a mock-serious face. "You're... well, you're alright as far as people go."

Kate can't help the laugh that bubbles from her. "Yeah." She agrees. "And you know what, Charge? You're pretty alright yourself."

* * *

She expects to find Mackenzie waiting for her return, probably already prepared with a whole new host of reasons she should go ashore. But Kate manages to board and shower without finding her. By the time she's snapped on a new uniform and secured her hair, concern and suspicion fills her. Surely she wouldn't have sneaked ashore.

"Anyone seen Zee?" Kate asks as she heads towards the bridge. The rest of the crew look as tired as her. Even with the option of Cinderella leave, most of the crew had opted to simply come back to the ship.

"Galley." RO answers simply, before turning back to his radio.

2Dads, however, is more vocal in his speech. "Seriously, Boss, can the kid stay forever?" He holds up a bowl of a creamy looking pasta dish. "She's one hell of a cook."

Kate looks around, taken aback, noticing as she does that most of the crew have some sort of dish in front of them. "She cooked?"

"Been cooking all day." 2Dads grins. "Heaps of stuff for rat packs and the community kitchen, and then she made dinner. Seriously, Boss, we should hire her."

"Aside from the fact she's only thirteen?"

"Hell, Boss, to get cooking like this every day, I'd become a teacher myself so we could school her from here."

* * *

When she heads down to the galley, Mackenzie is busy moving around the galley so fluidly it's almost a waltz. And although every part of her had wanted to just talk to Zee after the crappy day she's had, Kate finds herself resting against a wall, content to watch as Mackenzie begins to ice what looks like gingerbread men.

"Who's this one?" Bird giggles, peering down at the cookie. "Wait, let me guess. Charge?"

"Got it in one." Zee giggles, and as Kate cranes her neck, she's amazed to see that Mackenzie has decorated each gingerbread cookie as a member of the crew.

"It's easy." Bird gushes. "I have never seen gingerbread men look so... realistic. You're an artist, aren't you?"

"I paint. And..." Mackenzie looks up, catching sight of Kate. "Kate!" She grins. "Hungry? We've got pasta, or parmy, or mini-quiche, or..."

"Geez, you have been busy." Kate murmurs, as she sees the many piles of food that Bird is now sorting into ration packs, or into containers.

"I like to cook." Mackenzie blushes. "Mum was always kind of rubbish at it but I... I like recipes."

"Well," Kate looks down in amazement at the gingerbread version of herself, "you've both done amazingly."

* * *

And later that night, as Kate turns out the lamp, Mackenzie murmurs, "You know... maybe the Navy isn't so bad after all."

Kate grins into her pillow.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

"Stay with Bird." Kate says, and even though she knows she's said this several times already, she can't help but feel the need to repeat herself as Mackenzie bounces eagerly on the balls of her feet with all the eagerness of a child that's been told they can have any toy in the shop. "Don't leave the library unless you're with someone from the  _Hammersley._ Don't-"

"I  _know,_ Kate." Mackenzie's voice is nearly a whine as her eyes flicker towards the RHIB and, beyond it, the beachfront. The rain has well and truly left them behind now, so that the water sparkles invitingly. "Stay with Bird, don't leave the library, and only talk to strangers if they offer you lollies." Beside Kate, Charge chuckles lightly at her words.

"Cute." Kate mutters sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Come on, then. Put you're boarding jacket on."

Mackenzie wrinkles her nose at the item. "I know how to swim."

"Not negotiable." Kate's voice is almost sing-song as she thrusts it towards her. "And if you end up in the water, pull this tab. Got it?"

"Optimistic bunch, you lot." Now it's Mackenzie's turn to roll her eyes, pulling the boarding jacket over her head with an unimpressed look on her face. "It will be fine, Kate. What's the worst that can-"

" _Don't!"_ Mackenzie nearly jumps back in shock as RO, Bird, Charge, Dutchy and Kate all shout in unison.

"What the  _hell?_ " Mackenzie demands, one hand over her heart while the other grips the guardrail. Her eyes are almost as wide as Bird's normally are, but soon her shock turns to irritation. "Have you all gone mad?"

Kate, RO, Charge and Bird all move towards the RHIB, but Dutchy seems to take pity on Zee, moving towards her and patting her ruefully on the back. "First rule of Navy." He explains, and it's the first time Mackenzie has seen him so serious. "You. Never. Say.  _That."_

* * *

"Mark my words,  _something_ is going to happen." Charge grumbles, shifting the hammer in his hands as he positions the nail. "Something  _bad._ "

"Charge!" Kate groans, dropping the nail she'd been holding. "Enough, alright! You're complaining so much you sound like-"

"RO?" Charge finishes, grinning cheekily at her.

Kate smirks. "Your words, not mine." She takes a moment to retie her hair and take a swig of water from her canteen, peering around at the town from her high vantage point. All around her is a buzz of movement. There are people dragging branches from front lawns, people relaying roof tiles. There are people repairing glass, laying tarps or sweeping out floodwater. There's the sound of chainsaws as fallen trees are cut up, and the distant booming of music from one of the workman's radios.

"How did I get stuck with you, anyway?" Kate frowns. "I mean, I can hit a nail with a hammer... most of the time... but in terms of who you'd pick to help re-secure a school hall roof..."

"Probably just luck." Charge grins. "Plus, you're the lightest. Least likely to collapse the roof any further while we're both up here." She peers out at the town below. If she just cranes her neck, she can see the white roof of the library, where Mackenzie is now, alongside Bird and Cook (who, it transpired after an incident in the galley her first week, could absolutely  _not_ cook). "Mind you..." Charge continues cheekily. "It seems only one of us is working and the other is taking in the coastal views."

"Oy!" Kate snaps, turning back to him and flourishing a hand in the direction of the roof below her feet. "I've already laid out the materials you'll need for the next five sheets of corrugated iron. Not my fault someone only remembered to bring  _one_ hammer along and has to stop and have a whinge about how Mackenzie has single-handedly doomed the  _Hammersley."_

"Yeah, yeah." Charge punctuates each word with a hit from the hammer. When he's confident his latest sheet is secure he turns back to Kate, wiping a bead of sweat from his forehead. "So, what are you going to do on your shore posting?"

"I don't know exactly. Something to do with an ethics investigation. Something mind-numbingly boring I assume." She nods at him, grinning. "Come on, Charge. Want to be down from here before the next storm season hits."

* * *

Mackenzie spends most of the day alternating between making cup after cup of strong, sweet tea, and listening to the stories from different members of the community. They're mostly the same - stories of treasured items lost, of cars washed away, of houses still rendered inaccessible by flood waters. For the most part, Mackenzie lets them talk, because she knows that sometimes just saying the words is half the battle, and she's happy to be the one who listens.

"You're doing really well." Cook squeezes her arm reassuringly, smiling down at her from between her orange, flyaway hair. Cook had come with them to do medical checkups on those non-trauma related illnesses, to help reduce the strain of the doctors and the local clinic.

"They've struggled so much." Mackenzie murmurs, and almost immediately her eyes pick out the teenager she'd spoken to earlier that morning, with the long honey-coloured hair, sitting alone. Cook catches her gaze and frowns.

"That girl... is she here alone?"

Mackenzie nods. "Her name's Connie. She's fifteen. Her... her parents were the couple who were... well, they tried to cross floodwater to get into town."

Cook gives a low whistle. "Poor kid."

"She says her grandparents are coming. They're just still stuck until the roads are back." Mackenzie gives a weak smile that doesn't reach her eyes. "I was talking to her for a while. About... well, about Mum."

Once more, Cook gives her arm a reassuring squeeze. "Mackenzie, if this gets too much-"

"No." Mackenzie's eyes burn with a hard, blazing look as she peers around at the families who had lost so much. "I'm here. And I can help."

Cook looks as though she's about to say something, but a moment later they're interrupted as someone joins them. "Hey." Bird balances two empty crates on her hip. "I'm gonna head back to the ship to grab more bottled water. I'm gonna grab a lift back to the wharf with the cops there. Should be back within 30 minutes. Are you right here, Cook?"

"Yeah, I'll be good. Better get back to it, actually." Her bright head of hair soon disappears into the crowd.

"You want to come?" Bird asks, jabbing a thumb at the door. "Something to do?"

Mackenzie forces a smile, her eyes finding Connie once more. "Nah, I think... I'm good to stay."

"No worries." Bird smiles. "See you soon."

* * *

Dutchy rubs the back of his neck with a hand, wincing as he feels the heat the sun has burned into him. "Sun's killing me." He complains, picking up the chainsaw once more.

"I did advise you to use sunblock, Dutchy." RO remonstrates. "You know, the UV index is supposed to be 11.6 this after-"

In response, Dutchy starts up the chainsaw, blocking out the rest of RO's words as he continues to cut up the large tree that had blocked the main road. He glances up briefly, just in time to see RO roll his eyes and continue to fiddle with the generator. At least to Dutchy's eyes, not much had been done by RO the time they had been here, other than a significant amount of whinging. However, Dutchy had to concede that he wasn't too familiar with the ways of electronic repair.

The next time he stops the chainsaw, in order to move two large trunk segments out of his way, it's to see RO still looking irritated in his direction. "You still haven't fixed that?"

RO speaks his next words as though Dutchy is an incredibly overemotional child. "A. Tree. Fell. On. It."

Dutchy waves a flourish in the direction of the tree he'd been cutting up for most of the morning. "I never would have guessed."

" _Help!"_ RO's retort is swallowed as they both look up and run towards the teenager now staggering towards them. At first, Dutchy thinks her hair is dyed dark red. Then he realises with a stab of panic that it's been stained by blood. He reaches her first, nearly catching her as she stumbles. He sits her down on the gutter, peering at her.

"What happened?" He asks. "Where are you hurt?"

But the girl is shaking her head. "My... I was babysitting. My... the kids... We fell."

"Fell?" Dutchy repeats. "Fell where?"

* * *

A hand slaps on the counter behind her, and Mackenzie has to bite back the growl of irritation. Couldn't people seriously just understand that she couldn't make water boil any faster than the kettle can. But the hand slaps once more, and Mackenzie looks up. "Zee! Where's Bird?!" Dutchy's face is red and puffed, but she supposes that's not to be surprising when he's been out in the sun all- "Zee!" He shouts again! " _Bird!_ "

"She's not here. What's happened?" Her stomach turns to lead.  _"_ Kate-"

Dutchy swears loudly. Several people look around to glare at him. "We've got two kids stuck on a rocky ledge and we need someone small and light to lower down, because there's not enough solid ground or time to get a winch, and Bird has gone back to the bloody ship!" Already Dutchy is turning to run from the library once more, people parting to let the angry, swearing man through.

"Dutchy, wait!" Mackenzie stumbles in his wake as he dashes towards a ute driven by two men Mackenzie doesn't recognise. Locals, probably.

"We need to get to the wharf! Fast! The ledge is crumbling and the kids are agitated."

"No." Mackenzie cries. She leaps up into the tray of the ute alongside Dutchy, leaning to shout at the driver. "Take us to the kids!" Then she turns to Dutchy. "Send... Send me. I'm lighter."

The ute starts to move fast, Mackenzie only just clinging on as they make their way the short distance towards the barrier of the cliff walk. "I can't send you. Kate will kill me!"

"We don't have time to argue! You need someone light enough to lower down and you need them now." This time it's Mackenzie who slams her hand down. Dutchy curses again, but says nothing more as the car tears around one final corner and screeches to a halt. Both Mackenzie and Dutchy leap out, Zee landing cat-like on the ground. "Where are we going?"

"This way." Dutchy dashes up the clifftop walk fast, but Mackenzie is hot on his heels. When they reach the top, it's to see RO, white as a sheet and peering over the edge, calling out.

"Stay there! Alright, kid! Just stay there." He catches sight of Dutchy and Mackenzie. "Where the hell is Bird?"

"You got me." Mackenzie growls, already vaulting the barrier. Before she can peer downwards, Dutchy pulls her back and tugs a rope around her waist and ties it into a complicated sort of knot. "Zee, we don't have a harness. It's-"

"I know." Mackenzie cuts him off. "I trust you."

Dutchy looks as though he's doing this against his better judgement. Which, Mackenzie reflects, is probably true. "This will hold but..." He hesitates. "It's not rope that's made for climbing. It's..."

"Don't dawdle." Mackenzie finishes. "I know." And before she can feel even the slightest bit of panic, she steps over the edge. Although she knows Dutchy and RO and whoever the drivers of the ute were are holding the rope, counterbalancing her weight, Mackenzie still feels her stomach lurch with that first step, and for a moment everything in her body tells her that she is going to fall.

A moment later, Zee's trainers slides on the slippery rock as she attempts to climb down. She curses, holding onto the rope with all her strength, but she twists, scraping her right arm heavily againet the rock. "You okay?" Dutchy calls.

Mackenzie flexes her fingers. The joints move without pain. Just the stinging of cold, salty air against her exposed and bloody forearm. "Yeah." She calls back. "Keep going." If she was to fall now, she'd tumble right into the sea. Would she hit rocks, or smack into water? Drown, or splat?

_There are kids here._  Mackenzie forces herself to think.  _There are kids that need you._ And as she clears a clump of weeds that scratch her legs, she sees them. Two boys, maybe two and four. On an impossibly tiny ledge that looks no bigger than a coffee table.

"Hey." Mackenzie greets, trying to keep her voice from warbling. "I'm Mackenzie. Zee. I'm going to help you get out of here." There's a clatter, and as Mackenzie looks down she sees several pieces of rock crumble and fall. The ledge looked as though it would follow any second. "Stop!" She cries out above her, and she feels the rope tug tighter around her, so that she hangs, suspended a few inches above the ledge. "Uh," They're both sitting, although the younger of the two seems to be more slumped against the rock behind. "Are you hurt?"

"Lachy's arm banged." He mumbles, turning to his younger brother. As Mackenzie looks closer, she sees the bone exposed, and fights the nausea rising in her.

"Okay," She forces herself to keep calm, searching for any sort of knowledge that could help her. "What's your name?"

"Luke." He mumbles, still looking at his brother. "Is he dead?"

"No." Mackenzie says with a defiance she doesn't feel. "No, he's not." More rocks clatter. "Luke, I'm going to grab you, and we're going to go up."

Luke is still looking at his brother. "What about Lachy?"

Mackenzie wouldn't be able to carry them both. And it would make more sense to take the older, the heavier first, wouldn't it? Or should she take the injured? The boys could have internal injuries too. What if- "I'll... I'll come back for him." Rocks above her are starting to crumble. Was it always this windy? "We need to go." Mackenzie repeats. "Luke, I-"

But there's a horrendous cracking, and Mackenzie reacts instinctively. She leans down and seizes a fistful of each boy's shirt in either hand, just as most of the ledge crumbles. She feels her gravity tip, and suddenly she's face-down, staring into Luke's terrified face as he shouts. Lachy is little more than a dead weight in her hands. No. Not dead weight.  _Don't let him be dead._

"Mackenzie!" Dutchy shouts, and she knows he must have heard the crack. "Mackenzie!"

"Pull us up now!" Mackenzie bellows back, redoubling her grip on their shirts. "Luke, grab my arm. Hold on."

"I can't." The little boy mumbles. "I can't."

"You have to. Do it! You can do it. I'm holding your shirt. Grab my arm and hold on." Had her hands always been this sweaty? Was that the fabric ripping. "Hurry!" She shouts.

She's moving, but not fast enough. If her hands slip...

Luke makes a grab for her arm and misses. She feels his shirt pull tighter. Her shoulders are being wrenched out of her sockets. She's sure that they will snap off, that the rope will break, that they'll all crumble in the sea.

"Dutchy!" She screams again. "Dutchy, now! RO!"

Her legs scrape against rock. A moment later, she's spitting dirt from her face as part of the cliff scrapes her face, and she blinks something out of her eyes that could be tears or blood, she doesn't know. "Dutchy! RO!"

She's going to die. She's going to die, not like Debbie, shrouded in peace and with family. No, she's going to die here, dangling above the most beautifully murderous landscape.

And then, just as she thinks it's all over, hands are grabbing at her, grabbing Luke and Lachy, and she feels herself tugged upwards and placed on soft, wet earth.

* * *

"I'm fine." Mackenzie murmurs, even though her heart is still pounding in her chest so hard she thinks it might just burst from her chest. "I'm fine."

"No, you're not." Dutchy murmurs. "You're a mess." He presses something to her face that makes her hiss and wince, but after the moment of pain she feels it cooling against her scrapes. "You're chock full of adrenaline and you're covered in blood."

"It's superficial." She repeats the assessment of the paramedics. "I'm okay." She wonders whether she's ever been less okay in her life. "Are Luke and Lachy going to be okay?"

"You saved 'em. Bit of dehydration, food and a cast for the little one, but... paramedics say they should be okay." Dutchy reassures her, but she still wonders whether Dutchy is lying to spare her any more negativity after what just happened.

"How did they get there?" She asks the question more so to stop the  _what ifs_  floating in her head, but thankfully, Dutchy hastens to fill her in.

"Babysitter said after the storm had hit, they came up here to see what the town was like. Part of the track crumbled and they ended up there. The girl was able to climb up but she couldn't get to the boys, so she ran for help." Dutchy explains. He pulls the cloth away from her face and winces. "You're going to be okay. Just have some pretty intense scabs in a few days time." He winks at her. "Hope you didn't have a hot date lined up."

"Yeah, me and Malin and Netflix." Mackenzie frowns. "Please tell me Kate has Netflix."

"She steals off my account and thinks I don't notice." Dutchy smiles. "But I logged in once at her place and I'd never watch half the crap that ends up in my  _Continue Watching._ " The humour does the trick, taking her out of her panic, but it stings her face to smile.

"Mackenzie!" There's the sound of a car door slam, and Mackenzie looks up just in time to catch a glimpse of Kate before she's enveloped by her.

"Ouch!" She winces. Kate pulls away quickly. For a moment, she seems to be appraising Mackenzie. And then she spins around.

"What the hell happened?!" She demands, glaring at Dutchy.

"They needed someone to-" Mackenzie begins, but Kate takes a step closer to him, eyes burning with fury.

"Do not  _ever_ come near her again!" Kate bellows, jabbing him in the chest with a finger. "She could have been killed!"

"Ma'am-" Dutchy begins, but Kate cuts him off, approaching so fiercely that Dutchy actually takes a step back.

"She is my sister! Not a piece of equipment. You want to risk someone's life by dangling them off a cliff with a fraying piece of rope, you bloody well hang there yourself!"

"Kate-" He tries, his voice cracking slightly.

"No!" Kate growls, and she looks quite deranged. "We have nothing else to talk about." She wraps an arm around Mackenzie's shoulder, pulling her away. "Stay the hell away from us!"


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

"You know, Boss..." Charge begins, as the two of them load up the day's provisions into the back of a four wheel drive. Already it's shaping up to be a humid day. Thankfully, Kate doesn't anticipate being in the heat too long. Already, most of the town's roads have been cleared and power have been restored, although it was anticipated it would take another couple of days until the road into town would be usable once more.  _And then, you leave._ She finishes in her head.  _You leave, and you never work on Hammersley again._ "Boss?" Charge clears his throat delicately. "I know it's none of my business-"

"I'm sensing a 'but'." Kate cuts in, and there's an edge to her voice that causes even Charge's eyes to widen just a little. But she's known Charge for years, and he knows her well enough to realise she probably won't berate him. Of course, she knows what he's going to say, because it's what Mackenzie has already told her, what Dutchy had begged through her closed cabin door. Even RO had hastened to reassure her that  _Mackenzie was in no real harm. Dutchy was just using the resources at hand,_ although Kate had quickly silenced him.

"You should talk to Dutchy." Charge continues, proving Kate's suspicions right. Kate rolls her eyes, turning back to the pile of provisions still to load. "Boss, the... the poor guy is beating himself up about it all. I mean, even RO reckoned you should have seen the knot Dutchy tied onto her, and he's not exactly one to make up facts. She was in no danger of falling." Charge deposits a large box easily into the tailgate and turns back to Kate, who is furiously chewing her tongue. "I'm only saying because I always tell it to you straight." He crouches down slightly so that he can look her in the eye. "From what I've seen, you guys were mates."

"You're right." Kate drops her next box with more force than is strictly necessary, glaring at Charge. "It really is none of your business."

* * *

The rest of the crew seem too scared to say anything else about the ongoing feud between their Captain and their Bosun. Or at least, no one else says anything to her face. She's sure she must be the subject of intense gossip though, judging by the amount of times she walks into a room and finds herself in sudden silence. She keeps to her cabin mostly, when she's not on watch, and out of something that could be pity or loyalty, Mackenzie spends quite a lot of time there too, reading when Kate does paperwork, or else watching DVDs on Kate's laptop.

Although every part of her wants to keep Mackenzie on the boat, Kate knows that would only cause her more trouble from Zee, so she agrees that Mackenzie can head back to the library, under Cook's guidance. "Call me every hour." Kate growls, as she tugs the lifejacket over Mackenzie's head. Mackenzie had been telling her to move on, insisting that she was fine, but Kate's stomach turned cold every time she caught site of the side of Zee's face and arms rubbed raw from the rock.

Mackenzie frowns. "Ah, Kate? I... I don't have a phone." She says eventually, and Kate feels herself stop short.

"You're thirteen." Is all Kate can think to say. "I... I thought every kid got an iPhone when they hit... ten or something?"

"We are the digital age." Mackenzie smirks, before turning serious. "But I never really needed one before. I mean, my best friend lived down the street, and we had a landline." She catches Kate nibbling her lip once more. "I'll stay at the library. You can radio Sammie and check in." It takes Kate a moment to register who  _Sammie_ is, before realising that Cook's first name was Samantha, and another few before she realises Mackenzie is scared she's going to go back on their agreement.

"Okay." Kate swallows. Behind her, she hears a hatch open, and she whips her head around. But it's just Cook, her medical bag slung over one shoulder. Kate watches as she smiles at them both, then moves out of their line of vision towards the RHIBs.

"Have you talked to Dutchy?" Mackenzie presses. Kate says nothing, feeling the same fury bubbling in her as when Charge had brought him up, and almost automatically, she peers around as though looking for eavesdroppers. "Kate!" Mackenzie seizes her arm, forcing Kate to turn around. "He only did it because I insisted. It's not his fault."

But Kate can't shake the image of a snapped rope, and three crumpled and broken bodies. "Leave it, Mackenzie!" Kate snaps. She turns in the direction that Cook had travelled, and after a moment, follows in her wake. "It's over."

* * *

For the next three days, Kate manages to put enough distance between her and Dutchy that she barely has to speak with him. Charge or the XO Jacobi become messenger between her and the bosun, and on the rare occasions she has to talk to him, she makes sure to call him  _Petty Officer,_ emphasising his rank like an insult. In any case, he seems to have given up on trying to justify himself to her, although she knows that he's not done yet. Their last night ashore, Kate grants them all Cinderella leave and gathers them at the pub, save for Dutchy, who is (not completely randomly) placed on duty watch, and Charge, who volunteers to stay along too.

There, she eats and talks with them all, Mackenzie stealing chips off her plate and Kate retaliating by taking a slice of pizza in return. Only when they've eaten does Kate tell them all that this will be her last patrol.

Bird, 2Dads and many of the other junior sailors gasp and protest, but she sees the senior crew members all nodding as though they'd expected nothing less. And although her heart is aching and all she wants to do is cry, she forces a smile and tries to enjoy her last night as part of the  _HMAS Hammersley_  crew.

* * *

"How do you feel?" Maxine asks, after Kate has handed over piles and piles of reports. Her hand feels as though it's about to fall off, but there's a strong sense of satisfaction when the heavy stack of papers leave her hand. For reasons she can't quite explain, though, Kate has omitted any documentation about Dutchy's rescue attempt.

Kate barely stifles a yawn. "Like I should be handing a set of keys back or something. It's such an... anti-climactic finish."

Maxine smirks. "Well, with your ship's record, it is somewhat surprising that this patrol was completely free of traffickers, murderers, pirates, gold thieves and terrorists." She quips, bundling the reports together in a no-nonsense sort of way before running a critical eye over Kate. "How are  _you_?"

Kate gives a wry smile, sinking back further into her chair. "Exhausted." She admits. "Ready to go home and sleep for a thousand years. Mackenzie's already crashed out in the car."

Maxine chuckles good-naturedly. "Ah, yes. Well, on that note, here are your house keys back. That cat is a demon. You can keep him." Kate lets out a snort of laughter that she has no hope of trying to pass off as a cough or sneeze, but Maxine just rolls her eyes.

"What'd he do?" Kate asks, resigning herself to the worst, scratches or escape attempts at the very least. "Did he attack you?"

"No, thankfully. But he's worse than a toddler on a sugar rush. He kept blending into the shadows and then jumping out at me." Maxine smiles. "And I'm allowing you that chuckle only because you've earned it. Now go home and get some rest. You've got a four-day-weekend before you start here so spend some time with that sister of yours. And Kate..." Maxine waits until Kate has looked back. "Thanks."

* * *

She'd expected the knock on the door from the moment she'd gotten home, knowing that there was just no way Dutchy would just leave her be. But as she checks the mail and the answering machine, she can't quite figure out if she wants him to come or not.

She'd intended to head home and sleep, but she finds her head too full of buzzing thoughts for a nap, and instead busies herself in Mackenzie's room, moving furniture into the hallway so that they can start to paint. Mackenzie is back to her chatterbox self, seemingly rejuvenated from her thirty minute catnap, and babbles endlessly about her plans for the room.

"I'm thinking I want to just do an orange feature wall here, and then the white on the other walls." Mackenzie grins, pointing at each wall in turn. "A bright orange. Warm and sunny."

"Sounds good." Kate mumbles, her mind drifting back to Dutchy. She wonders vaguely what he's doing now, whether he's drowning his sorrows at the pub, or whether he's already found someone else. Or maybe that was just Kate's game. Fixing her broken heart with the affection of another.  _No. I'm not like that anymore._ But then another voice chimes in, darker, crueller.  _But if Mackenzie wasn't here, where would you be? You'd have fallen apart like you always do._

"And I was thinking I could get some orange curtains too. Like a pop of colour so the rest of the room isn't too bland."

"Yeah." Kate nods, forcing a smile. "Sounds great."

Mackenzie's eyes narrow. "And I'm thinking I want a giant shirtless photo of RO up here too, because he's pretty cute, don't you think?"

"Okay." Kate murmurs, her mind still far away.

"Kate!" Mackenzie prompts, snapping her fingers. "You're completely off in your own head."

"Sorry." Kate apologises, looking up at Mackenzie. "Sorry, Zee. It's not you. Just a bit..." She trails off, frowning. "Did you say you thought RO was cute?"

"Just testing to see if you were listening." Mackenzie snorts with laughter. "Are you able to help with the bedside table?"

Kate nods, moving over to the forementioned furniture. Had she felt like this when Mike left? She supposes she must have, but Mike had always seemed to be a love interest. Dutchy on the other hand...

He'd been her best friend.

"You could call him." Mackenzie points out, and Kate jolts upright, nearly dropping the bedside drawers in her surprise. When she's recovered her balance, and she and Mackenzie have placed the drawers in the hallway, Kate pushes her hair from her face. "You miss him." Mackenzie presses.

"Don't." Kate warns, feeling a headache building in her temple. "Let's get this done."

"Kate, I... I think you need to talk to him."

"Mackenzie, please."

"You've been looking at your phone every five minutes. Who else are you waiting on?"

"I'm... can I just be pissed off without everyone interfering?!" Kate takes a step back and nearly trips over Malin. "And why is this damn cat always at my ankles?"

Mackenzie opens her mouth to respond, but stops as the sounds of a bike engine interrupt them. Mackenzie glances between her and the front of the house. "Go and answer the door." She urges, and when Kate says nothing more, Mackenzie continues. "Answer the door, or I will."

"I don't want to talk to him." Kate's voice is low and dangerous, but Mackenzie takes no notice of her.

"Kate, you need to-"

"I don't need to do anything!"

"Answer the door or I will!" Mackenzie repeats, her arms folded, and for a moment it's almost like looking into the mirror. Mackenzie has that same glare Kate uses when she wants something to get her way.

Kate lets out a frustrated sound, somewhere between a snarl and a growl. "Stay here." Cursing Mackenzie's stubbornness and swearing as her foot hits each step on the way down to the front door. She wrenches it open to see Dutchy, hand poised to knock.

"I told you to stay away." She spits without preamble. And Kate's voice is ice, because there's no room for warmth here. She can't let him in.

"Kate." Her entrance had taken him by surprise. She can tell that, if he'd had it his way, he'd have had more time to prepare, to organise his excuses. "Kate, she wanted to help. She asked."

"She's thirteen!" Kate explodes. "She's a child! And you put her at risk!"

"She wouldn't have fallen. I wouldn't have let her." He puffs out his chest a little, as though  _this_ is something to be proud of.

"No?" Kate challenges. "What about the kids? What if Mackenzie wasn't able to hold them? Would you have her scarred for life watching two kids plummet to their deaths?"

Dutchy's face falls. "I didn't-"

"No, you didn't think. That's the point! You didn't see her as a person. You didn't see her as a kid who'd just watched someone die and doesn't need any more trauma in her life. You saw her as a tool. As a piece of equipment. You went behind my back and you broke my trust!"

His mouth opens and shuts for several long seconds, and then he takes a step closer. Are they tears in his eyes too? "Kate, don't... don't throw away what we have-"

"What we  _have_?" Kate repeats, and she wants to wound him. She wants him to feel as bad as she is. "What? Making out a few times?"

Dutchy looks, if possible, even more upset. "Don't. Don't cheapen it like that. We need to talk."

Kate moves to close the door. "We've got nothing to talk about."

"I love you!" The words hit her like a dagger, and she actually staggers back. For a moment, she hears the words ringing around in her head. "I love you and I love her and I never wanted to hurt either of you."

"Love..." Kate's voice cracks on the word. And for a moment she wants to forgive him, to fall back into his arms. "Love isn't sacrifice. You don't... you don't put the people you love at risk. That's not love."

"Kate..." He reaches out for her, but she takes a step back. "Kate, please."

"No." Kate clears her throat. "We've got nothing more to talk about." She takes a deep breath. "We're done."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Kate leans heavily against the door as she listens to Dutchy ride away, the fading sounds of the motorbike engine piercing her heart like a dagger.  _Fight for me,_ she wants to scream. She wants him to come back. If he came back, she'd know he was serious. If he just came back, she'd know...

_I love you!_

But then she remembers Mackenzie, dangling from the side of a cliff, and her resolve strengthens. It's not just her anymore. And she can't lose Mackenzie too. Footsteps interrupt her thoughts, and Kate drags a hand over her face. "I don't need another lecture, Mackenzie." She calls out from between her fingers. She can't bear to look at Zee, doesn't want the pity or the disgust or whatever else she's sure to see in the teenager's face.

"I wasn't here for that." Mackenzie murmurs softly. The young girl hesitates for a fraction of a second, before taking a seat next her her, so that both their backs are pressed against the door in some bizarre parody of barricading themselves in. "I'm sorry."

And despite all her anger, Kate feels herself crumple. The weight of the last few weeks presses on her, until she can barely breathe. "He told me he loved me." Any other time, Kate would feel embarrassed at the weakness in her voice. But she's just so scared. "He told me he loved me and I told him to go."

"It's going to be okay." Mackenzie murmurs, wrapping an arm around Kate's shoulders. "I know it doesn't feel like it now, but it will." Mackenzie's warmth is comforting. Kate leans into her touch, closing her eyes.

"What do I do now?"

"Now?" Mackenzie murmurs, as Kate rests her head on Mackenzie's shoulder. "Right now, we sit here, until you're ready to get up. And then, you grab the tub of macadamia icecream from the freezer and two spoons, we put in a food delivery, and we sit on the lounge all afternoon and watch as many DVDs as we can. And you'll cry a little and I'll probably cry too, but when you wake up tomorrow, it'll feel a little less painful."

Kate lets out a sob, and although she knows it's foolish and selfish to be drawing comfort from Mackenzie, she finds herself seeking the reassurance she so desperately needs. "Promise?"

"Yep." Mackenzie affirms. "You don't have to make any decisions now. Today, we can hide from the world."

"I thought you'd tell me to call him or something." Kate hiccups. Mackenzie rubs circles on Kate's back. The feeling is oddly maternal, and Kate feels a pang of loss. She can't remember Debbie ever comforting her like this.

"If that's what you want to do, then we'll do that. But for now, take some time, okay?"

Kate nods softly, drawing her knees up to her chest. "Okay." She repeats.

* * *

Kate wakes on the lounge the next morning, a blanket half-tangled around her legs, a cat curled up on her chest and her eyes red and puffy. Stroking the cat's fur lightly, she peers around for Mackenzie. Malin gives a soft mewl and leaps lightly from her chest, leaving Kate free to sit up. "Zee?" Kate calls out, her voice slightly hoarse. "You here?"

"Upstairs!" Mackenzie calls back, and Kate makes her way upstairs. Mackenzie is dressed in a plain black  _Garbage_ shirt that hangs almost to her knees, and a pair of tights. "Hey." She greets, dropping her cloth back in the bucket of sugar soap. "Just wiping down the walls and getting ready to paint. How are you?"

Kate hesitates for a moment. "Better." She settles on, and she finds it's not exactly a lie. She's still upset, yes, but the night spent with Mackenzie by her side yesterday has done some good. Of course, she's got a slightly queasy feeling in her stomach from all the ice-cream, chocolate and pizza they'd eaten last night, but she's also never enjoyed watching movies more. "Thanks."

"No problem." Mackenzie grins. Kate wonders if Mackenzie will ever know how much she has helped Kate. Simply being by her side, of having someone who wasn't spending their time trying to tell her how wrong she is... it meant everything to her. "Wanna help?" Mackenzie grins, gesturing to a second cloth in the bucket.

"Sure." Kate smiles, catching sight of the shirt Mackenzie is wearing once more. "You know that was mine, right? I thought Mum must have chucked it."

"Was it?" Mackenzie plucks the material in interest. "I just used to wear it as a pyjama top."

"Sacrilege!" Kate laughs, in spite of herself. "Cost me $40!"

"I'll change. Although... it may have already gotten a hole in it." She bites her lip, glancing up at Kate.

"It's okay." She smiles. "Don't worry about it.  _Garbage_ is meant to be worn." Kate catches sight of three canvases drying in the corner and, in spite of herself, she finds herself moving over to them. "Whoa!" The first square is like an orb, shades of green and brown all flecked together and swirling in such a fluid manner Kate could almost believe it was moving. The second is browns and reds, and the third is the colours of the ocean on a sunny day. "They're beautiful Mackenzie." The more Kate looks, the more depth and colour she can see, and as she peers at the second, she sees sun-baked dirt and the smell of dust. "It's Coober, isn't it?" Kate asks, pointing to the canvas in question. "And this..." She fingers the green. "It's Mum. Her eyes."

"And yours. And mine." Mackenzie agrees, and for a moment, Kate finds herself peering at the teenager to discover that she is right. "Where I've come from..." Mackenzie gestures to the Coober picture. "My family..." She points to the green. "And the home I have now..." She points to the turquoise.

"Mackenzie, they're... beautiful. I..." She catches sight of the book next to it. "Is this your sketchbook?"

Mackenzie nods. "You can look if you want. It's just... random sketches."

Kate takes the book, and for a moment it's almost as though she's looking at photographs, the sketches are so detailed. Every pencil line adds more depth, until Kate finds herself lost in the images. Debbie, dancing around the lounge room. A car, crumpled. A hospital bed. Kate, from afar. Kate, standing in Mackenzie's bedroom back at Coober. Kate and Dutchy, smiling at each other.

"These..." Kate brushes a finger against Dutchy's cheek. "These are amazing."

* * *

"Gracie!" Dutchy flings his arms around his sister, surprise and excitement all over his face. "What are you doing here?"

She drops her spare key and bag on the lounge and grins. "Heard you were in port. Do I need an excuse to visit my big brother?" Gracie quips. "Plus, I missed you." Her good-natured smile fades slightly as she peers appraisingly up at him. "Something's wrong." She observes.

"I'm fine." Dutchy says, without much conviction. Gracie raises an eyebrow. "Really!" He emphasises.

"It's that girl, isn't it?" Gracie presses.

Dutchy rises and moves towards the kitchen. "Want a drink? I expect you're busy-"

"No, I'm good. What's going on? It's her isn't it? That girl? What's her name? Kate? So what happened?"

Dutchy catches sight of his sister's determined gaze and rolls her eyes, knowing she's not going to be distracted. "I... I made a bad decision." He says eventually. Gracie looks as though she's expecting more, but he says no more on the subject, and after a moment Gracie waves her hand in frustration. "And?"

"And what?"

"Well, I need a bit more than that. Need to know if I'm yelling at her or you." His face falls and so does Gracie's. "Oh shit." She murmurs. "You're in love with her, aren't you?"

He says nothing, and she seems to take his silence for affirmation. "Right." She says, her tone suddenly business-like. "I guess this conversation needs beer, huh?"

"I'm out." Dutchy mumbles, dragging a hand over his face.

Gracie picks up her keys and grins. "What are sisters for, hey?"

* * *

"It's looking... wow, bright." Kate grins, reloading her paint roller. "It looks good though. Autumny." Kate observes, peering around the room. The bright orange seemed to almost shimmer in the sunlight, and even though it will need another few coats yet, the white offsets it nicely.

"I'm thinking I might buy some autumn leaves vines and hang them around too. And maybe some fairy lights. If..." Mackenzie flushes suddenly. "I mean, if that's not too much." She looks as though she's expecting Kate to tell her that it  _is_ too much, but Kate smiles softly.

"It sounds perfect." Kate murmurs. "You've got such an eye for colour, Zee." She can't resist teasing as she adds. "Mind you, I can't believe your favourite colour is orange."

Mackenzie lets out a bark of laughter. "Hey, orange is the colour of... happiness-"

"I thought that was yellow."

"Sunshine-"

"Again, yellow?"

"Shhh!" Mackenzie moans. "And what's yours then?" She narrows her eyes. "Let me guess? Blue?"

"Ha... no. Red." Kate says after a moment.

"Red?" Mackenzie peers at Kate, shaking her head. "No, it's not. It's totally blue. Like, turquoise!"

"Now you're doubting my own favourite colour?" Kate challenges.

"Your room is blue!"

"Because red's supposed to induce anger and I work with guns." Kate points out. "I like red. It's the colour of... power... and... fruit and..."

"Love?" Finishes Mackenzie, and Kate's gaze ducks down. "Kate, do you love Dutchy?"

Kate's smile fades slightly as she reloads her roller once more, taking out her aggression on the wall. "It's not that simple." She settles on eventually.

"Humour me." Mackenzie presses. "Answer the question."

"Yes." The answer comes out before she's fully wrapped her brain around it, but as she says it, she realises that it was never really a question to begin with. Mackenzie already knew, after all, judging by the unsurprised look on her sister's face. But Kate... "Yes, I do love him."

"And do you honestly think he'd intentionally hurt me?"

"No." Again, the answer is simple. But the solution isn't. "I just couldn't... I need..."

"I know you want to protect me. But... not at the expense of you having a life. Dutchy... I made him send me down. If the shoe was on the other foot, he wouldn't have been able to talk you out of going down there too. And I'm not sorry I did. If I hadn't, those boys would have died. And if a few scratches on my face is the price I have to pay for that, then I'm okay." She takes a step closer. "You don't have to wrap me in cotton wool, Kate. Go to his house, now."

"But I can't just-"

"Come on! You can! Go!"

* * *

"Kate?" Dutchy looks at her, blinking up as though not quite sure whether she's really there or not. He'd thought it would be Gracie coming back from the store, or one of the  _Hammersley_ crew. Not her. "I..."

"I was wrong." Kate whispers, without preamble. "I'm sorry. I know you wouldn't hurt her and... and I love you too." The confession is so simple, so analytical and yet so purely Kate, that he can't help but laugh.

"I thought I'd lost you." He admits. "I thought I'd screwed it up."

"You're not going to lose me." Kate promises. "You've got me."

Dutchy is still smiling as she moves forward and kisses him. There's no gentleness this time, to hesitation or reservation. Now, it's pure heat and passion, and they very nearly overbalance, Kate crashing heavily into the wall behind, knocking the breath from her. "Shit." Dutchy whispers. "I..."

"Fine." Kate affirms, pressing her lips to his once more. Dutchy just has the presence of mind to make sure the door is shut before they stagger into the lounge room, still seemingly glued together. "Missed you." She murmurs, as his mouth leaves hers to trail hot and wet down her neck.

"Missed... you." Her fingernails rake down his neck, trailing over his back. "Missed... everything.  _Everything._ "

Kate toes out of her shoes, and as they crash through his lounge room, her shirt soon follows the same way. And in between each kiss he plants on her body, he mutters a string of disjointed words. "Beautiful. Stubborn. Love.  _Kate._ "

And she finds her foggy brain doing the same, as, with a light push, he lands on his lounge, just managing to wrap his hands around her hips and stop her crashing to the floor. "Stupid. Chauvinistic. Handsome. Love you."

They lose themselves in each other, as light as air, dancing and spinning until-

"Dylan, I- Shit." They both crash apart, Kate ducking down slightly. From over Dutchy's bare shoulder she can see the black fingernails covering the woman's eyes, a case of beer in the other.

"Gracie! What the hell!" Dutchy cries, as Kate tries to hide her underwear-clad body behind Dutchy. "What are you doing here?"

Gracie lets out a raucous laugh, takes a blind step back and crashes into a wall. "Shit." She mutters again. "Well, you sent me out for beer to drown your sorrows, remember? But doesn't look like you need that now. Kate, it was very nice to meet you. I'll shake your hand later. And Dyl... I'm glad you got it all sorted out. Be back in a few hours!"

They both wait for the closing of the door before they both burst out laughing. Kate lets out a sound between a groan and a snicker. "Well," Dutchy begins, pressing a kiss to her again. "It could have been worse." He observes, bending down to whisper in her ear. "She could have gotten here five minutes later, and found us like this." And he kisses her once more.


	19. Chapter 19

Mackenzie's legs stick to the vinyl of the lounge as she tries desperately to tug her shorts further down her legs, before turning hopefully back to the fan swinging backwards and forwards. Beside her, Kate looks just as anxious, her fingernails chewed down to the cuticles, but she flashes a reassuring smile, and Mackenzie's resolve strengthens.

"I thought buildings were supposed to have aircon in Cairns? Especially in November?" Mackenzie is hard-pressed to keep the whine from her voice. "Maybe we don't need to do this-"

"Yes, we do." Kate's voice is not unkind, but there's a hardness all the same. Even so, Kate looks as though she'd rather be anywhere but here. She'd changed out of her uniform before leaving work, but she's fanning herself with a  _Woman's Weekly_ magazine, her hair flying all over her pink cheeks. "We got here a little early. Appointment's not 'til four."

"So I could have gone home and changed." Mackenzie grumbles, plucking irritably at the polo shirt that is stuck to her back with sweat.

Kate exhales deeply, rubbing her hand over her temple. "You know, how is it that you're giving me great speeches of love and sounding oh-so-wise one moment, and then the next you're whinging like you're eight?" The bite to Kate's tone sends her fiddling with the zipper of her bag. Kate had insisted on shopping for a new one. The bright orange clashes horribly with the uniform. Kate winces.

"Sorry. Headache. Was kind of bitchy." Kate sits up a little straighter. "Do you want me to help you with homework while we wait? History?"

"Finished the history homework today. I'm stuck on maths. Do you understand monomials and exponents?" She challenges, flashing her maths book. Kate brings the book closer, trying to find a way to decipher all the random letters and numbers.

A moment later she barely conceals a wince, handing the book back to Mackenzie. "I can track down a man that's been overboard drifting in the ocean for eight hours?" Kate suggests, as though needing Mackenzie to know she's not completely clueless.

Mackenzie drops the book back into her bag in defeat. "Unfortunately not covered in Year 8 Mathematics."

"Mackenzie and Kate?" A voice calls out, and Zee tears her gaze away from her sister to look at the speaker. She'd imagined a woman, young and pretty, but upon glancing at the name badge on his shirt, she sees that Ashley is a man about Kate's age. "Hi." He approaches, taking Kate's hand in a brisk shake. Mackenzie rises quickly to her feet, feeling as though half her skin is still sticking to the seat. "I'm Ash. It's so great to meet you. Now, what I'm thinking I'd like to do is see you both separately, where you both have the chance to have your say independently, and then I'd like to see you both together. I know it's a little daunting, but I want to stress that everything said is confidential, although I am a mandatory reporter when there's a risk of harm." Mackenzie blinks, slightly overwhelmed at the overload of information. Ashley gives a reassuring smile. "So who'd like to go first?"

* * *

"So why don't you tell me what's been going on, Mackenzie?" His tone is warm, and yet Mackenzie isn't completely ready to spill her life story to another stranger. She looks up from her appraisal of his office, trying to detect parts of his life. Abstract artwork, picture of him, a wife, two kids. A toddler in a macaroni picture frame. The same type of kindergarten art Debbie had put all over the fridge, those small scribblings that her Mum had cooed over like masterpieces. "You don't already know everything?" Mackenzie challenges, turning her attention to him. He looks like he should be a high school history teacher, dressing up in viking helmets and captaining the chess team.

"All I know is that you've had a few changes in your life over the last few months." He says. It's a diplomatic answer, and Mackenzie finds she doesn't quite like his evasiveness. "I take it therapy sessions weren't your idea?" He presses.

"I'm not crazy." Mackenzie counters. She'd brought her bag in with her, not for any need, but just to have something of hers nearby.

"I didn't think you were." Ashley answers. "I'm not here to diagnose you with anything, or dig up painful memories. I'm here to... be an outlet, I guess. If you want to spend the next half-an-hour talking about... I don't know, lasagne, then that's fine."

"Lasagne?" Mackenzie presses.

"Hey, you'd be surprised." He shrugs. "It's easier for some people to talk about lasagne at first. Or your artwork? You're a painter?"

"Kate told you?"

"No. You've got paint under your fingernails." He nods towards her hands. Mackenzie curls her fingers into fists.

"My mum died." Mackenzie explains, and when she catches his curious gaze, she shrugs lightly. "Hey, no point chatting about lasagne. Not when Kate's done so much already..." She gestures towards the door where Kate is undoubtedly fanning herself again. "I didn't even know I had a sister until... it was a deathbed confession, I guess."

"And so you got moved here?" Ashley asks.

"Yeah, I guess..." Mackenzie shrugs. "Kate... she's got her job here and... it's too hard in Coober."

"So, new school, new friends? How's that working out?" She'd expected him to be taking notes, scribbling things down that Mackenzie will never read. But his full attention seems to be fixed on her.

"School... school is hard. It's harder than before. I mean, I'm good at some things but... I don't get maths."

"Neither do I." He grins. "Have you made any friends?"

"My best friend, Mikaylah, she's still... Kate bought me a phone so I could talk to her whenever I feel like it. But it's different, being so far away. And everyone here... it's hard. It's nearly the end of the year and everyone has already known their friends for two years. I... they're all in their little groups." Mackenzie scratches at her chin. "Kate worries about that. I think she's half a week away from joining the P&C and forcing playdates on me."

"And what's it like with Kate?"

"She's cool. She's... she's back at work now. So most days I end up back at NAVCOM in her office and do my homework while she works. But that's okay. And most weekends it's just her and me hanging out. She... she wants me to feel at home." Mackenzie trails off on the last sentence.

"And do you?" Ashley presses.

"I... it's like it's  _her_ house and I'm just some visitor who she got stuck with." Something inside Mackenzie forces her to keep talking, words tumbling out like lava. "I mean, she's nice but... but some times I think, I... I'd give up knowing her to have Mum back. And then I'm angry at Mum because it didn't have to be this way! Kate didn't have to be a stranger most of my life! I could have asked her all this!" She looks up at Ash, but he just nods, and Mackenzie lunges on. "She's in love, you know that? Kate? I mean, they're perfect for each other, and he's amazing. I mean, he's out on patrol at the moment, but he basically lives with us on shore leave. And neither of them make me feel like I'm excluded but... but they're just at the start of their lives together and I'm there like a roadblock. Kate gave up a patrol boat for me! She almost... she almost ended things with Dutchy because of me and... and I'm just this stupid country hick who's been at school for two weeks and still spends her lunch times in the library and can't do her homework without help." Mackenzie finishes her rant, blinking tears out of her eyes. Unconsciously, she tugs at the ring on her pinkie finger. Her mother's ring. It twists around and around.

"Alright, so do you feel as though these are things that are affecting you?" Ashley challenges.

"I don't know!" Mackenzie can't hide her irritation. "I can... I can cope. I just..."

"Well, why don't we try and think of some goals. By Christmas you want to..." He trails off, leaving the sentence dangling. "It's not something you need to tell me. But it's something for you to think about and try to decide whether you can achieve them yourself or if you need help. Because you deserve more than to just cope, Mackenzie."

* * *

Kate rubs her temple and forces a smile at Ash. "She watched her mother die. Once in that car, and then in that hospital too. I... I'm worried about the effect that could have on her. She seems... so fixed on the past. And being here..." Kate digs in her bag, scattering the detritus of her life on land. Her bags had gotten significantly messier since she'd taken a shore posting. Digging right to the depths, she manages to extract the small bottle of panadol pills. "Excuse me. Just a headache."

"Do you need some water?" Ashley asks, taking a step closer.

"Yes please. Sorry. It's the damn heat. Had a headache for the last few days. Can't seem to shake it." Ashley heads over to the water tower and fills a plastic cup for her. Kate takes the cup of water and downs two tablets. "Sorry. I... I'm not sure how to do this whole parenting thing. I... I mean, do I get her a tutor? Do I see the school? And... I..." Kate jabs a finger at the door. "She has nightmares. She calls out for her Mum. And when she wakes up and sees me there's a moment where... I can tell she thought it was her mother, and it was all some terrible dream. But she wakes up and it's real and I don't know how to..." Kate's knuckles whiten on the edge of the lounge. "I... oh..."

"Kate, are you okay?"

"Dizzy." Kate mumbles.

"You're going to faint?"

"I don't know. I..." Kate feels the world tip over and in an instant, Ashley grabs her, helping her to lean against the wall.

"Easy, easy! I'm going to call an ambulance. I'm just going to put your feet up on the arm of the chair. It'll help increase the blood flow to the brain."

"No!" Kate cries. "No ambulance. Can't... scare... Zee..."

"Listen, Kate. It's going to be okay, but I need to call an ambulance."

"No ambulance!" Kate repeats. "I... I'm feeling better." She manages to sit up, although her head is still sore. For a moment the room spins, but after a few seconds she seems to recover. "Please don't call an ambulance." More for something to do rather than any particular thirst, Kate downs the rest of the water.

"Fine." Ashley repeats. "But at least let me take you downstairs to the medical centre so we can take your blood pressure."

Kate hesitates for a moment. "Fine." She says. "But... let me tell Mackenzie, okay?"

* * *

Mackenzie was pacing so much Kate pulled her into the chair next to her, one arm clamped tight around Mackenzie's waist. "You don't need to stay. I think our appointment is well and truly over." Kate forces a smile in Ashley's direction.

"Lucky I've got a break." He quips back. "And that we're under a medical centre."

"Any idea what could be causing this?" Doctor Rotchford peers at Kate through a mop of messy curls, and despite the kindness of his and Ashley's smiles, Kate feels like screaming. Already she'd been poked, prodded, had her blood pressure checked twice and had blood taken from her. Kate shakes her head, and the doctor pulls a thermometer from his desk, pressing it to her forehead. "Any chance you could be pregnant?"

"Not pregnant." Kate cuts off Mackenzie's squeak, resisting the urge to pull the blood pressure cuff from her arm and walk out. "I've been feeling like this every morning. But I'm fine after I've been at work a few hours. Today, I left work early to get Mackenzie from school and we drove here."

"Are you working with any toxins in your home?" The doctor presses, shining a torch in her eyes.

"No. I mean, we painted. But Zee's not sick. And it's only been really bad the last week or so. More so on the weekends." She pulls away, blinking furiously as the torchlight burns on her retinas.

"And you're definitely not pregnant? No medication? Recreational drugs?"

"No!"

"Do you consume much caffeine?"

"I'm Navy." Kate answers, earning a chuckle from Ashley. "Look, I feel okay. It's just a headache and-"

"Have you cut down on your coffee?" The doctor interrupts.

"No." Kate shakes her head. "I mean, I drink a lot, sure, but it's the same amount I've been drinking for years?" She neglects to mention just how many scoops of coffee that is a day. The last doctor she'd told had very nearly pumped her stomach then and there.

"Do you think it's her coffee?" Mackenzie interrupts, standing again. She's quite pale, looking ridiculously young in her school uniform. Kate reaches out to grab her but is impeded by her blood pressure cuff.

"It could be a serious factor. She's showing signs of caffeine withdrawal. Have you recently changed the type of coffee you drink at home as opposed to at work? It could explain why you're so low in the mornings and weekends but pick up after a few hours - presumably after a coffee at work?"

"But I haven't changed my coffee-"

"It was me." Mackenzie murmurs, turning to Kate. She looks aghast, even paler than before, and Kate worries that Mackenzie is about to faint this time. "I... the last week or so when I'd make you coffee I switched it to decaf! I didn't think it would hurt you!" Mackenzie claps a hand over her mouth. "I didn't mean it! I just wanted to try and help you cut down and I thought... if you didn't know..."

Kate exhales deeply. "So all those times you made me coffee?"

"Decaf. Mostly. You never could tell the difference anyway."

"Mackenzie!" Kate lets her head flop back on the pillows, realising a moment too late that the movement doesn't help her sore head.

"I'm sorry!" Mackenzie looks near tears again, and Kate's irritation softens.

Kate shakes her head. "It's okay." She reaches out and, this time, manages to squeeze Mackenzie's hand. "But I want my coffee back."

* * *

"I'm sorry about the appointment today." Mackenzie mumbles as she helps Kate move from the passenger seat of the taxi towards the front door. They'd agreed that driving was not the best idea, and Ashley had insisted on calling them a taxi. What with the pounding in her head still present (although fading slightly as they detoured through McDonalds for the worst coffee of Kate's life) and the constant apologies from Mackenzie, Kate was longing to put her head down.

"Well, poisoning me is an interesting way to get out of therapy." Kate agrees, bumping lightly against Mackenzie. But she smiles to make sure Zee knows she's joking... mostly. "I know you didn't mean it."

They stagger through the front door like contestants in a three-legged race, and Mackenzie helps to lower her to the lounge. "I could have really hurt you."

"Zee, I had a headache and got a bit dizzy. I'm fine. Although I wouldn't say no to a  _caffienated_ coffee. I don't even care if the water's hot. Just coffee and water."

"You must want me gone now." Mackenzie mumbles, filling up the jug and going through the motions of digging right to the back of the cupboard to retrieve a nondescript tin. She pours the usual four scoops of coffee into the cup, adding tap water and grimacing.

"Never." Kate shakes her head.

Mackenzie rolls her eyes but obliges, bringing Kate a deliciously dark coffee. "No decaf." Mackenzie promises. Kate takes a cautious sniff and then downs the mug in five gulps, earning an incredulous glare from Mackenzie. When Kate meets her gaze however, tears start to swim in the teenager's eyes, and Kate puts down the empty mug.

"Mackenzie, I... I love you so much. And I'm glad you're here. It wasn't the way I'd have wanted us to meet. But I'm so glad I got to meet you. I... I love having you here. And I want you to stay." She whispers. There's a moment of tense silence, and then Mackenzie folds in on herself. Yet she stands back, just out of reach, sobbing. For a moment, Kate stares. Then she takes a shaky step, pulling Zee to the lounge with her and wrapping the teenager in a hug. "You've been so brave, honey." Kate whispers, her hand rubbing circles on Mackenzie's back. "Did it help, talking to someone else?"

"Yeah." Mackenzie nods, her voice thick with sobs. "I... I think it's good." They break apart and Kate feels the need to say all those things that have her up at night.

"I don't know what I can do to... to help you feel more at home. That's why I wanted to see Ashley. I thought if he can help. And I'm struggling. It's hard seeing you and not being able to help. But if Cairns is too much, we can go somewhere else. Max hasn't sold the house yet, so if you want to move back, I'll be with you. England or... or Tasmania or Perth or New Zealand... I don't care. I just... you are my number one priority."

"Dutchy-"

Kate gives a shrug. "Sisters before misters?" For a moment, she considers Dutchy in Suburbia, or working on a farm. Somehow, the images don't gel in her mind.

Mackenzie gives a choked laugh, shaking her head. "I like him. He's good for you. And... for us."

Kate squeezes Zee's hand again. "You're not interrupting my life, Zee. You're part of it. And if you need me to say it every day of the rest of my life, I will. I know I'm not... I'm not Debbie. And I can't replace her. And I can't bring her back. But I'm going to be here for you. And I might suck at it some of the time, and I'll probably be really suspicious of my coffee for the next few weeks, and I sing in the shower and my hair clogs up the vacuum cleaner and I'm a workaholic. But I'm going to do my best. You make me want to do better. You and me, we're family, and I love you."

For a moment, Mackenzie looks as though Kate has grown another head. Then she falls into Kate's arms again. "I love you too."


	20. Chapter 20

The week drags on for Kate, whose brain is still adjusting to the changes in her caffeine intake. For the most part, the headaches are gone, but she still finds her eyes slipping well before 2100, and Mackenzie has had to start the same  _Charmed_ episode three times over before Kate finally manages to make it through to the end.

The imminent arrival of Dutchy and the rest of the  _Hammersley_ crew energise her a little, but by the time Friday night rolls around and the excitement wears off, Kate finds herself lulled into a soft doze on the lounge, her head resting in Dutchy's lap as he brushes his fingers lightly through her hair. Even the explosions (and there's a lot of them) of the movie they're currently watching do nothing to keep her from sinking into oblivion, and Kate surrenders to it, relishing in the feel of him, of Dutchy being back for a whole blissful 48 hours.

A shrill beeping bursts through her consciousness like nothing else had, and Kate groans audibly, mumbling in her irritation. "No." Her voice is barely audible through the thick fog of sleep and the hand she throws up to cover her face. "You just got back. If they're calling you out again I vote we both go AWOL."

"That's not exactly the Kate McGregor I remember. You ill?" He presses a hand to her forehead in mock concern. Kate peers through one bleary eye, attempting a glare she knows does nothing to scare anyone.

"Ha-ha." Kate mumbles drily. "I've been tired ever since Mackenzie messed with my coffee. Wassa time?"

"1932 hours." Dutchy smirks. "You really are tired."

"Well, it's been a long week." Kate protests, pulling herself into a sitting position and brushing her hair from her face. "Sorry. You're only here for two days and I fall asleep on you."

"Eh. Truth be told I might have closed my eyes a little too." Dutchy concedes, flashing a mischievous smile. "For... like... two minutes."

"Two minutes, hey?" Kate challenges.

"You were both sound asleep for like a good forty minutes at least! I have photos to prove it and I'm halfway through a sketch of it!" Mackenzie calls back from the top of the stairs. A moment later her head appears, hair out and wavy from an afternoon swim at the lagoon. Kate barely suppresses an eye roll as she sees Mackenzie has once again helped herself to Kate's wardrobe, this time a long flowing skirt. "And Kate, your phone's beeping too. You need it?"

"It's all good." Dutchy calls back. "Group text. Same as mine. Looks like the old  _Hammersley_ group chat has been revived."

He twists his phone around, and Kate lets out a snicker of laughter at the group chat 2Dads had initiated mostly to organise the escape room they'd done as a 'crew bonding' task three months previous.  **Ham- _murder-_ sley. **"Who from?" Kate frowns, even though she has a strong suspicion.

"Who else?" Dutchy smirks and reads aloud. " _To commemorate our dear old Boss and her centuries on Hammersley, and to celebrate the arrival of our dear teenage mini-McGregor-Mackenzie, and also a certain someone's birthday-_ "

"How the hell did they find out my birthday?!" Kate interrupts. "Bloody 2Dads." Dutchy smirks but reads on.

" _Please show up tomorrow at 7 for a fancy dress party. Costumes mandatory. Late notice but hey that's the Navy for you_."

"We are not going." Kate protests, as even as she watches Dutchy's phone screen, Charge and Bird both send thumbs up, and RO sends a message assuring them all he will not be dressing up but wanting to confirm the address.

"It's a party for you." Dutchy reasons. "And he's had it planned for weeks. Everyone's already got their costumes and I've got something for you too. It's only 'late notice' cos we knew you'd back out."

Kate wonders privately when they all got to know her so well. "And Mackenzie-"

Dutchy leans closer, a truly evil smirk on his face. "She says she's doing your make up."

* * *

As Kate lets out a groan, she sees that 2Dads has changed the group chat name once more.  ** _Hammer(ed and)sley(ing)._**

"Okay, to start with, it's slaying with an 'A'." Kate protests, twisting around to face Dutchy. "And second of all, you also failed to mention this is at the pub. Where there will be  _other people_ to see me dressed... like  _this._ " Kate plucks the mesh tulle skirt with disinterest for a moment, before glaring at the matching glittering green fairy wings.

"Hey, you're small, and blonde and cute. Hence, Tinkerbell." Dutchy waves a hand over her appearance with a cheeky look that tells her oh-so-easily that Dutchy is enjoying the argument far too much. "Unless you'd rather don your cossie and go as a surfer."

Kate rolls her eyes, ignoring Dutchy's comment and instead waving a hand towards his black cape and the thin trickle of fake blood from his mouth. "And you get to be a vampire! That's at least cool!"

"Fairies are cool." Dutchy mumbles, running a hand through his slicked-back hair before holding them up in surrender. "Look, I thought it would look nice, okay? You've got a fairy statue in your garden! Or you could be a mermaid instead and swap with Zee?"

Kate rolls her eyes once more, and Dutchy wonders vaguely if it's possible to gain a serious injury simply from rolling your eyes too much. "You know how uncoordinated I am on two feet, let alone a tail." She quips, and Dutchy makes a noise somewhere between a chuckle and a sigh.

"Alright, I'm gonna go help set up. See you there?"

Kate nods, moving in closer and pecking him on the cheek, speaking with such a sickly sweet voice that it even takes herself aback. "If you leave me at this thing alone, I will never speak to you again. Mmmkay?"

Dutchy grins, and presses a kiss to her neck. "As if I could live without your sweet sweet blood." He smirks, before sweeping his cape dramatically. "See you there, my dear Mortal!"

* * *

"Okay, so it turns out I don't really know how to do makeup." Mackenzie winces, as she starts to wipe Kate's cheek with a wet flannel. Kate makes to turn to look in the mirror but Mackenzie stops her. "Don't. It looks awful."

"Okay." Kate shakes her head. "There's a box in my wardrobe marked  _Nikki's Crap_. Grab that and I'll go wash my face."

" _Nikki's Crap_?" Mackenzie repeats, looking bewildered.

"Yep." Kate sighs, sweeping her hair over her shoulder and pulling a face as it catches on her wings. "I'm going to share with you one of my most obscure and useless talents."

* * *

Fifteen minutes later and Mackenzie is in awe. "How did you learn to do this?" She gasps, twisting her head this way and that to admire the pale blue sheen to her skin, and the scales Kate had expertly carved into Mackenzie's cheek. "I look like a real mermaid!" She catches Kate's eye and rolls her own. "Okay, before you say anything, I know mermaids aren't real. But this is  _awesome_!"

"A girl I used to work with found we had too much time on our hands one shore leave and spent too much time on YouTube exploring." Kate explains, her lips twitching at the memory of the shore leave she and Nikki had spent with too much wine and hours of online tutorials. "She was trying to teach me to how to do eyeliner and it just sort of snowballed from there."

Mackenzie tips her head again, lightly fingering the shell necklace hanging around her neck. "Maybe... you could teach me sometime?" She suggests tentatively.

"Yeah." Kate agrees, as she peers into the mirror and begins on her own makeup. "That sounds good."

* * *

The pub is nearly unrecognisable, full of all sorts of characters and creatures.  _Alice_ and the  _Mad Hatter_ are seated next to Charge, who has donned a pirate get-up. Bird is dressed as a witch, her black hat already taken from her head to sit loose on the table beside her. Bomber is there too, and Maxine and RO, although the latter two seemed to have decided against wearing costumes. Everywhere Kate turns, she sees masks and capes and glitter, and throughout the whole pub, she can detect the chemical smell of hairspray.

"Boss! Or... oh..." 2Dads' voice is slightly muffled from... wherever his face is in amongst the inflatable t-rex costume he's encased in. "What do we even call you now?" He doesn't wait for an answer. "You look awesome... from what I can see. And Mackenzie too!"

Kate can't help but smile, even in her determinedly critical phase, however she can't resist leaning closer to him. "If  _anyone_ sings  _Happy Birthday_ to me, I'm popping your costume." The t-rex's head wobbles ever so slightly. "But thanks... for organising this."

In response, 2Dads lets out a loud roar that could  _just_ pass as a dinosaur noise, and moves back into the crowd. Bird comes forward and within seconds Mackenzie is off jabbering away with her, leaving Kate feeling slightly self-conscious. Twisting around for someone that wasn't already chatting, she spots RO sitting alone at the bar, and slides in beside him as fluidly as her wings will allow.

"House Shiraz please." Kate orders when the bartender arrives to immediately take her order. As she pulls out her wallet, he shakes his head.

"I'm under strict instructions that you don't pay for drinks tonight." He tells her, sliding the drink across. "You're covered tonight."

Kate turns in bewilderment to RO, who shrugs. "You've got a tab. Although I would advise, Ma'am, that you don't mix your drinks."

"Thanks..." Kate smiles at him. RO too is not wearing a costume, aside from the piece of masking tape stuck to the back of his shirt in Charge's untidy scribble that reads  ** _Grouchy Muggle._** Kate barely manages to choke back her laugh at the label she's sure RO knows nothing about. "How's things on  _Hammersley_?"

"Oh, you know. Jacobi bores us all senseless, but the new CO is adequate enough I suppose. Although he's very insistent on  _Team Bonding._ " RO says the phrase like it's something akin to drunken orgies, and rolls his eyes. "I miss  _logical_ discussion."

"Hey RO?" Kate asks, struck by a sudden inspiration.

"Yes, Ma'am?"

"Can you explain minomials to me?"

* * *

By midnight, Kate has accepted three of whatever (apparently more potent than she'd realised) drinks 2Dads had been bringing her, and her head is appropriately giddy. Seeking out the cool sea breeze, Kate ducks outside, relishing in the refreshing air.

"Too much for you?" Mackenzie asks, following behind Kate. She'd spent most of the night chatting with more ease than anything Kate had ever managed in her entire life.

"Just seeking some air." Kate replies with a soft smile, adjusting the strap on her wings. "It is way past your bedtime, you know?"

"Anyone ever told you that you're bossy?" Mackenzie counters with a smirk and a pointed look.

"Whatever." Kate grins back. "It's genetic." Kate folds her arms and feels a crinkling in her bra. "Oh, but RO explained maths to me, so I have a cheat sheet and I think I can help!"

Mackenzie snorts. "You're such a nerd. You spent your birthday party learning how to do maths?"

"Hey, I mingled and danced!" She protests, slightly defensively.

"Did you meet the new Captain? Feeling a bit safer now, leaving?"

"Yeah. I've met him before - knew him more by face than name though. I've never worked with him, but his credentials are good enough, and personally he seems like he's a pretty decent guy so I'm..." Mackenzie makes a  _wind it up_ sort of look, and Kate rolls her eyes. "Okay, fine. I trust him to look after Dutchy and the rest of them. Is  _that_ what you wanted to hear?" Mackenzie lets out a snort of laughter.

" _Kate!"_ The voice takes her surprise. She wheels around, very nearly crashes over in the heels she's wearing and just manages to right herself. No. No, he can't be here. He was in Canberra. He was away from her and-

"Mike." The voice is little more than a whisper, but even in the half-light there's no mistaking his features. "Zee, go inside." Kate whispers, and she can't stop herself from looking around, praying that someone,  _anyone_ else is there to help. There's a sickly sweet smell in the air. He's blind drunk.

"You don't think she should stay?" Mike challenges. "It's a party, after all." And she realises that this isn't the Mike she fell in love with. It's the other one, the one who walked out.

"What she does is none of your concern." Kate spits out. "Mackenzie, go inside!" A shuffling tells her that Mackenzie has obeyed, and in the few seconds she takes to make sure Zee gets in safely, Mike has advanced another few steps.

"How could you not tell me, Kate? I have to see it by chance in a messenger feed?" He holds up his phone, and Kate just glimpses the name.  ** _Hammer(ed and)sley(ing)._**

"What?" She frowns, genuinely clueless as to why he's here, why he's so angry. For a moment she wonders if he's upset about not being invited, but surely that doesn't warrant a plane flight from Canberra.

"The kid." Mike presses. His arm reaches out, his fingers not exactly gripping her, but uncomfortable nonetheless. "How old is she? I saw a picture. She's... what... thirteen?" Realisation fills her like lead, and she takes a step back, physically recoiling.

"Mike, she's not yours!" Kate cuts across his ramblings.

"No? Because we were together fourteen years ago. So were you hooking up in bars even then?"

The words are like a slap in the face. "You're drunk and I want you to leave." Kate shakes her head. "You flew up from Canberra for  _this_? To accuse me of...  _no._ I'm done, Mike. Leave."

"How could you hide a child from me?"

"I'm telling you she's not-"

"But you've cheated on me before."

"You  _left me!_ " Kate feels her temper rise. "And I'm telling you, if you'd just  _bloody listen-"_

"So who was it, then, huh? Did you find someone else on the course as well-" They're both raising their voices, talking over each other until-

"Hey!" Dutchy's voice cut off the rest of Mike's words. "She asked you to leave. I think you should listen, mate."

"I'm not your mate!" Mike looks between Kate and Dutchy with disgust, not missing the calming hand Dutchy has placed on Kate's shoulder. "Didn't take you long to move in."

"Leave." Kate repeats, voice shaking.

"But we're catching up. We've got so much to talk about-"

"Boss..." It's another voice, calmer this time, and Kate looks up to see Charge standing there, the most serious pirate she's ever seen. "I'll drive you home."

"We're not done talking." Mike hisses.

"Yes, you are." 2Dads cuts in. He's abandoned his t-rex costume, instead standing in shorts and a T-shirt, arms folded and cutting an oddly intimidating figure. "At least when you're like this. But you should take Charge up on his offer."

Kate looks up, and it's to see them all standing around her; Charge, Dutchy, 2Dads, Bird, RO and Cook. Hell, even Jacobi and the New CO have their arms crossed, flanking her.

"Come on." Charge repeats. "No harm's been done, and I'm sober. I'll drive you home, before things get out of control."

Mike turns to Kate once more, and she forces herself to stare him out. She stands there, her legs like jelly as she forces herself to stand up, to stay strong. Just until he's gone. She expects him to fight, to protest. But a moment later he gives a harsh laugh and turns away, throwing off the arm Charge tries to place around his shoulder but following him none the less.

"You right?" It's Dutchy that breaks the silence that follows. Of course, they all knew; how could they not? It's not exactly slow news when the CO and XO of a boat move in together and...

And  _almost_ have a child.

"I swear, I didn't realise he was in the chat, Ma'am. I thought..." 2Dads hastens to add. "I'm sorry. I... I didn't think..." He gulps, looking torn between touching her or backing away. "Are you okay?"

"Mackenzie." Kate croaks, tongue darting out to moisten her lips.

"She's inside." Cook answers. "I'll... I'll go check on her." She starts to move towards the pub once more, and after a moment Bird follows.

"Come on, guys. Maybe we should..." She jabs a thumb in the direction of the pub too, and after a moment, the rest of the crew move to follow, save for Dutchy.

He waits until the rest of them are out of sight before turning to speak softly to her. "You alright?" He murmurs.

She turns to him, and feels some of her panic and uncertainty fade. "I will be." She settles on, as he envelopes her in his arms.

* * *

"Got him to his motel room." Charge jingles the keys in his hand as he pulls Kate aside at the front of the pub. They were all dispersing now, after a few more drinks and a conscious effort on everyone else's part to cheer Kate up. 2Dads had sung karaoke, they'd all danced with her, and RO had been voted  _best dressed_ and awarded with a plastic golden medal. Now, they were all out the front, organising the drunk into taxis and saying goodbyes. In one hand, Kate is holding a gift bag containing a $300 voucher for the local shopping centre, two bottles of her favourite wine, a pair of boots she'd casually been eyeing off with Bird - who'd apparently gone back to get them - and what was left of her cake in a tupperware container.

"Thanks." Kate murmurs to Charge, keeping her voice low as she sees Mackenzie deep in conversation with Dutchy close by. "How... I mean... was he okay?"

Charge seems to understand why she's asking, and nods tersely. "He'd... uh... sobered up a bit by the time we got there. I think... once I told him Mackenzie was your sister he realised he..." He trails off, and Kate wonders just how much Charge knows, or suspects, about why Mike was so upset. "He said to say sorry. Wanted to do it himself but I said... well, didn't think that was a very good idea."

Kate sighs inwardly in relief, glad she doesn't have to force herself to talk to him once more. "Thanks Charge. I... well, I think I owe you... like,  _a lot."_

Charge grins goofily at her. "Got pulled over for an RBT. I think they thought they had a shoo-in. Didn't believe me when I said I'd lost a bet and was deso." He waves a hand vaguely in the direction of his outfit. Kate snorts with laughter.

"Yeah, not many sober pirates out there. Especially not on a Saturday night." Kate grins. "Thanks for... you know."

"Eh, don't mention it." Charge waves away her thanks, and they fall into a comfortable silence for a few minutes, before Charge starts to speak again, his voice tentative. "So, you and Dutchy."

She's surprised she doesn't feel the shock or fear she'd expected she would if people would find out. "That obvious?" She asks.

"Well, he did storm in like a white night to protect you. Not that you needed it. Fiercest bloody fairy I've ever seen." Charge grins, bumps his shoulder into hers. "And he's got glitter all over his neck." He adds, with a booming laugh. "So, do I need to put the hard word on him? The whole  _you hurt her, you die_  thing?"

Kate's smile widens. "Nah, I think I'm good."

"Hmm... well, I reckon it's about time. You're good for each other." Charge gives a huge wink at her. "And after I turned you down I was worried you'd pine for me forever."

"Oh, bugger off!" Kate laughs. "We were having a nice moment."

"Yeah." Charge smiles. "And Kate, I'm glad you're happy."

* * *

Kate had been sure that by the time she'd gotten home, scrubbed all the glitter off her and fallen into bed, she'd pass straight out, but she finds her mind ticking over, replaying the events of the night. Of dancing, and the pinata shaped like a dolphin. Of the cake that Mackenzie had made and decorated - caramel, the best kind. Of kissing Dutchy at the end of the night and not caring who saw. Of RO drunkenly dancing the conga, and Dutchy groaning as  _Abba_ began to play. Of Mike.

"Do you want kids?" Kate's question comes out of nowhere, but she finds that she's rolling over anyway, seeking out his eyes in the half-light. "I just mean, that's something we haven't talked about. Kids. I mean, not properly."

Dutchy hesitates for a moment, as though mulling the question over. "Well, I... if we're honest, I... I'd love kids. But Zee is... she's enough. If it's her and you I'm... I'm happy. And if it's you and her and... and twenty kids, I'm happy."

Kate lets out a snort of laughter, before reality catches up. "I... I'm older though. After everything that happened last year... I mean, you know Mike and I lost a baby. I just... if it happens, it happens. I just need to make sure we're being realistic."

"But would you want to have kids?" Dutchy presses. He pulls her closer, so that her head rests on his bare chest, one of his hands holding her back while the other brushes her hair from her face.

Kate closes her eyes for a minute, and imagines a house full of giggling kids. "Yes." She says automatically. "Yes, I... I do."

"Well..." Dutchy lowers his voice. "You know, maybe we should... get a little practice in." His breath tickles her neck. "Practice makes perfect."

Kate's voice is little more than a whisper, and with her halo of hair illuminated by the moonlight, Dutchy doesn't think he's ever seen anything quite so beautiful. "I'm also on the pill." Kate whispers.

"Well..." Dutchy's hands seize her hips, so that she's straddling his naked torso. "Like I said, no reason we can't practice."


	21. Chapter 21

As Christmas approaches, Kate finds herself dreading the day itself. For one thing, it's the first year she's actually had presents to buy, save for the obligatory twenty-dollar Secret Santa gifts they used to do on  _Hammersley_. Even when she'd been with Mike, they hadn't done the present thing too well, filling in the absence of gifts with promises of future presents that never came. For another,  _Hammersley_  doesn't return until after midday on Christmas, so she and Mackenzie are meeting Dutchy at his parents for Christmas.

For now though, Kate tries to make the most of their time together, and this sees the three of them decorating the house one Sunday afternoon. "Okay!" Dutchy calls out, midway through untangling a string of Christmas lights. "I draw the line at  _ABBA_  Christmas albums. Seriously Kate. Where's the phone?"

"I hid it!" Mackenzie calls back cheerfully before Kate can protest. "So  _neither_ of you could change it!" Zee places the last piece of the Christmas tree into its allotted spot and clambers to her feet once more. "We need Christmas music! But hey, I'm being fair. Got  _Metallica_  doing  _Carol of the Bells_ and then  _Stevie Nicks_  singing  _Silent Night_ , so all bases covered. And then the greatest Christmas song is cued up after that."

Dutchy winces. "Which would be..."

Zee looks as though it's the most stupid question in the world. " _Santa, Wear Your Shorts_ by  _Hi-5._ Protest all you want..." Mackenzie holds up a finger to forestall any further protests. "But it's a banger."

"I never realised just how many people did a Christmas album." Dutchy muses, apparently it's easier to let it go than protest  _Hi-5_ 's involvement in the day. "See, back home, we just throw vinyl after vinyl on practically non-stop. Most Christmassy song we've got is a drunken Santa doll that sings  _Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer_. The battery has gone in it and I'm pretty sure he ended up in the pool one year so truth-be-told, he does sound pretty intoxicated." He turns to Kate. "Are you still okay about going to see them?"

"Yeah." Kate answers, not entirely truthfully. It was one thing to meet his parents for the first time, but something all-together to meet them without him  _and_ on Christmas. "But you'd better get there."

Dutchy wraps an arm around her waist, fingers trailing along her shoulder-blades. "Well, we should berth just after 1130 hours, so if I get straight there without too many problems at NAVCOM I should get there just on lunch time. What are you doing in the morning?"

"Eh. Just stay here, probably. Do all the last minute cooking stuff-" Dutchy makes a noise of disgust and moves so that Kate is standing at arms length. Kate rolls her eyes, holding both her hands up in surrender. " _Mackenzie_ is doing the cooking! Not me! Promise!"

"Good, because whatever thing you served me last night, I swear the animal had talons."

"Oh  _haha_!"

* * *

On the last night in port, Kate and Dutchy retire to bed with Christmas Carols still ringing in their ears and tinsel all over the house. "Hey, Kate?" Dutchy waves a hand in the direction of the ceiling fan which, as Kate squints towards it, yields a sprig of mistletoe tied there.

Kate smirks, straddling his lap in one easy movement. "So that's why it took you twenty minutes to go buy milk from the corner store?" She whispers, her face inches from his.

Dutchy's smile widens as he closes the distance between them. "Rules are rules." He plants a kiss on her, and she lets herself fall into it, although when he makes to deepen it, she pulls away, jabbing a finger up high.

"Hey, I'm going to have serious pash rash if that stays there."

"I'm going to be away until Christmas!" Dutchy leans closer, a wide smile on his face. "Don't tell me you've got some other guy lined up?"

"Oh, as if I could find anyone... as... annoying... as... you." She punctuates each word with a kiss, before rolling off him in one fluid motion. As Dutchy makes to turn out the bedside light, Kate seizes his arm.

"I wanted to talk to you, actually. Been a bit hard to find the time today."

"Uh-oh." Dutchy murmurs. One hand reaches up to scratch his stubble.

"What?" She frowns.

He shakes his head. "Well, it just seems that nothing good ever comes from that statement."

Kate pushes herself back up in bed, busying herself by digging around in her top drawer so that she doesn't have to look at him. "Well, maybe... this time it can? Or not. I don't know. I just wanted you here when I... when we..." Her hands close on the desired object in the drawer, but she keeps her gaze fixed down. "I think I could possibly be pregnant." Dutchy makes to move forwards, opening his mouth but Kate forestalls him with a hand. "It's just a feeling. I mean, I'm a little late, and I'm still having headaches and nausea and it might still be something else. And I don't know whether it would be good or bad but I wasn't sure and it occurred to me today-"

"I love you." Dutchy interrupts. "I love you no matter what. And I know you're kind of freaking so do you want to get a test now or-"

In reply, Kate removes the box out from the back of her drawer, holding it up to him. "I already bought one. I just... I wanted you here." She holds it close to her for a second. "I mean... if you want to-"

"Of course I do!" Dutchy pushes himself up on his pillows too. "Do... do you?"

Kate's words are warbled by a shaky breath. "Y... yeah." She agrees. She turns her gaze towards the en-suite, bringing the box with her. "Be back in a sec."

* * *

"Two minutes?" Dutchy questions. He's taken to sitting on the edge of the bed, crumpling the paper instructions into a tight ball in his fist while Kate paces up and down the room. The test itself is on the floor in between them, wrapped in a tissue so neither of them are tempted to peek.

"Two minutes." She affirms. She's jumpy as hell and feeling close to a panic attack when Dutchy calls out.

"Hey. Whatever the results... I'll be here."

"You can't promise that." Kate jabbers, her voice slightly faster than normal. "Hell, I've lost count of the times we've both almost been killed together, let alone apart. And you can't tell me  _Hammersley_  has suddenly turned into the world's dullest boat in my absence."

"Well, truth be told, there  _was_  a reduction in hostage situations. They did always seemed to pick you." Kate doesn't smile, and Dutchy stands up to wrap his arms around her. "If you want me to take a shore posting, just say the word. Hell, I'll become a ballet teacher or... or we could start a farm or... whatever. Kate, I don't care, as long as we're together."

It's his own calm that brings her from spinning off into orbit. His own coolness that makes her realise more than anything else could that he is genuinely excited, and after a moment she finds herself relaxing into his arms.

"I don't want you to leave the Navy. I don't know. I'm just panicking all the time now. I feel as though everything is coming to something bad and I can't figure out what is going to happen. At least on the boat I could control it but I just feel helpless and... I'm not used to feeling like this. That's partly why I thought..." She glances towards the test in the middle of the floor. "This whole thing... it's so sudden..."

He hums in affirmation, rubbing circles on her back. "Well, we were thinking about it anyway. I mean, you stopped the pill a while ago."

"I guess just neither of us thought it would be this soon." She pulls out of his grip to look at him. "Or maybe it's not. Maybe I'm just overreacting and-"

"You're not overreacting." He murmurs.

"Yes, I am! I'm rambling and panicky and-"

They both stop as a buzzing from the timer on Kate's phone rings out. Kate snatches it up and mutes it, not wanting to startle Mackenzie in the other room. "Two minutes." Dutchy murmurs again, before turning to Kate. "You ready?"

"Yes." Kate murmurs. "No. I don't..." She inhales sharply. "Yes." She says eventually. And as she moves to retrieve the test, peeling back the paper so Dutchy can see, she feels her heart skip a beat. For a full ten seconds they both stare, and then Kate turns to face Dutchy. "I'm pregnant." She murmurs.

"You're pregnant." He repeats softly, pressing a kiss to her head.

_Pregnant. Pregnant._ _Having a baby. Pregnant._

"Move in." The words tumble forward without proper thought, but she finds she's never been surer of anything. "You should move in... officially."

His eyes twinkle with excitement, like a kid under the Christmas tree.  _We are going to_ ** _have_** _a kid under a Christmas tree next year._

"You sure? With Zee..."

"Yes." Kate nods. "Yes, I... I was going to ask you at Christmas anyway but... you should move in. After Christmas, I... I want you here."

They both sink into the bed together, so closely wrapped in each other's arms that it feels they could comfortably fit two more people either side of them if they'd had the inclination. "I would love to move in with you." He smiles, trailing a hand through her hair. "Hey, the first person we need to tell is Zee, okay? We... we probably wouldn't even be together if it weren't for her."

"Yeah." Kate agrees, a lump in her throat. "Yeah."

Dutchy lets out a laugh. "I kind of just want to wake her up and tell her right now. Like, I feel I should be shouting from rooftops or... or...  _something_. Shit, we're having a  _baby,_ Kate! I can't... I'm so excited!" He presses a kiss to her forehead. "Can we tell Zee tomorrow before I leave?"

Kate can't think of anything she'd rather do. "Yes." She agrees.

* * *

The next morning, Dutchy winks at Kate as he sets a gift bag down in front Mackenzie. Zee looks up from her book, Malin curled up in her lap. "Morning!" Dutchy greets them both. "Now, Zee, I know we said that we'd do presents at mine but I... well, we wanted you to open something before I left." Mackenzie glances at the bag and turns to Kate, looking puzzled.

"What is it?" She frowns.

"Open it and you'll find out." Kate grins. Mackenzie digs in the bag and pulls out a coffee mug.

"Ah..." Mackenzie begins. "Is this a comment on the whole caffeine thing, because I still maintain that I have enough weirdness in me without coffee." It takes Mackenzie a moment to catch sight of the words across it.  _World's Best Auntie_. The scream that comes out of Mackenzie's mouth makes Kate and Dutchy jump. "Are you... you're pregnant?!" She turns to Kate, pushing her chair back so fast that Malin leaps, yowling, from Zee's lap. Zee wraps Kate in a hug, one hand touching her older sister's belly for a moment before turning to Dutchy and wrapping him in a hug too. "Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh! Congratulations! This is... congratulations!" Zee scoops up Malin and starts to dance with him around the kitchen. " _I'm going to be an auntie! I'm going to be an auntie!"_

"Look, it's still early days but we wanted you to be the first to know." Dutchy grins at her.

"Yeah." Kate nods. "Congrats. And thanks. Auntie Zee."

* * *

"You'll only be at Mum and Dad's alone for... an hour... two hours at most." Dutchy assures her. "Besides, Zee's on school holidays next week, so you'll have her. And you're almost on holiday at work too. Live it up! Enjoy the break, and I'll be at Mum's before the kids hit the pool. But there'll be heaps of people. You know Gracie."

"I know." Kate murmurs, closing her eyes momentarily as the soft ocean breeze blows her hair in front of her gaze. "But... it's your parents, and it's the first time I've met them, and... and the last time I saw your sister, you and I were kind of..."

"Half naked?" Dutchy supplies, and Kate barely suppresses a shudder at the memory. "Well, you did jump me there."

"Shhh! You know Navy gossip!" She trails off for a moment, saluting as 2Dads and Bird walk past, both of them making her feel any less weird about being on the docks in her civvies and hugging Dutchy. "You weren't complaining." She hisses the moment she's sure the younger sailors are out of earshot. Of course, she's sure by now they all know about their relationship, but it doesn't mean she wants to be the subject of any more gossip.  _Heaven help us when they find out I'm pregnant,_ she thinks drily, wondering how quickly it would take Charge and 2Dads to start taking bets on anything to do with the baby. "I'll be fine. We'll be fine. I just... I'll miss you."

"Miss you too." Dutchy nods, stopping just short of kissing her.

"Oh, bugger the gossip." Kate grins, closing the distance and kissing him, ignoring the catcalls and wolf-whistles of the rest of the Hammersley crew, who seem to find amusement in the spectacle. "Safe trip."

"See you Christmas Day." Dutchy grins.

* * *

"Ugh. Why isn't it going right?" Mackenzie wrinkles her nose, peering in disgust at the mottled lump of wax on her leg.

Kate peers at it critically, halting her own shading of the gory red chunk in her leg. "Not enough primer?" Kate suggests. "This wax can get really hard to manage sometimes." She lifts herself a little higher to get a better look. "The outside looks amazing though. Just have to keep practising. It took me months before I managed to do even that." Mackenzie nods sullenly. "Just start another one if you'd like." Kate suggests.

"At this rate I'll be covered in fake cuts. Better wash it off before school tomorrow or the principal might freak." Mackenzie hesitates for a moment, then shrugs, reaching forwards to grab the jar of wax.

"How is school going anyway?" Kate enquires, wiping her brush off onto a piece of paper towel and carefully selecting another shade. "Did you sit with anyone different?"

Mackenzie shrugs again. "I hung out with the same group today. Kind of all the outcasts but they're nice. And between all of them there's someone in all of my classes."

"Well, that's good isn't it?" Kate frowns. "Sorry, Zee. Just... I... I want you to be okay."

"I am." Mackenzie assures. "For the most part. But..." She trails off, smearing another clump of wax.

"But what?" Kate presses.

"Well... they made the same assumption that Mike guy did at your party, when they saw you pick me up. And... they all sort of think that you're my..." Mackenzie swallows awkwardly. "Well, it's been too much to try and... I mean, it's just weird, talking about Mum. I talk about her with you, and when I call Mikaylah. But this is... well, it's been like a different reality but now I've got to tell them all."

"You don't have to rush into anything you don't want to." Kate assures her.

"It's just a weird thing to have to say. And then things get awkward." Mackenzie shakes her head, rolling another clump of wax between her fingers. "Maybe next year when... I don't know." Mackenzie picks up the primer and starts to put some on her skin. "Hey, Kate... can I ask you something?" She waits until Kate nods before tentatively moving on. "That guy? Mike? He thought I was your... your daughter." Mackenzie stumbles over the last word, as though not quite able to wrap her tongue around it. And for a moment, Kate finds herself imagining, just for a moment, an alternate reality where Mackenzie was Mike and Kate's daughter. Would she still be with him? Or would she have done exactly as he'd accused her of? Shut him out and ran away for good?

But then she thinks of Dutchy and she finds she rathers this reality.

"When you mentioned..." Mackenzie continues. One hand moves to fiddle with her hair, a guilty expression on her face, before she seems to remember her hands are covered in wax and instead Mackenzie moves to dig it from under her fingernails. "Well, I might have accidentally snooped and maybe Dutchy caught me and told me the quick version of you and him so I didn't upset you. Mike was the guy from a year ago, wasn't he?"

Kate exhales deeply. "He's... we had a complicated history." She says eventually. "We were... together... about fourteen years ago. And it ended pretty suddenly." She wonders whether pretty suddenly is the understatement of the century.

"He was so angry." Mackenzie whispers, and Kate can detect the fear in her voice under the curiosity. "Is that why..."

"He was drunk. That was all." Kate shakes her head, wanting to make sure that she doesn't paint Mike as the bad guy. Despite the bad blood between them, she is not one to lie. She is not the hero, and Mike is not the villain. After everything, they both made mistakes, and simply became two people that could never get their timing right. "He wasn't... like that when we were together. Things just ended badly with us."

"Oh, crap. You're crying!" Mackenzie observes, moving to wrap Kate in a hug and then apparently stop once she remembered the wax.

"No, it's not you." Kate shakes her head as if breaking herself out of a reverie, reminding herself that Mackenzie is still a child, however mature she is. What was more, she'd apparently realised Kate was crying before she herself had. "I'm okay." She assures Mackenzie, flashing an apologetic wince. And she is. She's happy, with Mackenzie, Dutchy, Malin and a baby on the way. "I'm just really bloody hormonal. I started crying at the RSPCA-approved chickens in Woolies yesterday." She admits.

There's a moment of silence. Then they both start laughing at once.


	22. Chapter 22

The next few weeks fly by without any hint of slowing down. Kate's mornings are wrought with nausea she can't quite seem to shake, and an addiction to oranges, but aside from that Kate finds herself dealing relatively well with the pregnancy. Mackenzie, acting Kate assumes on Dutchy's orders, has become Kate's personal nurse, commenting on everything Kate eats and cooking so many meals that Kate feels she's done a Christmas-worth of comfort eating every day.

Christmas Eve sees Kate and Mackenzie heading out to the lagoon and eating dinner on the esplanade before heading back home and marathoning terrible Christmas movies. "Urgh, I swear Mum dated a guy like that." Mackenzie observes, pointing to the TV. "See, he's the guy that should  _know_ he's only the boyfriend until the love interest comes along."

"Since when are you an expert in love?" Kate scoffs, taking a handful of chips from the packet, before rattling the bag next to Zee's ear. "Or is there more to school than you're telling me?"

"Eww... high school boys are... gross." Zee takes a handful of chips too. "But I maintain I got you and Dutchy together."

"Yeah, okay." Kate concedes. "I will give you that one... just." Kate leans back against the pillows, and just as suddenly sits up. "Alright, quiz me!" Kate demands, flinging a notebook into Zee's lap.

"Oh, come on!" Mackenzie exclaims, her voice rising dramatically.

"Please!"

"I'm watching a movie!" Mackenzie protests, jabbing a hand in the direction of the TV as though Kate might not have seen it. " _We_ are watching a movie. It's a lovely bonding experience."

"Please. Pretty please." Kate rubs a hand on her belly. "For your little niece?"

"You... that's a cheap shot." Mackenzie pokes her tongue out, stabbing the pause button on the movie. "But I couldn't refuse her anything. Does Dutchy still reckon you're having a boy."

"He does. Reckons we should name it Killian." Kate's nose wrinkles at the memory of the name.

"Killian?"

"Hmm... but I won't let that happen. Name like that he'd be a criminal" Kate taps the notebook. "Okay, quiz me! But leave the movie on. I'll need to remember it with... noise and pressure."

"You know how insane you are, right? Then I'm going to lose my place."

"Oh, come on!" Kate seizes the remote and clicks the film back two minutes. "Okay, come on."

"Fine!" Mackenzie throws up her hands in exasperation, turning to gaze at the notebook.  _Mother?_ " Mackenzie demands.

Kate's eyes narrow in concentration, trying to recall the information she'd collected from Dutchy. "His mother is Sofia. Uh... retired. Makes jewellery. Five brothers and sisters."

" _Father_?"

"Harrison. Trains horses. One brother, Luke."

" _Sister?_ "

"Gracie. Works in law. Partner named Stella who is in retail."

Mackenzie makes an exaggerated tick on the notebook. " _Great Great Uncle_?"

Kate's eyes widen, and despite the fact that she's sure of her answer, she still finds herself doubting it. "There is no Great Great Uncle on that list!"

"Err." Mackenzie makes a sound like a buzzer in a game show. "Poor Bertie!"

Kate seizes the list and rolls her eyes. "Oh, very funny. You can't write on my list! Especially when you're writing that Dutchy has a Great Great Uncle who is a..." She consults the addition Mackenzie had made, "...a dancer-slash-poultry enthusiast."

"Never have any fun." Mackenzie grins wickedly. "Alright.  _Grandparents_."

"Sofia's Mother is Grace, who Gracie is named after. She's a widow and lives at the house. She knits for... um..."

"Tick. Tick. Tick." Zee clucks her tongue impatiently.

Kate snaps her finger. "Trauma Teddies!"

"And  _paternal grandparents_?"

"David and Coral. They live in Grafton. They will not be there."

"And list the Littles." Mackenzie demands, referring to Dutchy's younger cousins.

"I'm not going to remember the Littles!" Kate scoffs. "There's like... twenty of them."

"Well..." Mackenzie looks at Kate with a disappointed expression. "Guess they'll throw you out. Grandkids are in order: Sam, Tom, Dutchy, Donna and Grace. They're the olders. And then there's Littles, starting with Hannah, 16, all the way down to Cleo, who's 2. Do you... really need to know all this stuff before? I mean, isn't the point that Dutchy  _introduces_ you to his family? Instead of you stalking out their life stories online?"

Kate winces. "I'm being obsessive, aren't I?"

"Just a... smidge." Zee laughs. "Come on. I'll go get some ice cream and we'll... we'll watch the movie. And Kate... they're going to love you."

* * *

"They're going to know I'm pregnant in about five minutes." Kate observes as she drives along the unfamiliar roads she'd programmed into her SatNav (and promptly triple checked was the right address). One hand leaves the wheel for a moment to rub absent-mindedly over her belly. She'd hoped that the pattern would detract from her stomach, which despite the early weeks has grown quite a bit, but has been having second thoughts about her choice of clothing the entire trip. "I know I'm annoying you with my panic. But am I too..." She trails of, making a vague gesture towards her chest. "I feel like I'm showing... more than I normally do."

"Breasts grow in pregnancy." Mackenzie observes idly, without a trace of the embarrassment Kate is feeling. "If you're asking me if they've grown, then yes. If you're asking me if you're going to get out of the car and someone's going to tell you to get off your corner, then no. Kate, you look nice. You look dressed up, but at the same time casual enough not to look as though you're trying too hard. Which you definitely are by the way. I saw you taped the list of names to your mirror last night."

"I just... everything is..." Kate moves to rake a hand through her hair and stops herself at the last minute, not wanting to disrupt the waves she'd managed to tame in it. "I've never met anyone's parents before and... I want them to like me. To like us. I don't want them to always see me as that woman that swept in and stole their son. And I want Dutchy to get there as soon as he can because I don't want anyone guessing I'm pregnant before he's had a chance to tell his parents.  _And_ when I'm past twelve weeks. But they're going to know in about a minute, what with all this grog and food I can't eat."

"But we've got a seafood allergy, remember?" Mackenzie winks. "And your antibiotics mean you can't have alcohol. And... you don't like soft cheeses and deli meats. And you've given up smoking meth."

Kate lets out a snort of laughter and smiles at her sister. "Thanks, Zee."

* * *

"This house is freaking massive! You didn't tell me they were like basquillionaires!" Mackenzie exclaims as she clambers out of the car. Kate swings her feet out but stills in her actions for a moment, slipping on her shoes. She'd decided to go with flat sandals for the day, weighing up the pros of easy walking versus the cons of how bloody short she looks without them, eventually deciding to go with the comfort option. "And there's so many cars here! And a horse!" Almost unconsciously, Kate pulls her phone out of her handbag and moves to call Dutchy, but finds she has no reception. "Dammit." She curses. "Oh, God, someone's walking down."

"Well, let's get some stuff out of the car. No, I'll grab that. You shouldn't be lifting too much." Mackenzie quips. "Here, you take the fruit salad and I'll take the rest. It's okay. Go greet your future family." Kate throws Mackenzie an incredulous look, but is unable to reply as she closes the boot of her car and finds herself nearly face to face with Dutchy's mother. She's seen pictures of his immediate family and thus knew vaguely what they looked like, but Kate isn't prepared for the raw power and influence this woman seems to possess despite her small stature.

"Mrs Mulholland," Kate shuffles the bowl onto her hip so that she can shake the woman's hand. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. I'm Kate and this is Mackenzie." The woman disregards Kate's hand and wraps her in a tight hug, before moving to Mackenzie to do the same.

"Oh, call me Sofia please. Come in, come in. Oh." She catches sight of the dip, cakes and fruit salad in Kate's hand. "Now, Kate, through no say of my own, I have been instructed by Dylan to leave any food you personally cooked at the door. He said something along the lines of not wanting to spend Christmas night in the emergency room."

Mackenzie snorts with laughter and Kate smiles softly. In any case, the joke breaks the tension, and Kate feels some of the weight she's been feeling lately ease off her. "Well, luckily Zee cooked everything today. Much safer."

* * *

As Sofia leads the way through the house. Kate just has the impression of chaos and children running, just leaping out of the way in time for a pigtailed little girl to dash by. Her brain immediately tries to decide whether that's Louisa or Joanna - both four - when Sofia speaks and leads her through the house. Kate just catches Mackenzie's muttered  _whoa_ as she takes in the high roofs and paintings on the wall. "Now," Sofia begins, "we have about thirty people here at the moment and I know you've probably got no hope of remembering everyone's name, but I'll introduce you to everyone anyway." She leads Kate into the cavernous kitchen. Kate stops only to make sure Mackenzie is still behind her before giving a nervous wave as she feels dozens of eyes on her. She makes eye contact with Gracie across the room and feels a small twinge of relief at at least knowing one person.

Kate recognises most of the names thrown her way, and does her best to associate each with a face, but in a sea of people it's near impossible, so she busies herself with laying containers on the bench-top where platters and platters of food are. "Oh, Darling, sit down. Both of you! Can I get you a drink of anything? We have wine, juice, water. Haven't dolled out the eggnog but."

"Ah, would I be able to just grab a water please?" Mackenzie asks. "Kate, did you want one too? You were thirsty in the car?"

Kate smiles gratefully at Mackenzie. "Thanks, Zee. And Sofia, are you sure I can't do anything to help? Or has Dutchy warned you to keep me out of the kitchen?" Kate finishes.

"Ha. The latter." Gracie laughs. "But don't take it personally."

There's a clatter of noise and they both look up in time to see five kids toddle in. "Food?" One of them asks hopefully.

"You just ate half our cheese dip, Lou-Lou." Louisa's mother - who she's pretty sure is Dutchy's older cousin - laughs, before turning to Kate. "What are you kids doing?"

Kate catches sight of the smallest kid, who looks near two, trying to reach the bench top. In an instant, Kate approaches her, crouching down. "Do you want me to lift you up?"

The girl nods and holds her arms up so that Kate can help her reach a cracker. When Kate moves to put her down though, the young girl clings on, fiddling with Kate's chain. "Dog tags!" Louisa calls excitedly. "You go on the boats too then?" She asks eagerly.

"Yeah." Kate agrees, grateful for a topic of conversation she can talk about. "I'm on shore at the moment, doing mind-numbing policy work, but I used to be on Dutchy - uh, I mean Dylan's boat."

The young girl in her arms continues to fiddle with her dog-tags. "Why do you call him Dutchy?" Louisa asks.

"Ah, it's just a nickname for the Navy. Mulholland. Holland. Dutchy. Just a play on the name I guess. You get called Lou-Lou, right? So that's your nickname."

"What was yours?" Gracie calls out. "Come on, you've just told us three-quarters of us are  _Dutchy_. What about the rest?"

"Well, I've just been  _Boss_ lately. Or  _X,_ when I was the ship's XO. But at ADFA I got  _Spud_ a bit. McGregor - Irish - Spud. Pretty boring. Or Princess Perfect. But that one sucked."

"Ha!" Mackenzie giggles. "Sounds about right." Zee turns to the girl in Kate's arms. "So whose kid have you stolen?"

"Ah, she's mine." A hand is raised from one of the bench chairs in the corner. "She doesn't like many people but you must have the knack. Sorry, just abusing your ability to cuddle her while I drink my wine. Oh, I'm Donna by the way. Dyl's cousin. And that's Cleo."

* * *

"So he's standing there, soaking wet." Gracie laughs. "Mum's car is halfway in the dam and the jerk goes, 'Gracie, I'll give you my pocket money if you take the wrap for this one.' He was grounded for like two years." There's a roar of laughter and Gracie's partner, Stella, leans forward and refills Kate's water with a soft smile. "Or we could talk about the time he blew up the BBQ and almost set the whole farm on fire? He couldn't get it lit and decided to pour some lighter fluid on it. Lost his eyebrows and our dinner."

"And he says I can't cook!" Kate laughs. "Come on, this is fun. He's got all this dirt on me. Feel like I should hear some back."

Kate bounces her knee slightly, wrapping her arms tighter around the young girl still cuddling into her as she perches on the edge of a chair. "Well, we've certainly got plenty of them. Always up to something, Dylan was." Sofia laughs.

"When we first brought Gracie home," Dutchy's dad, Harrison, begins. "And he decided he'd much rather have a brother instead of a sister, put her in a box and tried to lug her to the post office. So Soph and I are freaking out, and we find him halfway down the main road having a big old cuddle and sing-along with her. Hands Gracie back to me and tells me that maybe she's not so bad after all."

"Uncle Dylan's here! Uncle Dylan's here!" There's a sudden mass-exodus as most of the children take off back through the house.

"Wow!" Kate murmurs in the ringing silence that follows.

"Yup." Donna grins. "Favourite Uncle. Or Cousin technically. Basically the littles all call him 'Uncle' anyway." Donna gestures towards Cleo. "Looks like she might have a new favourite Auntie. She's asleep on you. I'll put her on a bed if you're sick of holding her though."

Kate looks down at the sleeping girl's face and finds she quite likes the little girl's weight. "Nah, she's fine."

"Her brother woke us all up at four in the morning." Donna murmurs, tilting her head to peer closer at her daughter. "She'll probably do a fifteen minute powernap on you and be up til all hours this morning, but hey, that's Christmas for you. And maybe the favourite uncle will tyre all the kids out in the pool."

The noise level returns, and Kate can't help the goofy smile that fills her face as she catches sight of him. He scans the room for a moment, then makes a beeline for her. "Merry Christmas." He whispers in her ear, planting a kiss on her cheek. As much as she's missed him, she's grateful he'd kept the PDA to a minimum. "Zee! How are my girls?"

"Merry Christmas! Just been hearing about the time you crashed your Mum's car in the dam. I've been warned not to give you my keys."

"Well, now you're here," Sofia begins. "Presents or food?"

* * *

As Kate catches sight of the enormous pile of presents underneath the tree, she thinks they just might be here until next Christmas unwrapping them. However, with Stella playing Santa and handing presents out, the whole affair takes very little time. The Littles manage to unwrap their presents in no time flat, leaving a trail of wrapping paper and gift bags all over the floor. She's surprised (and pleased) to find out that Mackenzie had just as many presents as the rest of the family did, and she's positively spoiled by an array of clothing, a pair of headphones, a new sketchbook, canvases and a palette of paints. Kate had bought her a mobile phone, but they'd decided to give that to her away from everyone else, so she would recieve that tonight. Kate herself gets a dress and jewellery from Mackenzie, and a bracelet from Dutchy. Gracie gives Kate a whole lot of bathbombs and hand creams (Kate later finds out Stella is high up in Lush), and from Sofia and Harrison she and Dutchy get a holiday voucher.

Then, dispersed with orders to  _wash your hands. And I'd better smell soap_ , they all file into lines in front of whichever sink they can find in the house and begin to dine. "And how's the littlest sailor?" Dutchy's hand brushes lightly against her stomach as he pulls her aside out of earshot of everyone else.

"Demanding. Hungry. Stubborn." Kate answers, kissing him passionately. "And I have been waiting a long time to do that."

"Really?" Dutchy peers at her in mock consideration. "Because there's a few things I've been waiting a long time to do as well."

"Hmmmm..." Kate hums in affirmation. "Then you'll like the present I got you." She whispers.

"What is it?" He asks.

"Well, it's red, and lacy, and it's something to unwrap."

And grinning at the pained look on Dutchy's face, she pulls him back into the kitchen.

* * *

"Uh. I couldn't eat another bite." Kate groans, refusing the plate of Christmas pudding Sofia is trying to pass her way. "Thanks. It was delicious."

On the smaller table, the Littles are reading out terrible Christmas jokes in painstakingly slow voices, and Kate finds she's deliriously happy as she readjusts Dutchy's Christmas hat and smiles. Cleo toddles over for another cuddle, and Mackenzie is deep in conversation with one of Dutchy's cousins about her bright hair colour. Kate can tell that dying hair will be the topic of conversation on the way home, but she finds she can't bring herself to care.

"Can we go in the pool?" Soon there is a loud chant of  _pool pool pool,_ and much clambering for Dutchy to take them.

Dutchy smirks. "Only if Kate comes in too." He grins. Knowing she's about to be assaulted by the pleading of half Dutchy's family, Kate rolls her eyes.

"Alright. Let's go!"

* * *

"You've got almost as many scars as Dylan." Gracie observes from the poolside from where she's holding a video camera lazily in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. Beside her, Stella is curled into her side, looking extremely glamorous in a pair of gigantic sunglasses and a floppy hat. From the pool, the Littles have armed themselves with water pistols, the battalion led by Dutchy, while on the deck, the adults lob water-bombs and pieces of ice. "Seen some drama then?"

Kate fingers the scar on her arm. "Yeah. Just a graze."

"From what?" Isla demands from her spot atop an inflatable flamingo, pausing in her siege on the adults.

"Uh..." Kate glances at the six year old, before settling on the simplest version of the truth. "A bad man shot me."

Isla's eyes bug out. "With a gun?" She catches sight of three marks on Kate's hip. "Are they bullets too?"

"No." Kate lowers herself into the water, feeling very wary of all the eyes on her, and tugs her tankini down lower, so that the two pieces of fabric overlap. "Just... they're old."

She can feel Mackenzie's eyes on her, and holds her arms out for Cleo, so that she has something to do. The young girl, supported by floaties and sitting in a tiny inflatable boat, grins and jumps into Kate's arm. Calling over to Dutchy, she yells, "I've got us a boat, Petty Officer."

Dutchy gives a laugh and makes a swim for the boat. "Aye Ma'am. Here!" He throws a water pistol towards her. She reaches out and grabs it, still holding Cleo on one hip. A moment later a waterbomb hits Zee squarely on the ear. Without hesitating, Kate turns the waterpistol on the offender, Dutchy's cousin Tom, and gets him full in the face. Spluttering and laughing, Tom calls back.

"Think there's a bit of a tactical advantage there. We've got two weapons experts and she's holding a baby!"

In response, Kate squirts him again, and cops a water bomb to the edge of the pool in retaliation. It bursts and splashes her, and she gasps as icy cold water soaks her. "That's freezing!" She calls back.

Tom laughs. "Ice water, Commander!"

* * *

Two hours later they're all drying and wrapped in towels. Most of the Littles were being hustled, blue-lipped, into showers by their parents, and Kate is just refilling her water when Mackenzie comes up behind her. "Can we talk?"

"Zee..." Kate knows what she's about to ask, and finds herself shaking her head.

"Those marks. They're... they're cigarette burns, aren't they? That's why everyone went quiet when they saw."

"They're..." Even though she'd known from the moment Mackenzie noticed them, that she'd ask, she still doesn't feel ready for the question. How do you explain away something like that happening at the hand of someone who's supposed to love you. "They're from a long time ago, Zee."

Mackenzie swallows. "Did Mum do that?"

Kate sighs. "It... it doesn't matter."

"It does to me. If she could do something like that. She... I'm sitting here wishing she could see this... this happy day, and you've got that-"

"She changed." Kate cuts in, pressing a hand to Mackenzie's cheek. "Okay? Some days things were bad but... she changed for you. And I'm so glad she did."

"But it's not fair-"

"I know." Kate nods soberly. "But... you are allowed to miss her. You're allowed to be sad she's gone. Because I am. Sometimes."

"How can you miss her-"

"Do you know what I remembered? I must have been... oh... eight or nine? It was Christmas Eve. And all I wanted to do was build a snow castle. And she sat out there in the snow with me all day, teeth chattering, to help me build that. She had this... this warm jacket. But I was cold and I remember when she put it on me out there I just felt so safe. I've got... good memories of her and I've got bad. But you don't need to take on my bad memories. Just remember the mother she was to you. Okay?" Kate pulls Zee into a hug. "She'd want you happy on Christmas."

"Thanks." Zee whispers, before clapping a hand to her forehead. "Ah, crap! I was meant to tell you Dutchy's looking for you. He's out on the front veranda I think."

"And are you sure you're okay?" Kate presses, not willing to leave her if she's upset. But Mackenzie nods, a small smile.

"I'm sure. Go. I'm going to go have a shower."

* * *

"Dutchy?" Kate calls out as she reaches the front veranda. At first glance, it looks deserted, and Kate wonders vaguely whether Mackenzie has just lied to get her to leave. For a moment she's torn between running back for Zee, sure this whole thing is a trick, or some weird defence mechanism. But then she hears the front door open and close, and looks up to see Dutchy. Tying her towel firmly around her, she moves towards him. "It's beautiful out here."

"Yeah." Dutchy agrees, staring out at the grass. "Although I must admit I still love the sea. Did... uh... Zee tell you I was looking for you?"

"Yeah. We had a bit of a chat."

"She didn't know about them, did she?" Dutchy murmurs.

"I'd forgotten they were there when I got changed. I usually have them hidden anyway but... I think she'll be okay."

"That's good." Dutchy nods, looking nervous. "I was worried how you'd go."

"No, your family is lovely." Kate assures him. "This whole day has been like something out of a dream. It's been incredible."

"Well, you did impress them with your remembering all their names."

"Ha. So I bet you're here to tease me about panicking and..." Kate trails off as Dutchy takes a step closer, with such a serious and purposeful look on his face she stops talking. "What are you doing?"

"I know there's been a lot of changes lately in such a small space of time. But... I wouldn't have it any other way. You and Mackenzie and our baby. I love you. And I wanted to ask you," Kate's eyes widen as Dutchy gets down on one knee, one hand over her mouth. "Kate, I want to be with you forever. I love you with everything I have. So... will you marry me?" Kate exhales as Dutchy opens a ring box in front of her eyes.

"If you need time to think about-"

"Yes. Yes, I'll marry you. Yes. Oh my gosh!" And as Dutchy slides the ring on her finger, and they have their first kiss as fiancees, and the entire Mulholland Christmas gathering sit peeking at the front window, Kate wonders whether it's possible to be any happier than here and now.


	23. Chapter 23

**Christmas Continued:**

"It's so peaceful I don't want to leave." Kate murmurs as the horse she's patting nuzzles into her shoulder. Dutchy smirks and wraps his arms around her waist, looping them on the slight swell of her belly.

"I know it's early still but... seeing you with the kids, and especially Cleo. I just... can't wait til he's born."

Kate hums as the breeze plays against her face, sending her hair across her eyes. She finds she can't suppress the smile that spreads across her face as she thinks about everything that has happened. But despite her peace, she can't resist a jibe as she rests her own hands on top of his own. "I'm telling you, Dutchy. It's a girl."

"You can't know that." Dutchy smirks, thumb brushing against her hand and - her smile widens - her engagement ring.

"Mother's intuition?" Kate supplies teasingly. Almost compulsively, she glances at the ring on her finger once more, her smile now positively splitting her face. "I never thought I'd be this happy." She murmurs.

Dutchy lets her lean on him for a moment before unwrapping them and tugging on her hand, nodding in the direction of the house. "Come on. You ain't seen Mulholland game night yet."

Kate bites her lip. "I have to warn you... I'm rubbish at Pictionary."

"Lucky it's not those sorts of games." Dutchy winks, pulling her towards the house once more.

* * *

"We play not just for ourselves, but for pride!" Tom's voice rings out through the oddly quiet kitchen. Kate half feels as though she's slipped into a NAVCOM briefing the way that everyone silently stares as she and Dutchy enter the room. Kate opens her mouth, not quite sure if she's going to ask a question or apologise, but Tom continues on with his speech. As she observes the room, she sees it's mostly split by gender, and Stella makes a fanatical sort of pat towards the chair next to her, firmly on the 'girl' side of the room. "We play for bragging rights!" Tom continues, slamming his hand into his fist. "We play for our family! For our children! For our children's children!" He glances over in one of the corners of the room, on the men's side. "And random ring-in cousins and sudden fiances." He adds, and he holds his speech for a moment for a polite, scattered applause.

After a moment, Tom holds his hand up for silence, and it's a silence that does come. "Many of you have played before, so you know what is at stake. Eleven rounds of games, with the winning gender claiming all those fabulous gifts and prizes. They gain respect. And Christmas leftovers. And the honour to be excluded from washing up." Three chairs down, Mackenzie catches Kate's eye and holds her hands out in question. It's all Kate can do to shrug. "But most of all, we play for the pride of our gender."

" _Go the girls!_ " Donna breaks the silence, hands cupped around her mouth, and the room splits into equal parts cheers and boos.

Once again, Tom holds his hand up for silence. "Eleven rounds. So let's get started with our first contenders! You know 'em! You love 'em. It's Harrison and Sofia!" The little's, hopped up on sugar and excitement, start to stamp their feet and cheer for their allotted winner, before falling respectfully silent. "Round One:  _Gotta Keep 'Em Separated._  The competition is simple. Each of you must race to be the first to sort the colours of your bag of Skittles into their allotted cups. Cheering is encouraged. Cheating will be punished." As the room breaks into cheers and applause once more, and the Littles start thumping the table in excitement, Kate turns in confusion to Stella.

"So, they're seriously just sorting lollies into five cups?" She lowers her head to Stella's ear in order to be heard. "That's what everyone is here for? I've had lesser briefings for terrorist attacks!" Beside her, Stella snorts with laughter.

"Ah, we each bring different games to the table every year. Girls and boys devise six each, and then we always do  _Magic Carpet_ for one round for the Littles, and they just all go and it's majority rules. The boys were so upset when Cleo was born... they were all banking on more boys. Gets pretty competitive. And I think Tom's planning on pitting you against Dutchy in a few rounds, so be warned. We voted on who plays before everyone got here. We pick the opposite teams. I'm uncoordinated, and you and Zee are fresh meat, so it's almost certain we'll all be playing at some point. And we always put Harrison and Sofia in."

Kate's head spins with this information. "Wait, what?"

She frowns, but a moment later Tom is calling out, "On your marks, get set,  _Go!"_ Kate can barely hear herself think in the cacophony of noise that follows. She has no idea what is happening or who is winning, but all the same she finds herself cheering for Sofia along with the rest of the females. A moment later half the room groans, the other cheering as Sofia raises her hands victoriously in the air, with cups of neatly sorted Skittles in each hand.

"See, Sofia was a shoe-in for this round. They get to pick the team, but not who plays what. Tom is neutral this year - we vote on an adjudicator every year. But Sofia spends half her life sorting beads to make jewellery."

Completely fascinated, Kate watches in awe as the gathering play game after game with such fierce competition it's as if it's a real sport. Stella, nominated as per her own prediction, comes off second to Luke, Harrison's brother, in some sort of game where each has to balance a cookie on their forehead and move it to their mouth without using Luke.

"Are false teeth an advantage, Uncle Luke?" Gracie heckles, and once again the room splits into cheers and boos in equal measure.

"Insolence! These are all my own." Luke grins back as Stella moves back in between Gracie and Kate.

The Littles round is chaotic, as the coffee table in the living room and mat have to be moved. When the area is prepared, however, the Littles are each organised in a line, all sitting expectantly on a towel each.  _"Magic_  Carpet?" Kate asks Stella, who nods. As Tom starts the race, all ten Littles (or all those under thirteen anyway) take off, having to scooch across to the end of the living room and back sitting on a beach towel, again not able to have their hands or feet touch the bare ground. It's clear some of the children, like Cleo and Louisa, are enthusiastic but not quite understanding of the rules, and are quietly disqualified, though not to their faces. In the end, the round goes to the boys, and they all return to the table once more.

Once again, true to Stella's prediction, Mackenzie's name is called for  _Round Four: This Blows._ She goes pale when her name is called, but still staggers up to the kitchen bench to verse one of Dutchy's older cousins, Sam. For Mackenzie's game, she has to repeatedly blow up a balloon and use the released air to knock over her entire line of ten plastic cups. For this, she is glad to see that Dutchy cheers for Zee too, completely disregarding calls of  _traitor_ and smiling as she is declared the winner of the round.

There's a game that's almost a cross between beer pong and  _tic-tac-toe_ , where each player either has a bucket of pink ping-pong balls or a bucket of blue, and must bounce the balls like regular pong into the square of nine. First to get three in a line, like in  _tic-tac-toe_ is declared the winner. This is closely followed by a challenge to stack objects in a floating bowl without knocking the items over, and Kate marvels at how much preparation must have gone into each game, and money for feathers and blocks and cups and balls.

"So Tom buys everything?" Kate marvels.

Stella shrugs, the box of cookies she'd previously been challenged with in between her and Gracie. "He was voted, and he's got a whole year to prep. It's a pride thing. The games have to be better each year."

Part of her is dreading being called, the other is quite looking forward to it, and as Tom talks them into  _Round Eleven: What's Love without a Little Blowing_ (Half the table almost chokes at the name), all eyes turn to Kate and Dutchy in turn. Tom gives her a mischievous smile and winks. "Now, before you two arrived, both teams agreed they were okay with rigging the final round so it was you both versing each other." Kate groans and peers around to see them all snickering. "So let's cement this relationship in the Mulholland way! Step up here for our last round!"

Knowing she has no choice, Kate groans and rises to her feet, suddenly not feeling any joy in the games whatsoever. Not only did she get to make a fool of herself, but it was a freaking tie breaker, as Tom had just finished reminding them. "We all know what's at stake. The pressure is on. So suck in a deep breath, because we're blowing our way out of these games!" There's a loud intermission of cheering and catcalling before Tom manages to regain silence. "Your mission is simple. Using your bottles of dishwashing liquid and water, and your hands, you will make bubbles. Now," He starts to pace, like he's on a real game show. "One of my perverse specialties is making bubbles with dishwashing liquid, so let's hope you can both get it right, or Uncle Dutchy might not be the favourite anymore."

" _Show him Kate!"_ Donna cries out enthusiastically, her own hair still covered in the silly string used for her round. "You will each stand on your mat," Tom indicates a door mat at one end of the kitchen, "Until you have successfully formed a floating bubble. You will then move, without touching it once more, to the other end of the room, where your aim is to get as many  _freefloating_ bubbles through the hoops in two minutes. Once your bubble is either through the hoop, or popped, you return and start again. And we have employed the  _Littles_ to keep score. Now, Lovebirds, all good?"

Kate and Dutchy catch each other's eyes for a moment, and see the same pre-mission determination on each face. "Let's do this!" Kate grins.

* * *

"I still reckon Kate cheated!" Sam calls out from his place in the kitchen, staring glumly at his own hands encased in bright pink rubber gloves.

"How exactly did I cheat?" Kate challenges, catching sight of Dutchy mutely returning clean cuttlery to the drawers and grinning.

"She had good air on her side." Sam protests.

"Oh, come on!" Sam's wife, a woman named Renee, scoffs, rolling her eyes at the men dejectedly doing the washing up. "We won, fair and square! And, Darling, there's still a spot on that plate."

"A bad tradesman always blames his tools." Gracie heckles.

"You are a tool!" Sam grumbles back good-naturedly, before turning to Harrison.

"If you hadn't have fumbled the Skittles-"

Harrison shook his head, apparently beyond caring for the games. "I have arthritis-"

"And you lost your round to Mackenzie-" Tom points out. "And  _you_!" He points at Dutchy, then, still maintaining eye contact, blows a perfect detergent bubble.

"Well, if you hadn't have picked stupid games-"

"Is it always like this?" Kate murmurs in Stella's ear, as debate flares up from all sides.

Stella laughs, running a hand through her hair. "Oh, yeah. There as bad as the kids, really. They'll whinge for hours, we'll get a blow by blow analysis. But in an hour they'll be planning for next year. Or it'll end like last year."

Gracie hums in affirmation, before catching Kate's eye and filling her in. "Oh. Yeah, it ended in a massive water fight which sort of snowballed into a homemade slip and slide on the hill. Until  _someone_ broke his arm." She raises her voice, poking her tongue out at Sam. In response, Sam flips his cousin off.

"Yo, Renee, why's he so upset about it?" Gracie hisses across the table, so that the boys can't hear. Renee smirks.

"We doubled down. Loser has to do the washing up all year." She winks. Catching Kate's incredulous gaze, she winks. "Hey, it's a competitive family. And I'd say, you and Zee are firmly in."

* * *

After saying goodbye to what seems like twice the amount of people who were actually there, being hugged by all of the Littles at least once and having her engagement ring admired from all angles, Kate, Dutchy and Mackenzie finally stand outside her car. Kate has sore feet and a sore belly from laughing and eating too much, but she's still grinning as she mock examines the now clean containers Mackenzie had brought her food in. "Yeah, I'd say you boys did an alright job." She grins, putting them into the back of her car.

"It's really annoying..." Dutchy begins. "But you're just really cute when you're smug."

Mackenzie makes her way between them. "Okay, Lovebirds, save it for home. I got something for you both. But I didn't want to give it to you in there because... well, it's not much, but open it." She tugs a wrapped flat rectangular package from the back of the car, hidden unbeknown to Kate underneath an old towel. Perplexed, Kate begins to unwrap it, and is in awe at the picture illuminated by the internal car lights.

"Wow, Zee! This is..." She claps a hand over her mouth as she takes in the sketch Mackenzie has done. It's a charcoal sketch, unmistakably Kate and Dutchy, his hands wrapped around her swollen belly. "This is..."

"I mean, it... like, if you don't like it, I... oh, crap." Mackenzie trails off as Kate dissolves into tears.

"Kate?"

"I'm sorry. It's so beautiful." She hugs Mackenzie in thanks. "And I had a great day. And I don't know why I'm crying."

"Hormones." Dutchy and Mackenzie murmurs together, before Dutchy turns to Mackenzie. "And this is the most beautiful gift, Mackenzie. I love it."

Kate hiccups in agreement, clutching the picture to her chest.

* * *

Ten minutes later and Kate has calmed down enough to stop crying and in turn, she and Dutchy give Mackenzie the mobile they'd bought for her. Then, getting eaten alive by mosquitos and all ready for a nap, they say their goodbyes. "See you at home." Kate murmurs, pecking Dutchy on the cheek before climbing into her car.

They buckle themselves in, but Mackenzie holds a hand to stop Kate as she goes to key the ignition. "Come on!" Zee squeals, "Show me the ring, Dude!"

Kate rolls her eyes but extends her hand anyway, Mackenzie oohing and aahing. Kate crinkles her nose. "Did you know? Beforehand I mean?"

Mackenzie laughs, releasing Kate's hand. "Yeah he asked me ages ago. Uh, first when he asked me if I thought it was okay, then whether I could find out your ring size. _And I did a pretty good job if you ask me!_ Then he asked me if I thought you'd get offended if he asked... you know, with the baby. He's had the ring for ages."

"He has?" She frowns.

"Kate, I feel like I say this a bajillion times a day so repeat after me,  _Dutchy loves Kate._ " Mackenzie is silent for a moment, before adding, "And... thank you. For always making me feel part of the family. I know, it's hard sometimes, but..."

"Zee, you'll always be part of our family. Always. Promise."


	24. Chapter 24

Kate almost faints when she opens the door and sees Maxine standing in the doorway. Taking a hurried step backwards, she clutches the wall for support and manages to just stammer out her main concern.

"D... Dutchy?" In any other situation, Kate would have felt embarrassed at the near whimper in her tone, but this is not any other time, and instead she takes in Maxine's harrowed look and tense demeaner. However, almost immediately Maxine's eyes widen too, as if she's only just realised what Kate might think having the Commander of NAVCOM knock on her door at 2000 hours. She holds up her hands in apparent surrender.

"No, no. He's fine. I..." She drops her Navy cap and reaches forwards, as though about to reach out and touch Kate's shoulder in comfort but then, apparently thinking better of it, she draws them back to her side. "Mulholland is fine.  _Everyone_ on  _Hammersley_  is fine. Uh... I've just heard they've managed to apprehend a major iceboat, actually."

Kate's heart is still thumping. She can't quite calm down; she knows Maxine wouldn't have come here after a day of seeing her at work just to talk about  _Hammersley_ 's latest mission. "That's... great?" She can't quite keep the question from the comment. "Um, would you like to come in?"

Maxine nods politely, and Kate leads her into the living room. "Tea? Coffee?"

"Kate, I am here to talk about you and Dylan Mulholland. About your relationship." Kate stills, halfway to the kettle, her heart redoubling its pounding. Slowly, Kate turns, and notes Maxine looks just as nervous as she is. "It's come to my attention that the two of you  _are_  in a serious relationship."

Kate suddenly wishes she'd worn a looser jumper. If Maxine guessed... but then she remembers that they've broken no rules anyway. "Ma'am, we're not serving together. We haven't done anything wrong." Once again, Maxine holds up both her hands, but Kate hastens to add, "Dylan has done nothing wrong."

"Kate, listen to me! I'm not here as a Commander. I... I'm  _not_  here with information. Information I am  _not_  sharing with you because that would be illegal." Kate frowns, but says nothing. Wordlessly, she gestures to the lounge, and Maxine sits. A second later, Malin jumps up onto her lap, and Maxine flinches. "Bloody cat." She mutters, but pats him all the same.

"Ma'am?" Kate prompts, curiously.

Maxine looks up at Kate, and there's something akin to regret in her eyes. "Kate, there was a time when I stepped in between a relationship of yours. I used my position to force your hand. What I did was wrong. My only defense is that I only knew what I knew and Mike is my friend. And I wanted to protect him. If I had have realised the depth of your mutual feelings-"

"Mike and I are over." Kate interrupts. "And if you're here on his orders about Mackenzie-"

"No. I'm not..." She takes a deep breath. "The Navy is looking at assembling a new team to engage in covert operations in The Middle East. Petty Officer Mulholland's contract is up at the end of April and he is at the top of their list."

Kate's heart pounds. "No. But... Why are you telling me this? He can't go!"

"Knowing that both of you would feel that way, I came. But Kate, you know as well as I do that as a girlfriend-" She catches sight of Kate's ring, and corrects herself. "Fiancee even. Congratulations. But the Navy has no reason to keep you two posted in the same place."

"But, well then why are you here?"

"I might have a solution. Of sorts. And knowing that you're engaged..." She shakes her head. "I know it seems ridiculous me saying it but if you were to be married within that time frame, I could prevent them transferring him. Navy wouldn't transfer husband and wife that far apart from each other if they were both against it so strongly, and they won't want to risk losing either of you by having you quit."

"But-"

"Kate, I'm telling you as a friend, because I know this can help. Do it or not." She rises, and then looks back, sadness in her eyes. "Kate, I've never seen you this happy. And I wanted to help. I... I don't have any real female friends but... I don't want to see you heartbroken again."

She turns to leave once more, but Kate stops her. "Maxine?" The name feels odd on her tongue, but this is not the place to call her ma'am. "Mike and I ended, but it wasn't because of you. And thank you. For putting your neck out for us." She hesitates for a moment more, before gesturing towards the TV. "And if you ever need a friend, Friday nights are bad chick flick night. You're welcome to join Mackenzie and I anytime."

* * *

As Kate leans back against the front door, she hears tiptoeing footsteps down the stairs. "You heard everything, I take it?" Kate calls out, and the footsteps pause for a moment, before moving in a more purposeful manner towards her. A few seconds later, Mackenzie appears, a pencil tucked behind her ear.

"Yeah." She admits sheepishly. "I tried not to eavesdrop but..." She trails off. "So... marriage?"

Kate drags a hand over her face. "He's back in port in two days. I'll get the dating scan done and then... figure out the rest of this. I just... I just knew things were going to go bad and-"

Zee wrinkles her nose and leans against the door next to Kate. "And is that so bad? Getting married?" She challenges.

"No." Kate shakes her head. "But it's too soon and everyone's going to think it's because I'm pregnant and-"

"So what? Stuff what everyone else thinks! You know the truth! Kate, just... talk to Dutchy."

"Yeah." Kate exhales deeply. "Yeah."

* * *

As Kate stands on the wharf, she finds herself wringing her hands anxiously. She still couldn't shake the feeling that something was off, and once again she pressed her hands to her stomach, as though by sheer osmosis she could gain some of her child's calm.

Part of her wants Mackenzie there, but the girl is off with some friends from school, watching  _Ralph Breaks the Internet_ , and anyway she knows that she's coming to put too much responsibility on Mackenzie. Despite her wisdom, Mackenzie is still a child, and Kate doesn't want to destroy what is left of her childhood by turning her into a therapist.

Catching sight of  _Hammersley_ on the horizon, Kate strengthens her resolve. In an hour, she and Dylan will be seeing their child for the first time.  _And then you'll feel better and all of this..._

Bird squeals as she dashes over to Kate, wrapping her in a tight hug before scrabbling with Kate's hand. "I was so excited he finally asked you!" Her voice is so high that Kate sees a flock of seagulls take flight to their left. "It's so romantic!"

2Dads joins, and even though Kate is expecting his usual tongue-in-cheek attitude, she's pleasantly surprised when he smiles at her. "Congratulations Ma'am."

She frowns suspiciously at him, still waiting for the punchline. When none come, she shakes her head in confusion. "No jokes? No sly comments?"

2Dads adopts a shocked look on his face. "Ma'am! I'm shocked you would think I would joke about something as joyous as-"

"Dutchy threatened him already." Cook answers, pulling up beside them. "He'll be here in a minute. He's just with the CO. And congratulations, Ma'am. Set a date?"

"Ah, not officially, but we were thinking early 2020?" Kate suggests, hoping that Bird isn't about to start quizzing her about dresses and flowers and cake.

"Will you two be at the pub tonight?" Bird asks, "Because I have some magazines..."

"Ah... not too sure yet." Kate interjects. "We'll let you know."

They all say their goodbyes, Kate anxiously checking her watch every minute. But she only has to wait five minutes before she sees him dash along the wharf to meet her. "Hey!" He greets, and she breathes in the smell of him, feeling her heart slow, just a little. He was back. Everything would be okay, because he was back.

"Hello." She smiles back, tucking her hair behind her ears as they start to walk back down the wharf. "2Dads was oddly reserved."

"Good." Dutchy grins, looping his fingers into hers. "We going straight there?"

"Yeah, if that's alright with you." Kate leads the way to the car. She clambers into the drivers seat, the music she'd been playing to distract her from her thoughts blaring as she starts the engine. Immediately she adjusts the volume, before reversing out of the carpark.

"You alright?" Dutchy frowns, his brow furrowed. As Kate glances over at him, she sees a cut on the side of his head, just behind his right ear.

"I... yeah. Sorry. Just... thinking about work and... nervous about this, I suppose."

"It's going to be okay."

"But sometimes I just feel..." She hesitates for a moment, then ploughs on. "It's like I'm... too happy. Like something's going to have to give and... I'm scared, what that's going to be. Look, just... tell me something. Distract me. I... uh... heard you guys brought down an iceboat. That's great. Is that how you injured yourself?"

Even though Kate can tell Dutchy has by no means dropped his concerns, he obliges by telling her all the stories of the most recent patrol, which fills the drive to the hospital and the walk up to the ward. By the time they've checked in and seated themselves on the seats, Kate is fidgeting and checking her watch. "Tell me about Zee. Or..."

"It's not nerves." Kate cuts him off, mostly truthfully this time. The panic is still there, but Kate has a more pressing matter. "Well, not just nerves. Do you know how much water I had to drink for this? I'm busting."

Dutchy just manages to suppress his snort of laughter.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later finds Kate on her back on the hospital bed, cold gel smeared all over her stomach. Dutchy is standing next to her, brushing Kate's hair from her face in an absentminded sort of way as he questions the ultrasound technician. "So I know you can't really see clearly until 16 weeks but can you tell whether it's a boy or a girl? You know? Sneak peek? I mean, not that we mind. We're just so bloody excited and we've got a bet on. She reckons girl but I still think it's a boy." Dutchy turns between Kate and the ultrasound technician. "You right, Kate?" But Kate is not looking at Dutchy. Her hand grips his tight as she focuses all her attention on the ultrasound tech, who has a slight frown on her face.

Kate's insides drop. She'd known, known it was all too good to be true. Of course, she couldn't have a child. It was selfish, pure selfishness to risk bringing a baby into the world at her age, to get Dutchy's hopes up when she was always just a card house waiting to come tumbling down. "Something's wrong, isn't it?" Kate murmurs, and she's surprised by just how normal her voice sounds. "I... I can feel it. Something's..."

Dutchy shakes his head. "It's alright, Kate. It's..." He catches sight of the technicians face and his smile drops too. Almost unconsciously, his hand reaches Kate's, and he squeezes.

"If you'd give me one moment, I am just going to call the doctor."She closes her eyes, and has a memory of blood and cramping and horrible,  _horrible_ twisting.  _I can't lose another baby._

"I..." Dutchy breathes in shakily. "It's going to be okay." She doesn't bother to respond. What is there to say?

The wait is the longest she's ever experienced. In some distant part of her mind she knows that she's sat in RHIBs for hours on end, been on watch for long, sleepless nights, but this... this is an entirely different type of waiting. A waiting that she just wants to end and yet, when it does, she knows it will all be over. Their happiness, the bubble. Their child.

And what if Dutchy leaves too? Would he go to The Middle East? Would he be safe? With another pang, she thinks of the family she'd found in Dutchy's - Gracie and Stella and Donna and Renee and Sofia and the whole family, opening up to her. And she'll lose that too.

She sits there trying to control her shaking, and avoiding Dutchy's gaze. She knows that he needs comfort too, that he's scared and confused and seeking reassurance that it  _will_ be okay, just like he is telling her. But she can't unclasp her jaw.

There's a squeaking of shoes as the technician arrives, alongside another woman. Kate glances at the new arrival, purely for something to do, but catalogues only a vague collection of dark skin, purple scrubs and brilliant curls. Beyond that, she doesn't look, because she can't bear to examine the expression, to see the regret and loss on someone else's face.

"Miss McGregor, have you experienced any difficulties in your pregnancy?" She asks in a no-nonsense sort of tone.

"No." Kate couples the word with a shake of her head. That was the worst part. She'd been  _happy._ She'd been  _healthy._ But she'd also been worried. Had her pessimism killed her baby?

The doctor takes her glasses off, and tucks them into her pocket, asking something else that Kate doesn't bother listening to. Will Dutchy leave straight away? Or will they sit in the house, separated as though by miles, clinging to opposite sides of the bed?

"You serious?!" Dutchy splutters, catching Kate's attention. "Multiple? Ah, my grandmother is a twin. I..."

"What?" Kate frowns, looking between them all. Inexplicably, Dutchy is smiling.

"As far as I can see here, you've got two healthy fetuses in here." The technician fiddles with the screen, and a pounding of a heartbeat fills the room. "Congratulations, both of you. You're having twins."

* * *

"Twins?" Mackenzie repeats, as though she's never heard of such a thing. Her jaw had dropped when she'd arrived home and they'd told her, or at least, Dutchy had. Kate had left him to do the talking, still too dazed and relieved and scared to speak coherently.

"Yep. Twins." Dutchy agrees, nodding in a dazed sort of way. The diagnosis had obviously taken him by surprise as well, but unlike Kate, who was still filled with dread and fear, Dutchy was just over the moon.

"Huh." Mackenzie props her chin up on her hand. "What happens if you accidentally swap them?"

"Zee!" Dutchy groans.

"Well, think about it." Mackenzie muses. "I mean, how many twins do you think are the baby they were named? Or if like the parents were super tired and accidentally put Baby Jonny into Baby Bobby's cot by mistake?"

"Gee, thanks for that cheerful thought." Dutchy frowns. "Can you put... like... toenail polish on one?" He adds hopefully. Mackenzie lets out a low whistle. Kate presses her head into her hands, speaking for the first time, her voice slightly muffled through her fingers.

"Well, there's... gonna be lots of hospital appointments. With my age and this already being risky because they're in the same placenta, so there's a risk of them getting sick. There's this thing called Twin-to-Twin Syndrome and-" Dutchy cuts her off by grabbing her hand and shaking his head almost imperceptively. Kate knows what's wrong as soon as she catches sight of Mackenzie, looking as terrified as she had the day they'd turned off Debbie's life support, and hastens to backtrack. "Anyway, I'll have to have lots of ultrasounds and stuff to make sure everything's okay."

"But, you'll be okay, right?" Mackenzie presses. "I mean, you'll be fine. You're strong and... and everything."

Words are still flying around in her head, words she'd never heard before today, like  _monochorionic_ and  _diamnionic._ But she forces herself to smile, nodding at her sister. "Oh, Zee people have been giving birth in paddocks since the dawn of time. I'll be fine. I only mention it because there might be times when I'm not as... you might be home alone a bit more than I'd have liked."

Mackenzie seems to sag a little in relief that Kate is apparently going to be okay, before shrugging lightly and saying, "Well, I guess I get to watch what I want."

And in spite of herself, Kate snickers. "You get to do homework  _then_  watch what you want." She corrects.

* * *

"You alright?" Dutchy murmurs as he climbs into bed next to Kate. She'd previously been staring off into space, replaying everything that happened today. She couldn't believe that inside her were two tiny people, steadily growing. "You want to talk about that other thing?"

"What other thing?" She rolls over so that she can look at him and gains only a raised eyebrow in response. "Okay. But just hear me out." Kate begins. She's unaccountably nervous. Dutchy had proposed to her after all. But what if he  _wanted_ to go on the posting? "Maxine came to see me. Unofficially. She had seen some papers and it concerned you."

"Me?" Dutchy frowns, propping himself up on his elbow. "How?"

She takes a deep breath. "When your contract's up, the brass want to send you back to The Middle East." The words tumble from her in a rush. "You're... you're top of their list."

"But... no. I can't leave you. I won't!"

Kate rubs a hand unconsciously against her belly, drawing comfort from the light swell. "Maxine was saying that the Navy are under no obligation to keep us together because..."

"We're not married." Dutchy finishes the thought, and they both lapse into silence, save from the chirping of the crickets and squeaking of bats outside.

"Dutchy, if you want to go-" Kate begins, but Dutchy interrupts her, an incredulous look on his face. In fact, he's looking at her as though he had never seen her before.

"Of course I don't!" He snaps.

"Okay?"

"Well, how could you even think that? We just found out we're having twins in seven months! Closer, probably, seeing as they'll probably be premmie!"

"I just wanted to..."

"No!" Dutchy hisses angrily, still keeping his voice down so as not to wake Mackenzie, even though he's obviously still furious with her. "When are you going to get it through your head that I want to be here? I mean, I know you've got abandonment issues but... we're going around in bloody circles here."

"I know!" Kate clenches her fists into the sheets, her voice cracking. "I know, okay? I just... I can't..."

"Can't what?" Dutchy snaps, but a moment later he shakes his head and repeats himself, softer this time. "Can't what, Kate? Talk to me."

She does her best to try to explain the sense of doom she's had following her around, even though she doesn't quite know how to explain it either. "I keep feeling as though something is going to go wrong. I've got this voice in my head saying it's all going to end and today... I really thought I'd lost it. And that I'd lost you, and our family and... and  _yours._ That I'd let you down. I just can't shake this feeling. And I know I'm driving Mackenzie crazy and you and... it's driving  _me_ crazy, because it's like there's an alarm clock in my head that I know is going to go off but I just don't know when."

"Maybe... maybe you should see that guy... Ash. The therapist. Because to me it seems like anxiety. Kate, you shouldn't be feeling this way. And... maybe if someone or something can help then... we should do it. We can find a solution." He hesitates for a moment, then pulls her into his arms, tucking his chin at the top of her head. "Is there anything  _I_ can do? Do you want to... to talk about stuff or talk about something else or..."

"I need you to promise me something." She whispers, and it's easier, when she can't see his face, to express the fear that's been filling her since she first realised she might be pregnant.

"Promise you what?" Dutchy presses a kiss to her forehead.

"You promise me, that if it comes down to it, where you have to choose them or me, you choose them."

His body stiffens slightly, his stroking of her back halting. "Kate?"

"I can't lose another child again, Dutchy. You... you choose them. Promise. It's... I just need to know. Like insurance or something. I need you to promise."

"Kate."

" _Promise._  It's the only way I can get through this." There's a silence. A silence that seems to extend beyond actual time. And then he nods, jaw set.

"Okay, fine. I promise. But... we've got other things to worry about." From her position, Kate misses the way his fingers uncross behind her back and resume the circles he was tracing on her. "Getting married. Are you... do you want to just... do it?" Kate opens her mouth, but Dutchy continues. "I mean, I know what you're going to say. That it's not that simple. Except, it sort of is, when you think of it. We go down to the courthouse with a marriage certificate. Done. Getting married is simple. But weddings are... well, they take a bit more planning. And I know we said 2020 but... we can have a proper wedding still. We just... rush things a little."

"A little?" Kate scoffs.

"So, what, we've got until April when my contract runs out so... by March, say, we'd need to do it. That gives us a good three months to get organised."

"And what, a venue, cake, flowers, dress?"

"What about Mum and Dad's?" Dutchy shrugs. "You said it yourself, it's beautiful there. And it's big enough to have family and friends."

Kate finds herself considering it. It really is a beautiful place. And... "But this is crazy."

Dutchy lets out a dry laugh. "Our whole life is crazy. And it's going to get crazier, with two little clones running about the place, and now your bloody sister has me paranoid I'm going to swap them accidentally, so I'm totally buying kidsafe nail polish or  _something_." This last comment does the trick, and she laughs. "I don't care if, when or where I marry you. I just want to. But I know that we  _can_ do this."

Kate bites her lip. "March it is, then." She smiles. "We better do some planning."


	25. Chapter 25

"Are you always this manic at work?" Mackenzie puzzles drily as Kate frantically searches her desk for a reference text, scattering papers and pens and knocking over a stapler. Mackenzie, seated next to her, just manages to move her foot in time to avoid it being speared by a pair of scissors sent crashing to the ground. "Geez, Sis!"

"I am this manic when I'm only allowed two scoops of coffee a day and my brain has turned to mush." Kate manages to locate her text, and then scans her desk once more. "Now, where did I put that report I was marking?" She mutters to herself. Mackenzie rolls her eyes and returns the scissors to the desk. "One more coffee shouldn't make  _that_ much of a difference, should it?"

"Kate, I saw you put two scoops in your morning coffee and I'm willing to bet you'll have one at lunch too, so as Auntie I'm saying no." Kate pouts, much in the way that Mackenzie has often imagined her children will, and Zee lets out a chuckle.

"Don't you have something useful to be doing?"

"Eh. School isn't back til next week and I've got artists block." She turns the sketchbook around so that Kate can see the picture she's halfway through. Kate, flapping her hands wildly at her desk, throwing items of stationary in the air.

"Hilarious." Kate deadpans.

Mackenzie gestures to her foot. "I've almost lost my feet twice. What do you even use scissors for here? Can't imagine there's much cutting and pasting in the Navy." Kate doesn't answer, instead kneading her knuckles into her temple before turning back to her report, all her resources finally located. Mackenzie turns idly back to her paper and turns to a new page, drawing vaguely.

The two sit in silence for another hour or so, aside from the calls Kate takes on her phone. Mackenzie listens with a sort of detached awe, marvelling at the way her sister is able to command authority and solve complex issues over the phone, and yet not knowing enough about the topics being discussed to understand how difficult it is.

The clock has just ticked over to eleven-thirty (Mackenzie still profusely refuses to call it 1130 hours) when a knock at the door makes them both look up. Maxine White is standing in the doorway, her arms full of stacks of files. "Got some more for you, I'm afraid." She smiles apologetically, depositing the papers on Kate's desk. "I'll be glad when this review is over."

"You're not the only one." Kate yawns widely, staring longingly at her empty coffee mug. Catching her gaze, Maxine gives a soft smile.

"I was just about to grab a cuppa." She leans towards the mug and collects it from the desk. "I'll make you one. Mackenzie?"

"Actually, I'm all good. But thanks, Ma'am." Kate takes the mug back and sets it on the desk with a pained expression, as if she'd just been forced to crash the  _Hammersley_ into a reef or something similar.

Maxine blinks, halfway between shock and amusement. "Should I be calling triple zero?" She quips. "Kate McGregor refusing coffee? Are you ill?"

"Uh..." Kate hesitates for a moment, then curses under her breath. "Actually, can you close the door for a second, Ma'am?" Maxine obliges, looking utterly perplexed. Kate turned her chair around so that she was facing Maxine and drew in a deep, shuddering breath. "I just thought that as my friend, I'd like to tell you to save the date. March 16th, provided a certain someone can make sure  _Hammersley_  is in port? I'm actually marrying Petty Officer Mulholland, and it's kind of hard to just wing it. I'm not sure whether you knew we were together." Maxine's lips twitch just a little, and she gives a dignified nod. Kate continues, "I'm aware it's a little soon, but we wanted to get married before I give birth. So actually, Ma'am, would I be able to put in for maternity leave too?"

Maxine looks gobsmacked for a moment, then her face breaks into a smile. "Well, Lieutenant Commander, I'll get those papers to you. Although it will be a terrible loss for the Navy. Though knowing you, I'm sure you'll be back before we know it with a baby carrier. As a friend Kate," Her smile widens. "Geez, Kate, you bloody don't do things by half."

"Well, there's more." Mackenzie mutters under her breath in a sing-song sort of voice, earning a glare from Kate and another sharp intake of breath from Maxine.

"How can there be more?" She frowns. "Unless you're having... triplets or something." Mackenzie lets out a dry laugh, and Maxine almost chokes. "No way."

"Just twins." Kate smirks. "Identical."

" _Just?_ " Maxine repeats, agape. Mackenzie raises her hand, not looking up from her sketchpad.

"Although I would like to add that there are many cases of triplets being incorrectly identified as twins on ultrasounds because of the way they're positioned." Mackenzie chimes in. Both Kate and Maxine turn to her, the first in alarm and the second in amusement. "Hey, just saying. You're not the only one that's been doing research."

"I don't think I'd fit three cots into the study." Kate shakes her head, then her eyes bug out. "And can you imagine  _three_ little humans as stubborn as Dutchy and I?"

"God help us all." Maxine laughs. "I think twins is enough." Then her gaze softens. "Congratulations, Kate. I really mean that. And please pass that on to Dylan too. And I'll do everything in my power to have  _Hammersley_ in port on March 16th." She sniffs for a moment. "Bummer about the coffee though. Mostly the reason Ryan's an only child." She turns to leave, but Kate calls back.

"Oh, and Ma'am," Maxine turns back. "We're ordering pizza and watching Baby Mama tonight, if you're interested. 1900 hours."

Maxine's smile widens and she nods at them both. "Well, how very appropriate." She grins. "And I'll be there."

* * *

"Now you've got me paranoid about triplets." Kate mutters darkly as she comes downstairs, her hair still wet from her shower, but cooling her down all the same. Now that she is at home, she's wearing a long, flowy skirt and a plain black singlet that seems to emphasise her growing stomach. At this time, they haven't told anyone, except for Mackenzie and now Maxine, wanting to wait until their next scan, after which they're planning on driving up to tell Dutchy's family, provided the Navy's sense of timing improves.

"Well aren't you looking very pregnant." Mackenzie observes with a grin. "How  _are_ all three of them?"

"You're grounded." Kate deadpans. "And look what I found." She holds up three DVDs,  _The Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink_ and  _Sixteen Candles. "_ Got to start your education somewhere." She muses. "I still can't believe you hadn't heard of her. Mind you, D- Mum was never really a fan of any of them.  _Dirty Dancing,_ now  _that_ she made me watch a million times."

"Urgh. Me too!" Mackenzie nods. "I mean, it's an okay movie, but once you've seen it over and over again..." She sucks in a weary breath. "Um, so what do I call your boss? Commander? Ma'am? Your Highness?"

"I'm pretty sure you could just call her Maxine." Kate muses drily, feeding one of the DVDs into the machine and muting the TV as anti-piracy warnings begin.

"But isn't it weird having her here?"

"Because she's the mother of my ex's child, you mean?" Kate frowns.

" _What?!_ " Mackenzie explodes. "She's...  _what?_! I meant because she's your boss. She..."

"Oh. Well, yeah they've got a twenty-one year old son. But... look, we've had our difficulties in the past but, no I like her." Kate opens up her computer and logs into a pizza store's site. "Why? Don't you?"

"No, she seems nice enough. I just... part of the Navy seems so stiff and formal and then the next minute you're... dressing up as fairies and dinosaurs and drinking together."

Kate snorts with laughter. "It is a strange life." She agrees, just as a knock sounds at the door. "Look, please don't mention anything about her son, okay?"

"I won't. If you like her, then that's fine." Still, Kate peers at her sister, and Mackenzie rolls her eyes. "Really! Now, are you going to let her in or just leave her out in the squillion degree heat?"

Kate wonders idly if rolling your eyes is a McGregor trait, and then whether one day her twins will be doing the same to her. Fighting back a mad desire to laugh, Kate pulls the door open to reveal Maxine, looking very different with her hair out and straight, in a pair of shorts and a loose t-shirt. "Hi." Maxine holds up a box of chocolates and a tube of Pringles. "I would have brought wine but... under the circumstances. And judging from your desk at work, you enjoy these so..."

"Good choice." Kate smiles, stepping aside so Maxine can come in. "I was just ordering pizza. What do you normally have?"

"Oh, whatever you guys want. Hi, Mackenzie." She adds, catching sight of the teenager, who waves.

Kate grins. "Listen, Mackenzie and I will probably put away a whole pizza each so seriously, what's your favourite?" Grinning, Maxine moves to consult the menu for a second before choosing a supreme pizza. Kate adds it to the order and sends it off, adding to Zee. "It reckons about half an hour. And there's heaps of wine in that cupboard there, so if you want a bottle, go for it. Otherwise there's juice, tea, coffee and I think there's some cola in the fridge."

There's a mewl, and Malin jumps out suddenly at Maxine, headbutting her in the ankle. She flinches in fright, before gesturing at the cat. Mackenzie barely fights back her laughter. "I swear, he only does that to you." Zee leans forward and scoops up the cat, turning him around so that he's facing her. "Naughty Malin."

The three of them make their way to the lounge, Mackenzie diving for a beanbag. Maxine hesitates for a moment, dithering between an armchair and the lounge, as though unsure of which one Kate wants to sit in, before eventually taking the armchair. Kate scoops up the remote and moves towards the lounge, one hand absentmindedly cradling her belly.

Maxine consults the title menu of the DVD on the TV. "I thought you said you were watching  _Baby Mama._ " She muses, as Kate unmutes the TV and  _Sixteen Candles_ begins to play.

"We were." Kate agrees, reaching behind her to dim the lamp. "However, I've just discovered Mackenzie doesn't know who Molly Ringwald is, so that seemed like-"

"Yeah, emergency." Maxine agrees with a smile. "Gotta teach your sister  _some_ important life lessons."

"Exactly."

"Hmm, especially as you're living in sin with your tattooed boyfriend and now knocked up with twins." Mackenzie observes, ticking each 'crime' off on a finger.

"You cheapen it." Kate agrees, tipping her head in thought. "But essentially, yes."

By the time pizza has arrived, Mackenzie is more than invested in the movie, and Kate leaves the movie playing as she opens each box. "Meat lovers for Zee..." She murmurs, passing the box to her sister. "Vegetarian is mine so... supreme for you. I can grab a plate and cutlery if-"

"Hey, this is how I ate my pizza in the academy and it's how I'll eat it now." Maxine chuckles, resting the box on her lap with a well-practised ease.

"You used to order contraband pizza too?" Kate laughs incredulously, remembering how she used to sneak in food deliveries occasionally to reward herself for a hard week.

"Yeah, hanging around the gates and swooping in and out like a ninja." Maxine reminisces. "And running back to my dorm with it hidden behind my back like a cartoon villain."

"Ah, those were the days. Between that morning porridge and the 4.30am PT..."

* * *

In the end, they get through  _Sixteen Candles_ and  _The Breakfast Club._ Mackenzie would have continued watching  _Pretty In Pink,_ but as it was past 2200 hours, both Kate and Maxine agreed that it was time to call it a night. Kate walks her out, feeling exceptionally full and sleepy with a belly full of pizza, pringles and chocolate. "Well, thank you for inviting me." Maxine begins. "It was nice to... to have a friend."

"You're welcome any time." Kate reinforces, rubbing her stomach again, a move that doesn't go unnoticed by Maxine.

"Bet he was rapt when you found out." Maxine muses, nodding at her stomach.

Kate's smile widens at the memory. "Yeah, over the moon. And then when we found out it was twins he reckoned we outta buy a lottery ticket, we were that lucky."

"How'd his family take it? First grandchild?"

"Ah, technically first grandchild, but his grandmother is a twin and all her kids and grandkids hang out and his mother has a whole bunch of siblings so they're not short on kids in that household on holidays." Kate remembers Cleo and wonders vaguely whether she's too young to be a flower girl. "Actually, aside from Zee and Dutchy obviously, you're... you're the first one we've told."

Maxine opens her mouth, croaks and closes it again. Then she says, "Well, I'm... I'm honoured."

"We're telling his parents on Thursday afternoon hopefully, Navy timing going to plan." Kate crosses her fingers. "P... provided I can still take the half-day? We haven't seen them since Christmas and he wanted to tell them in person they're having grandsons, even though we won't find out for a few more weeks and I still reckon they're girls."

Maxine casts an appraising eye over Kate's stomach for a moment, before nodding. "Girls." She agrees.

"How can you tell?"

"I don't know." Maxine's nose crinkles. "Just always been able to, I guess. Knew I was having a boy from the moment my stomach started to grow. So, they're identical then?"

"Yep. Monochorionic Diamniotic is the official term. Things like 'mono-di' are becoming part of my everyday vocabulary. Basically, same placenta, different amniotic sac." She catches sight of Maxine. "Sorry. That was more info than you needed."

"Just wait til you have them. You'll be telling complete strangers in the supermarket exactly what was in their nappy."

Kate pulls a face, but recovers quickly. "As long as they're healthy, I really don't care. That's all I'm worried about." Kate draws in a huge breath and shrugs.

"You're going to be fine, Kate." Maxine assures her, before lowering her voice. "And I'm always right about that, too."

* * *

"I just... I don't know. It's not right." Kate swished slightly, peering critically at her reflection. "I feel like one of those cakes with the barbie doll sticking out the top." She tugs up the top of the dress just a little. "It's too... white?"

"Well, traditionally wedding dresses are white." Mackenzie observes, standing up to move right behind Kate. "But yes, I agree with you. It is... it's kind of a lot." Kate sighs so heavily that her hair flies back from her face, then turns back to the changing rooms. Mackenzie moves to the door, looking at her phone. "So what are you thinking then?"

"I don't know." Kate's reply, slightly muffled from the other side of the curtain calls back. "But I know this is the third weekend we've spent looking at wedding dresses and none of them are right. And I feel bad I've taken up most of your school holidays with this." There's the swishing of fabric, and a light  _oof_ from Kate. "I just want something more... casual, you know? I mean, if we're getting married at Dutchy's parents outside then I don't want to be dragging twenty kilos of silk with me, you know?"

"What about something like these?" Mackenzie holds her phone through the curtain and, a second later, she feels Kate take it.

"Yes!" Kate squeals, pulling back the curtain carefully do that only her head pokes through. "This is what... what did you even search?"

"Boho maternity wedding dress." Mackenzie shrugs.

Kate disappears from view once more. "Well, despite the fact I wouldn't exactly describe myself as  _boho,_ I love these. Trouble is, where do I get them from?"

"Online?" Mackenzie barely suppresses a wince as a woman walks past her, modelling a wedding dress that looks like a melting icecream. "I mean, I know that sounds a bit risky, but I guess if you bought one, you could sew it later on to fit."

"Does it look like I know how to sew?" Kate reemerges, back in her flowy dress and holding the wedding dress on a hanger. In an instant an assistant dashes over, snatching the dress as if it's some sort of precious jewel.

"You should have called for help." She starts to examine the dress, as though searching for the spot where Kate has inevitably dropped him or ripped it. When the assistant has given a grudging nod, they leave the shop, giggling.

"She glared at you like a librarian." Zee hisses.

"I thought she was going to make me buy it just for having the audacity to undress myself." They fall into step along the footpath, neither of them heading in any real direction.

"You can't sew at all?" Mackenzie brings the subject of dresses back.

Kate shakes her head. "I mean, I can disassemble and reassemble an EF88 Austeyr with my eyes shut but  _sewing?!_ Home economics was the only class I ever failed."

"Well, you could visit a tailor then. There's probably heaps of those in Cairns." Mackenzie claps her hands, as if she's a business woman moving on to the next agenda. "What else do we need to get done? Have you found a celebrant?"

"Yes, actually. Name's Olive. She seems nice."

"Flowers?"

"Eh. Still to figure out. All flowers are making me sneeze at the moment." Kate pulls a face. "Actually, everything's making me sneeze at the moment. Or feel sick. I never really bought into that whole 'heightened sense of smell' thing until now. But their gardens are so nice I should really only have to worry about bouquets if I want them and... I don't know, maybe I'll carry a whole lot of combat boots or something."

Mackenzie looks over in alarm, then glowers when she sees Kate chuckle. "Very funny." They pause at an intersection, waiting for the pedestrian light. "Music?" Mackenzie and Kate catch each other's eye.

"The only song Dutchy and I can agree on is  _Bad Moon Rising_ and that doesn't seem a particularly good omen." The light turns green and they begin to walk, Mackenzie giving a sort of skip up onto the footpath once more, reminding Kate that she is still a child.

Mackenzie nods. "Probably true. Well, you'll have to sort that one out with him. Bridesmaids?" Kate blinks and turns to her, confused. "You know... the woman that stands by your side and-"

"Yeah, I know what it is." Kate interjects. "What I don't get is why you're asking. I asked you, Zee."

Mackenzie stops in the middle of the footpath, causing several grumbling pedestrians to walk around her. Kate reaches out and steers her to one side so that everyone can pass. "No you didn't!"

Now it's Kate's turn to look puzzled. "Well... well, I meant to." She turns her gaze to her belly. "You two need to stop making me forget stuff."

Mackenzie can't hold in the laugh at Kate and her  _Mum_ face. "Yeah, right, blame the children. So," Mackenzie twists her body expectantly towards Kate. "You going to actually ask me to be your bridesmaid?"

"You want me to get down on one knee, 'cos I'd probably get stuck." She rolls her eyes as Mackenzie continues to stare and adopts a simpering, sugary sweet tone. "Please, my darling dear baby sister. Would you be my maid of honour?"

Zee gives a curtsy. "Why thank you for asking, Kate. I accept."

"You're a smart arse." Kate mutters darkly, as they fall into step once more.

"Must run in the family." Mackenzie quips.

"There!" Kate interrupts, pointing several shops down with such determination and wonder in her eyes it might just be a lake of water in the middle of the desert. Mackenzie follows her gaze, frowning.

"A dress?" Looking around, puzzled, Mackenzie notes that there are no dress shops about, rather just cafes and souvenir shops.

"No." Kate points again, and this time Mackenzie catches sight of the bakery Kate is pointing at. "In here. I'm starving!"

"We literally just had breakfast!" Mackenzie calls after her, but Kate has already dashed inside and made a beeline directly for an apple and walnut scroll. While Mackenzie hovers outside, clicking her tongue, Kate pays and starts to eat with almost indecent enthusiasm. "What?" She says through a mouthful of food. "I thought you said you didn't want anything."

"You are nothing like I would have expected you to be." Mackenzie muses as, once again they head down the street.

"Well, how did you expect me to be?" Kate is suddenly curious.

"I don't know. I read all about you online. Medals and the Sword at ADFA. I just pictured you to be... more closed off I guess. And a huge nerd."

Kate shrugs, finding the assumption is not nearly as insulting as it could have been. "Well, if you'd shown up five years ago, you'd have been spot on the money. But the  _Hammersley_ kind of softened me up." For a moment Kate finds herself dwelling on a life in which she  _hadn't_ stuck on  _Hammersley._ Would she have reached Chief of Navy? Or love? Kids?

Mackenzie's tentative voice interrupts. "If you'd have been in my situation finding out you had a sister, what would you have wanted?"

The question is a tricky one for Kate, who wonders whether she would have been brave enough to do what Mackenzie had done in the first place. "I don't know." Kate shrugs. "She would have drunk coffee, and definitely stayed out of my shoes." Mackenzie shuffles her feet awkwardly. "But aside from that, I'd say I got the sister I wanted. Kind and thoughtful. Beautiful. Wise. And a hell of a good cook."


	26. Chapter 26

_**From:** Dylan_

_**Subject:**  Fire-don't-work_

_Sorry, got delayed for 24 hrs. Stupid yachty thought the deck of his ship would be a great place to let off leftover fireworks. Detoured to rescue him. Will probably miss the scan. Sorry - save me a picture and I'll see you and Zee soon_

_Love Dylan_

* * *

Kate clicks her tongue at the email, not mad at Dutchy by any means, but frustrated at the Navy's poor sense of timing nonetheless. She knows that Dutchy would move heaven and earth to be here if he could, but they both knew how demanding the job was, and Kate holds no hard feelings towards her fiancee.

Even so, it is with a slightly diminished attitude that Kate traipses back to the obstetrician alone. Despite feeling glum at her solitude, she can't deny she's excited to see her babies again, and so settles down in the waiting room with good grace. When Doctor Nadir greets her, Kate smiles back warmly and settles herself into the chair, ready for another scan and more tests. Dutifully, she shares all the symptoms she's felt over the last fortnight; nosebleeds, nausea and a great craving of peanut butter (eaten straight from the jar by the spoonful, much to Mackenzie's horror.)

When she emerges half an hour later, it's to a clutched picture of her little babies and a smile she can't wipe off her face, even with the added stress of having had her multiple marker screening and amnio tests done as well. She can't stop marvelling at the fact that there are babies,  _her_ babies, growing inside of her. Of course, she's no stranger to the way babies are made, but now, with them actually in her, it seems like a complete miracle.

She makes her meandering way back to the office, with no point taking her half-day now that she and Dutchy aren't going to see his parents, and drops her keys on the desktop. She tucks the photo safely in her desk drawer and glances at the calendar, remembering with a smile that they have just over five months now until their babies are born.  _Soon, guys, soon._

She closes her eyes, just for a moment, and imagines actually  _holding_ them, talking and smiling to them. Hearing them babble and cry. To even be able to touch them seems like the best reward for this nine months, and Kate feels her smile widen. But as she opens her eyes once more, her gaze catches something else, and she feels her stomach flop pathetically. "Shit." She mutters aloud. "Shit, shit!"

On February 14th, in neat, block letters are the words  _Mackenzie's Birthday._

* * *

That afternoon as Mackenzie traipses back in, schoolbag slung over one shoulder, her usual flopping into the chair in the corner of Kate's office is accompanied by a theatrical sigh, in itself worthy of an Oscar. Kate looks up from her typing, swivelling her desk chair around. "What's up?"

"Just a long day." Mackenzie picks up a piece of paper from the recycling bin and begins to fold it into an accordion fan. "I think my brain is still on holidays." Her words are punctuated by a huge yawn. "Can't wait for the weekend." She peers around. "When does Dutchy get back in now?"

"About midday tomorrow apparently. But that could change." Kate shrugs, knowing there's nothing she can do about it. "Are you right to hang around here for... maybe another half-hour? I just have to finish this report."

"No problem." There's a soft popping of joints as Mackenzie stretches up to the sky, before she returns to her normal stature and begins to fan herself with her homemade paper-craft creation. "How are my gorgeous nieces today?" Kate raises an eyebrow at her. "What? 'How are my gorgeous nieces or nephews' is too long. I'll just swap the gender 'round each time." Kate gives a smirk at Mackenzie's reasoning and opens her drawer, passing the photo she'd gotten from the obstetrician. "Awwww!" One of Mackenzie's fingers brush against a tiny face. "And... and they're healthy? No problems?"

"None at all." Kate smiles. "Had a few tests though so I'll find them out next fortnight. I've gotta say though, this whole fortnightly ultrasound shtick is hell on my bladder. You know how much water I have to drink for them?" With a small shudder, she turns back to her work, knowing that the sooner she gets it done, the sooner they can get home. With fingers slamming against her keys, she knocks it over in 25 minutes and pulls her sister to her feet, ready to go.

The two of them fall into step, Kate's shoes squeaking against the polished concrete of the car park, and all the while Kate can't knock back the frantic thoughts in her head as she tries desperately to think of something they can do for Zee's birthday. After all, it is the first one she's had since staying with Kate and she feels the desperate need to make sure it's as happy an occasion can be.

Would she like to have some friends around, maybe? Or would she rather just go to the movies with some friends? Or bowling? Or to the beach? There's no point in asking what she herself would have wanted to do for her birthday - back then, Kate was lucky if Debbie remembered to wish her a  _happy birthday,_ let alone plan her a party. The worst by far had been Kate's thirteenth though when Debbie, in between boyfriends, had decided her young girl was becoming a woman and had decided it was time to have 'the talk', complete with detailed recounts of Debbie's own sexual forays and musings about how Kate's father had been ' _about as adventurous in bed as a dead cockroach_.'

"Kate?" Mackenzie's voice jolts Kate out of her thoughts. Evidently her musings had not gone unnoticed, as she'd apparently been in such a trance she hadn't noticed they'd walked right up to the car. Hurriedly, Kate fumbles for her keys and unlocks the vehicle, but Mackenzie's concerned look is still afixed to her face as she clambers into the front seat. "You okay? You seem a little spaced."

"I'm alright." Kate says, not entirely truthfully, making to key the car. Then she stops abruptly, and twists around to better face her sister. "If you wanted to have friends over, you could, you know? It's... it's just as much your house as mine."

"I know." Mackenzie gives a light shrug. "Is that what you've been worrying about? Me not inviting friends back?"

"No. Not... not exactly. I was..." Kate hesitates. "Well, I was wondering more about your birthday, actually. Whether you would like a party or... or to have some friends over for dinner. Of course, you'd probably have to cook it because I've been banned from my own kitchen but-"

"No." Mackenzie shakes her head, and there's something forced in the smile she flashes Kate. "I... I don't really care about my birthday, actually. I don't need anything."

"But..." Kate reaches over, brushing her hand against Mackenzie's arm. "It's okay if you want a party. You're going to be fourteen."

"Yeah, and then I'll be fifteen, and sixteen and seventeen and eighteen and the whole cycle will go on and on." Mackenzie tugs her seatbelt on with more force than is strictly necessary. "There's nothing special about fourteen and there's no point having a party I don't want to have. So just... just ignore it, okay?"

* * *

"I can't believe I forgot it was her birthday coming up!" Kate curses, one hand on her stomach as she follows Dutchy into the pub. Mackenzie was at her friend Willow's house for a movie night, and Kate was to pick her up on the way back. Mackenzie had been her normal, mostly cheery self, and Kate had not brought up birthdays with her again. However, she had brought it up to Dutchy the moment he'd arrived home, and they'd resumed the conversation in the car on the way here. "What with everything going on..."

"I'd forgotten too." Dutchy admits guiltily. "But it's not like we've missed it. We can still do something nice. Or... I mean, I'll probably be on patrol but we can do something before then. I can ring Mum and we can do something for her tomorrow? I mean, I've got her something on the ship I bought for Christmas that didn't get there in time. I can give that to her and we'll get her something else for her actual birthday. Then at least she can have a little celebration without it being too much pressure."

"You want to celebrate tomorrow for her birthday a fortnight away?"

Dutchy shrugs in a  _what can you do_ sort of fashion. "This next patrol is probably going to be a long one, judging by the end of the rainy season and the way things have gone in the past. FFVs will probably pick up in frequency." Kate chews on the inside of her mouth, knowing this will probably be the case.

"She says she doesn't want to do anything." She begins hesitantly.

"Well, that's not that odd, is it? I mean, it's her first birthday since she lost her mother." Dutchy snakes a hand around her waist absentmindedly. "Maybe... maybe a quiet birthday wouldn't be too-"

"Dutchy!" There's a cry from 2Dads, closely followed by a cheer, and then another cry of, "X-Boss!" Kate can't decide whether he's saying 'X-Boss' or 'Ex-Boss' but decides either is appropriate, and waves a hand.

"You guys  _can_ call me Kate now, you know?" She points out as she and Dutchy arrive at the bar where they're all cloistered. Judging by the state of them all, and the few sea bags clustered underneath chairs, most have been here since  _Hammersley_ docked at 1400 hours, and it's with slightly crossed eyes that many greet her.

"Yeah." 2Dads crinkles his nose, as though she's just told him he can watch her cut her toenails. "But it's like me calling my mum by her first name."

"Are you comparing me to your Mum, 2Dads?" Kate challenges, taking a step forward, and she's glad that, even in civvies and her hair out, she can still make 2Dads gulp and take a step backwards.

2Dads turns from between his drink back to Kate, then shakes his head. "I've had too much to drink to answer that without getting punched,  _Ma'am_. Drink?" He makes to turn back to the bar, but Kate grabs a hold of his forearm, holding him back.

"Actually, can you all come here for a second?" Kate beckons them all closer, doing a quick look around to ensure that the entire crew is there, or at least the crew she'd served with, before wrapping an arm around Dutchy. "We just wanted to let you know that in July I'm going to be going into hospital."

The group falls silent, and Dutchy adopts a sombre look. For a full ten seconds there's silence from the group, and then 2Dads mutters, "Is it serious?"

"Well, labour usually is pretty intense, yeah." Dutchy nods soberly. "I mean, I've never been through it but-"

The crew erupts into a storm of cheers and applause so loud that half the pub looks around. "Boy or girl?" Bird gabbles excitedly, as Kate suddenly finds twenty pairs of eyes fixed on her stomach, as though the colour of her shirt will change in answer to Bird's question.

"Well," Dutchy wraps his arms around Kate's waist, his hands looping once more in front of her stomach. "I think the question is  _boys_ or  _girls."_  Several of the more intoxicated crew, Charge and 2Dads alike, frown, and Dutchy adds, _"_ We're having identical twins."

Someone outside the pub would have sworn a bomb went off, so loud was the screams and cheers from the  _Hammersley_ crew as they all rejoiced in the imminent arrival of  _Hammersley_ 's youngest sailors, and 2Dads set about taking bets on the arrival of babies  _Thunder_ and  _Lightning._

* * *

"Well, that's one group down." Kate muses as she follows the navigation system towards the address Mackenzie had sent her. "I though you were all going to get kicked out of the bar, though." She lightly fingers the teddies sitting in her lap. "Though evidently 2Dads thinks we're having girls." Kate winks at her fiancee.

Dutchy scoffs. "Nah, he sunk about $40 into that claw machine and grabbed the first two stuffed toys he could." He grins back at her, one hand drawing lazy circles on her thigh.

"Which both happened to be pink."

"Come on, Kate. Admit it. They're boys."

"Well, you'd better be in port my next ultrasound and we can find out for sure." She quips back, turning right onto a slightly darkened street. "So that I can prove you wrong."

"And what do I get when I win this bet?" He grins, his hand dipping slightly. Kate reaches down and tugs at his wrist, giving him a pointed look.

"How about... winner gets one night of  _whatever they want._ " She glances over to Dutchy and sees that her words have the desired effect as he shivers almost inperceptively. "Deal?"

"D- deal." Kate's pleased to hear the hitch in Dutchy's voice, and flashes him a satisfied smirk as they pull up outside the address Mackenzie had texted. He clears his throat, seeming to recover slightly, and adds, "But I still think  _Thunder_ and  _Lightning_ are boys."

Kate rolls her eyes. "Surely 2Dads' name for them isn't catching on that fast?"

"Hey," Dutchy shrugs, "All the other twin nicknames seem so cliched. At least  _this_ is something meaningful to both of us." He reasons lightly, and Kate can't deny that he has a point. She turns towards the house.

"Is it lame to go and knock or do I text her?"

"Call?" Dutchy suggests, shrugging. Kate obliges, putting the phone to her ear. However the phone rings out, eventually going to voicemail. Shaking her head, Kate heaves herself out of the car. "Want me to come too?" He asks.

Kate tries to hide her wince, throwing a quick glance at the house before turning back to him. "Pregnant sister is probably embarrassing enough. Drunk brother-in-law might be too much. It'll be fine."

"Brother-in-law?" He repeats, leaning out of the passenger window.

"Well... almost." She grins, lowering herself down so that they're face to face, lips centimetres apart. "Once I retrieve my wedding planner. Be right back." She draws away, smiling at Dutchy's muttered  _minx._

She makes her way up the front path and knocks on the door, drawing her cardigan more securely around her waist. Once again, she hadn't bothered with a loose fitting top, as they were now telling people about the pregnancy. However, she didn't want Mackenzie to be embarrassed and stood, arms wrapped around her waist so as not to make the slight swell of her stomach obvious. Just as Kate is beginning to worry, there's a clattering of feet and the door opens to reveal three teenagers, Mackenzie amongst them.

Zee looks incredulously at her, and Kate shifts awkwardly, wondering whether she's officially become that embarrassing relative. She suddenly wishes she  _had_ thought to wear a looser top, and a pair of jeans without bleach stains on the leg. "Kate? I thought you were calling when you got here?" Kate listens carefully, but she hears no trace of an accusation, and she sighs slightly in relief.

"I did." Kate holds up her phone to show the screen log. "You mustn't have heard it. Uh, did you want me to wait in the car or are you ready now?" There's a loud blasting of music, quickly stifled, and all four of them spin around in time to see a sheepish looking Dutchy holding his hand up in apology. "Ignore him." Kate adds, caught between guilt and amusement.

To her relief though, all three teenagers laugh. "He had a good time then at the pub?" Zee quips good-naturedly.

"Yeah, a little too much fun, I think." Kate grins. "But trust me, after a long patrol, drinking is all you want to do sometimes." She turns back to the car. "You want me to drive around the corner or something before he accidentally sets off an airbag or something?"

"Nah, it's all good. I'll be right out. I'll just grab my bag." Mackenzie dashes off, leaving Kate staring at the two other teenagers. There's an awkward pause, and then Kate holds out her hand.

"Well, I'm Kate." She greets.

"Willow." The brunette greets. "And this is Tash." She gestures to a girl with long blonde hair. "Thanks for letting Zee come over." She flashes a genuine smile. "It's so great your family moved here. Your daughter is really sweet."

* * *

Kate has very little time to dwell on the 'daughter' comment, because the very moment she crosses the threshold back home, she erupts into a spectacular nose bleed. "Shit." She curses, scrabbling for the box of tissues and pressing six or seven to her face. "Not again."

"This... has happened before?" Dutchy frowns, looking somewhat concerned even in his slightly tipsy state.

Zee nods, already moving into the kitchen. "Common side effect of pregnancy, especially with twins apparently. I'll grab the icepacks."

* * *

"Round two." Kate muses as they pull along the driveway at Dutchy's parents place. The view isn't any less impressive than the first time she saw it, and Kate can think of no more beautiful place to get married. Already Sofia and Harrison are trundling down to meet them, and Kate catches sight of Gracie and Stella on the front deck, waving at them. "You ready?"

Dutchy gives a grumble that might be something akin to affirmation; he'd spent most of the drive asleep in the passenger seat while Kate and Mackenzie discussed everything from the plot of last night's movie to potential baby names. "Come on." Kate is sure Mackenzie is making her voice extra cheery, purely for Dutchy's sake, and can't withhold the giggle that escapes her.

"Remember this when you're in labour." Dutchy groans. "Remember how unsympathetic you're being-"

"You're comparing six beers to labour?" Kate snorts as they all clamber out of the car, before leaning closer and whispering in his ear. "And I've done a bottle of vodka and then PT at 0430 the next morning, so don't start a competition you can't win." She grabs his hand and the three of them make their way up the hill.

* * *

Once again there is a sumptuous feast, with plates and dishes full of meats and salads, baked potatoes and bread rolls, despite there only being the five of them plus Gracie and Stella. Kate is surprised at the amount of food she manages to eat, even while being pregnant. Even Dutchy seems to recover somewhat after a decent meal, and by dessert he's his usual self, chatting and joking along with the rest.

"I'll clean up, Mum." Dutchy grins, as Sofia begins collecting dirty plates and cutlery. "Seriously, Mum. I insist."

"Well," Sofia falls back into her chair as Dutchy and Mackenzie, at her own insistence, begin to wash up. Stella entertains them all with stories of work, all the terrible customers insisting upon returns for half-used bath bombs and face masks, furious that they won't swap lipglosses and massage bars.

As they're all nursing drinks, an assortment of coffees, teas and water, Stella tugs a gift bag from underneath her chair and passes it to Mackenzie. "Happy Early Birthday, from Gracie and I." She smiles. "It's not much but..."

"Wow!" Mackenzie's eyes widen as she tugs out a large packet of oil pastels. "These are... wow, thank you both." The oil pastels are accompanied by yet another sketchbook, although now that Kate has seen how quickly Mackenzie gets through them, it doesn't seem as excessive, the amount of blank ones in her possession. "Thank you so much."

"And this one's from us." Harrison passes over another gift bag. Inside is a book with a black cover entitled  _The Resurrectionist - The Lost Work of Dr. Spencer Black._ "I know you'd mentioned an interest in mythology last time I saw you and I saw this in a little bookshop. It's part anatomical drawings of various mythical creatures, part biography of a fictional madman. But I just think it's beautiful."

"It is." Mackenzie breathes out in awe as she opens a page at random and Kate, looking over Mackenzie's shoulder, catches sight of the illustrated skeletal system of a Pegasus. "This is... incredible. Thank you both."

Dutchy digs into his pocket and pulls out a small rectangular box with a bow on top, handing it to Mackenzie, who looks up in confusion. "I just also wanted to give you a present now. I know that it's not for another fortnight, but I won't be here so Happy Early Birthday." Mackenzie peers at the present in confusion, then shakes her head.

"You didn't have to get me anything." She mumbles lamely. "None of you did."

"For one of my two favourite sister-in-laws?" He gives a mock sort of bow to Stella, who grins. "It's nothing special, mind. Just something little." Mackenzie opens the small, wrapped box to reveal a fine, delicate silver chain with an elephant pendant on it. As Mackenzie fingers the pendant, he starts to gabble. "Uh, I know an elephant seems a sort of random choice, but there's a..." He trails off as Mackenzie extracts the jewellery card that goes with it, and begins to read aloud.

" _Make a wish and put on your necklace. The elephant is a symbol of strength, intelligence and stability. Wear your necklace as a reminder that you have the power to dream, conquer and thrive. Be brave, choose your path and make it count."_ Mackenzie looks up, tears in her eyes. "Dutchy, this is... it's beautiful. Thanks." She hesitates for a moment, and then stands up and hugs him. Dutchy looks a little taken aback, but then squeezes her tight.

As Mackenzie pulls apart she turns to the room at large and wipes a tear from her eye. "I... uh... I just wanted to say thank you. To all of you. You've all opened your hearts and homes and... and families up to me when you didn't have to. And I can't express how much that means to me. But thank you."

Kate sniffs, willing herself not to cry, and even Sofia clears her throat as though fighting tears too. Dutchy smiles weakly and for a moment they simply stand there, just breathing in this moment. Kate finds herself wishing someone would say something so she doesn't completely go to pieces, and perhaps Dutchy senses this because he breaks the silence and says, "Oh, Mum, could you get my thing from the oven?"

"Thing?" Sofia repeats in confusion, but she pulls herself away from the scene and bustles over to the oven, throwing herself happily into the distraction. Frowning, she opens the oven to reveal...

"A bread roll?" She murmurs lamely, dropping it on the bench. Beside Kate, Stella lets out a squeak.

"What?" Gracie frowns, peering at her partner. Looking around, Stella seems to be the only one of the four who has understood.

"You're gonna need help for this, Buddy." Stella rolls her eyes, standing up and clapping him on the back. "Ah, what kind of roll is it, Sofia?"

"A burger bun?" She supplies. Now it's Gracie's turn to squeak.

Sofia looks between Dutchy, Stella and Gracie in utter confusion. "For heaven's sake, what's with the squeaking?" She turns to her husband. "Harrison, do you understand?"

"Dylan put a bread roll in the oven." Harrison frowns, shrugging. "Beats me. But it's not the weirdest thing he's put in there-" Beside Kate, Gracie gives a snort of laughter, and Kate closes her eyes, knowing Gracie is taking that statement as a euphemism. Kate elbows her lightly in the ribs.

"Mum!" Gracie cries in exasperation, recovering slightly. "What is it?"

"A burger bun!" Sofia replies, apparently just as frustrated as her children.

"And where was it?" Prompts Stella, dragging a hand over her eyes.

"In the oven." Sofia rolls her eyes, and Kate sees that the twins are going to get the eye-rolling gene from both sides. "Is this one of those... mems?" She stammers.

"A meme, Mum, and  _no._ Put it all together."

Sofia frowns. "Why?"

"Just..." Gracie bites her tongue, as though resisting the urge to shout which, Kate reflects, she probably is. "Just do it."

"Fine. Dylan put a burger bun in the oven." She blinks, then turns to Kate, comprehension dawning. "He put a bun in the oven?! No!"

"I don't understand!" Harrison frowns. "Has the whole family gone mad?"

"Should have just gotten them a mug too." Dutchy mutters, patting Kate on the back, before turning back to his father. "Geez, when Gracie came out all she had to do was gather us all in her room and walk out of her closet door and you got it but..." He wraps his arm around Kate. "You know, Dad?  _Bun in the oven_. Kate is pregnant. We're going to have a baby." Now it's Harrison's turn to squeak as Sofia runs towards them. She dithers for a moment, seemingly not sure about whether to hug Kate or Dutchy, but settles herself by flinging an arm around each of them and tugging them in.

Harrison moves to the bun and picks it up in confusion, as though expecting it to confirm or deny the story. Instead, it falls, cut cleanly in two. "What..."

"Uh, is that a good omen?" Stella frowns, gesturing towards the counter top. Gracie turns to Kate as though expecting her to suddenly break in two as well.

"Well, that's the other thing." Dutchy grins, holding up the two halves of the bread roll and then pressing them against Kate's stomach.

"Twins?!" Stella gasps.

"You're kidding." Gracie exclaims, rising from her seat and wrapping Kate in a tight squeeze that Stella soon joins, both of them rubbing her belly as though she's a $2 scratchie.

"No, we're not." He turns up to look at his parents. "We're having twins, Mum."

Sofia tries to speak several times, but seems to be able to find nothing to say. She turns to her husband, but he seems lost for words too. They simply beam.


	27. Chapter 27

" _Almost half a pound in weight, and six inches long, your babies are around the size of mangoes now."_ Mackenzie reads aloud, seated at the kitchen bench with her school laptop. Kate lowers the knife she is holding and glares at her sister over the mango she'd just been about to slice. "Oh. Oops." Mackenzie smiles apologetically. "Hey, you can still eat it!"

"Not now you've just told me my babies are mangoes!" Kate protests, returning the knife to the block and putting the mango back in the fridge, before huffily drawing out a spoon and the peanut butter jar.

"Oh, Kate, that is gross!" Mackenzie groans, closing the tab and turning incredulously to her sister. "And not a good breakfast. Hey, what if I cut up the mango?"

"Oh no, you're not cutting up my babies!" Kate moves to stand in front of the fridge, spoon stuck in her mouth for safe-keeping while her arms spread wide, as though trying to shield someone from a vicious attack. She looks so bizarre standing there that Mackenzie dissolves into hysterical laughter, holding up her hands.

"Okay, okay, you nutjob. I'll... leave the fruit babies. Although I definitely said  _size of_ mangoes." There's a ding from the computer, and Mackenzie glances down. "Ooh, an email from Dutchy." She smiles. "Probably making sure I'm making you eat healthy. Which apparently I'm failing abysmally at. But, you know, I'm just the auntie. Just looking out for the babies' best interests."

Kate makes a chatterbox sign with her hands, before returning to the kitchen, preparing hers and Mackenzie's lunches, and Zee turns to the email.

_._

_Dear Mackenzie,_

_I'm sorry I'm away on your birthday, but I wanted you to know that I am so proud of you and the young woman you are becoming. I know there have been (and probably will be) lots of times when I embarrass you, or snap at you, or push you away, but I want you to know just how much you mean to me. From the moment I met you I knew that you were a fiercely brave, loyal, kind, smart and beautiful young girl, and you have only grown from there. So much responsibility has been put on your shoulders, and you have risen above it every time. The way that you are continually striving to help those around you is a credit to you, and I could not be more proud._

_You have been there for Kate and our babies when I couldn't, and kept her safe, and for that I could not be more grateful. You are a constant source of joy, light, love and laughter in our lives, and I thank you for welcoming me so readily into your home. Mackenzie, I wish you nothing but the best in life for you. In my eyes (and Kate's too) you are just as much my family as Kate and the children are, and our kids are so very blessed to be able to grow up having such a person as you in their lives as a constant source of inspiration, love and support._

_I know that there is no replacing the family that you have lost, but I hope you feel every bit as part of the family as we feel you are, and every day I count myself blessed to have the privilege of knowing you. Happiest of birthdays my darling girl, and I look forward to seeing you when I return to port._

_Love always, Dylan_

_._

Mackenzie blinks the tears from her eyes, staring at Dutchy's message. "You okay?" Kate prompts, peering at Mackenzie with a look of concern. "Do I need to go and yell at him on the phone?" Kate's hand is already creeping towards her mobile.

"No, I'm... I'm fine." Mackenzie nods, even as tears splash down her face. "Yeah, I'm good. I'm... I'm really good." She sniffs, clearing her throat and giving a shaky laugh. "You've got a good guy, Kate."

Kate nods serenely, abandoning the phone in favour of rubbing her belly. "Yeah, I do." Mackenzie's noticed she's doing that more often now, a purely instinctive move to protect her unborn children, and Mackenzie is struck by just how well Kate and Dylan will parent. Kate opens the grog cupboard and removes something, handing it over to Mackenzie. "Well, here's your present." Mackenzie fingers the badly wrapped present, raising an eyebrow at the penguins wearing santa hats on the paper. "Hey, I never claimed to be the world's best wrapper." Kate defends at the look from her sister.

"That's why you put things in gift bags." Mackenzie teases. "If you hide them in a bag, you don't have to do anything with them."

"Well, they were in my wardrobe and when Dutchy moved in..." Kate throws her hands up. "Anyway, I don't know where they are. It's this, or an  _ALDI_ environmental bag. And I put it up there because you're always going through my clothes so there's no hiding your presents in my wardrobe." She pushes the present forwards and shrugs. Mackenzie chuckles and begins to unwrap the present to reveal a Polaroid camera and several packs of film. "It's not much-" Kate begins.

"Why is that a thing people say when someone unwraps a present. It's awesome. Thank you! And it's orange!" Mackenzie begins to unwrap the box and load film into it with surprising speed.

Even so, Kate calls out, "We need to leave soon. I'll drop you off at school on the way to work."

"Yeah, yeah. Come here!" Mackenzie holds the camera out so that it's facing both of them. "Say cheese!"

* * *

Mackenzie meets Kate at NAVCOM that afternoon with a gift bag attached to her backpack and a collection of flowers weaved into a braided crown atop her head. When she sees Kate, Mackenzie gives an embarrassed sort of smile and says by way of explanation, "Willow and Tash."

"Ah." Kate nods in understanding, peering at the bag swinging. "And they got you a present?"

"Yeah. I have a box of fairy lights for my room, an  _Eckersley_  voucher and this." She tugs out a giant metal 'M', adorned with flowers and fairy lights. "And they did my hair." She adds as an afterthought. "How was your day?"

"It was good," Kate tips her head to the side, "Aside from Dutchy's Mum emailing me lists of baby names and articles on twins." Kate catches Mackenzie's eye and grins. "It's good, I guess. She's happy. I suppose she could have called me a harpie and sent me packing. I just... I just can only absorb so much information before my head explodes." Kate gestures to the computer. "Anyway, I've just got to finish this report and we'll go. I'm starving."

* * *

"This is the most amazing thing I have ever tasted in my entire life." Kate moans as she bites into her wrap, her eyes closed in wonder and amazement. "Seriously, you want to try some?"

"No, I think I'm good." Mackenzie grins, biting into her own wrap. "And it's chicken schnitzel and salad on a wrap. I swear we've even come here before." She looks around at the high ceilings and the fans trying valiantly to combat the Cairns weather, the lagoon just across the road.

Kate seems to disregard her musings, peering at Mackenzie's plate. "Are you going to eat your beetroot?" At Mackenzie's shake of the head, Kate takes it and begins to put it into her own wrap. "Awesome." She muses. "Awesome."

"So I take it you were hungry." Mackenzie chuckles, as the TV playing music videos changes from  _Havana_ to  _Feels._ Absentmindedly, Mackenzie starts to mouth the words, still listening to her sister.

"They were." Kate gestures towards her stomach. "You know I ate a whole tube of Pringles today. Before lunchtime." She shakes her head. "I had a sandwich for lunch and I swear I scared a junior sailor with the speed of my munching. I know I'm eating like a madwoman but I can't help it." She takes a couple of chips and chews, a contented look on her face.

"Hey, I'm not having a go at you." Mackenzie holds her hands up in surrender. "I can't imagine carrying around two little humans." She tips her head. "It's weird when you think about it, isn't it? The human body? The way things work."

"Yeah, I can't get over I've got two little people in my belly. It's... it's mind boggling." As she speaks, she peers down at her stomach with such a look of pride on her face, Mackenzie smiles.

"Are you scared about... you know..." Mackenzie makes an explosive motion with her hands that makes Kate blink in confusion, "...labour?"

"I... sort of. Not really about the pain exactly. My pain threshold is pretty high. It's more, I'm worried something will go wrong. A lot of twins end up in C-sections because of complications." Kate shrugs. "I don't care how it goes as long as they're healthy. And I'm just hoping Dutchy can be there. I know he'll be gutted if he can't."

"Well, you're definitely showing now, so that's cool. Not much longer now, and then before you know it, they'll be teenagers." Mackenzie's eyes widen. "And I'll be twenty-seven." Her nose crinkles. "Ew!"

"Nah, it works for me. When they're brats, I can ship them off to your house." Kate smirks, tipping her water towards Mackenzie as if in a toast before taking a gulp. "Actually, speaking of house, I'm going to be stuck in meetings all afternoon. So I've got you a key and I'll probably be back about seven-ish? Are you right to get the bus home? I know it's a longer bus ride but-"

"Yeah, no worries." She flashes a sympathetic look towards Kate. "That sucks for you, though."

"Tell me about it." Kate groans. "But one more week and Dutchy should be back and we'll know once and for all what we've got."

* * *

Mackenzie heads inside and drops to the lounge, depositing her bag on the ground next to it and wondering vaguely how bored Kate is in her meeting. Of course, despite being bored, Kate had a remarkable knowledge of defence ethics, and Mackenzie had no doubt that Kate would manage to carry herself well, but it had to be the suckiest way to spend a Friday night. Zee has just lazily picked up the remote, with a vague idea about watching something on Netflix, when the door opens and closes.

"I thought you were in a meeting!" Mackenzie calls out, sitting up and peering at the front door, before her jaw drops open. "Mikaylah!" Mackenzie squeaks in excitement, flinging herself into the girl's arms. "How... what?"

Mikaylah jabs a finger behind her, to the spot where Kate is standing, watching the reunion with a soft smile on her face. "Your sister organised it all. For your birthday. So I've got today off school and I'll fly back Sunday afternoon." She hugs Mackenzie again. "Geez, I've missed you so much."

* * *

The weekend passes in a blur of giggling and chatter from Mackenzie's room that goes on most of the night, but Kate lets them go, deciding they have plenty to catch up on and not wishing to spoil Mackenzie's fun. During the day, Mackenzie takes Mikaylah on a tour around Cairns, both of them spending time at the lagoon and walking around the shops.

For the most part, Kate keeps to herself, waking at the crack of dawn both mornings and heading downstairs to feed the cat and make a hot chocolate (because dammit if she couldn't have caffeine she was at least having sugar.) She eats, dresses, tries and fails to do some yoga, too out of practice and off-balance to manage properly, and spends time clearing some of the junk out from the spare room, before Mackenzie and Mikaylah generally emerge, both rubbing tired eyes and yawning.

On Sunday, they head up to Kuranda for the day, Mackenzie's new Polaroid getting a workout as they wander through the butterfly farm and the market stalls, trying on hats and flowing skirts and jewellery. Kate buys two patchwork zebras from a woman who made them from hand, and Mackenzie and Mikaylah buy matching bracelets before, regretfully, it's time to head towards the airport.

With promises of a more extended trip the next school holidays, Mackenzie and Mikaylah say goodbye at the terminal, waving until they're out of sight. Then Mackenzie wraps Kate in a hug. "Thank you." She whispers, as Kate hugs the girl tighter. "You're the best, Sis."

* * *

The following Saturday sees Kate, Mackenzie and Dutchy anxiously waiting in front of the familiar screen. "Big reveal." Dutchy winces, squeezing Kate's hand. He is still in his DPNUs, having raced straight over from the ship to the hospital, skidding into the room out of breath and red-faced. Recovering somewhat with a glass of water from a nurse concerned he was going to pass out or something, he now has his cocky grin affixed to his face as he smiles at his fiancee. "Sure you don't want to change your bet?"

"Are you sure you don't want to change yours?" Kate counters, raising an eyebrow as she peers at her fiancee. "Maxine reckons they're girls, too."

He shakes his head, a pitying look on his face as if she's suggesting the children are going to be born with wings or something just as ridiculous. "They're boys, Kate. I just know it."

"Girls." She says simply, both of them grinning like idiots.

"Well, you know the stakes." He raises an eyebrow and turns back to the blank screen, hands still rubbing circles on her back.

"Urgh, don't tell me the stakes are weird sex things?" Mackenzie wines from the plastic seat. Kate and Dutchy exchange glances, having almost forgotten she was there. Mackenzie takes their silence for affirmation and rolls her eyes. "Oh, for goodness sake."

Dutchy tries valiantly to retrieve the situation. "No, it's who has to-"

"Lalalala, I'm too young for these lies!" Mackenzie holds her fingers in her ears, cutting him off, just as another voice chimes in. Quickly, Mackenzie returns her hands to her lap.

"So, Kate," Doctor Nadir walks in, shoes squeaking. "How have you been this last fortnight?"

"Yeah, pretty good. Bit of breathlessness but you said that was pretty standard. Not much else to report."

"Rightio." The corners of the doctor's mouth twitch. "Well, you know the drill." She squirts the gel on Kate's belly, who winces just slightly at the cold. For a good twenty seconds the doctor moves the wand around, changing angles. Then, after a while, she begins to speak. "Well, they look to be a good size. You can see here Twin 1's head, some fingers and toes. Twin 2 is here as well. You can see the head, fingers, toes. Both look to be developing well. I can tell you what you're having if-"

"Yes." Kate and Dutchy answer at the same time, before Kate shakes her head, turning to her sister. "Oh, but wait. Zee, what's your vote?"

"No, I'm not getting involved in your weirdness. I vote you're gonna be one of those rare cases of boy/girl identicals. Then at least I'll be half right." Sticking her tongue out at her sister, Zee turns to the doctor. "Please, end this feud. It's been going on since she peed on the stick."

The doctor smiles. "Well, these three lines here..." She points to a section on the ultrasound. "...and here..." She points to them on the second baby, "...mean you've got two daughters in there."

Kate gives a great bark-like laugh turns to Dutchy, and both of them have the exact same awestruck looks. "You're amazing." He whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "You're amazing, Kate."


	28. Chapter 28

"Uh, you okay down there?" Mackenzie stops in the doorway as she catches sight of her sister perched on her office floor, surrounded by papers. For a moment she thinks Kate must have fallen, and the instinct to shout for help fills her, but as Kate looks up, pen in hand and smile on her face, she relaxes.

"My back was hurting." Kate defends, gesturing towards her office chair that has been dragged into a corner. "I got sick of adjusting the chair so I kind of... perched down here. And I've had about six junior sailors run in thinking I'd fallen. It's like you get pregnant and suddenly you're an invalid."

Mackenzie rolls her eyes but says nothing, taking a spot on the carpet next to her and fully prepared for a rant, but none comes. "When's Dutchy back?" Zee asks. "Did you make sure Maxine was still able to have him here?"

"Well, if everything goes to plan, he should be back on the 14th." Kate adds a silent  _please_ in her head. "But Maxine has assured me that she's done everything in her power to make sure. She's got  _Hammersley_ scheduled for maintenance and they'll probably go out again on the 18th." Mackenzie nods her approval of this plan, before turning to Kate, a wide grin on her face.

"You're getting married in just over a week."

"I know!" Kate grins back, signing the end of the report with a flourish. "Actually, I feel remarkably zen about the whole thing. I thought I'd be freaking out but I'm just... happy."

"Lovesick more like it. Look at your goofy smile."

"Hey, you're grinning too." Kate points out, bumping her lightly with a shoulder.  _"And_  you seem to have taken up the role of wedding planner quite well. We wouldn't have been able to do half of this stuff without you."

"Well, on that note," Mackenzie pulls Kate to her feet. "We've got some shopping to do."

"Ugh." Kate grunts as she's dragged to her feet. "What else is there possibly to buy?"

"Uh, ribbon, flower girl basket, and you need to sort out your jewellery. Plus a welcome sign. And a guest book. Plus a cake topper and-" Mackenzie ticks off each one on a finger.

"Okay, okay. So a lot to buy, then." Kate glances at her messy office, makes a half-hearted attempt to straighten some of the papers, and then shrugs and leads the way out of the office. "Let me get changed and I'll be right with you."

* * *

"We're not here to look at baby clothes!" Mackenzie calls out, tugging on Kate's arm and pulling her past the children's section where Kate had been thumbing through onesies. A moment later, however, Mackenzie doubles back. "Are you going to be one of those Mums that dresses your twins identically, because if so, then this is really cute!" Mackenzie tugs a dress from a rack and holds it up. Kate smiles softly at the miniature Hogwarts dress - having watched all eight movies with Mackenzie over the last few weeks - and fingers the matching headband.

"That is really cute." Kate agrees, adding it to the basket dangling from one arm. "And I hate this dilemma of whether to buy one or two of everything. I don't think I'd force them to dress the same, but it's just so freaking cute." She hesitates for a fraction of a second, and then adds an identical dress to her basket. "Urgh, all baby stuff at the moment is just so adorable. I've never been aware of just how many babies there are in Cairns. And there's so many baby things everywhere and they're all so cute-"

"Wedding first." Mackenzie says curtly. "We get you married, and then we do the baby stuff for your soon-to-be unbastard children. Come on! Cleo and Chloe need flower girl baskets!"

"Maybe we should have just done the quickie wedding." Kate sighs in a long-suffering sort of way, before allowing herself to be dragged away.

* * *

"So are you having a hen's night?" Zee frowns as she holds up two different necklaces in Kate's direction.

"No, I don't think so." Kate shakes her head. "I know the crew is taking Dutchy out tomorrow night when they're on shore leave in Gove. Hopefully 2Dads doesn't leave him tied up to a lamp post or something. We might just do a movie marathon tomorrow night or something." Kate crinkles her nose at the necklaces and picks up a third dispassionately. "Maybe I should just wear my dog-tags."

"You are not wearing dog-tags, combat boots or... basically, blanket ban on anything Naval. Okay?"

"You are no fun." Kate pouts, returning another rejected necklace to the shelf. "Shall we keep going? We'll duck into that jewellery shop."

"Yeah, sounds good." Mackenzie barely suppresses a yawn, smiling apologetically at Kate. "Sorry. My tiredness is no reflection of your company, I promise. I-" Kate suddenly stops in the middle of the aisle, and Mackenzie very nearly runs into her. "What?" Zee cries out, looking positively alarmed as Kate held her hands to her stomach. "What's wrong?"

"It's kicking." Kate leans forward and grabs Mackenzie's hand. "Here. Can you feel?" Turning to Zee and positively beaming, Kate rubs a hand against her belly. "That's my girls in there."

* * *

"We are celebrating your last proper night of freedom!" Charge's voice booms over the rest as he leads the way into the busy bar, one hand tugging a fistful of Dutchy's shirt. "Groom-to-be coming through!" They reach the bar and Charge quickly orders a round of guava mojos, dispersing them with ease. "To Dutchy and Kate. We like you both, but she was here first, so look after her or you'll have a bunch of angry sailors after you. May your marriage be everything you wanted. And may her cooking skills improve!"

The cheer that goes up as the  _Hammersley_ crew toast draws the attention of the whole bar. 2Dads downs his drink with ease and grins at Charge. "Let's do this."

* * *

_Heyyyyy beautiful_

_i cant wait to marrrry u_

Kate snorts with laughter at the message. "Looks like Dutchy's enjoying the drinks."

"Yeah, check out facebook. He's been tagged in a few photos there too." Kate catches Mackenzie's eye, and the teenager hastens to add, "All appropriate, I promise. Aww, look at this one."

Mackenzie turns the laptop around so that Kate has a clear picture of Dutchy, a drink in one hand and his phone in the other, turned around so that Kate can see the picture of their latest sonogram on the mobile. Underneath it, 2Dads has written a caption:  ** _bachelor party hes flashing pictures of his unborn kids to random strangers. #gottalovelove #whipped #_** ** _hammersleywedding2019 #babythunder #babylightning_**

At that moment, Kate hears her phone ding again and rolls her eyes at the latest message.

_hey sexy wha_ _t are you wearing? ;D_

"What's he saying now?" Mackenzie enquires curiously. She lifts herself up taller in an effort to see, but Kate turns her phone away.

"Well, nothing appropriate." She mutters as she types a message back.

_Easy, Tiger. Save it for our wedding night x_

* * *

The rest of the night goes by in usual Friday night fashion, with a movie and takeaway, interrupted by the ever pressing messages chiming in at regular intervals from an increasingly drunk Dutchy. They range from drunken declarations of love to increasingly transparent attempts to initiate phone sex, and even once a drunken voice memo of Dutchy proposing before being reminded by an equally drunk sounding 2Dads that they are already getting married.

"Well, Kate, I think he likes you." Mackenzie muses sarcastically as they finish watching  _Clueless_ and throw themselves straight into  _Mean Girls._ Mackenzie has evidently seen the film several times, as she quotes the lines with ease.

"Yeah, it would appear so." Kate agrees as yet another message comes through. "Which I guess is a good thing. Oh, and I think he's trying to quote Shakespeare at me now. But... badly." Kate locks her phone and turns to Zee. "So I have a favour to ask."

"If you are going to ask me to get a jar of peanut butter and a spoon again, I might just vomit." Mackenzie says firmly.

"No, it's not that. Although I could totally go for some peanut butter, now that you mention it. No, it's... well, I have an prenatal class tomorrow and I really don't want to go by myself."

Mackenzie's eyes widen in horror. "No!" She whines. "Oh, no, they show, like, birth videos and stuff. I can't deal with that." She holds up a hand to her face as though there is a live birth video playing in front of her at that very moment.

"Please?" Kate is unable to keep the pleading from her tone.

"I can't!" Zee sounds equally as desperate.

"I can't go by myself."

"But I don't want to-" Mackenzie's phone dings and she rolls her eyes at the latest message. "He's texting me now.  _'i just really love your sister okay'_ It's so sickeningly adorable."

Kate leans over and laughs at the message. "He seems pretty drunk." She nods, the corners of her mouth twitching. "Poor guy's going to have a sore head tomorrow."

* * *

"This is weird. It's... like a party of bellies." Mackenzie muses under her breath as she and Kate take seats towards the back of the class. Kate had made to sit at the front but Mackenzie had shot down that idea. "Do you think if I clap really loudly, one of them will be born?"

"Shh." Kate nudges Mackenzie in the ribs and turns to look around her. She'd thought most of the women would be younger than her, but she's relieved to see that some look to be at least as old as she is, and a few have come without partners.

When everyone is seated, the woman at the front of the class begins to talk, with a voice like a children's presenter. Kate half expects her to start singing  _Incy Wincy Spider._ "Well, thank you all for joining us. I think first we'll start by going around the room and introducing yourself. Nothing too extravegant. Just a few things about who you are and your pregnancy. So I am Helen, mother to four and grandmother to one."

Kate listens politely as, one by one, the women introduce themselves. When it comes to Kate, she smiles in a nervous sort of way. "Uh, I'm Kate, and this is my sister Mackenzie. My partner and I are both Navy, and he's away with work at the moment so couldn't be here today. Um... and I am 22 weeks with identical twins."

* * *

"That was excruciating! And I'm forever traumatised by that video, I'll have you know. Why would anyone shove a camera down there?!" Mackenzie turns to Kate, a look of horror on her face as the two of them traipse down the stairs. "You're not going to film the birth, are you?"

"God, no!" Kate shakes her head profusely. "If anyone approaches me with a camera, I just might kill them." Kate pummels the pedestrian crossing button.

"But that Mum at the front- hippie-Pippi was going on about what a  _majestic_ and  _natural_ experience. Urgh. That was terrifying." The light turns green and the two of them start to walk across the road.

"Could have fried an egg on your face when they were talking about comfortable sex positions for the end of pregnancy." Kate chuckles.

"Yeah, that was information I could have lived without." Mackenzie agrees. "All in all, I'll definitely wait outside while you're giving birth. And Dutchy had better be here because if that support person falls to me, I might need professional help."

Kate grins. "I'll give you a pass for that one."


	29. Chapter 29

"Rise and shine, Katie! It's your wedding day!" Kate's consciousness is thrust upon her as Mackenzie suddenly leaps onto Kate's bed, blasting  _Here Comes the Bride_ on her phone and prodding Kate in the back. "Come on! We've got to get your hair and makeup done, and I've still got to finish decorating your cake. Stella and Gracie are going to be here within the hour so I'll give you five minutes to wake up and then up and at 'em."

"You're a sadist." Kate mumbles into her pillow, yawning and stretching. As Mackenzie grins at her and settles herself primly on the pillow Dutchy normally sleeps on, Kate tugs her phone towards her and sees it's full of notifications.

"I think 2Dads is trying to get ' _Hammersley Wedding_ ' trending." Kate muses as she peers at the twitter thread he'd linked them all to somewhere in amongst the bucks' night. As she scrolls through, she sees that 2Dads is not the only one adding photos now, with photos coming in from many of Kate's crew members and Dutchy's family alike. "Here." Kate passes the phone to Mackenzie so that she can see the collection of pictures.

Smirking, Mackenzie admires the photo of Dutchy seated at his parents' dining table furiously writing. Underneath, is a caption, no doubt written by 2Dads.  ** _rewriting his vows for about the millionth time #dedication #hammersleywedding2019_**

"Aww, he's such a dork." Mackenzie chuckles. She scrolls idly, coming to rest on a picture of Charge, Dutchy and RO seated on the back deck, all clutching beers.  ** _last drink as a free man #hammersleywedding2019_**

"Come here." Mackenzie calls to Kate, shuffling her pillow closer to Kate's and lifting up Kate's phone. "Why should the guys get all the fun? Say cheese!"

"Oh, Zee I just woke up!" Kate protests, but she permits Mackenzie to take a photo all the same, relieved that she at least does it through Snapchat so that a filter of flower crowns and colour adjustments hide her tired complexion. As Mackenzie taps away, Kate closes her eyes for a moment and stretches once more, hearing the popping of joints.

"There we go!" Zee hands the phone back to Kate a minute later, apparently satisfied. "And we're adding more when we're getting ready." Kate rolls her eyes at the caption Mackenzie has added:  ** _just two sisters hammer-slaying it #hammersleywedding2019_**

Kate continues to scroll down the thread, noting that the guys seem to be getting ready as they speak, despite the early hour. "Oh look, Spider's in town. And Chefo too. Wow, that's a bit of a blast from the past." Kate looks up from the photo of the two guys, back to back and holding their hands out like pistols, before she turns to see Mackenzie's curious face. "Oh, I used to serve with them when I first started on  _Hammersley."_ She twists the phone around so that Mackenzie can see the picture and it's caption.  ** _#OGHammersley #youwishyouwerethiscool #hammersleywedding2019_**

A moment later a text comes in on Kate's phone. Glancing down, she expects it to be Dutchy, but smiles with delight as she sees it's Nikki.  _Just docked. Going to be a race to the finish but Bomb's picking me up so hopefully we'll make it in time. - N_

"Gonna be a bit of a  _Hammersley_ reunion." Mackenzie muses, reading the message over Kate's shoulder. "Your line of work sure does love a good party."

"Yeah, I reckon you and I will be the only sober ones at this ceremony." Kate muses drily, absentmindedly running a hand over her belly.

"Come on," Zee pats Kate's shoulder and pulls herself to her feet, bouncing up and down with more energy than Kate feels she's ever possessed in her life. "Let's get you married. Go have a shower and I'll have some breakfast for you when you're out."

* * *

Kate takes her time in the shower. She'd waxed the previous night, but still took the time to shampoo and condition her hair, before rubbing moisturiser onto herself. Feeling slightly more human after this brief luxury, Kate blow-dries her hair and heads downstairs, just in time to see Mackenzie covering what Kate assumes is the wedding cake. "Don't I get to see it?" Kate frowns, taking a step closer to the kitchen and has just laid a hand on the cake cover when Mackenzie slaps her hand away.

"You can see it at the wedding. Now, come on, eat up." She pushes a plate of toast towards Kate, absolutely slathered in peanut butter. "I was going to make you bacon and eggs or something but all you've been eating lately is peanut butter and hey, it's your wedding day."

"You're a legend." Kate whispers, beginning to eat while Mackenzie flits around the house, first moving a mirror and make-up wipes on top of Kate's coffee table, and then bringing down Kate's makeup bag and hair accessories. Zee has just disappeared upstairs once more for who-knows-what when a knock at the door signals the arrival of Gracie and Stella. Kate pushes herself into a standing position, but is stopped almost immediately by Mackenzie's voice.

"I'll get it!" She shouts, dashing down the stairs and jumping the last three, landing catlike on the ground.

"Easy!" Kate shouts at Zee's retreating back. "I'm not spending my wedding in the Emergency Room." Finishing the last of her toast, Kate pushes herself to her feet so that she can greet the new arrivals. Both women are dressed in casual clothes for what apparently seems to be the very serious business of hair and makeup. From what Kate can see, Stella and Gracie have both already completed theirs, Stella's dark hair out and straight, her lips painted the exact crimson of Kate's flowers, and Gracie's long blonde curls have been captured and twisted into a low, loose side braid, her lips a dusky purple.

"Alright, what are we thinking?" Stella asks without preamble, peering critically at Kate and scooping up the end of Kate's hair, holding it experimentally this way and that. "Hair up or down?"

"I don't know." Kate shakes her head. "I'm not good with hair."

Stella nods, her eyes still raking over Kate. But after a moment she nods. "Fine. Leave it to me. Brush your teeth, wash your face, and meet me down here in no more than five minutes."

* * *

An hour later and Kate barely recognises herself, with Stella capturing Kate's hair in a loose, braided chignon with what feels like a hundred bobby pins, so that Kate feels more like a pin-cushion than a bride-to-be. However, when Stella declares herself 'done' and lets Kate examine her reflection, she sees that the hairstyle is so perfectly rustic and yet romantic, and will go perfect with her dress. While Stella had been busy with doing her hair, Gracie had set out doing Kate's makeup. "Nothing too heavy." She'd assured Kate. "Definitely the natural look. But a bit of eyeliner and lippie never went astray. Here. Now, you go get your dress on and we'll start on Mackenzie."

Back in her room, Kate tugs the dress from her wardrobe and lays it out on the bed. It's a simple one, all lace and light, more of a cream than white, with elaborately detailed long sleeves and a soft skirt that falls to her feet. Sofia had done her magic resizing it, and as Kate pulls the dress on she relishes in the way it wraps snugly around her belly. Sliding on her jewellery to go with it, and the garter belt Dutchy had bought her during his drunken bucks night, Kate peers at herself. "You're getting married." She whispers, peering at her reflection.

* * *

By the time she's returned to the living room, Mackenzie is nearly done with her hair and makeup, and Stella is joyfully snapping pictures to add to the twitter feed. Stella and Gracie have, once again, opted for the natural look, but the effect of the small amount of makeup seems only to emphasise Mackenzie's beauty. Zee has changed into her dress, as its high neck require her to pull it over her head. The dress, like Kate's, is simple, and lacy, it's deep crimson bringing out the green in Zee's eyes. It cinches in at the waist, the end of the skirt falling to Zee's knees.

"You look beautiful." Kate exhales, reaching out to touch Mackenzie's face and then, at the last second, thinking better of it and withdrawing her hand, settling instead on a goofy smile. Mackenzie gives a shaky laugh and gestures in Kate's direction.

"Funny." She chuckles, adjusting the hem of her bridesmaid's dress. "I was going to say the same thing about you."

Kate wants to say more, about how Mackenzie being here meant so much to her, and how glad she is that they had the chance to meet. But before she can quite think of words important enough, Gracie interrupts.

"Alright, we're going to head up there. See if Mum needs help setting up the last minute stuff and then help Donna and Sally with the girls." Gracie makes to hug Kate, and then stops. "Just imagine I'm hugging you super tight right now, okay?"

"Yeah, me too." Stella agrees, blowing a red-lipped kiss in their direction. "You look beautiful, Kate. Dyl's not gonna know what's hit him. You be right to leave soon? There's still room with us if you don't want to drive yourself."

"Nah, we're fine. I'll see you up there. And thank you." Kate waves them off, and then returns upstairs, intent on adding perfume and her earrings.

"You right to leave in about ten minutes?" Mackenzie calls out, her voice echoing through the house. Kate has no idea exactly where she is, but from the sounds of her voice deduces that she is downstairs and, sure enough, as she heads back downstairs she sees Zee fingering her Polaroid camera. "We need a picture." Zee affirms, holding the camera up. They take about five before Kate turns to the door.

"I can't just hang around here. I'm so nervous. Are you... are you right if we go now?"

"Yeah, that's fine." Zee scoops up the cake. "I'll throw this in the car, then I'll help you grab the rest of your stuff." She pulls open the door, but after a moment Zee calls out. "Hey Kate? You should come here."

Perplexed, Kate rushes to the door as fast as her shoes and dress will permit, certain she's about to see her car with a flat tyre or blocked in by construction or  _something_ to put a damper on this perfect day. "What is it?" She demands as she reaches the door and peers out at the street beyond. "Charge?" She blinks at the sight of Charge looking uncharacteristically tidy in a neat black suit and standing in front of a neat black jaguar. As she pushes open the front door, Charge takes a few steps closer to her, gesturing to the car behind him.

"Can't have you driving to your own wedding." He says by way of greeting. "And I'm ready to leave whenever you both are." He moves forward to take the cake off Mackenzie, who's smile is filling her whole face. "Anything I can help you lovely ladies with?"

Kate lets out a sound halfway between a gasp and a laugh as she admires the shiny black car. "Where did you get this?"

"It's my brother's." He winks. "Told him I needed it for a special lady's big day. So..." He pulls the passenger door open at the back, as though he's a chauffeur. Kate supposes, upon reflection, that he is. "Are you lovely ladies ready?" He gives an ironic little bow in their direction.

"Two minutes." Kate grins.

* * *

"So how are Thunder and Lightning going?" Charge enquires good-naturedly, peering in the rear-view mirror so that he can catch Kate's eye. "I think 2Dads is angling for Godfather, some of the stuff he's bought them. You should see his cabin. It's an explosion of pink and dresses. If I didn't know him any better, I'd say he's getting clucky."

"Seriously?" Kate laughs, running a hand over her stomach. "Well, they've discovered how to kick apparently. So that's fun. But... no, they're doing well."

Charge lets out a chuckle. "And just you wait 'til Nikki gets her hands on them. Between her, Dutchy and Mackenzie, these girls are going to be the most spoiled little ones in the world. Even RO's getting in on it. I swear, when you have a baby shower,  _Hammersley's_ going to lose about a tonne of weight as everyone offloads their pink, fluffy presents. And you'll never be short on babysitters."

"I feel like I'm going to need them." Kate muses drily, trying not to think about how she's going to be without Dylan for a lot of it. "Were you there when your kids were born?"

"Ah, I got to see Jessica being born. My second. But I was out at sea when my first arrived." He catches Kate's eye once more in the mirror. "Dutchy'll move heaven and earth to be there, you know that. If I was half the parent he is, I'd have been happy. You two are going to be fine." He gestures in a random sort of way. "Thought of any names?" He enquires. Kate exchanges a glance with her sister.

"Ah, nothing any of us can agree on at the moment. A few ideas but nothing that seems to have stuck, you know?"

He cracks a cheeky grin. "Ooh, are they going to rhyme? Evie and Stevie? Jo and Flo?"

"Oh, neither of us are that cruel!" Kate scoffs, shuddering at the mere thought of it.

Charge tips his head in thought. "I don't know, you certainly made Spide scrub out the juniors quite a bit."

"He had it coming." Kate defends herself. "Have you seen him? He's coming today, apparently."

They lapse into a comfortable discussion about what Spider is doing now, and then Bomber and Chefo, for Kate hasn't had the chance to catch up with any of them in recent months. Part of Kate longs the drive to keep going, but the other can't wait to get out and marry the man she loves. At long last, Kate sees the familiar hills, peppered with neat, white chairs and an archway entwined with red flowers. As Kate glances out her window, she catches sight of an ornately written sign.

_Ahoy! Welcome to Dylan Kate's wedding_

_Go starboard!_

_#hammersleywedding2019_

"So, ma'am?" Charge interrupts her silent musings of just who wrote the sign. "Am I revving the engine? Doing a burnout?"

Kate laughs out loud. "I think we'll be good to just arrive."

"Rightio." He digs into his pocket and tugs out a device Kate recognises as one of the ships' Motorola radios. She raises an eyebrow at him, but Charge merely shrugs. "Hey, we'll get them back in no time." He keys the button. "Sierra-2019, this is Bravo-2019. The princess is here. Repeat. The princess is here." Rolling her eyes at the obvious code, Kate exchanges a curious glance with Mackenzie. A moment later, the radio is keyed once more.

" _Oh, oh, that's me!"_ Kate laughs out loud at the excitement in Sofia's voice. " _Uh... transfer princess to the right... ah... starboard garage. Over."_

"Roger. Over." He drops the radio to the chair next to him and starts to drive once more, moving the car towards the large four-car garage and grinning at Kate's sheer confusion with the scenario. "Hey, there's very little phone reception out here." He defends. "Plus, Dutchy's Mum was like a kid with a new toy when I gave her the radio. And it kind of makes me feel like a spy, which is cool." He stops the car in the garage and Kate spots Sofia almost immediately, her smile wider than Kate has ever seen.

She rushes towards the car door and pulls it open, offering a hand to Kate and tearing up. "You look so beautiful. And you," She moves to help Mackenzie from the car. "You look so grown up."

Kate turns to Charge, who has adopted a sombre expression. "Well, Sofia, I'll leave them in your capable hands and I'll head outside to wait with Dutchy and the rest of the blokes."

"Charge, wait!" Kate runs towards him as fast as she can and flings her arms around him. He hesitates for only a moment and then gives her a tight squeeze. When he pulls away, Kate sees him hurriedly wipe a tear away from his eyes. "Thank you."

"You look beautiful." He whispers. "I'll see you out there."

* * *

Sofia leads Kate into one of the spare bedrooms, where Kate is promptly tackled by Chloe and Cleo, both dressed in their red flower girl dresses, their tulle skirts adding volume to the dress. Throughout the course of the morning it seems that Chloe has taken Cleo under her wing, clutching her hand and entertaining her as their hair is threaded with red flowers.

"Is it time yet, Auntie Kate?" Chloe asks eagerly, skipping around the room and twirling her basket around.

"Soon." Kate promises.

"And can you play  _Baby Shark_ for Cleo and me when it's dancing time?" Behind Chloe, Sally drops her head into her hands and mutters something that could be cursing. Kate, not quite sure what  _Baby Shark_ is, nods tentatively.

"Sure." She smiles.

"You've doomed us all, Kate." Sally murmurs, patting Kate on the back.

Mackenzie has brought her Polaroid camera, and they fill in the time snapping pictures of each other - Kate and Mackenzie, Kate and the flower girls, Sally with Chloe, Kate and Sofia - until the radio in Sofia's hand chimes once more with the simple words, " _We're ready."_

The room falls silent as everyone in the room turns to Kate. "Are you?" Mackenzie asks finally.

"Yeah." Kate nods, and she finds it's the truth. "Yeah, I'm ready."

"Well, we'd... we'd better get in there." Sofia murmurs, and with a peck on the cheek she and Sally sweep from the room, leaving Kate and Mackenzie alone with the two girls.

"Let's go." Mackenzie whispers after a minute. "Come on." And exchanging one last smile between the two of them, she leads the way from the room and towards the back deck.

* * *

The wedding is to take place on the lawns beside the large house, the 'aisle' beginning just from the side of the house and ending past it, overlooking the hills and the glorious blue-sky day. Kate readjusts her bouquet of red flowers and turns to Cleo and Chloe.

"Are you guys ready?" Kate asks, crouching down slightly so that she can speak to them more clearly. Cleo nods, and Chloe takes the younger girl's hand, looking very wise for her six-years.

"We've got this, Auntie Kate." Chloe assures her. "We walk along the red carpet like movie stars."

"Yeah, you do." Kate whispers, her voice shaking somewhat.

And as music starts up, Chloe tugs Cleo slightly, and the two of them start to walk.

Kate lets out a loud, shaky breath, and Mackenzie grins at her. "See you on the other side." Zee winks, then, almost as though she can't resist, Mackenzie throws herself into Kate's arms. "Makeup be damned," She whispers. "I'm so happy for you, Sis."

* * *

As Kate's feet find footing along the soft red carpet, she finds her gaze fixed solely on Dylan's beaming face from underneath the archway. As Mackenzie reaches him, she gives him a quick hug, then moves to take Chloe and Cleo's hands, standing respectfully to the side.

And Kate walks past so many people, friends from work and Dutchy's family and row upon row of smiling faces and indiscernible chatter until... "Do you think she's a virgin bride?" Kate hears 2Dads whisper in Spider's ear. Kate rolls her eyes as she passes, turning briefly towards him.

"You'll keep, 2Dads." Kate hisses from between her teeth, unable to keep the smile from her face. "Mark my words, there will be revenge."

2Dads gulps.

She has eyes only for Dutchy as she catches his gaze, and suddenly she's there, standing in front of him, about to marry him, and the current reality of this situation hits her like a bolt of lightning. It's all she can do not to burst into cheery song. Passing her flowers to Mackenzie, who drops Chloe's hand to take them, she takes Dutchy's hands in her own and for a moment, they're lost in each other, until the marriage celebrant, Olive, speaks.

"Who here gives this woman away?" Kate blinks at the question; they'd discussed she wasn't exactly the giving away type at their meetings. However, without missing a beat she hears the shuffling of feet and turns around to see Charge, 2Dads, RO, Bird, Cook, Maxine, Sally, Chefo, Nikki and Bomber all standing in their various spots around the room. "We do." They chorus in unison. Then, with our missing a beat, they all salute her and Dutchy, and she can't stop her instinct saluting them back.

"Thanks, guys." Kate whispers.

Charge winks as they all make to resume their seats. "Hey," He shrugs. "You're a true  _Hammersley's_ daughter."

Blinking tears out of her eyes, Kate turns back to the celebrant as she begins to recite a poem, marvelling in just how lucky she is.

* * *

She'd known if anything could have reduced her to tears, it would have been this; Dutchy's wedding vows. But she's still not prepared for the intensity of his stare, and the hitch in his voice as he looks deep into her eyes. "Kate," He begins, and it's just her name but there's already tears pooling in her eyes and she's glad Gracie assured her the makeup was waterproof.

He seems to know what she's thinking because he smiles and brushes a thumb lightly against her cheek, swiping away a stray tear. "Kate, I... I just can't believe we're here. I never thought that I could ever be so lucky, and now I'm standing here about to marry my best friend. Today, I have the absolute pleasure of standing here, in front of all our friends and family, knowing that we're about to start the first day of the rest of our lives together. I can't promise that I won't be overprotective of you, or Mackenzie or our kids. But I can promise that I'm always going to be there for you, when things are great and when all you want to do is hide from the world. I promise to love you, care for you, listen to you and be there for you, always. Everything I have to give is yours."

Kate takes a few shaky breaths in an attempt to calm herself, but she knows she's lost the battle when she feels more tears splash down her cheek. "Don't cry, or I'll cry." Mackenzie moans pathetically, leaning forward to pass Kate a tissue.

When she's recovered enough to speak, Kate begins her own vows. "Dutchy... Dylan..." There's a trickle of laughter at the name slip-up. "You've been a constant for... years. You've had my back since you met me," She tips her head slightly, "whether I wanted that or not. I think that there's different kinds of love and ours snuck up on both of us. Suddenly I looked at you and I just knew that you were the guy. You were the one I wanted to spend my life with. I am crazy head over heels in love with you, and I can't wait to start our lives together. You've never shied away from my neurotic tendencies and airports worth of baggage. You've been there for me every step of the way. I want to be your wife, to help share your baggage too. To be with you on good days and bad. I want to marry my best friend."

"Then let's do it." Dutchy laughs, turning to Olive.

Olive let's out an indulgent smile and turns to the crowd gathered. "Do you, Kate, take Dylan Harrison Mulholland, to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do."

"And do you, Dylan, take Kate Violet McGregor to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"You betcha." Dutchy laughs.

"Then by the power vested in me by the Commonwealth of Australia, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may-" But the rest of her sentence is cut out by a storm of cheers and whistles as Dutchy and Kate close the distance.

"Hey," he whispers in her ear. "Wifey." And he captures Kate's smiling mouth with his.

* * *

The rest of the afternoon is a whirl of well-wishes and photographs, as Kate, Mackenzie, Dutchy, Cleo and Chloe are whisked away for wedding photographs. By the time they arrive back at the house, there's a party in full swing. Charge is armed with a video camera and is filming Testimonials of conversations Kate shudders to think about. Clutching a sleepy Cleo in her arms, she quickly spots Spider and makes a beeline for them.

As he catches sight of her he grins in a slightly hesitant way, but approaches her all the same. "X! Sorry, Boss. I mean, uh, Lieutenant Commander?" He offers a sloppy sort of salute.

"At ease, Spider." Kate grins, wrapping him in a quick hug. "Thanks for coming."

"Yeah, well, thanks for inviting me." He seems a little more relaxed as he takes another gulp of his beer.

"I hear you're a Leading Seaman now. Congratulations."

Spider blushes just a little. "Thanks, Ma'am. And... uh... congratulations."

"You know you can call me Kate." Kate points out, but just like 2Dads had, he pulls an uncomfortable face.

"It's just... weird. It's like-"

"If you say anything about relating me to your mother, I'll kick your arse, pregnant or not." She grins, before shaking her head. "Oh, sorry. Uh, this is Dylan my... my husband." She can't stop the smile that pulls at her with that word. "And Mackenzie, my sister. Guys, this is Spider."

"Nice to meet you both. Ah, Bomb and Nav were over here somewhere." He gestures with his beer in the vague direction towards the pool and Kate nods, readjusting Cleo in her arms. Sneaking a peek at the girl, she sees that Cleo is fast asleep.

As if on cue, Donna approaches. "She made it through photos okay?" She enquires anxiously. Kate nods and Donna sighs in relief. "If you give her here, I'm going to put her down inside."

No sooner has she relinquished her hold on the toddler that a squealing brunette throws herself into Kate's arms. "Congratulations!" Nikki squeaks, before wrapping Mackenzie in a hug too. "There's me bawling my eyes out like a baby. I think 2Dads took photos of me blubbering and put them on twitter. Pain in the arse." She sniffs, before turning to Mackenzie. "And it's so great to finally meet you, Mackenzie. I've heard so much from you. And you, Dylan. Nice to meet you too. I'm Nikki Caetano. I left just before you showed up on  _Hammersley._ "

Dutchy opens his mouth, but he's saved the trouble of responding as Charge's voice rings out on the microphone. "Ladies and gentlemen... and sailors." There's a drunken cheer at Charge's words. "Having volunteered myself as MC, it gives me great pleasure to introduce to you Mr and Mrs Mulholland as they are forcibly pressured into their first dance as husband and wife."

Kate turns and throws a glare at her sister. "I said no dancing!" She whines.

"Would you please make this lovely couple welcome? Chanting and pressure is encouraged. We have a bit of an unusual choice of wedding song but then it's not the weirdest thing about this wedding so go for it." Kate laughs out loud as the opening to  _Bad Moon Rising_ starts to play.

There's a collection of scattered laughter as Kate takes Dutchy's hand and the two begin an ungamely dance. As he spins her around, he lowers his mouth to her ear. "We're married." He whispers. "I can't believe it."

* * *

After a string of songs Kate is sure have been lifted directly from her Spotify account, Charge once again takes the microphone. They'd opted for a 'help yourself' style of buffet rather than hiring a caterer, so without the time frame of an actual meal, Kate wasn't really sure what was happening. However, apparently the speeches were upon them.

"Hello again! Ah, for those of you who don't know me, I'm Charge, or Andy, and I have had the pleasure of working with both Kate and Dutchy- uh, Dylan over the years. And I would like to share with you a little about the kind of people they are at work, because it's a side very few people get to see. So I have known Kate for... seven years now. And over the course of those seven years I have seen this woman taken hostage, drugged, poisoned, shot, seasick... yes, she did succumb to sea sickness Zee." There's a titter of laughter, and Kate feels her face flush. "Uh, she's been chased by an actual axe murderer, almost died in a fire, gotten a black eye curtusy of our dear Dutchy," Kate catches Dutchy's gaze, and he mouths an apology, "well-intentioned I assure you. Ah, she's been nearly killed by some guy chasing her with a car and had cyanide thrown in her face. Am I forgetting any?" He turns his question to Kate, who shrugs.

"Probably." She muses drily, wracking her brain and coming up with at least three other injuries he's forgotten, although willing to share none of these with a backyard of people.

"Anyway, it seems like quite the list. But pretty quickly I also realised that she can more than take care of herself. I've also watched her shoot a man chasing her with a flare gun from twenty metres. Or shout at her hostage taker. Or steal a motorbike with Dutchy over here chasing down grog runners. She's resourceful, determined and strong, and she's not bad on the eyes either. Anyway, I guess this just seems like a long, rambling list of your past injuries and ailments, and maybe it is, but I just can't tell you what it means to see Kate finally happy. Because she's had the  _Hammersley's_ back for so long, and now she has got someone to have her back." He winks at Kate, who mouths a word of thanks. "One of our late crew members, Swain, was telling me about the time when Dutchy was in the wardroom after one of his frequent injuries. And completely high on pethadine, he proceeded to hit on Kate. I know that's an occasion many of us would have paid to see. But I think it just goes to show that Dutchy has always gone to Kate, even completely out of it. Anyway, I'm kind of rambling. Full disclosure, I've had a few beers. Basically, to Kate and Dylan!"

There's an echoing of  _for Kate and Dylan_ and Kate sees hundreds of glasses raise in hers and Dutchy's direction. A moment later there's the sound of a microphone being passed, and Kate looks up to see Mackenzie standing in Charge's place, looking nervous but determined.

"Oh hi there. Uh, bridesmaid. Sister. And I'm terrible at speeches so... bear with me? Uh, I have only known Kate for about six months. And in that time I've had my whole life turned upside down. But Kate was a constant. She was there for me in a time when... I couldn't see a silver lining. She opened up her home to me without question, and gave me not just a place to stay, but a family. And I've known Dutchy for just as long. Not many guys would drive to the middle of Australia with a cat, just to be there as a friend buried their mother, but then again it didn't take me very long to realise that Dutchy wasn't just any guy. He's  _the guy_ for Kate. I think you only have to look at them for a moment to see that. Guys, I..." Mackenzie's voice cracks, and as she looks around she sees quite a few teary faces. "I can't express how much it means to me that... that both of you are starting this new life together, with two beautiful girls on the way, and despite all this promise, you've... you've never made me feel anything less than part of your family. I don't know many people who would take on someone else's teenager. But you both did without question. And I'm so honoured to be here today watching you get married."

She wipes impatiently at her eye and turns to Charge, waving him over.

"I... uh... know you guys weren't exactly planning on a honeymoon. But I think with twins on the way you've deserved a break. So the  _Hammersley_  peeps all got together and got you four nights up in the Daintree. And our lovely Commander White has approved leave for the entire  _Hammersley_ crew until then. So... you know, party hard?"

And with a welcoming cheer from the crowd at large, the music starts up again.


	30. Chapter 30

"We should just stay here forever." Kate mumbles lazily into Dutchy's shoulder. "This place is beautiful." In response, he runs a hand over her collarbone, brushing the hair that has fallen loose from her chignon and is now everywhere, hiding her face from view. He's rewarded with Kate's smile, swollen lips and all.

"Hey, no complaints from me." He grins back, pressing a kiss to the knuckles of her left hand and grinning as he feels the metal of her wedding band against his lips. "If it were up to me, we'd live here the rest of our lives. And I mean specifically in this bed. Although the private outdoor bath is pretty inspiring as well."

"Hmm..." Kate muses, content to stay in again but figuring they should  _probably_ do something that doesn't involve the honeymoon suite; she wants to be able to respond to questions about what they'd done with more than a stammer and blush, especially from Mackenzie. Unable to help herself though and still burning with desire, she muses wickedly, "I think we made use of the shower too. And we could probably do that again and then we should probably get some breakfast."

She hears the low rumble of Dutchy's laugh, ear still pressed to his chest. "A shower sounds... quite refreshing." He agrees, sounding for all intents and purposes the most serious of people. "You'll have to join me, though. Time is of the essence." She turns her face to his, grinning wickedly. And a moment later, his hand on hers escalates into a make-out session a teenager would be proud of. For several moments there's nothing but for the distant sounds of birds as Kate and Dutchy kiss, but it's Kate that breaks it, slapping a hand lightly on his chest before pulling herself to her feet. "Seriously, Sailor. Need food."

"What sort of food?" He calls after her, admiring her retreating form, and Kate hears the rustle of sheets and padding of feet as he dashes to keep up with her.

"Carbs." She quips back, winking as she tugs open the shower door and steps inside. "And trust me, you're going to need some too if we're keeping this up."

Dutchy groans but throws a lopsided salute in her direction before following her. "Yes, Ma'am." He grins at her, sealing his words with another kiss.

o0o

"So... picnic?" Kate enquires as she drains the rest of her orange juice and sets the empty glass back against the white linen tablecloth, running her eyes down the list of available activities. "Or... snorkelling? Boats?"

"We can't get away from the water, can we?" Dutchy grins, popping the last bit of his breakfast (although is it breakfast at past midday?) in his mouth and groaning slightly as he leans back. "Or food. We have eaten so much. I mean, you're eating for three. I reckon I might just have eaten the entirety of the galley."

"Well, I'd say we've earned it." Kate quips back. "And speaking of food, they've got a cooking class."

Dutchy's eyes widen. "But this poor rainforest doesn't need to get burned down, does it?"

Kate stares innocently up at him. "So... snorkelling?"

o0o

"What about Cora?" Dutchy suggests, as they stroll back onto the boat and take their seats for the trip back to the mainland. Kate's hair has gone slightly curly from the sea water, wisps even now framing her face, but they've had a great time on the reefs all the same, with a camera full of photographs and their skin itching with salt. And she loves that she gets to have this time with him, where they're not on the water facing sunburn and heat exhaustion chasing down illegal fisherman and instead just appreciating the beauty of the land they usually protect. "Cora Mulholland?" One hand reaches over to draw lazy circles on her stomach.

Kate tips her head, considering for a moment. "I don't know. Does that name seem too... spirited? I don't even know the right word. Uh... forget it."

"Coral, then?" He tries again. Kate snorts with laughter, and Dutchy looks at her in alarm, as though she's gone mad. "What? What's so bad about that? We're both oceany people?"

"Just reminds me of your husband-killing probably-lesbian ex-girlfriend Laurel." Dutchy rolls his eyes, and Kate hastens to add. "Which is not making fun of your plight. Just..." Then she stops, not even looking up as the tow is dropped and the crew move amongst the boat. "I think it just hit me." Kate finishes softly.

"What hit you?" Dutchy looks utterly perplexed, and positively flinches as the boat starts up and the safety demonstration for the trip home begins.

Some distant part of Kate nags that she too should be listening but after all, it was the same as the trip in and anyway, she's sure both she and Dutchy could bloody well take  _command_  in any emergency without breaking a sweat. So she continues their conversation, lowering her voice and leaning closer, so as not to disturb those around them dutifully listening. "We're married. We're... we're having two little girls in mere months and... and... I just can't believe it." She flushes slightly. "And now I sound all mushy and girly."

"Hey, don't worry. I'll still love you when you're mushy and girly." He touches a hand to her back, and she settles herself more comfortably against him.

"I'm just resigned to the fact that either you're away and I go through labour alone, or we have all of the crew, my sister and probably your parents pacing the corridors."

"Sounds fair." Dutchy and Kate both grin at the image for a moment, with 2Dads probably trawling the corridors taking last-minute bets on size, weight and time, and Sofia wringing her hands, and Mackenzie's eager face. Then his smile slips.

Glancing up, Kate seems to sense something is up. "Hey. I... I understand." She takes his hand, and it seems to give him the strength to keep talking.

"I know I can't promise to be there. And don't want to think of you alone for that." She wants him there too, wants nothing more than to storm into NAVCOM and beg Maxine to please, please,  _please_ make sure that he's there, but she knows that it's all a roll of the dice, and after the wedding and the time off, it was unreasonable to put her in that position again.

"Well," Kate begins, trying to reassure him in the best way she can. "Sally offered to stay with me. But then she's got to get a sitter for Chloe and... and your Mum offered. But I... I don't know how I feel about that. I mean, I'm grateful for the offer but... eh, I don't know."

"Maxine?" Dutchy cracks a smile as she squeezes his hand again. "You and her are good friends now?"

"Yeah, but that still feels weird. I mean, she  _is_  my boss." Kate looks as if she's about to over-analyse for a moment, but then seems to pull herself out of it. "But, hey, our relationship was weird before, anyway."

"Ha." Dutchy lets out a snort of laughter. "You reckon if we told her we were naming one of them Maxine, she'd make sure  _Hammersley_ was in port?"

Kate smiles at the thought that the idea had crossed his mind too. But his smirk mingled with the slight look of disgust in his eyes at naming their child Maxine, tells her he's now ready to joke about it. "Maxine's trying to push Hazel at the moment. Hazel and Callisto. And with suggestions like that I'm not sure how her son is just called Ryan. Actually, this could help us." She bends down as much as she can with her ever-growing belly, managing to snag a strap of her bag and feeling very glad she doesn't have to ask him for help to do something as simple as that.  _Yet._

"What's going to help us? Callisto and Hazel? 'Cos they're a definite no from me."

Kate extracts her phone and unlocks it easily, wondering if the speed now in which she pulls up twitter is slightly telling of just tech-addicted she's become since actually being on shore with working reception. "You know they're all suggesting names on the twitter thread? And not just, like, names. But saying Thunder should be named these ones and Lightning these."

"Thunder and Lightning did catch on. I'll be damned." Dutchy muses, looking slightly impressed at 2Dads' drunken nicknames.

"Listen to this; Thunder - Nadia or Lilith. Lightning - Jolene. Who wrote that? Uh, Charge. Okay, so that's a bust." She starts to hum the chorus to  _Jolene,_ then just as quickly stops and flushes when she realises what she's doing.

"I don't mind Lilith." Dutchy reasons, mercifully passing over the Dolly Parton humming. "Don't love it, but... it's actually one of his better suggestions."

Kate actually laughs out loud, drawing a few curious eyes from fellow passengers. Wincing, she turns back to Dutchy. "You can't name a baby after a baby-stealing demon. She's the mother of all demons."

Dutchy peers at her curiously for a moment. "How do you..." Then his eyes widen with a look of dawning comprehension. " _Mackenzie_." They both say in unison, and Dutchy turns back to peering at the twitter feed on his own screen. "That girl does love her mythology. She suggested Circe and Calliope. Calliope I actually quite like. Circe on the other hand..." He pulls a face. "And Bird's suggestions are all so... girly. Daisy, Petunia, Lavender? Petal?"

"Well, I'm about to block Spider, because he just keeps sending in gifs from  _The Shining._ "

Dutchy looks at Kate's phone just in time to catch a glimpse of twin girls in matching dresses. "Uh, what's  _The Shining_?"

Kate's eyes widen, turning to face her husband (and maybe she smiles a little bit more, because she doesn't think she'll ever get tired of saying that.  _Husband_.) "Seriously? The twins in the matching dresses." She adopts a creepy, sing-song voice and leans closer to Dutchy's ear. ' _Come play with us, Danny. Forever and ever and ever.'"_

"Oh, that creepy horror film with... like... there's a hotel or something, and... the kid sees stuff?"

"This is a classic horror film and you haven't seen it?" Dutchy wonders if he's ever seen her look so incredulous. "Oh, man, we are so watching it. It's one of my favourites." Now it's his turn to look incredulous. "What? I like horror films. When we had  _Hammersley_ movie nights, 2Dads and I would always pick that one." Then her eyes widen slightly. "But come to think of it, whenever we had horror films, you'd  _suddenly_ get a  _date_  or an  _urgent text_ and-"

"Oh, fine. You've got me. I'm scared of horror films." Kate claps her hand in victory, and Dutchy rushes to scrabble back whatever dignity he's just lost by trying to justify himself. "Gracie loves them and she made me... made me watch this one with... like a stake through a belly and- nup, you... you watch them with her."

"Aww, it's okay." Kate can't stop laughing, and Dutchy has to fight the urge to kiss it off her, but loses it at her next words as she turns to look him squarely in the eyes. "You're still my big, strong husband."

o0o

After calling Mackenzie to check in and Kate shares a (very abridged) account of their trip so far, before reassuring Mackenzie what feels like a million times that  _yes_  everything is lovely,  _yes_ babies are fine and  _yes,_ of course I bloody miss you.

Mackenzie, for her part, is inclined to be her usual cheeky self, recounting in detail how Stella has helped Zee dye her hair black, wear makeup and ride a motorbike so that she can make small-time pot sales, before adding a hasty  _just kidding, Kate!_

Even though Kate knows Zee is joking, she still puts up with Mackenzie's teasing of how easily she is to prank now, just so she can talk to Gracie and Stella and assure herself Mackenzie is definitely not on her way to the back of a thirty-six year old's motorbike. Making sure to thank them again before passing the phone to Dutchy, Kate fills the tub and sinks into it, relishing in the weightlessness of the water. The bath is bigger than hers at home and she finds herself utterly at peace.

Kate only looks up when she hears the sliding of a door that announces Dutchy's arrival. "Room for me too?" He winks, hovering at the side of the bath. In retaliation, knowing she can get him, Kate slaps a hand onto the surface of the water, dousing him in bath water.

"Bloody cheek." Kate giggles, as a handful of soap suds drop from Dutchy's head. "Calling your new wife fat."

"I'm not calling you fat. Just..." His hand dips below the surface of the water to trail against her leg. "...wondering if there might be room for... marital things."

Kate quirks an eyebrow. "Marital things?" She repeats, pretending to puzzle over it with all the seriousness of a scientist. "And what would  _marital things_ -" She frames the words in air quotes, "entail?"

"Okay." Dutchy stands up, eyes twinkling, and adopts a remorseful look. Kate nearly stands up after him, wondering whether she's offended him, before he says, with an air of confessing to a serious crime. "Okay. So... maybe not so marital."

Kate turns a critical eye on the size of the bath. "Well, it is bigger than the one we have at home." Then she turns to him, reaching out a hand to tug on his shirt. "Get in, Sailor."

o0o

The next day sees them take a picnic opposite a trickling stream, observing the nature around them and steadily eating through the picnic basket they'd ordered that morning. Just as Kate has decided the day can get no better, she catches a flash of green fluttering in amongst the trees. "Look." Kate points. "Cairns Birdwing Butterfly. My favourite animal."

"Your favourite animal is the butterfly?" Dutchy repeats with interest, peering at the fluttering insect.

"Yes, it is." Kate says with a hint of defensiveness. She ducks her gaze, and Dutchy, who'd been expecting some witty retort, frowns when none comes.

"Kate?"

"It's fine." She says, a little too quickly.

"If I've offended you-"

"No, it's just..." Kate picks up one of her sandwich crusts and starts to pull it apart, scattering bread crumbs across her lap. "Uh, Debbie knew I loved them. That was how she tricked me into leaving England. She said we were going to a butterfly sanctuary." Kate shakes her head in a self-deprecating way. "So stupid. She knew how much I loved them. Then, when we got on the plane, she gave me some special medicine - sleeping tablets probably - because when I woke up we were in Australia"

"You were a kid." Dutchy murmurs, tugging her lightly so that her head rests on his shoulder. "She shouldn't have done that to you." His hand touches the place where, he knows, her cigarette burns hide. "Any of it."

She wonders whether her mother had ever held her pregnant stomach and believed she'd be a good mum. Whether she'd sat with her husband and envisioned the life that they'd live.

"You're not her." Dutchy's voice cuts through her consciousness, as though he'd read her thoughts. "You're going to love these girls, protect them. You'd never hurt them. There is no doubt in my mind."

"But what if I don't... don't know how to-"

"Don't know how to what? Love them?" Dutchy shakes his head incredulously. "Kate, you already love them!"

"But what if I don't know how to be a parent?"

Dutchy looks incredulously up at her. "Kate," He says really softly. "You've been parenting Mackenzie for months. And... and you're doing amazing. You only have to look at her for a second to see that."

Kate looks up at Dutchy, tears in her eyes. "Thanks." She whispers. He grins, glad she's more confident now, and presses a kiss to the top of her head. "Hey," Kate frowns, brow furrowed. "What's your favourite animal?"

"Giraffe." Dutchy mumbles, almost apologetically. When Kate laughs, he hastens to add, "Hey, they're amazing creatures. Majestic."

o0o

As they make their winding drive back to Cairns the following day, Kate scrolls through the twitter thread while Dutchy drives, his terrible music turned down to at least a semi-acceptable level. "Ready to go home?" He enquires, one hand sitting lazily on the steering wheel while the other digs in the centre console for a box of mints.

"Ready to get the babies' room done." Kate muses, refusing the offered mint. "But I've just missed the hell out of Zee."

"Yeah, so have I." Dutchy admits. "It's weird without having her teasing us, isn't it? I've grown used to her sarcastic nature. You think she'll like the bracelet we got her?"

"You picked it. And yes, she'll love it." Kate's eyes widen as she catches sight of her phone screen. "Holy crap!"

"What?" Dutchy's eyes dart around, as though expecting to see an elephant in the middle of the road or a tsunami approaching.

"Twitter update from Bird." Kate scrolls, eyes widening still further.

Dutchy visibly relaxes. "What's she suggested this time?"

"Oh no. She has news.  ** _aftermath of #hammersleywedding2019 2dads spide learn inflatable suits grog don't mix #concussion #8stitches"_** She knows she can't show Dutchy the photo while driving, so adds, "And there's a picture of Spider with what looks like broken fingers and 2Dads with a bandage on his head. Where would he have gotten inflatable suits from?!"

"It's 2Dads." Dutchy deadpans. "Wonder how the CO felt about that." He glances at the clock. "Head straight to Gracie and Stella's? Or you wanna head home?"

"Go there. I..." She's about to say that it's closer, then settles on the real reason. "I miss Zee."

o0o

"Mr and Mrs Mulholland!" Mackenzie calls from the window as Dutchy and Kate climb out of the car. Kate laughs, and by the time they've made it to the front door, Zee is pulling the door open, her hair still mercifully blonde and free from any piercings or tattoos. Mackenzie throws herself into Kate's arms, then Dutchy's. "Hey, you changing your name? Am I going to be the only McGregor?"

"She's keeping it for work, changing it for home." Dutchy informs her. "So... not if you join the Navy?" He concludes, grinning. A moment later they're interrupted as Gracie shows up.

"Hey, bro! And now sis!" Gracie takes her turn at hugging them. "This kid cooks like a pro! Give some of those other chefs a run for their money. We'll keep her if you let us."

Dutchy grins and ruffles Zee's hair. "Sorry. This one's ours."


	31. Chapter 31

"She still not up?" Kate jumps as Dutchy's hand touches her shoulder, and she whips her head around fast, feeling slightly guilty at being caught staring at Zee's door again.

"No." Kate leans into his touch for a moment before leading the way back into their room. "I don't know if..." She exhales heavily, flourishing a hand in the direction of the room. "Do I go in there? Do I leave her?"

"I really don't know." Dutchy murmurs, looking just as anxious as she is. "But... I think I'm going to clear out for the day. Leave the two of you. It's not... it's a day for you two."

Kate nods in agreement. Even though she desperately wants him to stay, she understands why Dutchy is leaving. "Ride safe." She mutters distractedly as he swipes his motorbike keys from the bedside drawer.

"Text me if you need anything." He murmurs back, before leaving her with nothing but Mackenzie's door.

* * *

It's only twenty minutes before Kate cracks, abandoning her book in favour of wrapping on the heavy door before she can stop herself. She doesn't get a response, but she's not sure she's expecting one.

"Zee?" She tries tentatively. Pushing open the door, she has to blink hard to let her eyes adjust to the darkness. Mackenzie's blinds are still drawn, their heavy orange fabric keeping out the bright Cairns sunshine. Zee is just distinguishable in the halflight as a lump underneath the doona. "Mackenzie?"

She doesn't move, but there's a hitch in her breathing that lets Kate know she's been heard. Feeling braver, Kate closes the distance between herself and the bed, stopping as her knees brush against the hanging edge of the blanket. "Mackenzie?" She tries again. One hand stretches out almost unconsciously, coming to rest on what she is sure is Mackenzie's back. "Zee, honey?"

Slowly, very slowly, Mackenzie pushes the doona off her face, swiping sweaty and tearstained hair out of her face. Without preamble, she whimpers, "Do you know what day it is?"

Kate nods slowly. "Yeah, honey, I do."

Immediately, Mackenzie dissolves into a fresh wave of tears and, with a little manoeuvring, Kate lifts herself onto the bed, hugging her sister as best she can with her belly between them. "A year." Zee sobs. "A - whole - year." And despite everything, Kate can't fight the tears that prick in front of her own face too. "I - miss - her."

"I know, Zee. I know." But Kate knows her words mean nothing, knows that very little matters when a year ago you watched your mother die. And so she just stays, rubbing circles on Mackenzie's back. "I'm here, Zee."

* * *

They make their meandering way along the Esplanade, hair blowing slightly in the breeze. "She'd have loved it here." Mackenzie's voice is barely audible over the squawking of gulls and the chatter of pedestrians. "The beach. She was always trying to get us there. One day."

Kate gives a sad smile but says nothing, remembering the washing powder bucket full of coins that had sat underneath their Australian sink for as long as Kate could remember, steadily filling with silver coins until it would be inevitably spent on booze, or stolen by some debt-ridden boyfriend. That had been the seaside fund too, Debbie dazzling Kate with glossy magazine images of glittering blue seas and yellow sand.

"She was always telling me that we'd go and see Bondi Beach, and the Great Barrier Reef, and... and she never got to go. She never got to go anywhere, did she?" Mackenzie turns her head to face Kate.

Kate doesn't know what to say, but finds herself settling on the truth. "Well, I... when she got pregnant with me, she was seventeen. She didn't... really have time to travel. She barely had time to be a kid herself." Kate wonders vaguely if that was why Debbie had resented her so much. "She married my Dad and after they split... she came here." Mackenzie nods soberly, and, not for the first time, Kate is struck by just how wise Mackenzie is.

They stop at a pedestrian crossing, Mackenzie pummelling the crossing button more times than is strictly necessary, until Kate takes her hand and squeezes.

"Have you ever been back to England?" Mackenzie sniffs, changing the subject, Kate assumes, to distract herself from fresh tears.

Kate bites her lip and scrapes her hair back into a ponytail, stalling for time. "No. I... haven't really got any reason to go back."

Zee frowns. "But your Dad?"

"He's dead." Kate cuts in. "I found out when I was eighteen." She catches sight of Mackenzie's curious face, and then shakes her head. "He... he killed himself. Two years after we left. He thought..." Kate's voice cracks, but she forces herself to keep talking. "Well, he thought I was dead."

"I'm sorry." Zee bows her head as they make their way across the road, wending their way through tourists and pedestrians alike.

Kate shakes her own head and continues their walk down past the lagoon. "I came to terms with it a long time."

Mackenzie's voice cracks once more, but she fights her way through it. "I don't know how I can ever get over Mum's death."

"I... I never got over Dad's death." Kate corrects. "I just... learned to live with it. It became less raw, less... pressing."

There's a splash, and Kate and Mackenzie both feel flecks of chlorinated water speckle their skin. "You call him Dad." Mackenzie observes.

Kate frowns, not quite sure of the point of this statement. "I... yeah?"

"But you call  _her_ Debbie." Mackenzie presses, and there's a childlike naivety to her voice that pulls at Kate's heartstrings.

"Oh." Kate hesitates, slowing in her movements. "I..." She trails off, not quite sure what to say. After all, it's been years since she ever considered herself to have a mother.

And then words start to tumble from Zee's mouth, and Kate knows the young girl has been holding the questions in for a long time. "Why didn't you talk to her? I mean, you joined the Navy. But... but why didn't you ever call? Why didn't you ever write or... or visit or..." Mackenzie swallows. "Why did I never  _know_ you?"

"Zee-"

"No!" Mackenzie explodes. Several people turn around. "It's been a year. I want to know. I  _need_ to know! What was so bad? What  _happened?_ "

Kate's tongue darts out between her mouth to moisten her lips, and then she nods, gesturing towards a picnic table in the shade of a tree. "Can we sit?"

* * *

"It wasn't some... some big bad attack like you're imagining. It was... death by a thousand cuts, I guess. It was... it was a lot of little things. And... it got too much." Kate takes a deep breath. "She wasn't always bad. At the start, when I was a kid, she was... magical. She had this great imagination, and she was always making up these elaborate stories for me. Dad worked a lot and she filled in the gaps. I never knew she was unhappy. But... well, she must have been. She had an affair."

"An affair?" Mackenzie blinks, and not for the first time, Kate wonders how much information is too much.

"She might have had more. I... I never really knew the details. Until him. She had an affair with his brother. And when Dad found out he was... hurt. He wanted to work it out, wanted to sort things, and I guess that must have made her madder because before I knew it we were... here. In Australia. In that dusty, dry house and a new boyfriend. An opal miner. And while he was there, things were good. Until he shot through. And then she started drinking."

Mackenzie chews on the inside of her lip, and Kate reaches out to squeeze her hand again. "When she would sober up, she'd apologise, telling me she was sorry, that she wanted to be better. And then she'd pick up the bottle again. And when she was drunk she was... nasty. Vicious. She'd say stuff... about how her life would have been better without me, about how much of a disappointment I was. She'd go on about how I was a terrible baby and a terrible child and that no one could ever love me and... things like that get to you. And then she met Max when I was... twelve? And things got worse. Because Debbie just used her words but he..." She hesitates once again, but Mackenzie shakes her head.

"Just... just tell me, Kate. I can deal with it."

Kate nods tentatively, then continues. "Debbie used her words, and he used his fists." Once again, she hesitates, adding, "I don't want to turn you against your father."

"Kate, I need to know. What... what happened?"

Kate takes a deep breath and ploughs on. "The first time, it was just a backhander. I spoke back or... or something. The second... a slap. He'd apologise each time, give me money or... or a new book or something. It wasn't all the time, and it was easy to tell myself that it was my fault. But after a while, all pretences were gone. He beat me. And I had... broken ribs, black eyes. And... she'd patch me up, put the makeup on to hide my bruises and tell me that he doesn't really mean it, that he loves us, really. That it's my fault because I'm too outspoken, too stubborn, too rude. That I should be better."

"She-" Mackenzie swallows. "She was wrong."

"And then, when I tried to stop her, she... she hit me. And that... that was the start of a destructive path for me. My father hadn't bothered to look for me. My mother didn't love me. So I looked for love in... other places."

"Other places?" Mackenzie repeats, her brow furrowed. "I don't-"

"I slept around." Kate doesn't want to sugar coat it, but she can't fight the shame creeping through her veins. "I slept with anyone who'd have me. I got a bad reputation and I stuck to it. By day I was a straight A student, and by night I was the town slut." She spits out the words like poison, and this time it's Mackenzie who reaches out to Kate.

"Kate-"

"I'm... I'm okay. Uh... Max left when I was about sixteen. By that point I'd kind of... lost all hope for a mother. Debbie wanted to make amends but... I told her to get fucked. And the next year of our lives was that more of... I don't know... business partners? Room mates? She went on benders, I cared for her, and beyond that we were done. I was trying anything to get out of town and with all the talk of the sea... the Navy just appealed to me. And I got in. I told her I was taking and she... didn't take that very well. Our last meeting was... the cigarette burns. She knocked me to the ground trying to get me to stay. She was grabbing me. She didn't mean to burn me. But... this time I hit back. I... remember I managed to get her on the ground and I just... I wanted to keep hitting her. But I made myself stop, and she was yelling at me to just go, so... so I threw my stuff in the back of my car and took off. And that was the last time I saw her. Until... a year ago."

"Kate," It seems to be all Mackenzie can muster up to say. The look of disgust and anger on Mackenzie's face is almost too much for Kate to handle. "Kate-"

"She changed, Zee." Kate cuts off Mackenzie's words before she can even get them out, knowing how Mackenzie's thought process would have evolved. "She changed."

But Zee appears to be beyond consolation. Already she's rising to her feet, cracking her knuckles. "How can you sit here comforting me when my parents-"

Kate stands up too, reaching out to grab Mackenzie's arm. "Zee, I... they did bad things. But they changed for you. They love you."

Zee shakes her head, but she seems to be calming down at least. "I... I don't know many people who could go through that and still preach forgiveness."

"I don't think I could ever forgive them. But... I'm glad you're you. They were good parents to you and for that... I'm grateful." Kate knows it to be true; Debbie may have been shit to Kate, but she was glad Mackenzie had had a good life. "Everything I went through brought me here today. And... and my life is pretty good. I've got a great husband, I've got two girls on the way and... and I've got the best sister in you. Everything lead me to you and... and I wouldn't change that for the world." She's pretty sure they're both crying, but can't muster the energy to wipe away her tears. Instead, she throws her arms around Mackenzie. The two of them stand there, swaying slightly in the breeze. Kate could have happily stood there all day, but the twins obviously had other ideas, and Kate gently detaches herself. "I'm so sorry to break this moment up, but one of the kids is dancing on my bladder."

Mackenzie lets out a snort of laughter, wiping her eyes with the back of a hand. "Yeah, yeah, blame the nieces."

Falling into step, they head in the general direction of the public toilets. "So," Kate begins good-naturedly. "I really need to pee, but after that, what do you want to do? For the rest of the day, it's you and me."

Mackenzie nods soberly. "Maybe... maybe we could just walk."

"Yeah." Kate nods. "That sounds good."

* * *

The next few months pass ridiculously fast. Somewhat at least. The days seem to drag particularly slowly, and Kate swears each report seems to take hours and hours to complete, more so when Dutchy is away on patrol. But all of a sudden, it seems, it is Kate's last day at work before maternity leave and she can't suppress the prickle of tears in her eyes as she turns to the Lieutenant Commander poised to take over her position while she's away. "Well, you... uh, have my number if you run into difficulties, Lieutenant Commander." She begins awkwardly, unable to fight the wobble in her voice as she tries not to cry. "And-"

"Ma'am..." Lieutenant Commander Garcia holds out her hand. "I'll be fine. You just look after your family." She nods at Kate's belly. "Fair winds, Ma'am."

* * *

"I mean, I almost cried." Kate complains later that night, as she hands over a plate of friend rice to Mackenzie and begins to dole one out for herself. "I'm already the white whale of the centre, what with..." She makes an exaggerated gesture in the direction of her belly, "... _this._ Imagine blubbering in the middle of NAVCOM to boot."

"And now you're on maternity leave." Mackenzie finishes, fanning her mouth as the rice apparently burns it. She takes a gulp of her orange juice and then continues as if there had been no interruption. "And now there's nothing left to do but... pop some kids."

"You make it sound so simple." Kate grins, taking a bite of her own rice. "And I'm hoping Dutchy's back before that."

Zee tips her head. "He's back tomorrow, isn't he?"

"Yeah." Kate agrees. "But I'm still not due for another three weeks." She shrugs and takes a deep breath. "Eh, I don't know. Can't do much about it." She turns to her fried rice. "Maybe I should be downing my rice in chilli sauce and curry powder. Isn't that supposed to induce labour?"

She reaches towards the spice cupboard, but Mackenzie snatches her hand back. "No, you can't go into labour tonight!"

"Why not?" Her eyes narrow. "What have you got planned?"

* * *

"I told you I didn't want a baby shower!" Kate is unable to keep the whine from her mouth as she watches Mackenzie hanging up purple streamers and decorations. "Don't you remember me saying that? And if you freaking say  _baby brain_ one more time..."

"I don't seem to recall that, no." Mackenzie smirks, successfully securing one end to the pillar of the veranda and moving to the other side. "And it's too late. I have decorations, food, games-" Kate lets out an audible groan. "So you're damn well going to enjoy yourself."

"But Zee..." Kate holds up her hands and whirls them around, as if struggling to convey just how terrible an idea this is. "Baby showers-"

"Are an archaic tradition dedicated to materialistic purchases?" Mackenzie suggests, unable to hide her grin.

"Are stupid." Kate finishes, folding her arms.

"I told everyone to bring a book instead of a card and to all write a message in there. I thought that would be a nice keepsake." Mackenzie says, as if there had been no interruption.

"That... is kind of cute, actually." Kate concedes.

"It is." Mackenzie grins as though Kate's words had been an acceptance of the day as a whole. "So go and get dressed and I'll see you in ten minutes."

* * *

By the time Kate returns to the backyard, it's to find a positive sea of the same shade of dusky purple they'd painted the nursery - not just the streamers she'd seen Mackenzie hang up, but balloons, paper baubles and tablecloths draped along three tables Zee has sourced from who-knows-where.

In front of the door is the same chalkboard from the wedding and etched in purple chalk are the words:

**_Dylan & Kate's Baby Shower_ **

**_#hammersleybaby2019_ **

"So exactly who did you invite to this little soiree?" Kate quips, taking a chip from a nearby bowl and popping it into her mouth, easily dodging the slap Mackenzie sends her way. "How social do I have to be?"

"Well, the  _Hammersley_ peeps of course." Mackenzie answers, successfully tying a bunch of balloons to a pillar. "Dutchy's family... so Sofia, Gracie, Stella. Donna couldn't come but Renee is. Um... Maxine is coming. Nikki was on patrol but Bomber was going to come. Uh... who else?"

"Who else is there?" Kate challenges.

"Sally. She's in. Ah... Spider was going to come but he got crash sailed. Uh... I don't know. Basically, I just went through your Facebook inviting people. Oh, someone called Jen Jones? I have no idea who she is but she seemed keen."

"You invited random people?" Kate groans. "Uh, Jen's the wife of Cheffo. You know... he was at the wedding. Seems like he should have been a comedian in a previous life?"

"Oh yeah!" Mackenzie snaps her fingers. "He was cute!"

Kate rolls her eyes. "Seriously?"

"Hey, I'm fourteen. Not blind." Kate is saved her lecture as a knock at the door rings out, even in the backyard. "Ooh, and people are here!" Mackenzie grins. "Let's go!"

* * *

It takes Kate exactly five minutes to realise she's probably going to have to get another house with the amount of stuff people had bought, and Kate realises that Charge's approximation of  _Hammersley_ losing a tonne of weight doesn't seem that big of an exaggeration.

"And... 2Dads, what is that?" Kate frowns as 2Dads arrives, dragging with it a flatpack so big, Kate wonders just how he got it there.

"Cubby house!" 2Dads answers, as though it should have been obvious. "Every kid needs a cubby house, Ma'am. Somewhere to hide, especially from Mum. Some of my best memories..." He trails off, looking wistful, and drops a gift bag on the designated 'present' table.

"Oh, gosh. And there's more." Kate groans. "You didn't have to take out a loan at the bank, did you?"

"Almost." 2Dads grins good-naturedly, resting the flatpack against the back fence. "Won big in a poker game, the night you told us you were knocked up.  _Didn't I?"_ He directs his last words in the direction of Kate's belly, and it's only her quick step backwards that prevents 2Dads from lowering his face to her stomach and chatting. "Oops. Sorry. Full disclosure, I had a few in the car over. But congrats Ma'am. Geez, you're getting big."

"Thanks." Kate mutters sarcastically. "Please tell me you didn't drive yourself."

"Nah, scabbed a lift with Dutchy. He's in there somewhere." He jabs a hand in the direction of the kitchen, before picking up a handful of chips. "So what happens at these things?"

"No idea." Kate shrugs. "But I'm going to go find my husband."

2Dads crinkles his nose. "It's so weird you guys are married." He comments. "It's good though. Just...  _weird."_

Rolling her eyes, Kate heads towards the kitchen and is rewarded almost immediately with the sight of her husband deep in conversation with his mother. When he sees her he wraps her in a tight hug before pressing a kiss to her cheek and whispering in her ear, "Sorry, got caught."

In response, Kate pats him consolingly on the arm and murmurs back, "I'm pretty sure 2Dads bought up half of Target for these girls."

"I know." Dutchy nods. "You didn't have to pack the car." He winks at her, before turning back to his mother. "Mum was suggesting Clementine as a name?"

Kate just manages to conceal her frown. "Uh... one to think over, hey." She concedes good-naturedly.

"Just think. Clementine and Jacinta." Sofia waves a hand in the air as though the names she suggested are visible. "Such beautiful names, aren't they?"

"They're sure something." Kate concedes, fighting hard to suppress her laugh. "Hungry?"

* * *

Between the people rubbing her belly, and those commenting on how big she's getting, Kate feels like a kettle on the boil. However, she must concede that she  _is_ having fun, loathe as she is to admit that to Mackenzie. Of course, the day is not without hitches, like 2Dads falling asleep on her lounge, or the Braxton-Hicks that plague her throughout the day, or Mackenzie smirking and holding up a onesie for all to see. She'd bought a whole lot of plain white onesies and a few packs of Sharpies, and Kate was seriously questioning Zee's judgement and trust in the  _Hammersley_ crew, especially now.

Underneath a cartoon boat, were the words:

**They don't call Daddy _boarding officer_ for nothing.**

"Hilarious, guys!" Kate scoffs, rolling her eyes and turning to the still-dozing Leading Seaman. "2Dads?"

"Hey, it wasn't me!" 2Dads protests, sitting up quickly and grinning at the onesie. "But that shit's hilarious. Uh... crap. Sorry. Didn't mean to say shit. Crap. Sorry. Uh..." He turns around. "Who was it?"

"Yeah, it was me." Charge booms, grinning broadly. "Couldn't resist."

"Well..." Kate peers at the onesie once more. "I mean, I don't appreciate the message. But that calligraphy is amazing."

"Perks of having a strict Mum." Charge grins. "So... presents?"

* * *

"You... these are actually really cute." Kate smiles as she withdraws two matching sun-yellow dresses.

2Dads grins. "You sound surprised." He directs his next sentence at Kate's belly once more. "I've gotta look out for the little yezhi, don't I?"

"Yezhi?" Kate frowns.

"Hedgehogs." He answers.

"Ouch." Kate tugs the dress free and grins. "This is really beautiful, 2Dads." Kate brushes a hand against the bright yellow fabric before digging further in the bag and tugging free two stuffed toy hedgehogs and several children's books. "Didn't go overboard at all?"

"Well..." 2Dads tips his head to the side. "A little. But there's just so much cute clothing out. And I have to spoil Baby Thunder and Lightning, don't I?"

"That's not carrying on when they're born." Kate mutters.

"Thunder and Lightning?" Sofia frowns.

"Uh... RHIB callsigns." 2Dads hastens to answer. "Uh... tiny boats attached to  _Hammersley_?"

Sofia sighs in realisation and Kate turns her attention to the still-massive pile of presents. "I just wanted to say..." She feels herself choking up and forces herself to keep talking. "Thank you. To all of you. These girls are going to be the most spoiled girls in the world, but... they're lucky to have you all in their lives." And as she catches Dutchy's gaze across the yard, she can't smother her smile. "And we can't wait for you all to meet them."


	32. Chapter 32

With an aching back and boredom leaving her feeling as though she wants to claw her eyeballs out, Kate finds herself wandering along Trinity Inlet with no plan but to kill time. If it were a weekend, Kate would have dragged Zee to the shops or something, but it's a typical Wednesday afternoon and Mackenzie is, according to the timetable Kate had finally deciphered after weeks, cloistered up in Biology.

"X? I mean Boss? I mean... uh... Ma'am?" Kate looks up at 2Dads, her lips curling at the sight of the young sailor walking towards her, hat clipped to his DPNUs.

"I've told you before, you  _can_ call me Kate." She points out, one hand absent-mindedly kneading her lower back.

"But it's weird." 2Dads protests, running a hand through his hair. "It's like-"

"If you compare me to your mother one more time-" Kate warns, but she smiles nonetheless at the guilty look on his face that tells her he was thinking exactly what she thought he was. "Is  _Hammersley_ back in?"

"Nah." 2Dads crinkles his nose. "Got lumbered with steaming party. Just dropped off an FFV. Half a day with Robert. How fun." He turns back towards the base, pondering aloud. "What do they do with the FFVs anyway?"

A sudden twinge of pain distracts Kate from the rest of his words. "Hey," She begins lamely at 2Dads' questioning stare. "So I think I'm in labour?" Kate touches one hand to her stomach, tipping her head. "Actually, yeah, I'm going to say I'm  _definitely_ in labour."

2Dads pales so fast Kate fears he's going to faint. "Shit. Well we- I've got to call Dutchy. Do I call an ambulance? What do I do?"

Kate frowns, cradling her belly with one hand. "Well I might drive home and grab my stuff. Then when the contractions get closer I can head to the hospital." 2Dads looks incredulously at her, as though she's just suggested  _he_ deliver her babies.

"Are you kidding?" 2Dads' voice is loud enough to attract the eye of several passers by. One of the men approaches them.

"Are you okay here, Miss?" He asks, and Kate has to stifle any objections she has to being called  _miss._

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just..." She gestures towards 2Dads. "My father here is a little dramatic."

2Dads rolls his eyes, but lowers his voice all the same as they both watch the man go. "You're not driving!" He picks up the argument immediately. "I'll... I'll drive. Give me your keys." 2Dads lunges forwards and snatches them from her hand. "Where's your car?"

Kate takes a step back, resisting the urge to call the man back and have him throw 2Dads in the drink. "Have you even got a licence?" Kate challenges.

"Yes!" 2Dads groans. "Well... have my P's. Never did my blacks. I... I just have no car. Come on! How are you this calm?"

"I don't know. Why are you so panicked?" Kate turns the question back at him, rolling her eyes once more.

"Because I am not delivering your children and if anything happens to you or the babies Dutchy will kill me."

Deciding it will be easier to accept the lift home, Kate holds a hand out in a dramatic flourish towards the spot where she'd parked her car. "Well, my car is over there-"

2Dads turns a critical eye towards the direction she'd just pointed, as though trying to gauge the distance. "Can you... should you be walking?"

"2Dads!"

"I can carry you-"

"Um, no and  _no._ " Kate leads the way towards the car. "And don't change my stations!"

* * *

Once again, 2Dads takes Kate's keys off her - house keys this time - and leads the way into her house. "By all means, come in." Kate grumbles under her breath, moving into the kitchen and dragging a hand over her tired face. "Look, you can go. I'm going to have a bath."

"A bath?" Kate wonders whether her kids will come out of the womb rolling their eyes. "You can't... what if you pop the kid?"

"2Dads, my contractions are still fifteen minutes apart and I am sore. I'm having a bath."

"And if something happens? No." 2Dads folds his arms tight, and if he wasn't so damn annoying, Kate would have admired the wisdom and perseverance he's showing. "I'm staying."

"First labour is long, 2Dads." Kate picks up one of the many pregnancy books Sofia had bought her and tosses it in his general direction. It hits the floor with a dull  _thwump._

"Not always." 2Dads raises his hand. "Yeah, my mum always tells me I was in such a hurry she had a contraction and within an hour I fell out onto the kitchen floor."

"That explains a lot." Kate mumbles under her breath. "Look, I appreciate your concern, but all I want is a bath and some ice water."

"I'll get the water." 2Dads leaps to his feet. "And I really think you should at least call the hospital. There was this girl I was dating- uh, she thought she was pregnant. Turns out she was just... you know... late. But I did a lot of research."

Kate pales and 2Dads dashes forwards as though worried she's about to faint. "Bucket. Under sink." Kate manages to squeeze out. He twists around, rummaging underneath the sink and managing to pull out a bucket just in time for Kate to vomit spectacularly into it.

"Are... you okay?" 2Dads begins lamely, tugging her hair from her face. She pulls out of his grasp.

"Just nauseaus.  _Don't_ touch that. I can empty it." She protests as 2Dads makes to empty the bucket. "I can do that. And then I'm having a bath." Kate says again. "Stay if you want. There's Netflix on the telly-"

"I'll mute it so I can hear if you need help-"

Kate goes to yell and then forces herself to calm down, knowing he's only trying to help. "Sure. Whatever."

* * *

Kate has barely twenty minutes of peace before a knock sounds out at the bathroom door and 2Dads' anxious voice calls through. "Are you alright in there? You need anything?"

"2Dads!" Kate's impatience is worsened with another contraction. "Geez you're infuriating."

"I just think that the bath isn't the best place for you at the moment. What if... you know... you get stuck?"

"I'm not going to bloody get stuck! I know you're trying to help, but in the nicest possible way, bugger off. Please!"

* * *

"Ah, 2Dads, what are you doing?"

"Mackenzie!" 2Dads looks as relieved as if he's just found water in the middle of a desert as he dashes towards the teenager, staggering slightly as he returns to his feet after sitting in the hallway for the last half an hour.

"Uh, what are you doing in Kate's room? Staking out her bathroom no less?"

2Dads starts to gabble immediately. "I drove Kate home because she's in labour, but she doesn't want to go to the hospital yet, and she kept telling me to go but I wasn't leaving her alone. She's in the bath." He adds.

"Right." Mackenzie moves to open the bathroom door then hesitates, turning pointedly towards 2Dads. "No offence, but Kate probably doesn't want you to see her naked-"

"Oh, shit yeah. Okay. I'll... um... make sandwiches." Apparently deciding that sandwiches is an alright price to pay for 2Dads leaving, Mackenzie nods. Making sure the young sailor is out of side, she knocks and opens the bathroom door just enough to poke her head through and be heard.

"Kate?"

"You can look. I'm wearing clothes." Mackenzie turns in time to see Kate breathing through a contraction, her bra and underwear soaked through with bath water. "Just in case 2Dads broke down the door."

Mackenzie's mouth twitches. "Was that likely?"

Kate just scoffs. Above the water, her stomach is like an island. Mackenzie watches, fascinated, until the contraction ends. "I'm fine. Really. But 2Dads was there and insisted on driving me home and then apparently staying. But he's been driving me mad." She turns to Mackenzie. "So I might be stuck."

"Stuck?"

"Well, I can't get up. I just wasn't going to admit that to 2Dads, but I might need some help."

"Right." Mackenzie takes a step closer. "Well, I might not be the best person to help but..." She places a hand under each of her arms and helps to pull her to her feet, wrapping a towel around her before she can even ask.

* * *

"2Dads, you're still here? And you're... putting up a cubby house? You know they generally start out pretty small? Like I don't feel they'll be using this fort any time soon." Wincing, Kate sucks in a breath. "Fuck. Son of a bitch."

2Dads thinks his ears might just be ringing. "Ma'am?"

Kate waves an impatient hand. "It's a contraction. I'm not dying."

"I've just never heard you swear before." He observes, deftly screwing two pieces of wood together. "And honestly," He gestures towards the mess of flatpack. "It was something to do. I called Sofia-"

"How?" Kate interjects.

"Well, I Facebook messaged Stella, who messaged Gracie who gave me Sofia's number." He explains, as though it's the most logical explanation. "She's on her way now."

Kate can't deny that Sofia will be some comfort. "Why do you have Stella on Facebook?" She enquires.

"Well, we were seriously vibing and I was going to ask her out-"

"She's a lesbian." Kate rolls her eyes, unable to withhold her laughter. "Seriously, 2Dads."

2Dads' jaw drops. "Oh, so her and Gracie are together! That makes so much sense."

"You are the worst." Kate rolls her eyes again, before glancing at her phone for the millionth time. "Dutchy's phone must be out of range. I don't want to call  _Hammersley_ and have him worrying."

"Well, they should be in at around 2000 hours. They were apprehending a mother ship first. Look, I can drive Sofia over when she gets home if you need to-"

"I don't need the hospital yet!" Kate sighs and manoeuvres herself onto the lounge. "I am going to rest in my own home."

"Well, do you... do you want anything?" 2Dads stammers.

"Vodka." Kate deadpans.

2Dads gives a nervous laugh. "When do you think you'll go to the hospital?"

"2Dads, seriously, there's no need to be so worried. This is completely normal."

"You swearing like a trucker does not feel normal."

"Well, think of what's coming out." Kate rolls her eyes as 2Dads squeaks. "Are you angling for godfather?"

2Dads has the good grace to look offended. "I'm here because you told me you were in labour!"

"Well, you don't need to stress so much. Geez. You're stressing me out."

"I'm sorry. I... I just don't like seeing people in pain. Are you sure you-"

"If you say hospital one more time-" Kate warns, jabbing a hand in his general direction.

2Dads swallows hard. "Well, what if I went and got Sally? I could watch Chloe and you could have her-"

Kate lets out a snort of laughter. "The last time you babysat Chloe, you drew prison tattoos on her with eyeliner and put her in a onesie done up like a prisoner."

"Classic." 2Dads grins. "Hey, I should have gotten two for these girls." He tugs his phone towards him.

"Don't even think about it." Kate turns to the TV. "So what are we watching?"

2Dads turns around as Mackenzie reenters the room, changed out of her school uniform, and 2Dads rounds on Mackenzie, gesturing towards Kate. "Are you okay with this? Shouldn't she be at a hospital?"

Mackenzie shrugs. "She knows her own body. Besides," She gestures to the paused and muted TV. "I like this one."

"And you're not leaving half a flatpack on my floor." Kate adds. "Seriously 2Dads. I will tell you when it gets too much. Okay?"

* * *

"How far apart were those ones?" Mackenzie enquires as Kate paces around the room and scrapes her hair into a bun. 2Dads had pulled out some pasta and was now cooking, although judging by his curses and muttering, Kate is not too optimistic about the taste.

"Eight minutes." She groans, just as a loud hissing tells her that the pasta has boiled over again. Glancing in the kitchen, she sees 2Dads' frantic face.

"I can fix that!" He calls out. "I... one super dooper meal coming up for Mackenzie."

Kate can't supress the smile as she catches sight of an uneasy looking Mackenzie. Flashing her a sympathetic look, Kate adds, "The walking helps. What time is it?"

"Just past six o'clock." Mackenzie answers, just as a knock sounds out through the house. "Oh, the door. I'll get it."

A moment later Sofia is hurrying into the room and dashing straight to Kate, resting one hand on Kate's belly and the other on her forehead. "Oh, darling. Traffic was horrific. I got here as soon as I could. How are you?"

"I'm fine." Kate says, more for 2Dads benefit than for Sofia's.

Sofia turns to 2Dads, a curious look on her face. "You're the boy that was trying to hit on Stella? 2Mums or something?"

"2Dads." He answers, just as Mackenzie erupts into laughter.

"2Dads, you tried to hit on Stella? Oh man!" She slaps a hand to her leg, just as 2Dads tips some pasta into a bowl and passes it to Mackenzie. "Hey, this is surprisingly good! You want some Kate? Sofia?"

Both women shake their heads, and Sofia makes to help Kate sit down. A moment later, though, Sofia pulls her hand away. "Kate, honey, when did your waters break?"

"What?" Kate turns to the lounge and sees the damp spot. "I... didn't know they had? Isn't it supposed to be..." She makes an exaggerated whooshing noise and flourishes with her hands.

"No, not always, love. Look, I think we're going to head to the hospital. Dylan can meet us there."

"I can drive him after." 2Dads volunteers, already starting on the washing up.

Mackenzie frowns. "You haven't got a license." She points out.

Kate turns her gaze on him, feeling furious. "You told me you had!"

"Well, I'm pretty sure I said I  _had_ one. Not that I  _have_ one."

"That's not what you said." Kate groans, pulling herself towards the stairs. "Let me get changed first."

* * *

After two more hours of pain, Kate is feeling her strength wain. She feels exhausted, wrung out, like she's been running all day, or standing up for days. All she knows is she's never been this tired, never been in this much pain. "It's okay. You're doing so well." Sofia smooths Kate's hair, and there's something maternal in her movements. For a moment, Kate allows herself to close her eyes and imagine it's Debbie doing it instead. But the image doesn't quite gel in her mind, and she opens her eyes in time to see Sofia holding out a plastic cup. "Do you want some water?"

"No. No water." She shakes her head, her stomach rolling with nausea again. She's tempted to ask for a bucket, but doesn't think she can muster up the energy to be sick. "I need Dylan. Have you managed to contact him?"

"2Dads has caught a taxi down to the base now." Sofia assures her, securing Kate's falling hair again. "I'm sure they'll be in port really soon." She smiles at Kate. "Did you want to try walking again?"

Kate wants to shout that she has no idea what to do, but she's interrupted by the doctor's arrival.

"Mrs Mulholland?" Both Kate and Sofia look up, and he hastens to correct himself. "Uh... Kate?"

"Yes." Kate raises a hand in lazy greeting, unable to muster anything more.

"Well, we're going to start your epidural now, so you should feel some pain relief. And we're going to move you to an operating room. Standard procedure with multiple births."

"Are the babies okay?" Kate begs.

"They're in a good position and heart-rate seems normal so at the moment, everything looks good." He smiles encouragingly at her. "So, we're going to get going-"

"Uh... my husband. I wanted to wait for him." Kate twists around to face the door, as though expecting him to walk through at any minute.

"Kate, we need to do this sooner rather than later."

"Dylan will be here soon." Sofia assures Kate.

"I'm here!" A voice calls out and Kate feels a smile split her face.

"Dutchy!" She holds out her arms and he wraps her in a hug so tight she might have broken ribs. "I'm so glad you're here."

"Wow." Dutchy grins, gesturing towards her belly. "This is really happening?"

"Yeah." Kate nods, feeling the start of a contraction again. "This is definitely happening."

"I love you?"

"You'd better." Kate quips, as Dutchy rubs her back. "Urgh. I was really mean to 2Dads." Kate groans.

"He'll get over it." Dutchy assures her.

"I'll wait outside." Sofia rubs Kate's shoulder one more time before moving to the door. "Kate, you're going to be fine. But right now, there's a bunch of rowdy sailors in the hallway that need wrangling."

And Kate's laugh turns into a cry of pain as she squeezes Dutchy's hand.

* * *

It lasts an eternity, and despite her high pain threshold, Kate can't stop the occasional moan of pain from escaping her. "I love you. I love you." Dutchy whispers in her ear, letting her crush his hand with hers and rubbing circles on her back whenever he feels she needs it.

She finds herself thinking about stupid stuff, like whether or not Netflix was still playing, or what time it is and whether Zee has done any homework for school tomorrow. "Come on, Kate. She gets a pass for school tomorrow, don't you think?" Dutchy grins when she confides this in him.

Kate's response is to curse under her breath. "Hon, I'm sleeping tomorrow. This is really hurting."

"Worse than getting shot?"

"Yes. And worse than being caught in a fire."

"When were you caught in a fire?" Dutchy frowns.

"Oh, before your time. Oil tanker blew up. I kind of got caught in the middle."

"What kind of hobbies do you both have?" The midwife demands.

"Navy." They both say simply.

And then the words come that Kate has been both dreading and praying for. "Push." And suddenly, it's coming at her from both sides, with Dutchy whispering in her ear and the midwife talking and maybe voices in Kate's own imagination, all chanting at her to  _push push._

"Baby 1 is here." Kate lets out a laugh as a cry fills the delivery room. "Dad, would you like to cut the cord?"

"Oh my... yeah." He turns to Kate. "Did you bring the nail polish? Katie, she's perfect." Kate smiles softly as she falls back against the pillows.

"Not over yet." She groans.

* * *

"Mackenzie McGregor?" Zee jerks awake from her half-doze as she turns to the doctor who'd just called her name. Within a matter of seconds, she's wide awake and scrabbling to her feet.

"Is Kate okay? The babies? Urgh, what time is it?" She fumbles desperately with her phone in her pocket and sees it's just past 11.30pm. "Where's Kate?"

"Come with me." The doctor grins, and, throwing a glance back at the assorted  _Hammersley_ and Mulhollands, Zee follows.

Kate is sitting propped up, holding one of the babies, with Dutchy beside her holding the other. "Awwww!" Zee rushes forwards to peer over Kate's shoulder. "They're absolutely perfect. I... and they're healthy?"

"Yeah." Kate grins, not taking her eyes off them. "Yeah, they're healthy. They're perfect."

"I... when were they born? Have you got names?"

"Well, this is Corinne Mackenzie, born at 2254 hours," Kate smiles at the baby in her arms before nodding at the baby Dutchy is holding. "And this is Edie Sofia, born at 2313 hours."

"Mackenzie?" Zee repeats, as though not quite sure she's heard correctly. "You... you named her after me?"

"Of course." Dutchy chimes in. "Without you, we wouldn't be a family. Want to hold?"

"They're so small." Mackenzie can't stop the squeaking in her voice as she takes Edie from Dutchy. "Hi Edie." She whispers, brushing a thumb over the baby's soft head. "I'm your auntie." 


	33. Chapter 33

"Mackenzie, did you draw on Edie?!" Kate's voice rings out through the house as she clutches Edie to her chest and heads into Mackenzie's room. As she pokes her head around the doorway, she spots Mackenzie cross-legged on her bed, typing on her laptop with Corinne lying neatly in her lap. Zee looks up as Kate enters the room, putting a finger to her lips.

"Shh! She's just gone to sleep!" Mackenzie whispers. Kate points towards Edie's foot, rolling her eyes, and Mackenzie bites her lip, before adding, "Yes, I... I couldn't tell them apart. It's easier than checking their bellies for Corinne's birthmark freckle."

"Mackenzie!"

"It's non-toxic texta, and it's the smallest amount." She holds up a bottle sitting next to her, obviously trying to dodge the argument. "Corrie only had 80 mils."

"That's fine. She had a fair bit this morning." Kate rakes an eye over the text books spread out over Mackenzie's mattress, like some sort of scholarly parody of a summoning pentagram. "Sorry, you should be working. I didn't mean you had to feed her too."

Zee shrugs. "Nah, it's all good. You had your hands full, and Corrie was content to just lay here. Actually think the sound of keys comforted her. You tried that before?" She ploughs on without waiting for an answer. "Anyway, how's Edie?"

Kate glances down at the baby in her arms, tears still clinging to her tiny eyelashes, and brushes a finger over her cheek. "Still grizzly from the needles yesterday. She won't go back down for a sleep but she seems to have settled for now. They weren't kidding about that six weeks' growth-spurt. All they've wanted to do is feed, I've had to express just to keep them both satisfied." She trails off, looking between her girls. "I can't believe they're six weeks already.  _But_ it means we can go and see Daddy at the wharf today!"

"So you're still intent on taking them?" Mackenzie grins, her smile widening.

"I have not left the house in weeks, aside from the docs yesterday. We're going out!" Kate sniffs herself and winces. "I just need a shower first." She glances towards Edie and wonders whether she'll be content enough to lay in her bouncer in the bathroom again.

Mackenzie on the other hand, holds out her arms, careful not to disturb Corinne. "Well, give me Edes and I can watch her. If you throw the playmat up here, she'll be content to watch herself in the mirror for a little. Little narcissist."

"Nah, it's okay. I'll see if she'll sit in the bouncer-"

"She screamed the house down last time you tried that, and you only managed to shave one armpit. Which, as a sidenote, you should totally amend today. Give me my niece and go and have a shower." She claps her hands, still managing to convey impatience despite her efforts not to wake up the sleeping Corinne.

"Geez. Alright!" Kate hands over Edie, and moves towards the twins' room, intent on collecting the playmat.

"And wash your hair. You look like birds will start landing there soon." Mackenzie adds, as Kate rests it on the bed next to Zee.

"As charming as ever!" Kate calls back, trying to untangle her hair tie from the knot it had found itself in.

* * *

"You sure you're going to be okay?" Mackenzie frowns, peering more than a little worriedly as Kate wrestles with the double pram to get it out the front door, cradling a half-awake Corinne in her arms, one hand shielding the baby's face from the sun.

"Yes." Kate nods, successfully getting it out the door with just a little banging and scraping, and moving back towards the mat to pick up Edie. "I just... hate this thing."

"And are you sure you're going to walk?" There's something in Mackenzie's gaze that makes Kate feel like the child, rather than the adult.

She runs a hand over her dress, trying to look as authoritative as possible. "Yeah, I am." Kate lowers Edie into the front-facing seat in the pram and buckles her in before turning back to Mackenzie, rolling her eyes at the panicked look still on the teenager.

"Maybe I should come too?"

"You are going to the library to study! It's just a walk to the marina, Zee. We'll be fine!"

"It's half an hour each way! And Kate, when was the last time you actually walked more than to the car?" She raises an eyebrow, as though she's just delivered an indisputable argument.

"A while." Kate agrees. "Which is  _why_  I want to get out." Kate sighs, tugging a hand through her hair and marvelling at how soft it feels. Just how greasy had it been before? "Look, I know you're worried, but... we'll be okay. You do what you need to do."

Kate scoops up the nappy bag and throws it in the tray at the bottom as Mackenzie starts to list items. "Got the cover? Hats? Water? Nappies? Wipes?"

"I've got everything, Mackenzie!" Kate puts her hand on the stroller and turns it towards the driveway.

"Ah, Kate?" Kate turns around to see Mackenzie, still holding Corinne. " _Almost_  everything, Sis. Almost everything."

Kate freezes for a moment, then curses under her breath and steps back to collect her oldest daughter. "This..." She begins, strapping Corinne into her seat. "This is no reflection upon my abilities."

Mackenzie smiles sweetly up at her. "I know."

* * *

"Look, girls! It's Daddy's boat." She crinkles her nose. "Used to be Mummy's." She turns the pram around, making sure to lock the wheels before taking one hand off the handle to shield her eyes from the sun. In truth, neither baby seems particularly interested in their surroundings. Edie's eyes are fluttering - Kate guesses she's almost asleep, and Corinne is peering curiously at Kate, opening and closing her fingers in a seemingly random way. "Well, I'm excited." Kate murmurs, lowering herself to Corinne's level, so she can peer closer at her. "Daddy's missed you both. Three weeks is a long time. But he gets to stay with us for one whole week, so that's exciting. And we get to meet Pop and... Sofia. Who is yet to decide a name she wants you both to call her." Kate smiles at Corinne before moving to check on Edie. As per Kate's prediction, the baby is now fast asleep, her tufty blonde hair blowing slightly in the breeze.

They'd grown so much since their birth, and Kate is torn between pride at her daughters' achievements - first smiles, their gorgeous cooing and gurgling - and sadness that Dutchy has missed so much. "Your Daddy is going to be so excited to see you both." Kate whispers to Corinne, earning a smile in return. Kate watches as the  _Hammersley_ pulls into the dock, and the flurry of activity as the gangway is lowered. "What do you say, girls? Do we want to go on?" But a moment later, Kate catches sight of Dutchy dashing off the ship, pausing only to salute Thor before tearing over to the spot where Kate and the twins are.

"There are my girls!" He grins, planting a kiss on Kate's cheeks before peering in at Corinne and the now-sleeping Edie. "They've grown up so much!" Although there's a wide smile on Dutchy's face, there's also the twinge of regret that Kate had predicted, though it quickly fades as he scoops up Corinne and presses a kiss to her forehead. "I've missed you so much, Corrie." Then he turns to Kate. "And I have missed you too." He presses a quick kiss to Kate's lips; nothing too public, but enough to show his feelings, before turning his attention back to Corinne.

"Hey, it's  _Thunder_ and  _Lightning!"_ 2Dads calls as he too runs towards the pram, stopping short and moving his face so that he's at eye level with Corinne. "Kak moi malen'kiye yezhiki?" He grins.

Kate peers at him intently. "You know, it always takes me by surprise when I hear you speaking Russian. And why do you call them hedgehogs?"

2Dads shrugs, letting Corinne grab his finger with her tiny fist. "Hey, hedgehogs are gorgeous. As are these beautiful girls! Right, Corinne?" He glances up at Kate. "This is Corinne, right?"

"Yes." Kate nods, looking impressed. "Ah, how did you..."

"Intuition." 2Dads grins, flashing a cheeky wink. Kate raises an eyebrow. "Look, I guessed. It was fifty-fifty, hey? Speaking of which, there's a poker tournament at the pub tonight and I'm off. But there's a BBQ at the park tomorrow. Bit of footy and some food. You guys coming?"

Dutchy wraps a hand around Kate's waist. "Ah, we might have to give it a miss. We're driving up to see my family tomorrow."

"Aww, I'll miss you, won't I?" He coos at Corinne. "Yeah, I will." He gives Corinne's hand a tiny shake, and then turns to Kate and Dutchy. "Well, the money doesn't make itself. I will see you all later." He starts to walk down the wharf, then stops, turning back. "And give Edie a cuddle from me too. Actually, you should read them my book! And tell them Uncle 2Dads loves them!"

Kate watches him go with a mixture of incredulity and amusement. "He sounds so mature, and he's so sweet with them. And then he blows his money on poker."

"Ah, kids..." Dutchy shakes his head in a mock-sombre way, putting Corinne back into the pram and hoisting his sea bag over his shoulder. "Eh, what can you do?" He grins at Kate. "Let's go home."

They fall into step, chatting idly about how the twins were going and Dutchy's latest patrol, pausing only when Kate sees a familiar head outside a cafe. "Zee!" She grins, and Mackenzie turns around, her books stacked neatly on the table.

Mackenzie smiles and makes her way over to them. "Hey guys. Hi Dutchy. Good patrol?"

"Not bad." He smiles, wrapping her in a hug. "Good to be back though. But I know Auntie Zee's been looking after my girls so-"

"Auntie?" A voice repeats. All three of them look up as a fourth person joins their group, and Kate recognises Mackenzie's friend Tash. "Why's she auntie? Shouldn't it just be sis or something?" Both Kate and Dutchy exchange glances.

"Uh, slip of the tongue. Sorry?" Dutchy begins. "I'm always thinking auntie for some-"

"No." Mackenzie cuts in, and her voice is slightly louder than perhaps she'd intended, because Willow approaches too, resting a hand on Zee's shoulder. "Ah, I should have told you both the truth from the start. But you assumed and it was easier..." She takes a deep breath. "Kate is my sister. Not my mother. Our mother... she died just over a year ago. My father moves around a lot and Kate... she and Dutchy opened up their home for me."

"Zee..." Willow exhales.

"So... the twins you guys assume are my sisters are actually my beautiful nieces." She scoops up Corinne, almost absentmindedly, tears trailing down her cheeks. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. It was just..."

"You don't have to apologise, Zee." Tash cuts in. "Never. You weren't ready before. And that's fine. We're still best friends."

"And from what it looks like, you're the best auntie ever." Willow adds.

"She is." Dutchy and Kate chorus in unison.

Kate watches the scene, seeking out Dutchy's hand, thoroughly grateful that her sister has such great friends.

* * *

" _When I was one, I hurt my thumb, and I ran away to sea!"_ Kate hovers in the doorway, watching Dutchy singing to Corinne, who is kicking her legs and gurgling, smiling a gummy smile. " _I climbed aboard a pirate ship and the captain said to me..._ Oh, hey!" He grins as he finishes fastening Corinne's nappy and picks her up, still kicking happily. "Uncle 2Dads taught me the pirate song, didn't he!" He directs his question towards Corinne, grinning broadly.

"Where does he find this stuff?" Kate frowns, genuinely at awe with 2Dads and his constant finding of things for them. Despite having already given them a collection of clothing, the cubby house and books at the baby shower, as well as more clothing and toys after they were born, Dutchy had undone his sea bag and extracted another bag containing matching red polka-dotted dresses with a hedgehog on the front. Kate had made a mental note to put them in the dresses when they drop Dutchy back to  _Hammersley,_ just so the young sailor didn't feel his efforts weren't appreciated. And Kate had to admit, 2Dads did have a knack for picking adorable clothing.

"YouTube, probably." Dutchy shrugs, before greeting Edie. "Hello, Edes. Uh, why's your toe purple?"

"Mackenzie and her textas again." Kate tries to look stern but fails, rolling her eyes. "She reckons it's too much hassle to look for Corrie's birthmark. Says she's ninety percent sure she can tell them apart, but she's still paranoid about mixing them up. Ah, can we swap kids? I'm gonna feed Corrie now."

"Sure." Kate hands over Edie, before scooping Corinne up from the change table. "Do you need a hand?"

Kate grins. "Well, unfortunately, you don't exactly have the right equipment." She winks. "And, anyway, it's your first evening in port. What do you want to do?"

He leans closer, so that his lips are just next to her ear. "Take a guess..." Dutchy shrugs in a nonchalant way, then grins. "I want to be with my family. I don't care about anything else, Kate."

* * *

"Is that Edes crying?" Dutchy's voice is slightly muffled by the pillow as Kate stares blearily around, looking for the clock. 0109 hours.

"Nah, it's Corinne." Kate answers. "She's slightly more high-pitched." She exhales for a moment, then pulls herself to her feet. Dutchy makes to follow but Kate shakes her head, lowering her voice as they walk past Zee's room. "It's okay. She probably just needs a feed."

"Kate, I can help."

"Well, seeing as you don't have the equipment, that's going to be hard."

"You haven't expressed any?"

"Not today, we've been out." Kate shakes her head, unhooking her singlet top in a daze and picking up Corinne. "She'll be right. It's okay. Go back to bed."

* * *

"You know, I want to help, right?" Dutchy murmurs as Kate settles back into bed half an hour later. "I know I'm away a lot but... I want to help."

"I know." Kate murmurs distractedly. "It's just... look, it's all so new but I've got this... crazy routine in my head and it's hard to put it into words. I'm not trying to shut you out. I'm just..." She lets out a sigh.

"Look, I know I can't feed them unless you express milk beforehand. I just mean... I don't know. I can do other stuff. You're running around the house like a headless chook and I feel like all I'm doing is sitting on the lounge."

"Sorry." Kate whispers. "It's... it's going to take a bit of time for us both to get this right."

"I know." Dutchy hesitates, threading his fingers through hers. "I just... I never thought it would be so hard, being away from them."

"I know." Kate nods. "But... we're going to make it, Dutchy. We're going to do this."

* * *

"I think we need a bigger car." Kate observes, peering behind her and wincing at the sight of Mackenzie squeezed in between two baby capsules. "You right there, Zee?"

"I'm alright. It's not much further. And... are you seriously doing that here?" Mackenzie frowns as Kate tugs a breast pump from the bag at her feet.

"I'll put a cover over." Kate defends. The embarrassment had long since passed, and now all she was thinking of was the fact that she was sore. "I just thought we'd be there by now."

"That thing sounds archaic." Dutchy muses as he glances over at Kate for a moment as she drapes a shawl over her.

"Either that, or we stop." Kate says, wincing as she tries to position it. "Because, I'm sore. And I really don't want to leak at your parents house."

"You can leak?" Dutchy frowns.

"Yeah. Which was not fun at the doctors when they cried after their needles, I'll tell you that." Kate readjusts her top slightly, before jabbing a finger blindly behind her in the direction of Mackenzie. "And don't think I didn't notice there's more texta on Edie today."

"I thought it would help the grandparents." Mackenzie defends, a note of sarcasm in her voice. "And anyway, she likes the feeling. What  _are_ Sofia and Harrison calling themselves, anyway?"

"Uh... well Sofia can't decide. She's torn between Nanna and Grandma. Harrison has decided on Pop." Kate turns around once more as a light crying breaks the conversation up. "Oh, Edie..." Kate reaches blindly behind her and rubs a hand over Edie's foot. "Maybe they're too young to be in the car this long?" Kate frowns, turning to Dylan. "Maybe we should..."

"We're almost there." Dutchy assures her, squeezing Kate's hand. "Okay? We'll be there in less than ten minutes and then they can come out."

"Okay." Kate frowns, before glaring down at her chest. "I feel like a dairy cow." She mutters.

* * *

"There's my babies!" Sofia squeals as she runs down the driveway with more speed than one would technically expect from a woman of her age. "Oh, they've grown so much. And what beautiful outfits. So... uh..."

"Corinne is in the yellow, and Edie is in the purple." Kate answers before Sofia can ask, lifting Corinne into her arms and allowing Edie to be held by Sofia. "Uh, they're both a little grizzly. Due for a feed actually."

"Well, come inside and we'll find you somewhere to sit. Dylan, what are you carrying? I told you all no food!"

"Well, Mackenzie insisted on making apple crumble. And then I have the usual. Nappies, wipes, bottles, wraps. We've got the works here." He shoulders the bag and grins at his mother.

"Well," Sofia grins between them, "Let's get you inside!"

* * *

"I just think that now we're at a slight disadvantage now." Tom complains, gesturing towards the babies who are now making their rounds around the room. At the moment, Harrison is holding Edie, and Corinne has been snagged by Donna, Cleo coming to snuggle up to Kate. "I mean, you pop twin girls and you already had Gracie snagging a lesbian, which I must add I'm  _not_  opposed to. Free love and all that. I just mean, your girls team is a bit more populated."

Gracie scoffs. "You think Corrie and Edes are gonna be sorting Skittles in six months time?" She scoffs. "Come on! One - You settle down and have some boys if you're so worried about the state of the Mulholland name. Two - I'm adjudicator this year anyway, so I'm not playing. And three -  _snagging a lesbian_? Real PC."

Tom gives an exaggerated shrug. "All I'm saying is, you gotta have some boys next Kate. Or, you know," He turns to face Zee. "Mackenzie's gotta get a boyfriend."

"She's fourteen!" Kate protests. "You're not pimping out my girl for the sake of your Christmas games! And I've literally just pushed out twins. I'm in no hurry to go through that again."

"Tom, shut up." Stella crumples a piece of paper and lobs it at him.

He picks it up and throws it back, but it misses and hits Corinne, who starts to wail. "I didn't mean-" Tom begins, but Kate quails him with a look. "Sorry, Kate. Sorry... Edie?"

"It's Corinne, you idiot." Donna grinds out, rolling her eyes. "Honestly, Tom."

"They're bloody identical!" He protests, making to move towards the baby but seeming to think better of it.

"Well, Edie's got a purple toe for some reason." Donna muses wryly. "Also, you're an idiot."

"For that, you're on washing up." Harrison calls across the table. "No arguments, young man. Hurting my granddaughter deserves a penalty."

Tom nods, uncharacteristically seriously, before turning to Kate, looking anxious. "Corinne okay? I swear, Kate, I didn't hurt her though. Did I?"

"No, she just got a fright." Kate assures him, knowing he meant no harm. "And sorry, but we're not planning on any more any time soon. You might have to produce the boys yourself."

"Ha! That'd require someone other than Mrs Palmer and her five daughters." Gracie quips. Tom flips her off again.

"I don't get it?" Harrison frowns, causing most of the adults to chuckle.

"You should look it up, Uncle Harrison." Tom flashes an innocent smile. "See what kind of filth your daughter comes out with."

Harrison chooses to ignore that comment, frowning slightly as he apparently casts his mind back. "Tom, what about that blonde lady you were talking to at the wedding." Harrison waves a hand in the air, as though the name he's searching for can be physically caught. "Ah, blast. Can't remember her name. But you were standing around talking about the horses for a long time. You seemed to get along well with her."

"Oh, yeah!" Stella chimes in. "The one with the dark purple dress. M... M something? Marlene?"

"Who are you..." Kate frowns, then her eyes widen as she too casts her mind back to their wedding day. "Maxine?!" She finishes incredulously. "You like Maxine?"

Tom flushes, looking shifty. "I showed her the horses. That was literally it."

"That's it! Maxine!" Stella frowns, tapping away at her phone. "Maxine White?" She nods at Kate. "I'm just stalking your facebook. Ooh, she's pretty. Born in 1975 so that makes her 43. Probably wouldn't be popping out kids though. Oh, she has a son!" She turns to Tom, who nods in a way that tells them all this is not new information to him. "Well, she might not want more kids." She turns to Kate. "How old's her son? He looks about 18?"

"21, I'm pretty sure. Or 22?" Kate looks up at Tom. "I can message her if you-"

"I can sort my own love life out!" Tom rolls his eyes. "Geez, you guys are nosy. We just talked..."

"And danced. There were some serious dancing vibes there, Son. And she was fascinated when you were showing her the horses." Luke chimes in, patting his son on the shoulder. "When you've seen enough of love-"

"Oh, hush!" Tom drags his hand over his face.

"I sent you her number." Kate grins, as Tom's phone chimes. "Just in case."

"Call her now!" Stella giggles, leaning closer and making to scoop up Tom's face, only to have it snatched from her grasp by its owner. "Come on! I need to see how this pans out. Show us your heterosexual power moves."

"Just text her." Gracie urges. "Say ' _hey, it's Tom. We met at the wedding. Kate gave me your number and I was wondering if you'd like to catch up for coffee?'_ "

"I don't like coffee." Kate lets out a snort of laughter at just how childlike Tom sounds with that comment, like a kid refusing broccoli with their bottom lip stuck out.

" _She_  does." Kate points out. "Suggest dinner, then?"

"But dinner means sex." Stella points out flatly.

"No, it doesn't." Harrison scoffs, looking perplexed between the adults in the room.

"Yeah, it does." Agree Gracie, Dutchy and Kate in unison.

Harrison looks aghast as he turns between his two children. "So what about all those times you went out to dinner as a teenager?"

"Dad, that ship sailed a long time ago." Gracie rolls her eyes, waving away her father's shock and embarrassment with a hand and turning to Tom. "Back to Maxine-"

Tom wrinkles his nose. "No, let's talk about Gracie's virginity instead."

Kate shakes her head. "Oh no, Mackenzie's too young for this conversation!"

"She's fourteen." Tom turns to Kate. "How old were  _you_? Fifteen?" Uncomfortably aware that he's not too far off with his guess, Kate feels a surge of relief as Dutchy cuts in.

"Hey! Quit stalling. Come on, man. Text Maxine, or Kate's calling her."

"What if I don't want to?"

Kate frowns, her hand hovering over the 'call' button under Maxine's name. "You or me, buddy."

"Fine. But I'm going outside to call her. I'm not having you all eavesdropping." He scoops up his own phone, turning towards outside.

"Don't think this gets you out of washing up!" Luke calls after him. As soon as he's gone, there's a scramble to move to the window.

"Oh, bless him, he's pacing." Gracie coos.

"Are you guys all going to watch him?" Kate frowns, hovering nearer to the table.

"Of course." Gracie shrugs. "Anyone lipread?"

Kate rolls her eyes but heads to the window and begins to translate. "Tom... wedding... met at drinks... whores?" She blinks in confusion, and feels several confused faces on her. "Oh, no,  _horse_ , sorry. Uh... drinks sometime? Whoop!" Kate ducks suddenly as he turns his gaze towards the house. A moment later Tom flips them off and turns around, his back firmly blocking any more lip reading from view.

Kate's phone beeps, and she smirks as she sees it's from Maxine.

_**Help! on the phone to Tom from your wedding. can't figure out if he's asking me out or grilling me about good bars in cairns?** _

Kate snorts with laughter, permitting Gracie to read over her shoulder.

 _ **he's trying to ask you out!**_ Kate replies quickly.

_**well what do I say?!** _

_**yes... no... really up to you.** _

_**I don't know! I haven't been on a date in years!** _

_**YOUR CHOICE!** _

Kate snorts and locks her phone before turning her attention back to outside just in time to see Tom turning back towards them again, his face unreadable. He makes an exaggerated 'shooing' motion with his hand, and Kate turns to the rest of the crowd still hovering around the window. "We... should probably leave him to it." There's a grumble of agreement, and a shuffling of children that sees Sofia clutching Edie, and Mackenzie in the arms of Cleo, supported by Dutchy.

For the next five minutes they make conversation about a music concert Stella and Gracie had recently attended, all aware that Tom is outside still on the phone. When he arrives back in the room, Stella breaks off mid sentence and slams a hand on the table. "So? What's the verdict?"

"She said yes." Tom tries to hide his smile, giving a grudging nod towards Kate. "And that's all the detail you get."

* * *

"So should I feel weirded out that our boss is going on a date with my cousin?" Dutchy frowns. "I mean, what's worse? Christmas lunch with her, or them breaking up and her transferring me to Perth?"

"And what if they hit it off?" Kate challenges, reaching across Dutchy for the nappy bag as Edie happily kicks her legs. "She could be the love of his life..."

"Hey, I'm not opposed to it." He holds up his hands. "It's just a bit odd, isn't it?"

Kate turns to Dutchy, before turning to their girls. "Weirder things have happened." She smiles. "I mean, you look at us. When you first came on the boat we couldn't even talk to each other without fighting and now... now we've got a family. We're married. We have our beautiful girls."

"My four beautiful girls." Dutchy grins, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Yeah, I guess weirder things have happened. But nothing as good as this. I wouldn't change this for anything."

"No." Kate agrees. "Neither would I."


	34. Chapter 34

"What about this? Four bedrooms, study and second study nook? Pool, nice backyard." Dutchy reads out each selling point as he flicks idly through each picture. "Looks nice enough. What do you think?"

Kate peers over Dutchy's shoulder, and can't deny that the house looks nice. "Yeah, but is Caravonica too far from base? And I don't really want to pull Zee out in her final year at school." Dutchy locks his phone, rolling over to stare at the roof.

"I feel old. Since when did we spend mornings in bed talking about real estate and mortgages?" Dutchy groans, his gaze on the ceiling fan as it whirrs, valiantly trying to counteract the lazy Cairns heat. "Are we old?"

"Seeing as I'm older than you, I'm going to go ahead and say no." Kate murmurs, unable to hide her smile as she moves her head forwards to whisper in his ear. "And besides, you didn't seem so old last night." She takes the opportunity and uses his chest as a platform to lift herself up somewhat so she can catch the glowing numbers on the clock - 0643. Smirking, she turns back to her husband, resting her head on his chest, his phone now thoroughly abandoned. She closes her eyes and savours the peace, his heartbeat in her ear, his arms wrapped around her. "How much longer do you reckon we have?"

"I think we're already in overtime." Dutchy muses, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "So any second now-" As if on cue, there's a loud thump of someone jumping from the top bunk, and the pitter-patter of feet running down the hall. Kate just manages to roll out of the way as one of the girls catapults themselves into the bed. Dutchy is not so lucky, and Kate hears his wheeze as, with a giggle that identifies her as Edie, she lands on his chest.

A moment later, Corinne walks in, moving slowly and carefully, due to the cooing infant in her arms. Of course, it's not exactly the most ceremonious way to be carried, with one of Corinne's hands under each of Isla's armpits and her hands linked in front of Isla's chest, securing her, but Isla is used to being carried by the twins and, provided they don't carry her up or down the stairs, Kate is fine with them bringing the baby in to them. "Isla is awake!" Corinne announces unnecessarily, holding her sister out. Dutchy takes the ten-month-old from her, and Corinne too climbs up onto the bed.

"Mummy! Daddy!" Edie squeals, apparently unable to contain her enthusiasm as she bounces up and down, winding Dutchy once more.

"Edes, easy." Dutchy lifts the girl up and deposits Edie onto the mattress in between them, but this doesn't seem to perturb her. Edie's smile widens as she turns to her twin and grins.

"We're free!" She and Corinne chorus, snuggling into the spot between their parents, so that Kate is left clinging to the sheets for dear life so as not to fall unceremoniously onto the carpet.

"Free from what?!" Dutchy mock-gasps, earning an incredulous scoff from Edie and a giggly slap in the mouth from Isla.

"No, Daddy!" Corinne groans, with the painstaking air of someone explaining something simple to someone quite dim. "We're  _free years old!_ "

"Oooooohhh..." Dutchy gives an exaggerated look towards Kate, jabbing a finger in her direction. "Did you know about this?"

"Hmm... I don't know." Kate reaches out and grabs Edie, squeezing her tightly in her arms. "Are you sure you're three? I thought you were my little babies?"

"No!" Edie giggles, squirming in Kate's arms. "Isla's the baby. She still wears nappies and drinks bottles!"

"Yeah, we're big girls! Just ask Auntie Zee! I'll go!" Corinne squirms out of the bed, shouting at the top of her voice. "Auntie Zee! Auntie Zee!"

"Corinne, she's sleeping!" Kate hisses, intending on running after Corrie and pulling her back, but it's too late, for Kate hears the banging of the door that tells her Corinne has already barged into Mackenzie's room.

"She's awake!" Corinne's voice calls back gleefully a few seconds later, and after a while she returns, a pyjama-clad Mackenzie following sleepily.

"Sorry, Zee." Kate flashes an apologetic grin as Mackenzie hovers awkwardly at the end of their bed. "Go back to bed if you want. I'll try to contain the chaos."

"All good." Zee gives an enormous yawn, and takes a slow step towards Corinne that has her trembling with equal measures of fear and excitement. "I might just  _tickle_ the chaos instead!" Before Corinne can do more than squeak, Mackenzie scoops her up, holding her by the legs as she tickles her mercilessly. "You  _dare_ wake me!" She calls out in a mock-outraged tone.

"No! No!" Gasps Corinne between feverish giggles. "Sorry! No more!"

Dutchy takes the time to stand up, handing Isla over to Kate while he heads towards the wardrobe and extracting several presents, and to the soundtrack of both twins' giggles, Kate takes the time to peer at her youngest daughter. Isla truly is the spitting image of the girls, practically indistinguishable from the photographs of the twins when they were younger. The only difference is the dark brown eyes she'd inherited off Dylan, instead of the green the twins had gotten off of Kate. "Hey, Isla, baby. Did they wake you up?"

Edie pauses in her egging on of both Corinne and Mackenzie, and turns to face her mother, her tone injected with far more attitude than a three year old should technically have. "Uh, she woke  _us_ up. She threw her dummy at me." She gives an exaggerated little head tip apparently intended to convey seriousness.

Kate barely suppresses a laugh. "Well, you girls were the ones that wanted to share your room with her."

Edie shrugs. "It's okay. She can stay. We love her. But maybe I want the top bunk tonight."

Mackenzie finally releases a gasping Corinne, depositing her on the mattress before turning back to the doorway. "I suppose I'd better go get your pressies then, too!" She declares, taking a step down the hall.

"And check her makeup." Corinne says in a teasing voice.

"For her  _boyfriend._ " Finishes Edie, accompanying the words with kissing noises.

Mackenzie rolls her eyes and leaves. Kate, on the other hand, turns sternly to face the girls. "A little less teasing, please. We're all meeting him today for the first time and-"

"And she will not be kissing anyone." Dutchy finishes, a serious look on his face.

Kate turns to face him. "Ah, Dutchy, that's not what I was going to say."

Dutchy adopts an expression Kate would associate with someone being forced to drink mud. "She's... she's too young to be kissing boys."

"She's seventeen." Kate rolls her eyes. Of course, she was hardly ready for Mackenzie to have a serious boyfriend either, but she was at least being a little more realistic about it than Dutchy. "Be nice to the poor guy, won't you?"

"When I've determined he's good enough for Zee, yeah."

"Oh, you guys are  _not_ allowed to interrogate Matt, okay?" Mackenzie groans, returning with two neatly wrapped presents; one purple and one green. "And you two," She turns to the twins. "No teasing him, okay? He hasn't got terrors in his family. He won't know what to do."

A truly evil smile spreads across their faces. "Oh, we'll be good." They chorus.

* * *

The rest of the morning passes in a sea of chaos and noise. Edie and Corinne race through the house, singing as their favourite Disney princesses, dressed in black and pretending to be ninjas, and, worst of all, come downstairs after apparently raiding Kate's makeup, with red Joker smiles and eyes so thick with eyeshadow their facewashers stain blue. For the most part, Isla crawls around after them all, the knees of her tights filthy from their constant contact with the ground that Kate would have sworn was clean, had it not been for the evidence now in front of her.

Dutchy and Mackenzie spend most of the morning in the kitchen, preparing food for the day, while Kate heads outside to begin setting up the decorations that had been stored in the shed for weeks in preparation. "Remember, no balloons, Mummy." Corinne murmurs soberly, peering up at Kate as she stands on a chair to hang a string of red and black twisted streamers. "I'm scared of them."

"I remember." Kate assures her, glancing at her watch. "There are definitely no balloons. But can you girls go and get ready, please? And I'll be able to help you get ready when I'm done here. Everyone's going to be here soon."

They nod, racing up towards their room, and after a suspicious crashing sound, Kate follows to see one of the drawers from the dresser on the floor, clothes spilling everywhere. Without even asking what happened, Corinne points to Edie. "She was trying to climb."

"Snitch!" Edie cries back. Intervening before the two could go any further, Kate puts on her best  _Navy_ voice and steps between them.

"Hey!" Kate moves to stand in between them. "Both of you, go and put the clothes back in the drawers. Then get dressed. If you're not done in five minutes, the party is cancelled."

By the time Kate exits the room, leaving two dutifully working children in her wake, it's to see Mackenzie, grinning at her. "Are you even a mother if you don't threaten to cancel one party?" She smirks, before Kate can say anything. "Are you right if I go pick up Matt? We might hang out at his for a bit then we'll be back. Most of the cooking is done and-"

"Ah, yeah, that's fine." Kate nods, then calls out after Zee's retreating back. "Actually, can we have a chat? Ah... in here?" She leads the way into hers and Dutchy's room, sitting on the edge of the bed and inviting Zee to do the same. Mackenzie looks completely perplexed, and even Kate has to admit she's far from ready to have this conversation.

"You okay?" Zee frowns.

"I just... wanted to talk to you about Matt." Mackenzie nods slowly, and Kate ploughs on. "I know you've dated before but this is the only guy you've introduced us to, so things must be... kind of serious? I mean, you like him?"

"Yeah." Mackenzie agrees. "And..."

"And..." Kate takes a deep breath, then decides to rip the bandaid off. "I mean, you're my little girl, and no one wants to think of this, but I want to know if... you want to go on birth control."

"What?" Mackenzie pushes herself to her feet. "Are... are you seriously... trying to give me the talk?"

"I don't know how the talk is supposed to go!" Kate defends. "I mean, I know you understand the mechanics of the whole situation, and I guess after three nieces you get that pregnancy usually leads to a kid, but..." Kate takes a deep breath, forcing herself to calm down. "Look, I'm not saying it's for now. I'm just talking... in the future. Whether it's in a month or a year. I just want to know, so you know that when it happens, you're... you're ready and you're safe."

Mackenzie blinks at her, twisting her bracelet in circles. "Kate, this is beyond awkward."

"I know." Kate agrees, wishing she'd at least brought a glass of wine in with her. "But I'd rather you be awkward for a few minutes now than feel awkward for nine months before you're ready to." She folds her arms. "Look, I just want you to know that... I can take you to the doctors. You can talk about it. Even if you don't do anything. You don't even have to ask me. You can just say... uh... pineapple juice or something."

Mackenzie looks even more bewildered. "And what if I just want juice?"

"Look, I don't know!" Kate throws her hands up in the air. "I'm trying here! You could meet me half way! All I'm saying is if you need... pineapple juice... let me know, okay? Or if you don't feel like you can ask me, then... your medicare card is in my wallet and you can make an appointment any time you need to."

Mackenzie opens her mouth and closes it for several moments, before nodding soberly. "Okay, Kate. I know what you're saying, and... and I will ask you. When I need it. But... it's not now."

"Okay." Kate lets out a breath she didn't know she was holding. "Well, when you do, you know... you can come to me? And... just... don't... rush. If you're not ready."

"Okay." Mackenzie stands up, running her hands down the legs of her jeans. "Thanks." She hesitates for a moment, then sits down again. For one terrifying moment, Kate is sure Mackenzie is going to tell her that she's already having sex, or pregnant or something else to warrant the terrified look on her face. "Kate, I've been thinking, I can try and rent a flat. There's stuff around-"

"What?! No!" Kate shakes her head, torn between relief at the subject change and horror that Mackenzie genuinely thought there wasn't room for her here. "You don't need to move out!"

Mackenzie peers down the hall. "You've got Isla squeezed in with the twins. There's not enough space for them all-"

"There is for now. And we've been looking at different places. With room for us all."

"But-"

"No buts!" Kate shakes her head. "Look, Zee... do you want to move out? I mean, aside from the wake up calls from the twins and them attacking you with silly string while you were in the shower that time... do you  _want_ to go?"

Mackenzie bites her lip. "No."

Kate smiles. "So then, you don't. This is your home, Zee. With us. Every last... crazy thing. Children included."

Mackenzie smirks and raises an eyebrow. "Does this mean you're planning on having more kids?"

Kate looks aghast. "Us? No! Shop is closed. We're... uh... well, the losing gender of the games this year is who has to get... I don't know what the female terms is? He gets the snip, or I get my tubes tied."

Zee shakes her head with a mixture of incredulity and amusement. "I genuinely can't believe Christmas has come down to this." She lowers her voice and adopts a scandalised whisper. "What would Santa say?"

Kate gives a nonchalant shrug. "Hey, Tom wanted to call me a cheat for having Isla too. I think he's hoping you'll bring a boyfriend along. And now that Stella and Gracie are fostering Jack and Kaia, that should add a few members to the boys team, so it should be sort of even? But I still reckon we could take them. We're coming off three consecutive wins and we're strategists."

Mackenzie shakes her head again. "You really fit into this Mulholland family, you know?"

Kate smiles, and wraps an arm around Mackenzie. "So do you, babe. So do you."

* * *

With the twins dressed in their pirate clothes, and Kate and Dutchy donning their own striped pirate ensembles, Kate finds herself in the kitchen, running over the last minute stuff with Dutchy. "So the food is all done. Hot food just needs to get warmed up. Party bags are done, nibblies are out-"

"Kate." Dutchy interrupts, placing a hand on her forearm. "It's all done. We're good."

Kate sighs, leaning into him. "Hey, it's the first party the twins will actually remember. I want it to be amazing."

"And it will be." Dutchy assures her, pressing a kiss to her lips. Kate moans, deepening it, amazed that after all these years, he could still make her pulse quicken and her heart skip a beat and-

"Oi," Kate pulls away as a foam sword hits her in the back of the head and, turning, sees Zee rolling her eyes. "Unless you want to scar a whole bunch of kids, I'd give that a rest. People are here." She grabs the hand of the boy next to her. "And guys, this is Matt. Matt, this is my sister Kate and her husband Dylan. Or Dutchy. Who apparently can't keep their hands off each other."

Kate gives an amused cough and reaches out a hand. "Matt, nice to meet you." She smiles. The teenager looks nice enough and, from what Mackenzie had told them, is relatively smart too.

Dutchy however is more reserved, and Kate can see him raking his gaze over every aspect of Matt's appearance, from his floppy hair to his immaculate red converse sneakers.

"Matt." He spits out the name as though it's a filthy curse. "Is that short for Matthew?" He stares sternly at the teenager.

"Uh, yes Sir." Matt gasps.

"Hmm..." Dutchy frowns, taking a step closer. "I'm sure I don't have to tell you what an amazing girl Mackenzie is."

"No, Sir."

"Dutchy!" Mackenzie groans, grabbing Matt's hand and threading her fingers through his. "Seriously."

Kate rests a hand on Dutchy's shoulder and, rather reluctantly, he holds out his hand. Judging by Matt's wince, he'd squeezed rather tight. "Hurt my girl, and you'll have us to answer to." He smiles sweetly. "And the defence force taught us a few tricks, didn't it Kate?"

"Oh my gosh!" Mackenzie groans, tugging Matt's hand and pulling him away. Kate waits until they're gone, then slaps Dutchy on the arm.

"Seriously?"

"Hey, I had to do a little threatening." Dutchy defends. "I don't want her getting hurt."

"You're terrible." Kate can't stop the smile though, even as a knock sounds at the door.

* * *

Twenty minutes later and the backyard is full of tiny pirates, all dashing around clutching foam swords, chased of course by 2Dads. His fiancee of eighteen months, Bel, watches fondly, feeding their two-month-old son Malakai. "He loves those girls." Bel muses, as 2Dads permits Corinne to catch him and drag him, pouting, to jail. "Always finding little things for them."

"Yeah, the girls have a wardrobe that can attest to that." Kate agrees, smiling. "He's been a great help. Their favourite babysitter by far." It had taken even Kate by surprise when she'd permitted him to look after the girls, but they'd never come back with anything so much as a scratch on them, regaling her with tales of catching yabbies, playing Frisbee or building volcanoes with bicarb and vinegar. "He's amazing with them. And with Isla. Dotes on them so much."

"Yeah, he's amazing with kids." Bel glances down at their son. "When Malakai was colicky and sick, he'd just walk with him for hours, singing. He's... amazing."

Kate smiles. "Yeah, I mean when I first met him, the idea of him ever settling down seemed ridiculous, and I would never have let him even look  _at_  my kids, let alone  _after_ them. But now... he's grown up a lot."

"Well, he puts a lot of that down to you." Bel smiles at Kate. "Seriously, some of the stories he's told me. About the pearl poachers, and you helping him out time after time... it really means a lot to him." Before Kate can respond, there's a clattering of feet, and 2Dads approaches, panting and out of breath.

"Urgh. How do your kids have so much energy? They must have absorbed all that caffeine in the womb." He grins at Kate.

"Hey, I stopped my coffees." She protests, then amends her statement at 2Dads' raised eye. "Well... mostly. I had two scoops. Or three. Sometimes four. But... I need it! And they... probably... split it between the two of them?" Kate supplies. "Best coffee of my life after I stopped breastfeeding Isla. I felt like I'd been sleeping for over a year!" She catches sight of some of the parents from the twins' preschool over in the corner, and smiles. "Anyway, I should go greet the normal Mums. Excuse me."

The mothers were all clumped in a corner of the yard, staring in horror at the elaborately pirate-themed party, complete with life jackets ( _borrowed_ , definitely  _borrowed_ ) from  _Hammersley,_ lifebouys and a pirate-shaped play equipment that Harrison and Dutchy had made the girls. On the back wall are two signs, just like the sign on the  _Hammersley,_ proudly proclaiming  ** _HMAS Thunder_  **and  ** _HMAS Lightning._**

"You've... ah, definitely gone with the sea theme, then?" One of the mothers, Kylie, says. Kate has never particularly been able to warm with her, always finding her to expect to be treated like a VIP at the centre due to her older children having previously attended. However, Kate plasters a smile on her face and nods.

"Well, with our family, and the kids' latest obsession with pirates, what else could we do?" She beams, tugging her own pirate dress down so that it sits on her waist better.

"And you sure have a large social group for a stay-at-home mother." Kylie smiles a wide, fake smile. "If only  _I_ had the time you do."

"Actually, I work. My husband and I are both in the Navy." Kate's smile widens at the shocked look on Kylie's face. "Yeah, he's training to be a sub-lieutenant at the moment, and I'm working at NAVCOM as second-in-charge. Which is working quite well with the twins at daycare. Sometimes Isla comes to work with me. There's a creche at NAVCOM now, which has been amazing. Most of these people..." Kate gestures around, "are Navy families."

"Oh." She looks as though she's swallowed poison.

"Yeah, Kylie, didn't you see Kate on the news the other night?" One of the more kind mothers, Hannah, chimes in. "She was in charge of the press conference about all the drugs confiscated over the last twelve months, and their latest strike force."

"I... I..." She swallows. "I don't have time to watch the news." She storms off without another word. Hannah waits until she's gone, then snorts with laughter.

"That... was worth it. I don't think anyone has ever shut her down before." Hannah giggles.

"You know I wasn't on the news, right?" Kate frowns, leaning closer.

"I know." Hannah grins mischievously. "But, hey, she spends half her life driving around to community events trying to get on the news. It was worth it just to see her face."

* * *

Maxine hovers anxiously, clutching Isla to her as though she's a lifeline. Occasionally, the young girl will reach out and take hold of the pendant on Maxine's necklace, at other times simply smiling up at the woman. Kate approaches, two glasses of wine in hand, and passes one to Maxine. "Cheers." Maxine thanks her, taking a gulp. "I'm still not used to these big family things."

"Neither am I, if I'm honest." Kate admits, peering out at all the people crammed into her backyard and just catches sight of Malin darting into the twins' cubby house, probably to hide from all the noise. "Using my daughter as a lifeline?"

Maxine only looks slightly embarrassed. "Hey, she's a good shield. And Tom's abandoned me." She gestures towards the spot where Tom is chatting with Dutchy, Corinne and Edie clinging to a leg each.

"So, things are going well then?" Kate can't help the sing-song voice she adopts. "You're almost at 3 years now."

"Yeah, I guess. I really like him." She flinches. "Urgh. I can't believe I said that. I feel like such a  _girl._ "

"News flash! You are a girl!" Kate points out. "Regardless of whether you know how to shoot a gun or not."

Maxine rolls her eyes and takes another sip of her wine, changing the subject. "So, I hear you guys are moving. Is there another Mulholland on the way?" She grins.

"Hey, we are  _looking_ at houses. Having three kids in one room is not exactly sustainable. And I'm drinking wine. That shop is shut!" As if to emphasise her point, Kate takes another gulp of wine.

"Tom wants us to get a place together." Maxine says in a rush.

"About time!" Kate slaps a hand to her leg, smiling widely.

Maxine gives her a withering look. "I... I'm... I'm old!"

"Ha!" Kate lets out a bark of laughter before catching sight of the anxious expression on Maxine's face. "Sorry. It's just that that's exactly what I told Dutchy when he told me he loved me. And look at us now!" Kate waves a hand around the backyard.

"And do you want to move in with him?"

"But with Ryan and-"

"Ryan's an adult! He's got his own place." Kate peers at Maxine. "He knows you're dating him."

"I know, and Tom's great with him. It's just... I don't want him to realise ten years down the track that I'm not what he wanted. I'm ten years older than him! And he wants a family and-"

"If there's one thing I've learned, it's that families come in all different shapes and sizes. But... it sounds like this is stuff you need to talk to him about."

Maxine twists her wrists. "Yeah. I... I know." She hesitates for a moment. "You know, you do give really good advice. When you've got your next kid, you should write an 'Agony Aunt'."

"Cheek!" Kate rolls her eyes. "No more kids. I'm done."

Maxine lowers her voice. "I seem to recall you guys saying that after the twins were born, and yet..." She lifts Isla up higher, earning a giggle.

"Hey, I blame the Navy for that one." Kate grins, adopting a kid-friendly voice as she turns to Isla. "One Naval Gala in Brisbane with Daddy and nine months later here you are!"

* * *

"Attention everyone!" Dutchy calls out. "Guys! Bit of shoosh!" The chatter carries on, oblivious to Dutchy's attempts to regain control. After watching him struggle for another ten seconds Kate steps in.

"Quiet, Sailors!" She calls out, and silence falls immediately. She throws a victorious grin towards her husband and gestures for him to take the floor.

"Thanks, Babe." He grins, as all eyes turn to him. "Kate and I wanted to thank you all for coming here to celebrate our little girls' third birthday. It seems like only yesterday that they were born, with what seemed like half the Navy pacing the halls outside. And I just wanted to take a moment to thank you all for being here. Some of you, we've known for a short time." He nods politely at the corner where the preschool mums have congregated. "And some of you, we've known for years, long before Kate stopped jumping onto speed boats and taking down pirates." There's a polite scattering of laughter as Kate flushes. "Now we're parents to four beautiful girls, and I can honestly say it's been a more terrifying job than getting kidnapped by whiskey smugglers and tied up halfway to sea - true story." The non-Navy are instantly recognisable as they exchange curious looks. "We just wanted to take the time to thank you all. Our children are so blessed to have so many aunts, uncles and cousins in their lives. Genetics be damned, guys. You have all played such an important part in our children's life. You are our family." He grins widely. "So, with that in mind, 2Dads has been bugging me for the pinata for hours. Now we're all loved out, let's hit some stuff!"

Laughing, the twins follow quickly in 2Dads' wake. Kate smiles, allowing Dutchy to wrap his arm around her waist. There was no need to rush, she reasoned. She and her family had all the time in the world.


End file.
